When's a "good time", history of Endo, worried time running out

Nicman

Hi ladies,
Hope you're all well :-)
Short history: 33 years old. Had endometriosis & the op 6 ish years ago & coil in. It came back 3 years ago, coil removed, found cysts on ovary, on the pill to manage pain & keep endo at bay.
The docs keep telling me to get on with it, the longer I wait the less chance of conceiving.
Life: Just got married this year after a really hectic couple of years, and after a stern warning from the doc in January we're considering starting to try.
2 issues:
1 - As soon as I come off the pill endo will probably flare up, looking at medical issues if we can't conceive, also if we can't conceive we're facign a long road as many ladies here know too well and we don't know if we can handle the stress of it after a hectic and stressful few years.
2 - We feel we're not ready for a baby yet as we're just getting used to a new house, new dogs, newlywed etc and want to enjoy that. But the pressure to start trying feels immense.
Anyone here with the same experience or advice on making our minds up!? ....Very torn right now over this

Thanks

elly123

Hi Nicman,

Congrats on your wedding and new house & dogs

I too have endometriosis and spent all my teenage years on the pill and other treatments. I came off it Xmas 2011 and started trying for a baby Straight away, i had an appt to see my gyne in the coombe in March 2012 and i told her we had been trying for a baby since Jan, she said she would bring me in for a laparoscopy to ensure the endo was cleared and flush my tubes to ensure no bloackages she said the 1st 3 mths after the op were vital for trying. To cut a long story short i had the op the end of march 2012 and i conceived the start of July. I had a healthy preg and now have a healthy 13.5mth old boy.

My advice to anyone with endo is to believe that you will have a baby. ttc is very stressful for both people involved. It totally consumed me and i was constantly saying it wasn't but it was. My poor husband would dread coming home from work around the week of ovulation as it became a chore and wasn't enjoyable. We both decided that after 6 mths of trying we would stop and plan our wedding instead. so we both relaxed and forgot about TTC and just got back to enjoying it.... I was waiting for my period to arrive in July before telling people about our wedding and the date and low and behold it never arrived I was pregnant. I'm a big believer in everything happens for a reason. I was so stressed and consumed by the fact i wanted to get pregnant and everyone around me seemed to be pregnant and i believe that's what was stopping it happening, where as when we relaxed it happened.

Im sorry that your already feeling so much pressure, people can be really nasty and not realise it, maybe come off the pill and don't put pressure on yourselves and enjoy newly married life and if it happens it happens plus when it does happen you have 9mths to prepare so you can still enjoy yourself before a baby arrives. If after a couple of months nothing is happening maybe go back and speak with your doctor and ask that tests be carried out or even a laparoscopy to clear any endo and flush the tubes to ensure no blackages.

If you would like to ask me any other questions feel free to DM me, its always nice to talk to someone that understands what you are going through xxx

Best wishes to you and your husband xxx

Nicman

Thanks so much Elly and congrats - what a success story! So thats a good idea, rather than keep on trying etc to see a gyne and get it flushed as you say sounds like a great idea. I guess the GPs just advised us to go for it and keep at it until nothing is happening and after a year of trying ew'll be another 6 months minimum on a waiting list to see a fertility specialist. So look like best thing is to go straight to gyne if nothing is happening.

im literally 2 week away from having to start the pill again after a month's (accidental) break - I ran out. And i keep putting off going to the GP to get my prescription.... it's a tough one it really is. Like you were ready to go - if I hadn't endo there's no way we'd be considering starting this early you know....

elly123

My gp was the exact same when i said we were trying her response was 'oh we wouldn't investigate until you were trying for at least 2 years, and my response was but i have endometriosis and she said oh well in that case we'd intervene after a year' she really pissed me off! i was just lucky that i had a follow up appt with the gyne in the coombe in the march otherwise i would have had to ask the gp to referr me again and that can take months. I was with the same gyne for 13 years with the endo and then she looked after me all through my pregnancy. I was one of her success stories, when she scanned me for the first time and seeing the baby she was so happy she always worried we'd never see the day. Unfortunately she has retired now, but she was amazing.

Not all gynes will agree on doing the lap but i think if you get a good gyne that specialises in endo, they will do everything they can for you, if your ttc for a long period.

Hahaha im the same im on a break since Xmas just havent got round to getting my prescription renewed. But we've been extra careful as we're in the middle of moving. I would love another one in a year or two. Two years is the plan! Im defo going back on the pill this month

There never is a right time tho, i think just go with it, stay positive and blank out all the nagging and pressure from people, as irritating as it is for people to be putting pressure on ya, just smile at them

Nicman

It's gas, like it's so common you'd think the GPs would be more proactive with it! That really is a great story and does make me feel better about it all! The naggers don't bother me yet as we're not long married and I can laugh and joke but I'd say after a few years it'd get pretty old pretty fast :-) I always say "we're too young for kids" even though we're 33 & 40! confuses them for a while.....