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Being Shouted at in the Street

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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    I think the next time someone says something like this to me, I will round on them. The vast majority of them would probably wet their trousers when someone stands up to them.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    As a Mod has stepped in I won't quote anyone in particular but I just wanted to say I'm appalled that such prehistoric attitudes seem to still be supported and condoned by some men in this country. I bet they wouldn't feel the same if it was their daughter, mother, or sister.

    Anyway, just wanted to share another "hilarious" story from my weekend working behind a bar. Didn't happen to me, but to a female glass collector. I saw it happen from the bar though. A very rowdy stag group were in and making a nuisance of themselves all night. For whatever reason, they decided it'd be a great idea to smash about 5 pint glasses off the ground, sending glass flying everywhere. They got a very stern warning that they'd be thrown out if there was another word out of them.

    My colleague went to sweep up the glass reluctantly, because the lads had been making lewd comments about her bum at her all night. When she bent down to sweep the glass up, one of them kicked her so hard on the ass that she fell forward to the ground, onto some of the glass. The man was literally rugby tackled across the dancefloor by 3 security staff, the guards were called and the whole party was thrown out. She only had a few cuts (just her hands, knees mainly), but because they were on the palms of her hands she had to be sent home early, and was unable to work on Saturday night because she couldn't bend her fingers over the 3 stitches she ended up needing.

    Management were great, paid her for a full weekend of work and paid for her trip to South Doc but that asshóle didn't know that. If management weren't so nice she would have been down a day and a half of work over his stupid prank.

    All in good fun though, eh, just the lads having a laugh? :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,097 ✭✭✭kiffer


    WhiteRoses wrote: »
    As a Mod has stepped in I won't quote anyone in particular but I just wanted to say I'm appalled that such prehistoric attitudes seem to still be supported and condoned by some men in this country. I bet they wouldn't feel the same if it was their daughter, mother, or sister.

    Anyway, just wanted to share another "hilarious" story from my weekend working behind a bar. Didn't happen to me, but to a female glass collector. I saw it happen from the bar though. A very rowdy stag group were in and making a nuisance of themselves all night. For whatever reason, they decided it'd be a great idea to smash about 5 pint glasses off the ground, sending glass flying everywhere. They got a very stern warning that they'd be thrown out if there was another word out of them.

    My colleague went to sweep up the glass reluctantly, because the lads had been making lewd comments about her bum at her all night. When she bent down to sweep the glass up, one of them kicked her so hard on the ass that she fell forward to the ground, onto some of the glass. The man was literally rugby tackled across the dancefloor by 3 security staff, the guards were called and the whole party was thrown out. She only had a few cuts (just her hands, knees mainly), but because they were on the palms of her hands she had to be sent home early, and was unable to work on Saturday night because she couldn't bend her fingers over the 3 stitches she ended up needing.

    Management were great, paid her for a full weekend of work and paid for her trip to South Doc but that asshóle didn't know that. If management weren't so nice she would have been down a day and a half of work over his stupid prank.

    All in good fun though, eh, just the lads having a laugh? :rolleyes:

    ... that's a fairly serious assault situation.
    What did the Gardai say when they got there? I'd be filing charges... also if I where the worker I'd be maybe considering talking to a solicitor about suing the bar, when the guys deliberately smashed 5 glasses for the fun of it they should have been thrown out before they assaulted anyone.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    kiffer wrote: »
    ... that's a fairly serious assault situation.
    What did the Gardai say when they got there? I'd be filing charges... also if I where the worker I'd be maybe considering talking to a solicitor about suing the bar, when the guys deliberately smashed 5 glasses for the fun of it they should have been thrown out before they assaulted anyone.

    They took her details and asked her to come in at her discretion to make a statement, not sure how that went because I haven't been talking to her over the week but I'll find out at the weekend. Pretty sure the customer was arrested.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭Lou.m


    danslevent wrote: »
    Ladies, how often do groups of men shout at you or pass comments at you in the street? Contrary to what my username suggests, I am in fact a woman and I was nearly brought to tears by two separate encounters in the street yesterday.

    I was on my lunch break eating an ice-cream, passed three men and one said "Can I have a lick?" while they all jeered and laughed. As I was walking home from work, I passed a mini bus that had more than 11 men in it. They were pulling up outside a hostel so I assume a stag or something. They looked to be over thirty years of age, probably some of them have young daughters, they all began wolf-whistling, shouting things like "Hello gorgeous" or "Give us a smile". I know this attention is not because I am so stunningly beautiful, but merely because I am female and was walking alone. It would have happened to any woman that happened to be passing them....I walked away with tears in my eyes. I felt so degraded and embarrassed.

    This happens to me a lot, and I know my friends too. When I pass a group of guys I know that 30 percent of the time they are going to make some sort of comment towards me. I feel so objectified just because I am a woman. It should be so unacceptable to do this to a human being but it seems when some guys (not all now, of course not) are in a group they get a pack mentality and feel free to shout comments concerning appearance.

    When I am walking alone and see a group of young men ahead of me I can actually feel my stomach tightening because if they are of a certain social class or drunk or just acting boisterous, I know they are going to say something...or shout something...that makes me feel so embarrassed.

    Why does this exist? I feel so angry and upset about it, especially knowing that if I had a man with me, it wouldn't happen.

    I give them the finger start humming the American national anthem then take a bow.

    If total knobs wanna start with me I got lots to give....

    The deserve the piss ripping of their lives :D

    Originally Posted by YumCha View Post
    I'd say the majority of the street harassment I encountered was when I was under 18 - which is utterly depressing.

    Yeah once when I was 15 i was standing on Georges st waiting to be picked up by my mother. This guy in his 40's starts chatting me up and I try to stay away from him. He starts going on how Irish women are stuck up. I tell him I am only 15 and start walking away. He shouted out ' it starts at 14 and you're stunning' . My mother drove up and shouted at him to go away. He called her a clucking hen. She went mental. It was a good thing it was not my Dad though.

    I don't think breast size has anything to do with it. I am quite thin and not big. I don't think it is looks or whatever... I think they look for girls they think are alone or vulnerable....or sadly young.

    I would not be one who cannot take a joke or whatever either. But once I was on a bus and there was another girl and this drunk guy started to harass her for ages ...in front of everyone. Eventually people just started calling him a knob etc...both men and women.


    People like that are pathetic.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 221 ✭✭ShiftStorm


    I remember being in my teens and walking alone along O Connell Street at around 9 pm. A group of guys were walking behind me, wondering aloud whether I was wearing any underwear, what kind of underwear it was and how much they'd like to see it. They seemed to have a laugh about it and then walk on to their next victim, not thinking for a second about how sick, alone and scared I felt that maybe they would take it one step further.

    We could say 'boys will be boys' or we could call it for what it is: abuse of an undeserving, vulnerable (and in my case: underage) stranger for one's own entertainment. It's complete and utter assh0lery, pure and simple. Not one single male friend, family member or acquaintance I know would treat women like that. So either they aren't really men or those lads just out havin' a birra craic with the boyiz aren't.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭Lou.m


    Sexual harassment of girls as minors is very common sadly.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Freiheit


    was walking across a bridge a few days ago, a car blew it's horn and two 40 sumtin lad's shouted, "pull up your pants"...not sure if it was at me or another girl, but immediately checked my trousers to see if they were sagging, they weren't....the other girl looked a bit confused....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,150 ✭✭✭✭Malari


    Freiheit wrote: »
    was walking across a bridge a few days ago, a car blew it's horn and two 40 sumtin lad's shouted, "pull up your pants"...not sure if it was at me or another girl, but immediately checked my trousers to see if they were sagging, they weren't....the other girl looked a bit confused....

    This reminded me some years ago I was standing waiting for a friend and guy in a car started beeping the horn continuously at me. So ingrained is the "ignore beeps and shouting from randomers" mentality in me that I didn't look over for ages, which was when I realised that I knew the guy driving.

    Beeping a horn is never an appropriate way to attract the attention of a pedestrian, but especially not a girl dressed up to go out while she is standing around on the street. The likelihood is she will ignore you!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,987 ✭✭✭Legs.Eleven


    Lou.m wrote: »
    Sexual harassment of girls as minors is very common sadly.

    I can't believe how much of it goes on in Madrid. Adult women get shouted at but underage girls get the brunt of it usually by much older men, old enough to be their grandparents. I even saw a police car slow down in front of a group of girls who were no older than 16 to get a look at them one time.

    I was sitting on the metro last week and a man approaching 60 started to chat up a girl of about 15 sitting beside me. She had her headphones on had to take them off whenever he said something to her. She was trying to be polite and "respect her elders" but you could sense she was deeply embarrassed and uncomfortable. He kept insisting she talk to him while gawking at her bare legs for the whole duration of the journey.

    I remember it myself as a teen and the well-known creepy guys about who'd make comments and try to talk to you in really inappropriate ways. We knew it then and laughed it off and only as an adult did I realise something more sinister was at play.

    I can stand up for myself and tell these people to fcuk off most of the time if I feel uncomfortable and they've crossed that line but these are only young girls. It's creepy beyond belief. No doubt they have grandchildren as young as these girls, so I've no idea what's going through their heads carrying on this way.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 221 ✭✭ShiftStorm


    I can't believe how much of it goes on in Madrid. Adult women get shouted at but underage girls get the brunt of it usually by much older men, old enough to be their grandparents. I even saw a police car slow down in front of a group of girls who were no older than 16 to get a look at them one time.

    There are certainly problems in Ireland but I have lived in both Spain and France and I found it much worse for street harassment than it is here. The machismo and sense of entitlement of the men was shocking to me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I just ignore things like "can I've your number ?!!" or a wolf whistle, or "lookin well love", or "hey sexy " (not that it happens on a daily basis or anything!), I would tend to just keep walking and ignore. I wouldn't say it bothers me greatly but at the same time I would want to get past the people as quick as possible and would hope that they wouldn't continue shouting anything more.

    I will admit though that if alone, I do get a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach if I have to pass a group of lads who are obviously drunk and leery. I will be thinking in my head , please don't say anything, please don't say anything and actually breathe a sigh of relief if or when they don't.

    I was walking home from college one day, early in the afternoon and sunny out. Saw a group of drunken lads also students I presume, coming straight in my direction. One leapt out at me arms outstretched looking for a "hug".
    I completely froze on the spot in shock of this stranger just leaping at me, which of course enabled him to wrap his arms around me and start dryhumping my leg whilst his friends were bent over laughing... It only lasted a few seconds before I seemed to snap out of frozen state and shout get the fcuk off! Which he did and they continued on their way laughing.

    I was so embarrassed though. I know it is them who should have been embarrassed but my face actually felt hot and red with embarrassment that so many could have seen that.

    Since I put on weight I still fear that someday a group of lads will shout out something abusive about that as I have seen other girls getting "fat bitch" and things like that shouted but guess I have been 'lucky' so far in that regard. The sexy comments can be embarrassing and annoying but I think insulting comments would actually make me cry.

    I have had two bizzare experiences of insulting comments shouted at me before though they were not related to appearance. They were more sexual based than appearance.
    Once late at night I was outside my driveway giving a lost girl directions down the street, standing there in my pajamas and a fleecy top when a carload of fellas just shouted "Slappers!" to both of us before whizzing by.
    I just thought they were moronic idiots and myself and the other lady just laughed off their idiocy and said nothing else about it.
    Another time though I was walking into town alone in the daytime, I was wearing thick opaque black tights, black shoes, a black flowy skirt that came to my knees and a colourful top and buttoned cardigan. Again a car full of fellas, one obviously drunk in the back seat head sticking out the window screams !Sluuuuuuuuutt!!!!!!!!!!" at me as they sped past.
    (I know it should make no difference what clothes I was wearing at all but I am just more used to hearing other people get comments like that if wearing club clothes or late at night where lots of drunken people are outside nightclubs and pubs, it just shocked me in the middle of the day when I wasn't even done up, not that being done up is any excuse for people to shout comments at me)

    I'm not sure why this angered me so much but it really did. I was fuming, and I swear if I'd had a stone to hand I might have smashed that back windscreen. I know that is criminal and wrong and maybe I wouldn't really have done it, but I certainly visualized doing it and was fuming the whole way into town to meet my boyfriend.

    It was close to my home and again I was just so embarrassed, I was hoping that nobody I knew had heard them. I live in a student area so this kind of thing seems very common...:(

    Yeah so I guess most "complimentary" comments I would just ignore and not think much about again, but sexual insults or physical appearance or being physically "hugged/dryhumped" are things I now fear.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 221 ✭✭ShiftStorm


    Since I put on weight I still fear that someday a group of lads will shout out something abusive about that as I have seen other girls getting "fat bitch" and things like that shouted but guess I have been 'lucky' so far in that regard. The sexy comments can be embarrassing and annoying but I think insulting comments would actually make me cry.

    Horrible, and outside your own home? Eugh.

    For me, harassment is harassment but I see what you are saying about abuse that is intended as a complete insult, being even more upsetting.

    In my slim days, I couldn't go anywhere without being hassled. Now that I'm overweight, the 'complimenters' have quietened down considerably and in a weird way, has been a relief to be left alone. (Obviously being overweight is difficult in other ways but that's a whole other thread!)

    I haven't had much abuse from strangers about my appearance but last year, I was walking home along the canal, right outside my apartment. Two young guys were walking behind me and my OH. As they came closer, one of them muttered "I'd love to give her one over the kitchen table." I think they were trying to simultaneously upset me and rile my OH into a fight. My OH is not a big guy or a fighter and he wasn't have any of it. We ignored them and veered off the path to our apartment and the guys walked on. They were looking back at us, gloating smiles on their disgusting faces so I gave him the finger. His expression changed and he roars back for all my neighbours to hear "I'll give you the finger, you fat b1tch!". We went inside and locked the door and hoped they wouldn't come back.

    It totally shook me. I felt humiliated not only because of the sexual comment but because of the insult that followed about my weight which I was insecure about. It was horrible. Like you said, right outside my own home. And they now knew where I lived. I felt afraid I'd bump into them again and what they would do to me if I was alone.

    Harassment is one thing but if you reject or repel their "compliments", things can sometimes get even uglier. The proverb "hell has no fury like a woman scorned" is just as applicable to men, especially misogynists with fragile egos.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,957 ✭✭✭miss no stars


    I never really got much of this (thankfully). I think that might down to having a Resting B!tch Face so I always look like I'd kill them or something.

    I can only think of two incidents where a random person commented on me, one wasn't even what I'd call bad. The first was I was walking along, resting B face on (it's genuinely a default) and a middle aged guy said "cheer up, it can't be that bad". I just laughed. The second was really bizarre, walking along the swords road near whitehall and a car full of lads (going the opposite direction) just shouted at me "bet you're a dyke". It was the strangest thing, bit upsetting to have a car full of people randomly shout abusively at you. I just found it odd though, it was the middle of winter, late at night and cold. I had a hat, scarf, gloves and coat on. Do some men expect that all women should be showing off as much skin as possible no matter what the weather and that anyone who doesn't must be gay? It's as if they think women are commodities.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Freiheit


    I'm finding it worse in warm weather, rarely heard a whistle all winter, now it seems to happen a lot...


  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 6,856 Mod ✭✭✭✭eeeee


    Freiheit wrote: »
    I'm finding it worse in warm weather, rarely heard a whistle all winter, now it seems to happen a lot...

    Tell me about it. The heat goes to their heads. :rolleyes::mad:

    ETA I had an incident at my gym on Sunday. I went to the jacuzzi in the gym to try and work the racing out of my legs with one of the stronger jets of water. I brought a friend with me. I wear glasses, but I don't in and around the pool so I was as blind as a bat, trying to pummel the soreness out of my legs. I notice a small, fat, old baldy grey haired man with glasses on staring and smiling right up next to me. Eeeugh I think and just keep working on the stumps that used to be my legs. I shoot a 'what the fúck are you looking at' face at him and he looks away. Now there are shoulder jet things that come on and off in the pool and when they are on it colds the water around you. So he turns them on, comes back over to stare at me again. I just carry on and pretend I can't see him when his hands disappear and he goes up tp his shoulder in the water making weird faces. I don't have my glasses on and have my back turned to him so I miss most of it but then my friend comes over and starts saying 'what the fúck is up with yer man?' and he moves off…and does the same thing by every woman on her own in the pool. I reported him to the pool attendant when I seen one, but he had left by the time I seen her (pool attendant) having done his freaky stare and smile for a good half an hour and god knows what else to women on their own, feicing off when they are joined by someone else. CREEEEEEP.

    I seen him in there again today, and I asked him what the fúck he is looking at and reported him straight away. He made a run for it when he seen me pointing and talking to the pool person. Fúcking creep :mad: :mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,949 ✭✭✭✭IvyTheTerrible


    I only get shouted at when I'm exercising. I'm not sure why (because usually I can't understand what they shout as they drive by) but it happens about once every few weeks.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭FizzleSticks


    This post has been deleted.


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 11,362 ✭✭✭✭Scarinae


    I was walking home on Saturday night and a man stepped in front of me and tried to get me to stop and talk to him. I went to walk around him and he grabbed my elbow to make me stop, so I pulled my arm away and said "Please don't touch me" and kept walking. He shouted after me "Fcuk you anyway, you slut!" Thankfully I was with other people, I would have been much more intimidated if I'd been alone


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86 ✭✭dice3344


    I was out on Saturday night with my boyfriend and a few friends.. We were away in a different town for the night to celebrate a friends birthday so decided to head to the cheesy local nightclub (you know the type, sticky carpets and 90s tunes - usually a bit of craic with a group).

    Anyway, waiting to pay to enter, the guy behind me puts his hands around my waist, so I shoot around and say "can we all keep our hands to ourselves please?" He says nothing and looks away kind of sheepishly but there's a girl with him who then starts having a go at me. "What the hell did she just say to you?" etc. I ignored her and moved on in to meet my friends, but found it so annoying. How dare I tell her friend/boyfriend to keep his hands to himself. As soon as you enter the door to a pub, should you just abandon your self respect and let any old person have a grope? I don't think so...


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  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 6,856 Mod ✭✭✭✭eeeee


    Freiheit wrote: »
    out for an early morning sunday run a few weeks ago, I was standing in from the rain on severely 'disadvantaged' side street...I saw a stocky, muscular, tattooed guy walking and looking in my direction...as he got closer he crossed over to my side....Nothing might well have happened, but I figured it was better not to wait around to find out....and I ran off in the rain....

    ETA I misunderstood. I thought this was a different thread. Apologies.

    But I am a little confused as to what the issue is here?


  • Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 23,239 Mod ✭✭✭✭GLaDOS


    Read through this whole thread today and have to say it's a bit of an eye opener. I knew sometimes women had to put up with stupid comments but nothing on the scale or seriousness some of the posters here have recounted, some are downright abusive and should be reported to the gardaí. Very depressing that there's so many men out there who see women as nothing more than objects.

    Cake, and grief counseling, will be available at the conclusion of the test



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 893 ✭✭✭danslevent


    Walking out of my estate yesterday I passed a group of guys who started saying "Howiya?", I ignored them. They then got into their car, slowed down beside me and beeped their horn and started waving.

    Just f**k off. >:[


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    The worst is the fcukers who either do it from a speeding car going past you and you have to hope they're looking out the window to catch you giving them the finger, or the ones on foot who wait til you're just past them and say something juuust quietly enough (and then all start snickering) that they take away any proper opportunity for you to say anything back. Actually they're not the worst because they're not threatening, but it's bloody frustrating. Bunch of cowards.


  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 6,856 Mod ✭✭✭✭eeeee


    The worst is the fcukers who either do it from a speeding car going past you and you have to hope they're looking out the window to catch you giving them the finger, or the ones on foot who wait til you're just past them and say something juuust quietly enough (and then all start snickering) that they take away any proper opportunity for you to say anything back. Actually they're not the worst because they're not threatening, but it's bloody frustrating. Bunch of cowards.

    God yeah this does my head in. Even more cowardly cowards. The cowardliest of cowards! I still don't understand what they get out of it? I seen my young cousin in a group of young lads who did it, he was about 16 at the time, and I ate the head of him for it. I started by asking him why they did it and what was funny about it before I started giving out and he couldn't say why, only 'It just is'. He felt like a tool after I explained what it feels like to be on the receiving end of it. Maybe there should be a class in schools or something about mutual respect?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,114 ✭✭✭ivytwine


    gadetra wrote: »
    God yeah this does my head in. Even more cowardly cowards. The cowardliest of cowards! I still don't understand what they get out of it? I seen my young cousin in a group of young lads who did it, he was about 16 at the time, and I ate the head of him for it. I started by asking him why they did it and what was funny about it before I started giving out and he couldn't say why, only 'It just is'. He felt like a tool after I explained what it feels like to be on the receiving end of it. Maybe there should be a class in schools or something about mutual respect?

    I wish there were. Schools fall down majorly I think in reinforcing traditional gender roles. We were fed such rubbish about men in my school. I read something recently about a group of people in England who are going around to schools and talking to boys about respect and consent. The group is run by men and women, but they send the men in to talk to the lads, because they find the boys open up way more to another guy about these things. It sounded excellent. I will find the link later, think it was in The Telegraph!

    EDIT: Found it! Helping boys think differently about girls


  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 6,856 Mod ✭✭✭✭eeeee


    ivytwine wrote: »
    I wish there were. Schools fall down majorly I think in reinforcing traditional gender roles. We were fed such rubbish about men in my school. I read something recently about a group of people in England who are going around to schools and talking to boys about respect and consent. The group is run by men and women, but they send the men in to talk to the lads, because they find the boys open up way more to another guy about these things. It sounded excellent. I will find the link later, think it was in The Telegraph!

    EDIT: Found it! Helping boys think differently about girls

    That is brilliant. We need that over here. It should be a part of everyone's education, boys and girls (tailored for each obviously). I can see the merit of the boys doing it with each other rather than a mixed group, and visa versa, there's nothing more awkward than talking about sex and gender issues in front of your peers when you are an awkward, hormonal teen. Although it would be nice to bring the two groups together maybe at some point? Workshop it out? Role playing etc.? Or not. I'm just thinking out loud now. Great initiative though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,812 ✭✭✭Precious flower


    Was walking to the garage today to get bread and the newspaper and was walking along one side of the street that shaded by trees and this guy (must have been around 25 or so) was standing against the wall. He looked towards me said ''Hi, how are you>'' so I just said hi how are you back and walking on.

    Suddenly, he starts shouting for me ''Hey, girl! Hey, hey, hey! Hey darling!'' now it wasn't aggressive, but I just thought that if he had needed my help or anything like that he would have asked when I passed him and not when I was well away from him, or if I had dropped something that he would have said ''Hey, you dropped x'' which is way I didn't turn back and kept walking and on the way home crossed to the other side of the side so I wouldn't bump into him a second time (though there was no one there when I came back).

    After I felt like I had overreacted and acted rude not to turn away and go back to him and felt bad. But I don't know, I just kept walking because I didn't like the situation. Did I overreact?

    I do feel nervous when passing a group of guys, just anticipating some comment so I often have headphones in so if they say anything at least I'll only hear a muffled version (though I suppose they are more likely to say something if they think I can't hear them).

    But overall, it only twice happened to me that I've had abuse shouted at me (out of a car, both during the day one time being called a bitch going to work and another a group of lads roaring and beeping at me as I was out walking).
    These were both during the daytime too. It's one thing if a group of lads are drunk whatever, but when some of these guys think shouting at you is acceptable even when sober, I really can't understand that state of mind.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    The beeping and shouting out car windows is really annoying, mainly because there is no comeback. Do they actually think they look cool doing that?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,737 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    ivytwine wrote: »
    I wish there were. Schools fall down majorly I think in reinforcing traditional gender roles. We were fed such rubbish about men in my school. I read something recently about a group of people in England who are going around to schools and talking to boys about respect and consent. The group is run by men and women, but they send the men in to talk to the lads, because they find the boys open up way more to another guy about these things. It sounded excellent. I will find the link later, think it was in The Telegraph!

    EDIT: Found it! Helping boys think differently about girls

    The comments on that are truly scary - the whole thing is, apparently, a Feminazi plot, and telling guys it's ok to have emotions is 'efeminising'...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 769 ✭✭✭Frito


    kylith wrote: »
    The comments on that are truly scary - the whole thing is, apparently, a Feminazi plot, and telling guys it's ok to have emotions is 'efeminising'...

    Scary and frustrating. Young men should obviously have no emotional spectrum between being so angry they destroy everything around them and being so angry they kill themselves. Rage and aggression being the salient themes.

    Although my suspicion is that for some of the posters it's not really about what society should do to make life better for young men but rather what women should do.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,114 ✭✭✭ivytwine


    kylith wrote: »
    The comments on that are truly scary - the whole thing is, apparently, a Feminazi plot, and telling guys it's ok to have emotions is 'efeminising'...

    Didn't read the comments. Sometimes you've got to preserve your sanity!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,097 ✭✭✭kiffer


    I saw a "good" one yesterday.

    Three or four young men in a car drove out from a residential area, and spotted two or three young women walking along in shortshorts and crop tops. So one of the lads give a bit of a yell "something something the lads!" It was a bit indistinguishable but clearly (from where I was) regarding the girls.
    Anyway, just then a fella on a bike was wizzing by, and he thought it was directed at him (not unusual) he yelled back some response.
    For the guys in the car this was hallerious, like a two for one offer of annoying people.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    Hope you don't mind me dragging this thread back to life, but this fitted in here nicely.
    http://thisisnthappiness.com/post/96460057079/cat-call-ursa-eyer


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 893 ✭✭✭danslevent


    whiskeyman wrote: »
    Hope you don't mind me dragging this thread back to life, but this fitted in here nicely.
    http://thisisnthappiness.com/post/96460057079/cat-call-ursa-eyer

    Loved that! Thanks :)


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