Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

Euphoria Intensifies

Drained today. Had a really busy weekend (family wedding) so it's really catching up with me now.

I think it will take me a long time to get over this recent bad spell. I hadn't been managing very well with life anyway before this cause of the bpd, but at least my moods were more stable. It really feels like a lot of layers have been peeled off and I feel a bit stunted or slow or like I've lost a bit of myself. It's hard to describe.

GeneralC

Euphoria Intensifies wrote: »

Drained today. Had a really busy weekend (family wedding) so it's really catching up with me now.

I think it will take me a long time to get over this recent bad spell. I hadn't been managing very well with life anyway before this cause of the bpd, but at least my moods were more stable. It really feels like a lot of layers have been peeled off and I feel a bit stunted or slow or like I've lost a bit of myself. It's hard to describe.

Hope you feel better soon. Are you doing anything to help the bpd?

GeneralC

Absolutely drained today. I went for a walk and couldn't feel my legs, and felt mentally strained/broken. Also, can't stop eating today, literally!

greenfrogs

Euphoria Intensifies wrote: »

Drained today. Had a really busy weekend (family wedding) so it's really catching up with me now.

I think it will take me a long time to get over this recent bad spell. I hadn't been managing very well with life anyway before this cause of the bpd, but at least my moods were more stable. It really feels like a lot of layers have been peeled off and I feel a bit stunted or slow or like I've lost a bit of myself. It's hard to describe.

I think I get what you mean. It's like you don't really know who you anymore. It takes time to recover after a hard spell. Just be good to yourself and give yourself a break.

I absolutely hate weddings. They are so long and I hate the social aspect of them. Last year I had 2 weddings. One just a week before I was diagnosed with mental health issues. And one a few weeks later. They were so tough. I just wanted to leave and go to bed. I have been put off weddings for life.

mg1982

greenfrogs wrote: »

I think I get what you mean. It's like you don't really know who you anymore. It takes time to recover after a hard spell. Just be good to yourself and give yourself a break.

I absolutely hate weddings. They are so long and I hate the social aspect of them. Last year I had 2 weddings. One just a week before I was diagnosed with mental health issues. And one a few weeks later. They were so tough. I just wanted to leave and go to bed. I have been put off weddings for life.

I know what you mean. Weddings are meant to be such joyous occasions but i can never get into the spirit of it when im at one. Same with christmas.

Euphoria Intensifies

I love weddings actually, even though they do take a lot out of you. I do get anxious about them beforehand, but I find them to be good distractions cause there's always somebody to chat to or a song to get up and dance to. And I always end up crying at some point, but that's kinda acceptable at a wedding haha.

GeneralC, I've been seeing a counsellor for about 3 years which has helped a lot with some of the bpd traits, but I'm still pretty bad with self-destructive behaviour, relationships, impulsivity and emotional dysregulation. Hopefully I will be able to work more on combatting those traits when I start DBT. I have a CPN from the local mental health team and am attending the day hospital too, but that's mainly because I've been going through a really bad period of depression (which makes my bpd traits a lot more unmanageable). I'm in the same boat as you today, eating everything around me.

heyday30

mg1982 wrote: »

Best of luck with that heyday. Eating well can make a big difference to our mental health.

Thank you mg. I bought one of those nutri bullets. I'm doing a detox. Blended fruits n veg. AActually not as bad as I thought... taste wise. And I actually feel full!

More of a nutrition aid. Weight loss be a great bonus But I just want to feel healthy. My body is under pressure.

efb

Can't sleep at night then end up
Sleeping all day!!!

greenfrogs

heyday30 wrote: »

Thank you mg. I bought one of those nutri bullets. I'm doing a detox. Blended fruits n veg. AActually not as bad as I thought... taste wise. And I actually feel full!

More of a nutrition aid. Weight loss be a great bonus But I just want to feel healthy. My body is under pressure.

I actually feel better when I eat better. I love junk food but I try to limit it. Recently my intake has increased so I might start trying to mage it better. Junk food makes me feel horrible. Probably because I eat far too much of it when I have it. For example I can't have one biscuit instead I have to have 10. Then I feel disgusting and would eat more to feel better.

Best of luck with the detox heyday

mg1982

Fair play for doing it. You know what they say, healthy body healthy mind. Try and get your 5 a day fruit and veg and maybe a 3 mile walk. Could make a big difference.

heyday30

greenfrogs wrote: »

I actually feel better when I eat better. I love junk food but I try to limit it. Recently my intake has increased so I might start trying to mage it better. Junk food makes me feel horrible. Probably because I eat far too much of it when I have it. For example I can't have one biscuit instead I have to have 10. Then I feel disgusting and would eat more to feel better.

Best of luck with the detox heyday

I've no control when I start eating so this fruit n veg shakes will limit that for a bit.

My health is really suffering lately. hoping this will help. One day at a time.

heyday30

mg1982 wrote: »

Fair play for doing it. You know what they say, healthy body healthy mind. Try and get your 5 a day fruit and veg and maybe a 3 mile walk. Could make a big difference.

I will be getting my 5 a day from the shakes. The exercise will come later

Hugo Stiglitz

Hope it all turns out ok there H

heyday30

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Hope it all turns out ok there H

Ta Hugo. We shall see.

Call Me Jimmy

You're onto something with the smoothies (I assume) heydey, I was brought up on the worst diet imagine, wouldn't have had a fruit or anything like that till in my 20s, find most things good for me hard to stomach but the smoothies I make are delicious and healthy.

Fair play on giving it a shot. I noticed I hit a place where through my body getting a taste of healthy foods it's desire for unhealthy **** went down dramatically. Now that's not all the time, and don't focus too much on any blow-outs. The body will digest them and they'll be gone soon enough. Best of luck

greenfrogs

heyday30 wrote: »

I've no control when I start eating so this fruit n veg shakes will limit that for a bit.

My health is really suffering lately. hoping this will help. One day at a time.

I have to stick to a diet plan for my ibs. Honestly it has made such a difference to my everyday life. I still have a few issues. But before I used suffer everyday from eating the wrong foods. It really affects your mood. Now I feel so good. I feel so much better both physically and mentally.

I hope you have success with this because feeling physically unwell is just not nice. It really adds your problems. Like you said take it day by day. If you happen to slip of the wagon then jump right back on.

heyday30

Thanks a lot for all the positive support.

carzony

Healthy diets are tough to stick to though.. I've always had a bad diet but I do believe veg, fruits could make depression/anxiety less of a factor....

How is the sleeping patterns lads? as you can probably tell by my late (or should that be early) post mine isnt great lol......

stinkle

Am on a bit of a health kick myself too, good to hear others are similar!!! The smoothies are a great idea Jimmy. Small things with me really - am making sure to have breakfast every morning and take some supplements too at the same time, one is iron and the other is folic acid (B vitamin complex really), both of which often come back as low for me when I get bloods done. I know B vitamins are marketed as stress relieving but I dunno if there;s truth in that. I am feeling ok though - am fairly "normal" and on an even keel, by which I mean not much anxiety to report but also I wasnt doing my usual "energy burst-must take on the world-everything needs to be perfect yesterday" routine that sometimes happens. I just enjoyed the weekend for what it was.

Had a weird low earlier though, wasnt mad busy in work so I think I just felt a bit directionless on this Monday. Like, could have done LOADS if Id put my mind to it but didnt. I was excited by some work productivity last week but it doesnt look so good today. Dunno why I got so meh about it, I have other things to keep busy with later this week, and its still early days even if Im not making great progress. Was weirdly freaked out by sending an email today, something I was putting off for a few days now. Weird.

Home now and relaxing anyway. Off to doc tomorow too, I intend to ask about CBT and if I can be referred.

mg1982

heyday30 wrote: »

I will be getting my 5 a day from the shakes. The exercise will come later

The thing with exercise is you have to start of slow and build it up gradually. No point running 5km from the start. I find the walking great and good for the mind. I'm crap at jogging. Also yoga is great too and there's some good yoga videos on YouTube.

norwegianwood

My last set of college exams are starting on Monday and normally I'm ok about that kind of stuff but this time around I just can't study, I'm so anxious, can't sleep, keep having panic attacks, it's getting really hard.

scrimshanker

norwegianwood wrote: »

My last set of college exams are starting on Monday and normally I'm ok about that kind of stuff but this time around I just can't study, I'm so anxious, can't sleep, keep having panic attacks, it's getting really hard.

Go to your doc. He might prescribe an anxiolytic to help you get over the worst of it, and can also write a letter stating that you're suffering from extreme anxiety that you can submit as extenuating circumstances.

Roquentin

scrimshanker wrote: »

Go to your doc. He might prescribe an anxiolytic to help you get over the worst of it, and can also write a letter stating that you're suffering from extreme anxiety that you can submit as extenuating circumstances.

on another forum, they were saying that doctors were over prescribing anti-anxiety meds for college students. just shows how stressful college is.

life is great but living is painful

scrimshanker

I saw that thread actually, I think they were mainly focusing on performance enhancing drugs. I think the presumption that everyone's on them just to get an edge is unfair, certainly with benzos you practically have to sell your soul and they're only indicated for severe anxiety. My own doc didn't even mention them until after I'd been on SSRIs (and had the dose increased) and tried therapy for a couple of months. I'm taking them purely in the hope of minimizing the damage my anxiety is going to do to my grades. Because it is wrecking my ability to learn!

Also, what happened to boards? Why is it all weird???

Roquentin

scrimshanker wrote: »

I saw that thread actually, I think they were mainly focusing on performance enhancing drugs. I think the presumption that everyone's on them just to get an edge is unfair, certainly with benzos you practically have to sell your soul and they're only indicated for severe anxiety. My own doc didn't even mention them until after I'd been on SSRIs (and had the dose increased) and tried therapy for a couple of months. I'm taking them purely in the hope of minimizing the damage my anxiety is going to do to my grades. Because it is wrecking my ability to learn!

Also, what happened to boards? Why is it all weird???

something to do with maintenance work. they changed it all around.

scrimshanker

Ugh, my head won't leave me alone. Keep getting very intrusive thoughts that won't go away about killing myself I'm not suicidal but I can't make myself stop thinking about killing myself.

mg1982

scrimshanker wrote: »

Ugh, my head won't leave me alone. Keep getting very intrusive thoughts that won't go away about killing myself I'm not suicidal but I can't make myself stop thinking about killing myself.

There hard to deal with scrim. I have them most days and especially when im feeling bad, but on the bad days suicidal thoughts can be a source of comfort for me. Scary i know.

greenfrogs

That sounds tough guys. Sometimes when I find myself in a scenic place with water I find myself thinking how easy it would be just to walk in. It freaks me out because one second I'm thinking this is such a beautiful place and the next I'm thinking about walking in. Very unnerving. Is that normal?

scrimshanker

greenfrogs wrote: »

That sounds tough guys. Sometimes when I find myself in a scenic place with water I find myself thinking how easy it would be just to walk in. It freaks me out because one second I'm thinking this is such a beautiful place and the next I'm thinking about walking in. Very unnerving. Is that normal?

Depends on what you mean by normal, gf. I'd say it's normal enough among some people, but I'm not convinced it's healthy, if that's what you mean by normal. But I get what you mean. I have a surgical scalpel here at home and sometimes I just think it would be so easy to just slice the blood vessels out of my arm...

Hugo Stiglitz

scrimshanker wrote: »

Ugh, my head won't leave me alone. Keep getting very intrusive thoughts that won't go away about killing myself I'm not suicidal but I can't make myself stop thinking about killing myself.

You're not alone there Scrim. I get suicide ideation frequently, however I wouldn't call myself suicidal either. That being said, I know it's far from normal thinking and it can be a little upsetting at times.