Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

CZ 453

GeneralC wrote: »

Well, I don't have many friends, and live a pretty much isolated life now that I dropped out of college. I attend the gym daily, which is my only source of really getting out of place I am living. So I just find myself spending 2/3 hours in the gym, going more for the social aspect (and health) benefits.

At least when I was in college, I was forced to interact with people, which is good. I would love to have a proper circle of friends, without sounding cheesy, who do normal guy stuff, like watch sports, hang out, go for food, beer (even though I don't drink) etc.. I think if I had a close bunch of friends, it would do me the world of good. I do have friends, but we're not close, rarely meet up etc.

What happened there?

GeneralC

CZ 453 wrote: »

What happened there?

People get wrapped up in their own lives (college, partners) etc..

I suppose I didn't make much effort either tbh

GeneralC

If the travelling thing doesn't go ahead, my back-up plan is to intern for a few months somewhere, un-paid and part-time. I have applied to many companies, but no reply. I want to build up experience, and get out of the flat, so I thought the internship would the route to go down.

masonchat

GeneralC wrote: »

I haven't tried it myself, but have heard from people who have tried it, and it didn't work for them. However, that's not to say it won't work for you!

Have you talked to your GP about it? What advice has he given you? Have you tried CBT?

Hi no i havent talked to gp about it yet or tried cbt , i am currently in and out of hospital with anxiety , not good times

Hugo Stiglitz

GeneralC wrote: »

People get wrapped up in their own lives (college, partners) etc..

I suppose I didn't make much effort either tbh

Largely the same here. Becoming somewhat reclusive didn't help this either!

GeneralC

masonchat wrote: »

Hi no i havent talked to gp about it yet or tried cbt , i am currently in and out of hospital with anxiety , not good times

First step is go and talk to your GP. Suggest CBT to him/her.

Like many people, I have been in and out with anxiety/panic attacks. What did the hospital suggest?

Try doing some yoga and deep breathing (if you have a smart phone download the app 'Head Space'). Walking/Jogging is also excellent. This will provide some relief.

GeneralC

CZ 453 wrote: »

If you're on social welfare it'll help to get an internship. There are a load of them being advertised

I have applied to many of them over the last 2 weeks, with follow-up emails, and no reply. Fingers crossed I get something soon, I need it!

What are you going to be studying in Sept.? credit to you going back and doing something to benefit yourself.

Roquentin

i think this whole friendship and relationship thingy is over emphasized. im not saying its bad but i think it gets over hyped. From early on we are almost told that in order to be happy you have to have a partner and friends. I think its just what society demands and then when people dont achieve what they should they get down.

i myself can count the number of friends i have with one hand. i rarely see them because they are working and in college. i see some people who say they have hundreds of friends. I doubt that. there is friendship and true friendship and they are different.

when i was in college for instance. everyone was "friends" with each other but they werent really. they were more acquaintances because they would all talk behind each others backs. same with when i worked last. there was a lot of gossip about this and that. no wonder im alone.

GeneralC

Roquentin wrote: »

i think this whole friendship and relationship thingy is over emphasized. im not saying its bad but i think it gets over hyped. From early on we are almost told that in order to be happy you have to have a partner and friends. I think its just what society demands and then when people dont achieve what they should they get down.

i myself can count the number of friends i have with one hand. i rarely see them because they are working and in college. i see some people who say they have hundreds of friends. I doubt that. there is friendship and true friendship and they are different.

when i was in college for instance. everyone was "friends" with each other but they werent really. they were more acquaintances because they would all talk behind each others backs. same with when i worked last. there was a lot of gossip about this and that. no wonder im alone.

Excellent point. It was the same for early childhood, we're forced to make 'friends' with the person next to you in class etc...

Not everyone is going to get along, that's life, so I see your point re:work/college.

I think modern society has changed us as people. You're seen as almost not 'cool' if you don't have 1,000 friends on FB, complete rubbish! I would much rather 2/3 solid, dependable, honest friends, who I can have the banter with.

Hugo Stiglitz

Roquentin wrote: »

i think this whole friendship and relationship thingy is over emphasized. im not saying its bad but i think it gets over hyped. From early on we are almost told that in order to be happy you have to have a partner and friends. I think its just what society demands and then when people dont achieve what they should they get down.

i myself can count the number of friends i have with one hand. i rarely see them because they are working and in college. i see some people who say they have hundreds of friends. I doubt that. there is friendship and true friendship and they are different.

when i was in college for instance. everyone was "friends" with each other but they werent really. they were more acquaintances because they would all talk behind each others backs. same with when i worked last. there was a lot of gossip about this and that. no wonder im alone.

GeneralC wrote: »

Excellent point. It was the same for early childhood, we're forced to make 'friends' with the person next to you in class etc...

Not everyone is going to get along, that's life, so I see your point re:work/college.

I think modern society has changed us as people. You're seen as almost not 'cool' if you don't have 1,000 friends on FB, complete rubbish! I would much rather 2/3 solid, dependable, honest friends, who I can have the banter with.

There some good points made in both of those posts.

Some aspects of my personality rather like the loner lifestyle I currently live. That being said though, loneliness can strike at times and it is not an pleasant emotion.

Hugo Stiglitz

We near the start of another week. Anyone have anything exciting planned?

Call Me Jimmy

Re: Friends and relationships, I think you just miss out on the biological positives of having relationships. Same way if you don't exercise enough you miss out on the endorphins. It isn't to say that someone can't be happy or content without them but imo either is a big loss.

scrimshanker

I'm already regretting the decision to go to the doctor tomorrow I really want to back out. I had a good day today with very little anxiety so now I'm thinking what was I making such a big deal about all of this over? The reality of going in there is also hitting me. The whole thing about going to the doctor is actually raising my anxiety levels far more than not going. I'm going to look like an idiot sitting there perfectly healthy giving out about anxiety (if I can get the words out). Ugh. Terrifying if I'm honest.

Hugo Stiglitz

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Re: Friends and relationships, I think you just miss out on the biological positives of having relationships. Same way if you don't exercise enough you miss out on the endorphins. It isn't to say that someone can't be happy or content without them but imo either is a big loss.

Yeah I feel it is a big loss too. Lack of friends generally seems to mean not having that special someone either.

scrimshanker wrote: »

I'm already regretting the decision to go to the doctor tomorrow I really want to back out. I had a good day today with very little anxiety so now I'm thinking what was I making such a big deal about all of this over? The reality of going in there is also hitting me. The whole thing about going to the doctor is actually raising my anxiety levels far more than not going. I'm going to look like an idiot sitting there perfectly healthy giving out about anxiety (if I can get the words out). Ugh. Terrifying if I'm honest.

You can do it Scrimshanker. It might be hard to do but it'll be worth in the longrun to tackle it now.

GeneralC

scrimshanker wrote: »

I'm already regretting the decision to go to the doctor tomorrow I really want to back out. I had a good day today with very little anxiety so now I'm thinking what was I making such a big deal about all of this over? The reality of going in there is also hitting me. The whole thing about going to the doctor is actually raising my anxiety levels far more than not going. I'm going to look like an idiot sitting there perfectly healthy giving out about anxiety (if I can get the words out). Ugh. Terrifying if I'm honest.

Definitely go. The appointment is already made, so half the work is done, all you got to do is make your way down. Get his/her opinion anyway.

scrimshanker

Appointment isn't made, it's walk in and they're closed all weekend so hadn't the opportunity to make an appointment. There's also a risk that I won't get the GP I want to see...

GeneralC

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Re: Friends and relationships, I think you just miss out on the biological positives of having relationships. Same way if you don't exercise enough you miss out on the endorphins. It isn't to say that someone can't be happy or content without them but imo either is a big loss.

I agree. It's important to have someone there for you as you go through such a hard time. It makes you feel less isolated alone imo.

GeneralC

scrimshanker wrote: »

Appointment isn't made, it's walk in and they're closed all weekend so hadn't the opportunity to make an appointment. There's also a risk that I won't get the GP I want to see...

Tell the reception you're willing to wait for the GP you want to see.

scrimshanker

GeneralC wrote: »

Tell the reception you're willing to wait for the GP you want to see.

Thanks, hadn't thought of that. The only worry though is the other GP knows me well, and is too friendly with my parents (hence why I can't go to him) so if he sees me there he'll probably try to see me quickly. The woman on reception also completely terrifies me. This is going to be awful

I so don't want to go. I know I need to and I know I'm just coming up with any excuse under the sun to not go because I really, really don't want to. I know I should though. Will let you all know how I get on. Give out to me if I don't go.

Gremlinertia

Scrim, if it helps any bit I can tell you that I was almost speechless with nerves the first time I went to see my doc. What I'd done though was written down points about myself that I'd noticed or people had commented on.. Because I couldn't get a word out the doc read this and we managed a brief conversation about things.. Really got the ball rolling for me..

scrimshanker

Somehow actually managed it. Got so worked up in the waiting room I was convinced I was going to faint when I stood up. Then couldn't speak when I was asked what's wrong so good thing it was written down. Tbh, couldn't even manage to explain any of my bullet points but I think in itself that may have given him the general picture. Lexapro it is... And encouragement to see someone. Hmm.

GeneralC

scrimshanker wrote: »

Somehow actually managed it. Got so worked up in the waiting room I was convinced I was going to faint when I stood up. Then couldn't speak when I was asked what's wrong so good thing it was written down. Tbh, couldn't even manage to explain any of my bullet points but I think in itself that may have given him the general picture. Lexapro it is... And encouragement to see someone. Hmm.

He prescribed you Lexapro straight off the bat without discussing a non-medication route to go down?

guitarzero

http://www.ctvnews.ca/health/three-minutes-of-theta-burst-therapy-can-help-conquer-depression-1.2205080

spottybananas

scrimshanker wrote: »

Somehow actually managed it. Got so worked up in the waiting room I was convinced I was going to faint when I stood up. Then couldn't speak when I was asked what's wrong so good thing it was written down. Tbh, couldn't even manage to explain any of my bullet points but I think in itself that may have given him the general picture. Lexapro it is... And encouragement to see someone. Hmm.

I read this thread from time to time but never post, am feeling very anxious and stressed today for no good reason so just popping in.

That doesn't sound too bad Scrimshanker, fair play for sticking it out. I once got up the courage to go to the doctor about my anxiety and other issues, I wrote them all down in bullet points so that I could go into detail easily and not forget or back out. As I read about halfway through them the doctor basically waved his hand and dismissed it all, stopped me talking, and told me that I was fine, I just needed to relax He patronisingly patted me on the shoulder and I left, had to pay stupid money, went home to bed convinced I was imagining it all. I stayed in bed until the next morning and promptly had my first panic attack when I woke up I obviously never went back to him, but my God 5 years later I'm still angry at how he treated me.

scrimshanker

GeneralC wrote: »

He prescribed you Lexapro straight off the bat without discussing a non-medication route to go down?

Why? Is there something wrong with doing that? I didn't think he would prescribe if it was the wrong course of action.. He did strongly recommend seeing someone, which I will think about. God now I don't know

Hugo Stiglitz

spottybananas wrote: »

I read this thread from time to time but never post, am feeling very anxious and stressed today for no good reason so just popping in.

That doesn't sound too bad Scrimshanker, fair play for sticking it out. I once got up the courage to go to the doctor about my anxiety and other issues, I wrote them all down in bullet points so that I could go into detail easily and not forget or back out. As I read about halfway through them the doctor basically waved his hand and dismissed it all, stopped me talking, and told me that I was fine, I just needed to relax He patronisingly patted me on the shoulder and I left, had to pay stupid money, went home to bed convinced I was imagining it all. I stayed in bed until the next morning and promptly had my first panic attack when I woke up I obviously never went back to him, but my God 5 years later I'm still angry at how he treated me.

That's horrible SB

scrimshanker

God spottybananas, that must have been so tough.. I can't imagine how awful that must have felt for you. It's so scary working up the courage to go to the doctor, but to then be dismissed out of hand? You poor thing

spottybananas

scrimshanker wrote: »

God spottybananas, that must have been so tough.. I can't imagine how awful that must have felt for you. It's so scary working up the courage to go to the doctor, but to then be dismissed out of hand? You poor thing

Yeah, it was pretty awful. I remember walking out thinking "right then, so a doctor has said I'm fine, so I am just imagining it, I'm losing my mind, great". I ended up going home (3+ hours drive which was no mean feat in my state) to my gp there, who took it all very seriously, sat and chatted with me for an hour with the phone off the hook. He realised there was actually a physical ailment causing some of my problems (which the other doctor hadn't even considered/thought to check), but both this and the anxiety were caused by a work situation. He gave me some Xanax to get me through the next few days if I needed them, ended up not using them. He also gave me lots of info on counsellors and said he could make an emergency appointment if necessary, such a lovely man.

At the time that did sort most of my problems, except for those that could only be fixed by leaving my job. I was fine for a long time, but in the past 1-2 years the anxiety has flared up much worse, I haven't gotten any help for it really, or told anyone. I haven't had a panic attack but come very, very close to it a lot of days. The thing is I can really rationally see when it happens, pretty much what triggers it, but I just can't stop it happening. My body just overreacts to the smallest stresses now, like I have no filter between mild warranted alertness and full blown "a meteor has struck" panic.

I'm babbling now...

cloudatlas

Recent events have made me determined to go for CBT session therapy just waiting for the therapist to get back to me.

Hugo Stiglitz

cloudatlas wrote: »

Recent events have made me determined to go for CBT session therapy just waiting for the therapist to get back to me.

Anything you wanna get off your chest here friend?