Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

Hugo Stiglitz

GeneralC wrote: »

Friday @ 2.30pm. Even though it's an internship, I am going to do my homework on this area over the next few days.

How are you feeling today?

Best of luck in the interview! Yeah best go in with some knowledge about the company, role and industry. I have a feeling you'll be well suited for it man!

GeneralC

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Best of luck in the interview! Yeah best go in with some knowledge about the company, role and industry. I have a feeling you'll be well suited for it man!

Thanks for the support! My only gripe is that it is full-time. Ideally I wanted part-time. After being so long out of work, it may be over whelming

Hugo Stiglitz

GeneralC wrote: »

After being so long out of work, it may be over whelming

I can totally relate to that man, I'd be feeling the very same.

scrimshanker

GeneralC wrote: »

Friday @ 2.30pm. Even though it's an internship, I am going to do my homework on this area over the next few days.

Best of luck Hope it goes really well for you. I started a 6 month job around this time last year. Full time after being off for a long time. It was difficult but as was pointed out to me, EVERYONE finds it hard to get used to working full time again.

I was worried earlier that the meds I started yesterday aren't going to work on me, that for some reason I'd be immune to them or something.. But the side effects are starting to appear so hopefully means they will work. Can't swallow properly today. Bit unpleasant. Hoping this goes away sharpish...

GeneralC

scrimshanker wrote: »

Best of luck Hope it goes really well for you. I started a 6 month job around this time last year. Full time after being off for a long time. It was difficult but as was pointed out to me, EVERYONE finds it hard to get used to working full time again.

I was worried earlier that the meds I started yesterday aren't going to work on me, that for some reason I'd be immune to them or something.. But the side effects are starting to appear so hopefully means they will work. Can't swallow properly today. Bit unpleasant. Hoping this goes away sharpish...

Is it one tablet a day scrimshanker? would it be classified as a 'heavy' dose? That does unpleasant, are you able to eat/drink? Fingers crossed it goes away fast!

scrimshanker

Yeah, just one 10mg tablet a day. Don't think it's a heavy dose. I can eat and drink, just my throat is getting really dry and it's hard to swallow when I'm not drinking. Could be worse, I guess. At least I'm not physically ill with it. Hoping the benefits outweigh this when they kick in though

GeneralC

I would suggest to make sure you're drinking plenty of fluids, more than you usually would anyway.

scrimshanker

Yeah I think sipping lots of water might help. Stupidly I scoured the internet til I found something saying the side effects never go away if they aren't just nausea. Should know better than to go doing that.

alaskayoung

scrimshanker wrote: »

Yeah, just one 10mg tablet a day. Don't think it's a heavy dose. I can eat and drink, just my throat is getting really dry and it's hard to swallow when I'm not drinking. Could be worse, I guess. At least I'm not physically ill with it. Hoping the benefits outweigh this when they kick in though

I never got the dry mouth on Lexapro but I got it on Prozac and it went away after about 2 or 3 weeks. I did get really weird jaw tension on it though and constantly found myself clenching my teeth. If you find this, I'd suggest a mouth guard when you're sleeping because your teeth can get really painful :P
It has a very fast onset compared to other antidepressants which usually take 6-8 weeks. You should see an improvement pretty soon but that means side effects kick in pretty fast too. Most of them go away after a few weeks at most though or at least reduce in severity. Hope it works out for you!

scrimshanker

alaskayoung wrote: »

I never got the dry mouth on Lexapro but I got it on Prozac and it went away after about 2 or 3 weeks. I did get really weird jaw tension on it though and constantly found myself clenching my teeth. If you find this, I'd suggest a mouth guard when you're sleeping because your teeth can get really painful :P
It has a very fast onset compared to other antidepressants which usually take 6-8 weeks. You should see an improvement pretty soon but that means side effects kick in pretty fast too. Most of them go away after a few weeks at most though or at least reduce in severity. Hope it works out for you!

Thanks , it's only when you pointed it out I noticed my jaw is completely clenched... May explain the headache :rolleyes:

carzony

i'v been reading about a few medications available.. lexapro does seem the best and most effective according to my research. i'v a speech to do and have to be in on tuesday so hopelly i'll get somthing by then


how was everyone today anyway? jesus this thread is great...

GeneralC

carzony wrote: »

i'v been reading about a few medications available.. lexapro does seem the best and most effective according to my research. i'v a speech to do and have to be in on tuesday so hopelly i'll get somthing by then


how was everyone today anyway? jesus this thread is great...

I had a funny all day. Two companies got to me re:internships. Then a friend aI was talking about careers etc told me to follow something I am actually passionate about instead of doing something that just fits the bill. If I was to take his advice it would mean going down a totally different career path from business/media to a more science/medical route but I just feel too old now to be doing that sort of thing.

Ultimately, it would mean an extra 2 years of college vs. 1 year, but in area that won't cause me as much as much stress, as I feel working in an office all day will drive me nuts and cause me to become very anxious!

greenfrogs

GeneralC if money isn't an issue for attending 2 years of college rather than one then make your decision based on what your passionate about. Also your friend seems very kind and caring towards you. If theinternship is in an area that just fits the bill then maybe try it and see how you feel after a few months.

Hugo Stiglitz

GC, this could be a good opportunity to get your life going in a very good direction.

GeneralC

Ah I dunno, I think going from a business/media background to a medical route is a bit nuts!

So here's the dilemma:

1. Internship (un-paid for 9mths) in a company in an area I 'kinda' am interested in, then returning to an already ***paid*** masters in business in Sept. 2015.

Or

2. Go the medical route, which I need to sit the GAMSAT (takes place in 6 weeks) and I have no science knowledge, and I have to place in the top 12 to obtain a place on the programme in Sept. 2015, which is Limerick btw! Oh, and it costs 18k in total (9k a year!). It also means the 6k I put down (my life savings) to the business masters will be refunded!

Advice? ha I think option two is just a fantasy tbh.

Drumpot

There was a recent sports story (today) on the RTE website about Darren O'Sullivan (Kerry GAA footballer) choosing to quit his job, so he can focus on getting fit for his inter county "career".

A few people commented that he was mad to put a hobby ahead of his career. I shared a different aspect that I feel gets overlooked by people who are far too focused on the rat race at the expense of exciting life opportunities.

In short, I think O'Sullivan is 1000000% correct to prioritise his GAA career over his work career. He appears to have the financial means to survive prudently. He will be lucky if he gets 5 more years playing on front of thousands of people each summer, in a sport he loves. Why in the name of god would anybody choose a career over an opportunity like that is beyond me. But it highlighted , for me, a very unhealthy attitude that exists in society where being prudent and focusing on career is expected over all else.

Life is for living in the now and its something that has taken me years to understand. I believe that I, like many people, prioritised the wrong things in life. Constantly worrying about my education, my work experience and what opportunities I would get in the future etc.

Fear of taking a risk (something you enjoy that may not be as financially rewarding) prevented me from doing or trying career paths that I might actually enjoy and be better at.

Its funny because looking back on my life, I chose what would be considered the more prudent path - education, work experience in an industry that has good prospects. On paper, people would look at it and say "well done, you did what most prudent people would do". But I was desperately unhappy. My decision to do what was expected of me contributed to my unhappiness.

Remember, successful (financially/academically) people can be depressed. I am not saying that following a prudent path is wrong, but stressing about working hard in an industry/profession that you don't like, simply because its whats expected of you from society, was something that never sat well with me.

I still do the same job but I am lucky that I work for myself. I can acknowledge the positives of choosing the prudent path but reflect on the fact that I didn't ever dream big or allow myself to consider a profession I enjoyed.

I try to encourage my children to dream big and to explore subjects they enjoy. I believe the saying "if you work in a job you love you will never work a day in your life" and I would much rather that my children have a frugle standard of living, but a more balanced happy feeling towards life.

I find myself constantly at odds in a world that constantly tries to tell me that I should want more. I should want to look better, I should want the newest car/phone/technology, I should never be happy with what I have, I should always endeavour to have more.

CBT has helped me to learn to accept that this is the way the world is and instead of fighting against it (or hating it), I can observe the world and try to focus on what sort of life I want to build in it. I don't have to like the way the world is, to find a peace and happiness that doesn't rely on things like my job or financial situation to pick me up. In essence, my mind no longer laments what happened in the past, no longer fears the future. My mind is now free to enjoy what I have now and its a life I could never of imagined a couple of years ago.

kronsington

Reverted to my old ways yesterday.. Got some bad need the work, bought a **** load of junk food, ate it, vomited and then sat in the bath as the shower poured on me for about 30 mins. I was mindful of my behaviour and how ridiculous it looked. I've been trying mindfulness, meditation ad mind body relaxation and other coping methods for bad anxiety and while They've been helpful , too often I find myself falling to pieces

Drumpot

kronsington wrote: »

Reverted to my old ways yesterday.. Got some bad need the work, bought a **** load of junk food, ate it, vomited and then sat in the bath as the shower poured on me for about 30 mins. I was mindful of my behaviour and how ridiculous it looked. I've been trying mindfulness, meditation ad mind body relaxation and other coping methods for bad anxiety and while They've been helpful , too often I find myself falling to pieces

Whats most important from your post is that you are mindful of your behaviour. Remember, these tools like meditation or exercise etc wont always work and for me, reflecting on these kind of days helps me learn more about my behaviour and reactions to life situations.

Somebody posted a load of great ideas and techniques to help people feel better and get out of themselves. http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=94011596&postcount=3923

These are good tools but without proper training/therapy, they are simply just patchwork things that people can use to relieve some of the stresses of life.

I cant speak about you personally, but I have friends/family around me who tried similar therapies to me and they didn't get the same results. They use exercise and some of the techniques mentioned in the post I linked above (including meditation) but they only get momentary relief.

What held me back and what I see holding back other people similar to me, is not getting proper guidance with regards to mindfulness and councelling. Picking and choosing bits of advice and applying it as it suits instead of being guided by an independent, objective professional who will make sure its done right.

A programme for living is the things I learned, not just some ways of getting momentary relief. It may sound bad but in many cases, including my own, its peoples egos that can be a huge barrier to learning new things. I had to learn to be able to see it. Its amazing when I speak with people stuck at a certain point in rehabilitation whos life is so difficult and yet they persist with using their own opinion on whether or not something will work. "Oh I don't think that will work for me, I tried it once and didn't like it" or "that's not what I need".

I believe that many people, like myself, who suffer grave pain from anxiety or depression aren't in a position to say what is the best course of action for ourselves. We might actually say "Yeh, I cant do this on my own", but then when action would make a difference "Oh I wouldn't be comfortable with that" prevents us from taking the steps and making the changes to improve our condition.

This is not meant to be insulting, I speak from experience , not from an ivory tower. I was and am in the trenches with people suffering from mental health issues and the only difference between me and most people posting is that I surrendered my will to a professional and did pretty much everything they told me to do without question. I committed to a programme and followed it through. I am still learning things daily, working with like minded people who need my help and whom I can learn things from.

Roquentin

“There is no reality except the one contained within us. That is why so many people live such an unreal life. They take the images outside of them for reality and never allow the world within to assert itself.”
― Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf

GeneralC

kronsington wrote: »

Reverted to my old ways yesterday.. Got some bad need the work, bought a **** load of junk food, ate it, vomited and then sat in the bath as the shower poured on me for about 30 mins. I was mindful of my behaviour and how ridiculous it looked. I've been trying mindfulness, meditation ad mind body relaxation and other coping methods for bad anxiety and while They've been helpful , too often I find myself falling to pieces

Hope you're ok now.

fr336

Gremlinertia

Right. Meeting with psychologist to discuss what options I have from here.. It's in about twelve hours. Going to tidy up the stuff I've scribbled down in case I can't talk again. I feel like this could be a very critical appointment, so I'm a bit of a wreck already. Concentrating on breathing as much as I can but I've held it a few times now. Jaws starting to go too. The muscles in my back are next.. I hope I don't go completely to pieces before this..

scrimshanker

Hi Grem,

Hope your appointment goes well for you today.

scrimshanker

sorry for venting (again), just have to let this out somewhere. In absolute hell today. anxiety completely spiked all over the place, feel like I'm verging on panic the whole time. once again, have heaps to do and have done absolutely nothing other than curl up on the couch all day :-/

GeneralC

scrimshanker wrote: »

sorry for venting (again), just have to let this out somewhere. In absolute hell today. anxiety completely spiked all over the place, feel like I'm verging on panic the whole time. once again, have heaps to do and have done absolutely nothing other than curl up on the couch all day :-/

What about going for a short walk to clear your head? What has brought this sudden panic on? or is there no particular reason?

scrimshanker

No idea what brought it on. Very very keyed up and mood gone through the floor for seemingly no reason. Walk sounds like a good idea in theory...

GeneralC

Try going for a gentle walk around your area. Walking/exercising always helps me when I feel like ****. I always find sitting around doesn't help.

Mars Bar

mg1982

Good one Mars bar. Mine is like a tasmanian devil going off on one inside my head sometimes.

carzony

Visit to the doctor went well folks... got medication, can't remember the name of it now but i'll post when I get home..