Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

Gremlinertia

Welcome Kaylami, it's very destabilising when your therapist/psych doctor is changed however any new person coming into the role who is half decent at their job will have read up your file.. You will feel a bit like you're repeating yourself but try to give them a chance..

As for the increased worry etc, can you attend your gp to discuss it and perhaps plan some way to combat it?.

alaskayoung

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

I only ever let really let people I don't know that I'm a nervous person. I don't let them know that I'm full on depressed and anxious. I'm sure some people would somehow try to use that against you.

Do you find that you get hassle from people who say that so it's easy to just get up and get out there instead of wasting the weekend?

Oh God I'm not talking about people I don't know very well, merely immediate family members and very close friends. I don't even hint about anything to anybody else :P

I wouldn't go as far as saying I get hassle from people, well maybe my parents but maybe just more of a lack of empathy.

greenfrogs

Do you ever wish that you could delete a memory entirely from your brain. I keep going over and over one particular situation in my head. I am sick of it. I am sick of thinking of this person. Why can't I move on?

heyday30

greenfrogs wrote: »

Do you ever wish that you could delete a memory entirely from your brain. I keep going over and over one particular situation in my head. I am sick of it. I am sick of thinking of this person. Why can't I move on?

Have you talked this situation with this person out with a therapist or counsellor.

greenfrogs

heyday30 wrote: »

Have you talked this situation with this person out with a therapist or counsellor.

Yes I have spent so much time and energy talking about it. It's not a traumatic event or anything. Just something I can't let go.

Euphoria Intensifies

Why do you think you can't let go of it GF? Is there something about it that reminds you of other situations? Is focusing on this particular incident a coping mechanism for you?

greenfrogs

Euphoria Intensifies wrote: »

Why do you think you can't let go of it GF? Is there something about it that reminds you of other situations? Is focusing on this particular incident a coping mechanism for you?

The situation is about how a guy I was friends with cut me off from his life. To be fair I was acting irrationally, and he wasn't the most understanding. He has blocked me on Facebook and whatapp. So I keep checking these to see if i'm still blocked. Then I check his fb using a different account. Then I keep thinking we will run into each other as we have mutual friends but I think he is avoiding me. I'm just upsetting myself and rubbing salt on the wound. Why can't I let this go. It sounds so trivial but why is this trivial situation on my mind every single day. I don't think an hour goes by without me thinking about him.

Gremlinertia

Hey Frogs, I think each and every one of us has at least one stumbling block or another, this ex friend sounds like one of yours. If you feel badly obsessed you'll have to tackle it someway. Either by making a pact to not look him up anymore or ask your therapist to "be" him for a few minutes to see exactly what it is you want to say. These are just suggestions of course, hope you manage to get past this..

Kaylami

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Welcome Kaylami, it's very destabilising when your therapist/psych doctor is changed however any new person coming into the role who is half decent at their job will have read up your file.. You will feel a bit like you're repeating yourself but try to give them a chance..

As for the increased worry etc, can you attend your gp to discuss it and perhaps plan some way to combat it?.

I have been attending my gp and they are doing everything they can. Just sometimes it feels like it's not enough you know?

Can't change my meds or go to a higher dose which is a pain.

I guess the new Dr just threw me a little I wasn't expecting it and I turned up for my app. She has very different ideas and way of thinking which is a bit of a shock to the system and I guess could be contributing to the worry issues.

greenfrogs

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hey Frogs, I think each and every one of us has at least one stumbling block or another, this ex friend sounds like one of yours. If you feel badly obsessed you'll have to tackle it someway. Either by making a pact to not look him up anymore or ask your therapist to "be" him for a few minutes to see exactly what it is you want to say. These are just suggestions of course, hope you manage to get past this..

I am badly obsessed. At least I'm not trying to contact him. But, I need to get him out of my mind. I like your second suggestion about the therapist being him. I'm just so frustrated that he thinks I'm a horrible, crazy person. I know I treated him badly. However, it's like I can't accept that he has a negative opinion of me. Maybe I'll just have to move on to dating other guys, rather than focusing on the past. But, maybe I'm jumping from the frying pan into the fire.

I suppose I just have to accept that the entire time I knew him, I was clinically depressed. He can't know the real me because he has never known me as a healthy person. I need to accept what happened and that it wasn't my fault. Even when I explained that to him, he didn't care. Overall, he is not a nice guy. He could of said, I know you are going through a hard, but maybe we shouldn't be friends. I feel that would of made a massive difference. I can't make him do that though.

Gremlinertia

Kaylami wrote: »

I have been attending my gp and they are doing everything they can. Just sometimes it feels like it's not enough you know?

Can't change my meds or go to a higher dose which is a pain.

I guess the new Dr just threw me a little I wasn't expecting it and I turned up for my app. She has very different ideas and way of thinking which is a bit of a shock to the system and I guess could be contributing to the worry issues.

Stay with it, you've come to the right thread for some support. Who knows, new ideas from a fresh doctor's mind may be great for you. Do you keep a notebook just to jot down worries you have that you could bring to next appointment?

Gremlinertia

Frogs, that reminds me of the saying 'you can bring a horse to water but you can't make it drink' it seems this guy has made his mind up.. I know how you feel wanting to let him know you are not that person but he appears to be a stick in the mud. Try figure out what you wanted to say to him and say it to therapist or someone. Pm me if you like.. Hugs..

greenfrogs

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Frogs, that reminds me of the saying 'you can bring a horse to water but you can't make it drink' it seems this guy has made his mind up.. I know how you feel wanting to let him know you are not that person but he appears to be a stick in the mud. Try figure out what you wanted to say to him and say it to therapist or someone. Pm me if you like.. Hugs..

I think I need people to say things like this. He has made up his mind. I think I might write what I want to say and discuss it in my next meeting with my therapist.

I started dbt skills today. I have my fingers and toes crossed that it helps me.

Gremlinertia

greenfrogs wrote: »

I think I need people to say things like this. He has made up his mind. I think I might write what I want to say and discuss it in my next meeting with my therapist.

I started dbt skills today. I have my fingers and toes crossed that it helps me.

Oh brilliant! Dbt will definitely help if you give it a good chance.. I'm terribly cynical and was originally left cold by the idea of mindfulness however over four months in and I'm an advocate for it all now. Not to say it's easy, far from it at times but totally worth it..

greenfrogs

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Oh brilliant! Dbt will definitely help if you give it a good chance.. I'm terribly cynical and was originally left cold by the idea of mindfulness however over four months in and I'm an advocate for it all now. Not to say it's easy, far from it at times but totally worth it..

I am a big believer in therapy. I think cbt has helped me enormously. Hopefully, dbt can build on the progress I have made.

We have started with mindfulness. I definitely need to work on that. My mind always wanders. It nearly always wanders to that guy. Then tonight I got angry for a silly reason and, I got upset about that guy.

However I went for a walk earlier and, I tried to concentrate on my walking, the music I was listening to, my surroundings or my dog. I kept switching between the different things but, I mainly tried to avoiding thinking about random issues. It was a shame I got angry at a situation when I got home.

Gremlinertia

Early days Frogs, but I'm genuinely delighted for you.

greenfrogs

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Early days Frogs, but I'm genuinely delighted for you.

Thanks. I suppose I was thinking I didn't really need dbt, that the doctors thought I was worse than I actually am. However, I know this isn't true. I wouldn't of been offered the course if I didn't require it. Already I am seeing the benefits of dbt. Group therapy will take a bit of adjusting to. It is nice to listen to people experiencing similar problems to you.

GeneralC

I got told today I need another open heart surgery - this will be my third and I am 27

Gremlinertia

GeneralC wrote: »

I got told today I need another open heart surgery - this will be my third and I am 27

Oof that's rough. I feel for you. Have you got people to talk to?. I'm here for pm if you want.. Do you get mental health back up with stuff like this?. Can't imagine how hard that must have been to hear..

GeneralC

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Oof that's rough. I feel for you. Have you got people to talk to?. I'm here for pm if you want.. Do you get mental health back up with stuff like this?. Can't imagine how hard that must have been to hear..

Thank you Grem
The cardiology have two clinically trained nurses to answer any questions, but it's all about procedure and what's going on with the heart. I wouldn't have a 'go to' person for the mental side of it.

greenfrogs

GeneralC wrote: »

I got told today I need another open heart surgery - this will be my third and I am 27

Sorry to hear that.

GeneralC

I would rather have it done tomorrow, get it done and dusted. I remember having to wait a year for my second one and the year was mental torture, such a weight over my head! For me, it provokes so much anxiety it's crippling.

greenfrogs

Yah, I get what you mean. Do you have any idea how long the wait will be?

Gremlinertia

Well always post here when you want, maybe you have a friend you can talk to?. Arrange a weekly meet where you can talk about it though so it's not the topic all the time.. That or seek help within the hospital perhaps.

GeneralC

greenfrogs wrote: »

Yah, I get what you mean. Do you have any idea how long the wait will be?

They have started me on medication, so I reckon 6-9 months. I was told to continue my cycling and jogging everyday.

greenfrogs

Well, at least you can still cycle and jog. Hopefully it will come sooner rather than later.

GeneralC

I feel like crying. On the exterior I look athletic, toned and inside I feel great. I just can't understand how my heart is failing, yet I am getting fitter - cycling everywhere and able to jog for 45 mins.

Not only I am plagued with anxiety, but not I have this **** on top of it.

Gremlinertia

General, I can identify with that a little because as you said it's invisible so people would look at you and never think anything could be up.. I think you could definitely do with seeking out support services so you can do some talk therapy. Hugs from me..

GeneralC

I can't sleep a wink. I keep watching videos on heart surgery.

Gremlinertia

GeneralC wrote: »

I can't sleep a wink. I keep watching videos on heart surgery.

Oh gosh.. You do doctor google too? I'm a demon for it.. Hopefully this initial shock won't be too long with you. It's an awful thing to have weighing on you, and again too. It's awful hard to find positives these times.