Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

CZ 453

guitarzero wrote: »

I had some vanilla ice cream, apple tart and sliced banana 15 mins ago, dont wanna brag or anything..

That's bragging alright. Hot apple tart and cold ice cream=over the counter medication

kronsington

this is the worst ive felt in months.. i feel like the walls are closing in on me.. paranoia, anxiety, irritable. all my probems are magnifying. here in canada alone nearly 6 months, have pretty much nothing to show for it, live in a house with others who im quite sure dont like me, money problems, sick mother in ireland, estranged brother and father in ireland, messed up with that girl i metioned a few posts back.. my head is constantly racing- it will not stop. going out friday night hasnt helped. confided all this in a friend at home who basically called me out for mistakes from my best, spoke to me in a condscending patronizing manner and basically talked down to me. i simply dont know what to do. i am trying to get control of this i need to learn to relax, like myself and not be fixated with what others think of me.

northgirl

kronsington wrote: »

this is the worst ive felt in months.. i feel like the walls are closing in on me.. paranoia, anxiety, irritable. all my probems are magnifying. here in canada alone nearly 6 months, have pretty much nothing to show for it, live in a house with others who im quite sure dont like me, money problems, sick mother in ireland, estranged brother and father in ireland, messed up with that girl i metioned a few posts back.. my head is constantly racing- it will not stop. going out friday night hasnt helped. confided all this in a friend at home who basically called me out for mistakes from my best, spoke to me in a condscending patronizing manner and basically talked down to me. i simply dont know what to do. i am trying to get control of this i need to learn to relax, like myself and not be fixated with what others think of me.

can you talk to anyone closer by kronsington? you've a lot going on there...


feeling similar in terms of walls closing in, awake seriously early with a heart like lead. the effort of acting like I'm ok/happy is becoming near on impossible. Filled with a lot of self-loathing.

Esel

kronsington wrote: »

this is the worst ive felt in months.. i feel like the walls are closing in on me.. paranoia, anxiety, irritable. all my probems are magnifying. here in canada alone nearly 6 months, have pretty much nothing to show for it, live in a house with others who im quite sure dont like me, money problems, sick mother in ireland, estranged brother and father in ireland, messed up with that girl i metioned a few posts back.. my head is constantly racing- it will not stop. going out friday night hasnt helped. confided all this in a friend at home who basically called me out for mistakes from my best, spoke to me in a condscending patronizing manner and basically talked down to me. i simply dont know what to do. i am trying to get control of this i need to learn to relax, like myself and not be fixated with what others think of me.

This 'friend'?

you wrote:

My "friend" ( the toxic one I mentioned before)

Not a friend. Don't call/contact them again.

you wrote:

.. paranoia, ... others who im quite sure dont like me, ... walls are closing in on me... all my probems are magnifying... my head is constantly racing- it will not stop... i need to learn to relax, like myself and not be fixated with what others think of me.

My layman's advice to you: go and talk to your doctor in the morning. If you don't have a doctor there, go to a hospital.

For emphasis: My non-expert, objective advice to you is to ask for help from a genuine medical professional. Do it now.

Please, ask for help. It is available, and it will result in you feeling well again.

kronsington

Esel wrote: »

This 'friend'?

Not a friend. Don't call/contact them again.

My layman's advice to you: go and talk to your doctor in the morning. If you don't have a doctor there, go to a hospital.

For emphasis: My non-expert, objective advice to you is to ask for help from a genuine medical professional. Do it now.

Please, ask for help. It is available, and it will result in you feeling well again.

No it was a different friend.. I've cut ties with that other person

Killer_banana

Have less than 10 minutes to decide whether or not to go to work. Seriously tempted to call in sick.

Killer_banana

Killer_banana wrote: »

Have less than 10 minutes to decide whether or not to go to work. Seriously tempted to call in sick.

Called. I can't face it which is stupid because I love my job but when I tried to get out of bed I almost started crying. When ringing I felt guilty but also relieved. I've pushed myself to go in when feeling ****ty a lot lately and generally that's the best way to go but just can't today.

northgirl

sometimes you just can't...

cloud493

I think I should have gone to college. I got up at the right time, I had my shower, I got dressed, all that stuff, but I just couldn't do it.

northgirl

I've been for nearly 8 sessions of counselling through our EAP. On some level it's been helpful yet I still have terrible anxiety and many really bad days. My GP is a very nice man but even so, I find sometimes (and it could just be paranoia) that his patience wears thin..

CZ 453

northgirl wrote: »

I've been for nearly 8 sessions of counselling through our EAP. On some level it's been helpful yet I still have terrible anxiety and many really bad days. My GP is a very nice man but even so, I find sometimes (and it could just be paranoia) that his patience wears thin..

I'm glad counselling is helping you some bit. Are you taking meds? Do you have a diagnosis? Have you seen a psychiatrist?

I was saying to the lads above-The problem with the GP is that s/he has about 10-15 mins to see you and they are not really trained to hear all you have to say. If I was to tell my GP everything that bothers me in 1 session, it would go on for the week.

Folks tend to give out about GP's medicating patients easily. People usually are reluctant to pay the money for counselling and jump a step and head straight to the GP.

northgirl

shezer wrote: »

I'm glad counselling is helping you some bit. Are you taking meds? Do you have a diagnosis? Have you seen a psychiatrist?

I was saying to the lads above-The problem with the GP is that s/he has about 10-15 mins to see you and they are not really trained to hear all you have to say. If I was to tell my GP everything that bothers me in 1 session, it would go on for the week.

Folks tend to give out about GP's medicating patients easily. People usually are reluctant to pay the money for counselling and jump a step and head straight to the GP.

All of what you say is true. I've had problems for many years intermittently. No diagnosis as such. Not currently on meds.

I'm fortunate in that I can afford to pay to continue the counselling this time around.

handbagmad

Feel really sh1ty today.
Love a break away.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

CZ 453

handbagmad wrote: »

Feel really sh1ty today.
Love a break away.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

Talk to me. Where are we thinking of going? Lanzarote?

northgirl

handbagmad wrote: »

Feel really sh1ty today.
Love a break away.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

Hope you're doing ok Handbagmad.. you're not alone

northgirl

shezer wrote: »

Have you tried any books? I was told to get an anxiety workbook by the counselling service I was attending. It was brilliant. You write in examples of your anxiety attacks/moments. You could read about others examples. Anxiety disorders have a broad spectrum and most sufferers fit in to a few of the brackets and not just one.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Mindfulness-Acceptance-Workbook-Anxiety/dp/1572244992/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1413806687&sr=8-1&keywords=anxiety+and+acceptance

Thanks Shezer. I hadn't come across those books before.

handbagmad

shezer wrote: »

Talk to me. Where are we thinking of going? Lanzarote?

lanzarote in my dreams.:D

A tent up a fcuking mountain would do now

is mise spartacus

Managed to combat my anxiety at the gaga concert. Quite proud of myself

Killer_banana

shezer wrote: »

Temporary release for a longer term problem. I'm not saying by calling in sick you did the wrong thing but there are more options. I wasted so many days of life doing the exact same thing. Those same decisions add up and become a bigger number of days of life wasted.

Other options-
1.Talk to someone new
2.GP visit
3.Emergency Counselling
4.Emergency Psychiatrist visit

As daunting as it may seem to face those options, once you have it done, you will feel so much better because you'll be on a different track and even then it may not be the right one. The jump to the right one will be a lot easier though.

Been there, done that, got the crappy t-shirt in regards avoiding things and making things worse essentially. I actually love my job and generally going to work helps to keep me sane and improves my mood. I reach an all time low today and barely had energy to go to the shop let alone work. As for other options, they're all good and I did talk to a friend today as well as having a first contact session with a counselling service so I'm now on the waiting list for that. As I'm off tomorrow I think I will also have a long overdue check-in with my GP (which in some ways is inentional, I have a bit of a fear of doctors) and will hopefully get started on getting an OCD diagnosis and maybe some CBT for that as well. I am not saying I'm on top of this or that I'm a pro at handling my depression because I'm not at all, far too many times I've had periods of remission and stopped treatment because of them when realistically I should have kept going with it. I just wanted to explain that I'm not doing the whole temporary relief thing while avoiding the bigger problem. I did enough of that last year and ended up very close to the edge, I won't be doing it again.

cloud493

I'm psyching myself out for college again tomorrow. I can go to work no bother, but college isn't working for me.

CZ 453

Killer_banana wrote: »

Been there, done that, got the crappy t-shirt in regards avoiding things and making things worse essentially. I actually love my job and generally going to work helps to keep me sane and improves my mood. I reach an all time low today and barely had energy to go to the shop let alone work. As for other options, they're all good and I did talk to a friend today as well as having a first contact session with a counselling service so I'm now on the waiting list for that. As I'm off tomorrow I think I will also have a long overdue check-in with my GP (which in some ways is inentional, I have a bit of a fear of doctors) and will hopefully get started on getting an OCD diagnosis and maybe some CBT for that as well. I am not saying I'm on top of this or that I'm a pro at handling my depression because I'm not at all, far too many times I've had periods of remission and stopped treatment because of them when realistically I should have kept going with it. I just wanted to explain that I'm not doing the whole temporary relief thing while avoiding the bigger problem. I did enough of that last year and ended up very close to the edge, I won't be doing it again.

Fair play and thanks for explaining. Hope you're feeling better now.

Hugo Stiglitz

is mise spartacus wrote: »

Managed to combat my anxiety at the gaga concert. Quite proud of myself

Well done IMS!

Esel

Killer_banana wrote: »

Been there, done that, got the crappy t-shirt... won't be doing it again.

I read between the lines there. Well done.

cookie24

Got myself an interview for Thursday.The anxiety is already hitting along with that damned inner voice....'dont go, you'll make a fool of yourself, you'll fail, etc'.
Am trying hard to combat that inner voice, and psych myself up for the interview. Just hope when Thurs morning comes around I'm strong enough to bite the bullet and go.

**** you anxiety. I hate you so much and what you've done to my life to date.

chinacup

Does anyone else feel like their personality disappears with anxiety? I feel like I've lost my sense of humour and I lack the self control to be interested in things I actually think are important to be interested in therefore end up more personality-less due to lack of interests. Basically I try to find joy with constant mind numbing things even though self control might actually help me in the long run. Ok that's my pathetic rant of the evening. I'm feeling all de motivated and vulnerable. Staying in because too non-personalityish to go out and staying in to "study" i.e. watch random sh1t on youtube then fall asleep late and depressed. This is so illogical.

cloud493

I find I'm more in control, per se. I just say nothing, unless I'm sure I'm right and no one will call me up on anything.

chinacup

cloud493 wrote: »

I find I'm more in control, per se. I just say nothing, unless I'm sure I'm right and no one will call me up on anything.

I'm like that too sometimes but to the point that I won't open my mouth for days at a time. Basically at college I didn't make any friends until people approached me and decided I was going to lunch with them :P

Call Me Jimmy

I'm the same chinacup, always thought I could rely on my personality but it's the latest thing that I'm worried about. Used to be very good company but now it's such an effort I feel like I'm trying to live up to a past version of myself. Maybe just getting older but having a bit of a personality crisis.

northgirl

Feel the same. Feel like I don't know what happened to me or where I've gone and can't seem to find my way back. I know I have to move forward but it's almost like finding a new identity. Things that used to come easy to me are now difficult and it's frustrating me no end. Sometimes I wish I could just stop thinking for a while.. even the dreams are usually crazy.

Laois6556

Was it just into adulthood that ye started feeling like this or were there signs during your teenage years?