The biggest lies you've told your parents (as an adult) ?

whirlpool

What is the biggest lie you've told your parents as an adult?

I don't really lie to them anymore but there is a big one about myself that I've been keeping from them for a few months that I feel bad about but it's for their own good, it doesn't affect them in any way but they'd be annoyed if they found out. It's akin to them lying to me about Santa for nine years :pac:

Neyite

You first.

That I'm straight

there extremely religious and homophobic so I'm not telling them noting

The Backwards Man

Of course I won't throw you in a home Dad.

Legs.Eleven

Probably that I'm feeling grand when I'm not. I don't like them worrying about me. Other than that, I conveniently leave out some details about my life they don't need to know, which is not lying as such.


I was an awful liar when I was a kid/teenager though.

Duggy747

No Mammy, I'm grand. I don't need any money.


*Fastens bailing twine around black bag pants*

BBJBIG

What stains - I blew me Nose with the bed sheet ...

Aglomerado

"I only paid X for that insert frivolous object here".

(Where x = half of actual price.)

stefan idiot jones

I've no idea where Tiddles has got to?

sbsquarepants

My washing machine is broken:D

Yogosan

I'm adopted.

flutered

girls never tell their mums everything, never have, never will.

sbsquarepants

Aglomerado wrote: »

" insert frivolous object here".

I'm getting this printed on knickers for the girlfriends birthday.

Aglomerado

sbsquarepants wrote: »

I'm getting this printed on knickers for the girlfriends birthday.

Feck I knew when I posted it that there was a double entendre in there! (Fnarr!)

Glebee

It was only low alcohol beer....

Mr. CooL ICE

No, I've never taken drugs. Sure, look at me. I'm healthy, have a good job and exercise regularly. Couldn't do all that on drugs now, could I?

sbsquarepants

Aglomerado wrote: »

Feck I knew when I posted it that there was a double entendre in there! (Fnarr!)

I think that counts as a quadruple!

imitation

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Probably that I'm feeling grand when I'm not. I don't like them worrying about me. Other than that, I conveniently leave out some details about my life they don't need to know, which is not lying as such.


I was an awful liar when I was a kid/teenager though.

This right here, theres this funny cold war between parents and adult kids about medical stuff where they leave out anything too worrysome!

gammygils

Separate Rooms. Of course!

cletus van damme

LordChessington wrote: »

No, I've never taken drugs. Sure, look at me. I'm healthy, have a good job and exercise regularly. Couldn't do all that on drugs now, could I?

ha ha.. I've been dragged into a discussion a few times on so and so and their filthy drug habit. As usual I chime in saying "and he is such a nice lad, terrible shame......"

frequently it's about a relative i socialise a bit with and I play down my involvement with him. terrible I know.

kylith

Smoked for ten years, 'the house smells like smoke because my friends smoke'. Maybe she knew, but she never let on if she did.

suicide_circus

Direct lies? Not really. Lies of omission? Manifold.

flutered

i would never have sex on a first date, never mind after getting pulled in a pub.

qwertyabcd

that I didn't smoke, the smell of smoke was because all the girls I worked with smoked, I quit smoking a month later anyway

I go sparingly on the outright lies but I'm generous with omissions (usually).

Recently there was the 'Mum, I can't drive up for X's wedding tomorrow, I've a sprained ankle and I've to keep it elevated. No, no, I'm grand, I can manage by myself. No, I didn't fall because I was drinking, I just twisted it out of the blue. No, it's been x-rayed, theres no fracture. No, it's not in plaster. No, what's tubigrip?... Besides, I hit my head and I have a headache. No, my pupils are the same size. No, no, I didn't black out...'

'Alright, I'll be there before dinner '

The moral of the story is never tell a health lie to an MD.

Vito Corleone

My parents never told me the word "fart" until I was about ten. We used to say windy-woo. :P

For some reason my Mum didn't like the word "fart", hahahaha. Windy woo.

Sinister Pigeon

"You are my parents."

Vito Corleone

Vito Corleone wrote: »

My parents never told me the word "fart" until I was about ten. We used to say windy-woo. :P

For some reason my Mum didn't like the word "fart", hahahaha. Windy woo.

I think that's adorable

PizzamanIRL

I never speed. I'm a safe driver.

Legs.Eleven

imitation wrote: »

This right here, theres this funny cold war between parents and adult kids about medical stuff where they leave out anything too worrysome!

I was talking more about being down in the dumps or not feeling fantastic mentally but yeah, same thing I suppose. I've never had serious physical medical problems, thank jaysus. I think I'd actually tell my dad and step-merm if I did tbh.

cactuspaw

That I've never smoked, I'd say they have a fair idea.

maguic24

I swear, I'm going with my class to Amsterdam for purely academic reasons.

No way, I'd never smoke weed or go to sex shows.....

Adamantium

Little over 30 years ago, I forgot to tell my daddy that I had a sister.

Dad: You cannot hide forever.
Me: I will not fight you.
Dad: Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends. Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for... sister. So, you have a twin sister. Your feelings have now betrayed her, too. Jimmy was wise to hide her from me. Now his failure is complete. If you will not turn to the Dark Side... then perhaps she will...

Told them I fell down the stairs and hurt my leg, it was extremely badly bruised - completely black and I couldn't really walk.

I had actually come off the back of a motorbike that went up in the air and landed back on top of me but didn't want them worrying about me.

Sorry mam and dad I ye're reading

sullivlo

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

I was talking more about being down in the dumps or not feeling fantastic mentally but yeah, same thing I suppose. I've never had serious physical medical problems, thank jaysus. I think I'd actually tell my dad and step-merm if I did tbh.

Mental health problems are health problems too!! It's the stigma that needs to be broken so that people feel okay saying "I don't feel okay" or "I need help". If we had a headache we would tell people and take paracetamol, so why should people be ashamed to take a different pill when it's inside their head that's sore?

I don't really tell outright lies. More leave out details or don't tell the story. Maybe telling mum that my hangover was food poisoning. That was a fun one.

wendell borton

It wasn't me.

Arthur Beesley

Duggy747 wrote: »

No Mammy, I'm grand. I don't need any money.


*Fastens bailing twine around black bag pants*

No recession in that house.

Mariasofia

Only lies of omission.....
Me at 18 vomiting after copious amounts of black russians......
Dad : " I told ya to stay away from that poisonous chipper!"
Me: silence.........

Arthur Beesley

BBJBIG wrote: »

What stains - I blew me Nose with the bed sheet ...

Or that big brown stain is chocolate. Honest.

Arthur Beesley

Candie wrote: »

I go sparingly on the outright lies but I'm generous with omissions (usually).

Recently there was the 'Mum, I can't drive up for X's wedding tomorrow, I've a sprained ankle and I've to keep it elevated. No, no, I'm grand, I can manage by myself. No, I didn't fall because I was drinking, I just twisted it out of the blue. No, it's been x-rayed, theres no fracture. No, it's not in plaster. No, what's tubigrip?... Besides, I hit my head and I have a headache. No, my pupils are the same size. No, no, I didn't black out...'

'Alright, I'll be there before dinner '

The moral of the story is never tell a health lie to an MD.

Yeah, the Managing Director will catch you out every time.

lazeedaisy

Duggy747 wrote: »

No Mammy, I'm grand. I don't need any money.


*Fastens bailing twine around black bag pants*

Lost my job 2 months ago, it's tough saying no to mine but I would never let her know I am smashed broke.

Legs.Eleven

Mental health problems are health problems too!! It's the stigma that needs to be broken so that people feel okay saying "I don't feel okay" or "I need help". If we had a headache we would tell people and take paracetamol, so why should people be ashamed to take a different pill when it's inside their head that's sore?

Yes I am aware of all that but I'm talking about what I would and wouldn't tell my parents, not what constitutes as a health problem.

I said PHYSICAL medical problems to differentiate between what I would and wouldn't tell them. Two of my siblings had mental health problems (anorexia and depression) and I saw how worried my dad was about them as he couldn't simply call a doctor and "fix" them as easily as a broken leg, for example. I think people feel more helpless when someone they love has mental health problems as it isn't as simple as taking a pill or undergoing an operation.

I'm perfectly aware of all you said above but my parents would worry more about mental health problems as they would feel there's less they could do to help.

sullivlo

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Yes I am aware of all that but I'm talking about what I would and wouldn't tell my parents, not what constitutes as a health problem.

I said PHYSICAL medical problems to differentiate between what I would and wouldn't tell them. Two of my siblings had mental health problems (anorexia and depression) and I saw how worried my dad was about them as he couldn't simply call a doctor and "fix" them as easily as a broken leg, for example. I think people feel more helpless when someone they love has mental health problems as it isn't as simple as taking a pill or undergoing an operation.

I'm perfectly aware of all you said above but my parents would worry more about mental health problems as they would feel there's less they could do to help.

Oh I know. It wasn't intentionally directed at you. I guess it was just a general comment on how people perceive what should and shouldn't be said to parents / people.

Mint Sauce

Of course I'm in bed alone Mum.

Legs.Eleven

sullivlo wrote: »

Oh I know. It wasn't intentionally directed at you. I guess it was just a general comment on how people perceive what should and shouldn't be said to parents / people.

You're right. You do have to admit that mental health problems might be more worrying for a parent though than a broken leg, for example. It'd certainly worry me more.

Mint Sauce

That I walked into a door.

sullivlo

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

You're right. You do have to admit that mental health problems might be more worrying for a parent though than a broken leg, for example. It'd certainly worry me more.

Well with a broken leg you know that with a cast, crutches and rest, the bone will eventually heal. With mental health issues, like other chronic long term illnesses, there is no quick fix. What works for one person may not work for everyone. Each case of mental illness needs to be taken as a standalone case - two people with depression will fare very differently in terms of which approach works best to aid their symptoms. For some, therapy works wonders. For others, therapy is quackdackery and, in their eyes, should be avoided. There is simply no "gold standard" or "one size fits all" treatment for psychiatric illness. That scares me, and no doubt it scares the feck out of most parents!!

Lads, this isn't a thread about mental health, it's a light hearted thread about lies you've told your parents, can we please move on.

Zen65

whirlpool wrote: »

What is the biggest lie you've told your parents as an adult?

"No Mum, you're not dying, go to sleep, it'll be fine"

Cupcake_Crisis

I used to be awful to lying to them, about where I was, what I was up to, who I was with. But the older I get the more I'm realising that they're actually, my mam in particular, really liberal open minded people. They probably wouldn't have given a toss about half the things I deemed necessary to lie about!!

--LOS--

I used to temp in the CS during the summer, the last time I just couldn't take it anymore and I quit the job a few hours into the day, never told them, stayed in Dublin for the summer :eek: