Godfather - Christening - What's the deal?

Matt_Trakker

One of my mates had the idea of wanting me to be a godfather, I'm not religious and I think she only picked me coz of all her friends I think I'm the only one that was baptized.

Anyway, she's my mate so I'll do it for her and should anything happen the wee fellow of course I'll look after him if it ever comes to it.

Right, I've not been to a christening in about 15 years, what's the deal with gifts?
Or do I just hand over an envelope of cash......how much should it be?

It's in a month, so if I need to buy anything should have plenty of time to get it thru the internet.

January

Godparents don't automatically get care of the child if the parents were to die or not be able to look after them. I'd speak with your friend and ask her if that's what she wants you to do.

Chattastrophe!

Do they know you're not religious? If you're not sure, I'd probably mention it to them in case it's important to them.

As regards gifts, I'm not sure there's a standard. Rather than an envelope of cash, starting a credit union account for him may be an idea? Or could you offer to buy them one of the "big" things they'll need in the coming months? Or some sort of personal memento of the occasion. Maybe offer to buy the christening gown/shawl, if they haven't sorted it out already? In my opinion you should spend as much or as little as you want to, depending on what you can afford.

Moonbeam

You don't need to be baptised to be a god parent. Maybe ask the parents what present that they would like .

Roesy

Moonbeam wrote: »

You don't need to be baptised to be a god parent. Maybe ask the parents what present that they would like .

On the form for the christening in our local church it specified two godparents, one of each sex, who had been baptised and confirmed in the Catholic Church.

SaceyFlynn13

For my child the godfather bought us the christening outfit but before that he wanted to buy us a cot but we got that for free off a friend... But I think most god fathers give the priest an envolope with money in it

Chattastrophe!

SaceyFlynn13 wrote: »

For my child the godfather bought us the christening outfit but before that he wanted to buy us a cot but we got that for free off a friend... But I think most god fathers give the priest an envolope with money in it

I would have assumed that part was up to the parents ...?

Owryan

Roesy wrote: »

On the form for the christening in our local church it specified two godparents, one of each sex, who had been baptised and confirmed in the Catholic Church.

My eldests godparents are his uncle and his uncles partner, they are a gay couple.

My middle guy's godmother is my niece, she was 11 and unconfirmed when she stood for him .

Being asked to be godparent is nice and can be taken as a compliment but it doesn't have a life long burden attached to it, at least in my eyes.

Millem

Owryan wrote: »

My eldests godparents are his uncle and his uncles partner, they are a gay couple.

My middle guy's godmother is my niece, she was 11 and unconfirmed when she stood for him .

Being asked to be godparent is nice and can be taken as a compliment but it doesn't have a life long burden attached to it, at least in my eyes.

Our christening is next week, we were told at the info meeting that the godparents have to be over 16 years old

pwurple

Each parish seems to make its own guidelines on this, so I wouldn't assume the same goes across the board at all. My eldest godchild is 8 years younger than me, my newest daughter will have 3 male godparents.

On what's expected longterm, maybe just keep in touch with the child as they grow, so they know who you are. Even if its just bringing them to the park a couple of times when they are small. I think it's really nice to be asked, it means they think you will be part of their family for a long time.

I make sure to remember godchildren on their birthdays, with a phonecall/visit, card or small pressie. showing up at their communion and confirmation is nice. If you want to be godparent of the year, you could maybe do something with easter, christmas, advent etc.

For the ceremony, ask your friend what's expected.

Owryan

Millem wrote: »

Our christening is next week, we were told at the info meeting that the godparents have to be over 16 years old

I ve had 2 kids christened with a 3rd to be and I ve never even heard of a christening info meeting.

Its probably different in every county/parish tho, in Wicklow I know the godparents must be confirmed

Millem

Owryan wrote: »

I ve had 2 kids christened with a 3rd to be and I ve never even heard of a christening info meeting.

Its probably different in every county/parish tho, in Wicklow I know the godparents must be confirmed

We had to go! You are basically told what to expect etc. and also don't forget the €50!!!

Roesy

We don't have an info meeting but were told that the priest might call to visit us at home. No sign yet and the christening is in two weeks.

Mac B

SaceyFlynn13 wrote: »

For my child the godfather bought us the christening outfit but before that he wanted to buy us a cot but we got that for free off a friend... But I think most god fathers give the priest an envolope with money in it

Ask the friend first if they want you to get anything in particular, if not maybe a silver kids money box (jewelers stock them), and don't forget to put money in it. As already said there is no legal duty involved as parents should specify a guardian in a will, keeping in touch d with the child is probably what is wanted, so they have another adult to them to if they fall out with parents when older

SaceyFlynn13

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

I would have assumed that part was up to the parents ...?

Ya it is up to the parent too but he wanted to buy it so we just left him

Chattastrophe!

SaceyFlynn13 wrote: »

Ya it is up to the parent too but he wanted to buy it so we just left him

No I meant that it's usually up to the parents to pay the priest for the christening. I definitely wouldn't expect one of the godparents to do it!

SaceyFlynn13

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

No I meant that it's usually up to the parents to pay the priest for the christening. I definitely wouldn't expect one of the godparents to do it!

We did pay for the priest but I'm just saying iv been told by a good few ppl that the god father is too give money to the priest to pay for the christening I know a good few ppl who actually gave it to the priest

Chattastrophe!

So are you saying that both the parents AND the godparents are expected to make a contribution to the church/priest? In addition to any gifts they might wish to give to the child?

Wow ... I'm glad I'll never be a godparent!

eviltwin

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

So are you saying that both the parents AND the godparents are expected to make a contribution to the church/priest? In addition to any gifts they might wish to give to the child?

Wow ... I'm glad I'll never be a godparent!

I never did, wasn't asked and tbh have never heard of it before. paying the priest should be the sole responsibility of the parents

Mac B

eviltwin wrote: »

I never did, wasn't asked and tbh have never heard of it before. paying the priest should be the sole responsibility of the parents

I agree, as a father of two kids and God Father of 5, I've never heard of the godparents paying the priest. Once the parents gave me the priest's envelope containing cash to hand to him, as sometimes happens at weddings where the best man holds the envelopes to pay the neccessary people on the day!

pwurple

Never heard of godparents giving money to the priest here either.

SaceyFlynn13

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

So are you saying that both the parents AND the godparents are expected to make a contribution to the church/priest? In addition to any gifts they might wish to give to the child?

Wow ... I'm glad I'll never be a godparent!

No I'm not saying that we paid for the priest the god father got his outfit.. But as I said I have heard of god fathers paying priests..