Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

Call Me Jimmy

Feelin similar frustration gongoozler. I'm not sure about how ye get into somewhere as an in-patient, I think someone rang for me the last the time and ye wait til there's a bed. But that was back when I had private health insurance. You could ask someone at your GPs, even the receptionist might know.

Staring at the moon there thinking it would be good in these dark times to be religious and be able to say to myself 'God has a plan'. If I could have stood there and believed that I'd be able to move towards recovery.

Also thinking well if I'm here this long and haven't killed myself after all this pain there must be something in store. Again I want to believe that. Why have I not killed myself where others have? Am I not REALLY suffering? Maybe the universe has a plan, or is just unfolding and I should be more patient about it. But at what point do I choose to act? Is that me or the universe? Sure I make a decision but the build up to the decision in my mind is not necessarily my own.

I wish I could have faith in something. The flip side of that is there are people who live from my age to old age as loners, never any change? Is there any reason to think THAT shouldn't or won't be me?

Damn weekend thinking.

Gongoozler

Tbh I don't feel I can wait till Monday

Call Me Jimmy

ring a hospital directly, or maybe samaratans (not for conversation, for information about getting into a hospital)

Gongoozler

I'm afraid of what it'll mean.

Call Me Jimmy

what'll it mean?

Gongoozler

Them contacting my dad, having to tell work, that they'll almost insist on going back on anti depressants, that I'll get nowhere and then I'll really have no option left

CZ 453

timecurve12 wrote: »

thanks to everyone who replied. I feel blessed.

Yes making friends is a problem, it's killing me that I can't seem to find anyone. People don't seem to appreciate me, I have no idea why. I'm getting out of bed and being functional but inside it's like I'm dying of some pernicious disease. Nearly everything I have done to try and change things, every good thing that gives me hop seems to have turned around. It's like a cruel joke, I have no idea why things go like that for me, it makes no sense. When I make friends they end up totally rejecting me or ignoring me (and I don't know why).

What have you tried? What hobbies do you have?
Have you got many friends now?
So many questions...sorry if it seems like i'm grilling you. I'm just trying to get a grasp of your situation.

Gongoozler

Ear infection? Sounds really rough CZ. You have my sympathy.

Gongoozler

Is there something you can do for that?

I'm not as bad as last night thanks CZ.

CZ 453

Gongoozler wrote: »

Is there something you can do for that?

I'm not as bad as last night thanks CZ.

I can ask someone to chop my head off :pac: but that's about it. Painkillers.

Did you get some sleep? Did you have breakfast?
Glad to hear you're feeling a bit better.

Gongoozler

CZ 453 wrote: »

I can ask someone to chop my head off :pac: but that's about it. Painkillers.

Did you get some sleep? Did you have breakfast?
Glad to hear you're feeling a bit better.

Tube feeding?
Yeah got a decent sleep. No breakfast, no milk in.

CZ 453

Gongoozler wrote: »

Tube feeding?
Yeah got a decent sleep. No breakfast, no milk in.

Jaysus....not even enough for a cup of tea. Off to the local shop with you and get yourself some hot food.

Gongoozler

Possibly enough left for tea, but I don't drink tea. Not feeling hungry anyway so doesn't matter.

CZ 453

Gongoozler wrote: »

Possibly enough left for tea, but I don't drink tea. Not feeling hungry anyway so doesn't matter.

Chance a piece of toast or something. You'll feel better after having something. Are you starting to reflect on yesterday?

Gongoozler

Don't have anything in. Don't worry, I won't starve myself. I'll eat when I feel up to it.

Not reflecting, thoughts are just continuing. I still don't know what I'm going to do. I do have to see my doctor tomorrow anyway so if I can I'll mention pieta house and ask for recommendations for a type of therapy from her.

bleach94

Hey there, I have recently started counselling in college which (hopefully) will help with what I'm feeling, but I'd love some input from here anyway.

I'm in second year in college and I've found I have these constant niggling feelings of anxiety which come and go. They range from just wanting to ignore everyone to wondering what the hell I was worrying about. A few things:
I live at home, about 20 minutes from college, which means I find it a bit harder to mingle with others. I have several interests like music, reading, art but find it hard to network enough with new people all the time, therefore I don't find as many people with similar interests to me as I would like. I find I am often on the peripheral of groups in college as I am naturally quiet, which is something that I am becoming increasingly frustrated with, and lonely as a result. Additionally, I have recently started going out with a girl in my course, about 3 months ago. It is my first proper relationship and therefore I am nervous, particularly as I have a (probably pointless) worry that she will eventually get bored of my quiet nature.
I don't have enough close friends where I live that I feel would be able to offer me advice. My mum and dad spend a lot of time dealing with my sister, who suffers from general anxiety disorder, so I don't feel I could burden them with my problems.

I feel like I have lots to say but at times I feel crippled by anxiety when talking to people I'm less comfortable with or who I don't know as well. It gets me down more and more and I feel could become a problem.

Is there any advice you can give on how to relax more when talking to people? This whole not talking thing is making me terribly insecure as I believe people will think I'm uninteresting and have nothing to say. Which I do.
Also, how do I relax into my new relationship? Is telling her about my nervousness advisable? I don't want to scare off a potentially great relationship after only four months?

CZ 453

Gongoozler wrote: »

Don't have anything in. Don't worry, I won't starve myself. I'll eat when I feel up to it.

Not reflecting, thoughts are just continuing. I still don't know what I'm going to do. I do have to see my doctor tomorrow anyway so if I can I'll mention pieta house and ask for recommendations for a type of therapy from her.

http://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/symptoms/appetite-problems

Gongoozler

CZ 453 wrote: »

http://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/symptoms/appetite-problems

Thanks for that, interesting stuff. I only ever have a decreased appetite when I'm extremely upset or depressed. I eat fairly normally otherwise. As I said, I won't starve, when I feel hunger I'll eat. If I was to eat now I'd feel ill.

CZ 453

Gongoozler wrote: »

Thanks for that, interesting stuff. I only ever have a decreased appetite when I'm extremely upset or depressed. I eat fairly normally otherwise. As I said, I won't starve, when I feel hunger I'll eat. If I was to eat now I'd feel ill.

Ah that was just to show where I was coming from.............Now eat it, Eat it!!!:pac:

bleach94

CZ 453 wrote: »

@bleach94
1. Living at home vs Not living with students?
2.Not connecting with students on Interests/Hobbies?
3.On peripheral or out groups?
4.Frustrated with being quiet?
5.Nervous with new relationship(first time)?
6.Not enough close friends to talk about missus to?
7. Sister isn't well
8.Missed chances to talk to peers?

Did I get everything? We can start there
What age are you?

That's the crux of it yeah.. Quite a list eh! But to be honest I think most, if not all of it, is rooted in lack of confidence/thinking I'm not good enough for people to get close to/fear of ending up alone. If you have any advice on how to help me overcome any of this it'd be great

handbagmad

alcohol and handbagmad will no longer be meeting each other.
I feel like the lowest of the low like my skin is crawling.

No tolerance anymore. 2glasses.

Wilberto

Esel wrote: »

2 weeks is nowhere near long enough to expect a positive response. 6-8 weeks is more realistic. Give them time!
Try to tell yourself that soon you will begin to feel better. Soon, as I said above, might be 8 weeks from now - but that is soon.
It is not a fight though. It is a journey. On a journey, however long (or short) it is, we can get bored / tired / dejected / depressed / anxious / paranoid. Then, we arrive, and realise we have survived the ordeal. Relatively soon afterwards ( weeks / months / years ), we remember the journey differently - maybe not as an ordeal, more of an adventure.

2 weeks and you are writing them off? Give them 8 weeks at least.

You don't plant a seed and dig it up every week to see if it is growing. Eventually, the plant will appear above ground. Let it grow.

Talk to your doctor (or more easily / more informative / cheaper) talk to your pharmacist.

Edit: Just saw your later post above. 37.5mg venlafaxine is the lowest dose (I think; IANAD). Talk to your doctor - they may want to increase the dose - sounds like your doctor was being conservative (a good thing, usually).

Stick with it for another 6 weeks at least - or even another 8 weeks. Keep in touch with your doctor too.

Sounds like your manager is on-board / supportive. This is great.

Soon, I hope, your perspective will change radically.

CZ 453 wrote: »

I won't preach at you. I'll just tell you what my experience was/is. I am on Sertraline 25mg because I'm so sensitive to them. It's a really really low dose. It took them weeks to take effect. I stopped taking them last year and it cost me a year of college.

Please,Wait it out and don't stop taking them.

If they don't work after another while then you can move on to another type. This is a common thing that happens. You may need to chop and change.

I meant to reply earlier but didn't really get the chance, and whenever I did I didn't really feel up to it.

That was probably a bit of a throw away comment in relation to the meds, borne just out of sheer frustration with myself. There's no chance of me stopping taking them so don't worry.

Like I said though, I'm just so frustrated with myself. Even now, I'm almost petrified about going to work tomorrow, which is stupid because it's a job which I should enjoy, which is ultimately why it's so frustrating.

Oh, and no, nobody at work knows any of this, including my account manager. She's just a really lovely person. Which is why I hate this because I know I'm just letting her down and probably putting her under even more pressure with her own work.

Hugo Stiglitz

Wilberto wrote: »

I meant to reply earlier but didn't really get the chance, and whenever I did I didn't really feel up to it.

That was probably a bit of a throw away comment in relation to the meds, borne just out of sheer frustration with myself. There's no chance of me stopping taking them so don't worry.

Like I said though, I'm just so frustrated with myself. Even now, I'm almost petrified about going to work tomorrow, which is stupid because it's a job which I should enjoy, which is ultimately why it's so frustrating.

Oh, and no, nobody at work knows any of this, including my account manager. She's just a really lovely person. Which is why I hate this because I know I'm just letting her down and probably putting her under even more pressure with her own work.

We all get the frustration Wilberto, no need to explain yourself here!

Regarding letting your manager down, I don't believe that you are letting her down at all. She would want you to focus and getting yourself well first and foremost.

Wilberto

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

We all get the frustration Wilberto, no need to explain yourself here!

Regarding letting your manager down, I don't believe that you are letting her down at all. She would want you to focus and getting yourself well first and foremost.

Yeah, except she probably just thinks that I'm a clumsy oaf and, to be honest, I wouldn't blame her either.

Hopefully the meds will start to help anyway sooner rather than later. I'm going back to my GP on Monday or Tuesday anyway as that's when he wanted me to come back to him anyway.

Hugo Stiglitz

Wilberto wrote: »

Yeah, except she probably just thinks that I'm a clumsy oaf and, to be honest, I wouldn't blame her either.

I actually am a clumsy oaf!

Rothko

I'm thinking of doing something that's causing me a lot of anxiety..... asking a girl out. I'm wondering if anyone here can suggest something that might help with my nerves or to make it easier. It doesn't help that I'm really inexperienced at this.

bleach94

Suas11 wrote: »

I'm thinking of doing something that's causing me a lot of anxiety..... asking a girl out. I'm wondering if anyone here can suggest something that might help with my nerves or to make it easier. It doesn't help that I'm really inexperienced at this.

You mean ask her out on a date or are you already at that stage and want to ask her to be your girlfriend?

Rothko

bleach94 wrote: »

You mean ask her out on a date or are you already at that stage and want to ask her to be your girlfriend?

Asking her out on a date.

bleach94

Suas11 wrote: »

Asking her out on a date.

Good.. I found that much easier with my current girlfriend than actually making things official! do you know her long? Do you guys have mutual interests that you can think of?

Rothko

bleach94 wrote: »

Good.. I found that much easier with my current girlfriend than actually making things official! do you know her long? Do you guys have mutual interests that you can think of?

I've known her a while. Yeah, we have a few interests and things in common. It's more how she'll react is what I'm worried about. I'm afraid of things being awkward if she says no.