Irish teetotalers - what's it like?

Kermit.de.frog

The revelation that probably raised the most interest in Ireland about the Rose of Tralee was not that she was gay but that she is in fact a teetotaler.:eek:


It must take some amount of effort to avoid ever drinking in Ireland. I didn't drink till 18 but even then the amount of peer pressure is extraordinary.

Anyone here a teetotaler? How do people react to you? I think you are an endangered species in Ireland and some protective measures might need to be put in place :pac:

catallus

It wouldn't be hyperbole to say that this country, especially its young people, are under the thumb of the vintners.

wazky

They are like queers and Cavan people, not to be trusted.

topper75

They are Late Late Show experts. Whether they want to be or not.

Kermit.de.frog

catallus wrote: »

It wouldn't be hyperbole to say that this country, especially its young people, are under the thumb of the vintners.

Yep.

More damage to health and society is done by drink in this country than every single other drug combined. Then people are surprised when an Australian newspaper demeans the Irish as drunks or every US president has to have a pint of guinness. The association of Ireland with drink and drunkeness has always been embarrassing. But it's true.

catallus

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Yep.

More damage to health and society is done by drink in this country than every single other drug combined.

Due to the easy access that people have to it, obviously.

Tombo2001

catallus wrote: »

It wouldn't be hyperbole to say that this country, especially its young people, are under the thumb of the vintners.

Thats true. As you get older, especially if you are a parent of young children, there is very little peer pressure to drink. Any drinking you do is by pure choice, and life is far easier if you drink very little or none at all.

AnonoBoy

wazky wrote: »

They are like queers and Cavan people, not to be trusted.

Jaysus! If it isn't the Bull Mick!


But the Rose of Tralee is queer and a teetotaler. Does one cancel the other out? Or is she doubly untrustworthy would you say?

preston johnny

She prefers to drink from the furry cup instead

Kermit.de.frog

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Anyone here a teetotaler? How do people react to you? I think you are an endangered species in Ireland and some protective measures might need to be put in place :pac:

I hardly ever drink. I just don't care for it and being a student until recently it made all the difference to my life to not have it as a financial drain. I don't care what or how often anyone else drinks, it doesn't affect me. Some drinkers care very much that I don't drink, as though it's some kind of personality flaw or handicap.

Things are much easier to live with outside of Ireland, where people don't make drinking some kind of statement of identity.

Peoples reactions are generally negative in Ireland, and you leave yourself open to comments like the following if you don't get hammered on a regular basis:

wazky wrote: »

They are like queers and Cavan people, not to be trusted.

topper75 wrote: »

They are Late Late Show experts. Whether they want to be or not.

AnonoBoy wrote: »

But she's queer and a teetotaler. Does one cancel the other out? Or is she doubly untrustworthy would you say?

And that's only within the first 8 posts of the thread.

Gyalist

I'm teetotal - not Irish but have lived here for most of my adult life. I don't give a toss what anyone thinks about me for not drinking. I march to a different drumbeat.

I have little respect for non-drinkers who lie about why they do not drink e.g "I'm on antibiotics". They should have the courage of their convictions to say proudly that they do not drink. It would be far better for their mental state if they told the truth.

Grayson

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

The revelation that probably raised the most interest in Ireland about the Rose of Tralee was not that she was gay but that she is in fact a teetotaler.:eek:


It must take some amount of effort to avoid ever drinking in Ireland. I didn't drink till 18 but even then the amount of peer pressure is extraordinary.

Anyone here a teetotaler? How do people react to you? I think you are an endangered species in Ireland and some protective measures might need to be put in place :pac:

I can honestly say I never experienced any peer pressure to drink. Probably because i was always drinking.


I have to say that some Irish social situations have to be horrible for teetotallers. Irish weddings post 2am are just messy. temple bar after 8pm. I've been at both sober and I honestly think they were horrible. fair dues to anyone who can suffer through them in good humour, but I'd avoid them if i couldn't drink.

topper75

preston johnny wrote: »

She prefers to drink from the furry cup instead

Know your limits. Not every furry cup is a standard drink.

Talib Fiasco

I've been drinking from a young age, even in Ireland and it shocked me in college in first year to see a good few people there who didn't drink. They were never really forced into drinking but within 3-6 months everyone of them was drinking and hit the bottle hard. I think it's nearly impossible to avoid drink as a young person in Ireland.

Timothy Bryce

I find it incredibly difficult to be honest.

I haven't really drank in the last number of years (may have a glass of champagne at a wedding, tops). I'm the wrong side of 30 and being hungover is not something I want to do any more. Drinking made me depressed and I want to use my weekends for rest and relaxation etc after a busy week of work, instead of hopping around a bed all day, riddled with anxiety.

What I've learned over the past few years is how people are suspicious of you when you're out with them and you're not drinking. It's almost as if you need an excuse not to be shoveling back pints & jaeger shots at record speed. At the beginning, I went for months saying that I was on antibiotics/under the weather/had something the next day etc, but it wore very thin very quick. I've learned that being honest about it probably the best approach when people ask you why you're not drinking.

I told my immediate group of friends that I was cutting down and they were all very supportive, but other groups of acquaintances who I might have gone out on the lash with, gradually stopped inviting me out and I barely see them any more. They were lads I only ever saw in the pub so it's not a huge loss to me.

I believe even in our 30's, there's still huge peer pressure around drinking. Try going out and just staying on the waters/fantas and see how many people give you every reason under the sun to sink a few drinks. I sometimes feel it's used as a justification for their own drinking habits - as if seeing someone sober & enjoying a night out might force them to see their own relationship with alcohol for what it is.

I made my choice re alcohol and I don't push my way of life on anyone else.

whiskeyman

I can remember the only lad in college who didn't drink.
Always remember him from his expensive Tag watch and nice car.
No wonder he could afford those... the money some of us spend on booze is absurd!

miss no stars

I'm not actually tee-total, but I rarely ever drink.

I enjoy a glass of wine now and then, but even when I'm out I'd seldom drink these days. Not a conscious decision, more something that evolved over time. Never really come under much pressure to drink if I decline a drink, although being female and the wrong side of 25 I suppose people might think there are reasons at play if I'm not drinking lol.

Grayson

miss no stars wrote: »

I'm not actually tee-total, but I rarely ever drink.

I enjoy a glass of wine now and then, but even when I'm out I'd seldom drink these days. Not a conscious decision, more something that evolved over time. Never really come under much pressure to drink if I decline a drink, although being female and the wrong side of 25 I suppose people might think there are reasons at play if I'm not drinking lol.

There is a difference between drinking lightly and not drinking.
If I went out and had a few fanta's I'd get strange looks. If I nursed a pint or two people might not even question it, even if they noticed.

wazky

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Jaysus! If it isn't the Bull Mick!


But the Rose of Tralee is queer and a teetotaler. Does one cancel the other out? Or is she doubly untrustworthy would you say?

Approach with caution.

miss no stars

Grayson wrote: »

There is a difference between drinking lightly and not drinking.
If I went out and had a few fanta's I'd get strange looks. If I nursed a pint or two people might not even question it, even if they noticed.

More often than not, when I'm out I'm only drinking 7up.

Sometimes I'll get through one drink, then move on to 7up.

I get the difference

I've had people buy me vodka and 7up when I've asked for 7up. Doesn't matter how clearly I put it, there's often one who'll say 'Ah, but you have to have a drink'. No, I don't have to.

KungPao

I gave up drinking for the month of January. But to be honest, the sobriety turned me to drink.

I love an aul beer.

miss no stars

Candie wrote: »

I've had people buy me vodka and 7up when I've asked for 7up. Doesn't matter how clearly I put it, there's often one who'll say 'Ah, but you have to have a drink'. No, I don't have to.

What do you do in that situation?

I can imagine people being really offended if you went up and bought yourself a fresh un-vodka-ed 7up.

miss no stars

miss no stars wrote: »

What do you do in that situation?

I can imagine people being really offended if you went up and bought yourself a fresh un-vodka-ed 7up.

I tell them I won't drink it. As far as I'm concerned, I won't be forced into drinking because someone else wants me to. I tell them to keep it for themselves and I buy myself whatever I want. Some people get offended, but I'm not going to do what someone tells me to to spare their feelings when they completely disregarded mine.

It doesn't happen much anymore, the further away from my teens and early 20's I get, the more I find myself with like-minded people. Nobody I know these days has a problem with me not drinking, and many of them don't either. It's just when you're a young student that the peer pressure is really bad.

Tonyandthewhale

I don't really drink and generally it isn't a problem. I rarely feel pressured into drinking and if I did, well there's nothing to stop me taking a drinking, I'm not a recovering alcoholic and I've taken no religious vows so it's not an issue.

What is a bit annoying is 'would you not even have a fanta or something?' I get asked this a lot, for instance when someone's buying a round. Sure I have nothing against fanta but if I'm in the pub with the lads and they're ordering rounds I'm not going to have one fizzy drink for every beer they down. Sometimes it seems like our national obsession isn't just with drinking alcohol but with drinking itself. And I'm not that thirsty.

Young Blood

I gave up drinking in my early 20s. I had too many bad experiences with alcohol. I’m not suited to the Irish ‘herd mentality’ and my wallet is better off as a result.

orestes

Not teetotal, but quit drinking a couple of years ago, and have been the bar manager for the biggest pubcrawl in Europe for the last year, which happens to be in the country that drinks more beer than any other every year (Czech Republic) making me the only sober person surrounded literally hundreds of drunk people every single day, which doesn't bother me at all, but an hour in an Irish pub as a non-drinker makes me want to lose my sh!t. The Irish relationship with drink is seriously fukked up.

Karl Stein

I MADE THE BBC.

KungPao

Karl Stein wrote: »

I MADE THE BBC.

Bloody priests, sanctimonious scumbags!

seamus

Like being vegetarian, I imagine the hardest part of being an Irish teetotaller is having every second person ask you why, and one in ten people getting a little bit angry and confrontational about it.

Burky126

Through some crazy miracle,I managed to avoid drinking until I was 20. It never bothered me that I didn't drink. Sure my mates would rip into me now and then when I hung out with them at bars before I started but they were, on the most part, fine with it.

I don't drink now and have been sober for months now. Due to how things are presently, I have no inclination of ever going back to the stuff. It was fun while it lasted but I think back and remember that 6/10 times I got drunk weren't worth it in terms of money,health and behaviour. I just came to that conclusion and keep it with me like if it was a note in my back pocket.

Do I feel left out at times? Maybe. Is it worth coughing up the contents of my stomach? Absolutely not. It's not for everyone but those who do drink, if they cool, we cool. In my experiences both sides of the spectrum can be dicks if you're one or the other. The main thing is to respect decisions of others and if someone has a problem on a night out, reach out and ask them if they're alright be it stranger or friend. Though if you're an adult, you should already know this.

chrissb8

Irish people don't like seeing others trying to better themselves around drink. They take it as a slight when someone isn't drinking because they assume they think you're too good for them all of a sudden. In reality it just p***es them off that someone else can get by in life and enjoy it without getting drunk and have a higher amount of self control.

seamus

Burky126 wrote: »

Through some crazy miracle,I managed to avoid drinking until I was 20. It never bothered me that I didn't drink. Sure my mates would rip into me now and then when I hung out with them at bars before I started but they were, on the most part, fine with it.

I don't drink now and have been sober for months now. Due to how things are presently, I have no inclination of ever going back to the stuff. It was fun while it lasted but I think back and remember that 6/10 times I got drunk weren't worth it in terms of money,health and behaviour. I just came to that conclusion and keep it with me like if it was a note in my back pocket.

I think this is an attitude you either develop or you don't, and you can't train yourself into it in your adult years. I knew a guy in school just like this. Just didn't have any interest in drink - "Tried it, didn't like it". Met him a few years later in college. He was nursing a pint, and when I commented on it he said he just gets it and holds onto it for most of the night so people won't keep pestering him to have a drink.

For someone like me who loves his few beers, I would find it nigh on impossible to get myself into this frame of mind. However, the longer you're off the beer, the less you feel drawn to it, so it would certainly get easier over time to say, "Nah, not for me".

chrissb8

chrissb8 wrote: »

Irish people don't like seeing others trying to better themselves around drink. They take it as a slight when someone isn't drinking because they assume they think you're too good for them all of a sudden. In reality it just p***es them off that someone else can get by in life and enjoy it without getting drunk and have a higher amount of self control.

It might be that with some, but I think most of the time people don't think too much about it. Not drinking is outside the social norm in Ireland, and that just makes people uncomfortable generally, so they try persuade the non drinker to join in. There are those who think it shows them up though, that's true.

When people grow up a bit they're usually more comfortable with extending their ideas of normal behaviour. The younger you are, the more conformist you're likely to be among your peer group, and as you develop you get more comfortable with individuality and people going their own way is less socially threatening.

Holsten

"Why arn't you drinkin?
What's wrong?
Ah go on have one!
Ah come off it, you'll be having a few beers later!
Are you on antibiotics?
Look at this chap thinking he's great with his water!
Is that non alcoholic beer? Are you mad?"
Etc...

Young Blood

I think family life has a lot to do with how much a person drinks. My father introduced me to alcohol when I was about 12/13. He would give me sips of beer and whiskey and that kind of gave me a sense of responsibility around the stuff in later life.

My friend on the other hand came from a family who was very strict on the topic of drink, apparently because his grand father was an alcoholic, and his mother was a teetotaler and very religious as a result. I think hes a heavy drinker by Irish standards and his family influenced it for sure.

Paddy@CIRL

I'm 28 and have never drank in my life. No idea why, I don't hold anything against people who do, I guess it's just not my thing. I prefer to either work or work on my car and drive.

As one poster above put it, it does get tiresome getting interrogated every time you order a diluted orange on a night out. That's definitely the worst part of not drinking.

ardle1

Tombo2001 wrote: »

Thats true. As you get older, especially if you are a parent of young children, there is very little peer pressure to drink. Any drinking you do is by pure choice, and life is far easier if you drink very little or none at all.

Absolutely, I'd also just like to add.... Everything seems(as it should)less stressful, jobs you have to do are no longer a chore but a challenge you look forward to or at least don't mind doing, also I would say there is far less depression in non drinkers... In fact I would bet a lot of money on that particular point!

Tarzana

Candie wrote: »

And that's only within the first 8 posts of the thread.

Two of those comments were clearly jokes.

Ave Sodalis

I'm a non drinker, 20 and going into my final year of college. I've gotten drunk once or twice to see what it's like and I've tried most drinks but it's really a hassle to spend a heap of money on something that tastes disgusting, in order to get yourself into a mindset that you don't particularly enjoy being in. I still go out and stuff and I don't mind other people drinking, as long as they're not messy or violent. The response I find works best is "I don't need to". It doesn't really give much room for discussion, unlike "I don't want to". Then people just try to change your mind.

Tarzana

seamus wrote: »

Like being vegetarian, I imagine the hardest part of being an Irish teetotaller is having every second person ask you why, and one in ten people getting a little bit angry and confrontational about it.

I can imagine people being more vocally perplexed about non-drinking than vegetarianism. Maybe I'm wrong.

Adamantium

I'm a very happy go lucky, rambling guy and people have remarked at that, so drinking offers no benefit to me, honestly it's a bit of a crutch.

It does make me quite sad how some men will hardly dare talk to a woman and will suddenly start hitting on every last woman in a club after knocking back a tonne.

Chrisssttt...they're just as human and as scared as you.

Honestly not drinking as a teenager except like once every 2 years, made me dive head first into building a personality, I just didn't know it at the time, that was what I was doing. I prefer stumbling my way and learning as I go.

Tarzana

I've been tinkering with the idea of quitting completely. Drinking makes me really anxious and depressed, plus I earn 20k per annum and live in Dublin. I simply can't afford regular drinking sessions. And I want to lose some weight. Another good reason to quit.

mickoftheglens

I am a teetotaler but it means that I am also unsociable and don't go to pubs or clubs

Calina

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

It must take some amount of effort to avoid ever drinking in Ireland. I didn't drink till 18 but even then the amount of peer pressure is extraordinary.

While I agree that there is a whole pile of peer pressure around drink, the simple truth is if someone genuinely doesn't want to drink, they won't.

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Anyone here a teetotaler? How do people react to you? I think you are an endangered species in Ireland and some protective measures might need to be put in place :pac:

I'm from Ireland but don't drink. I also lived out of the country for five years after college graduation and came back in 1999. For the most part, I got grief from people who, while not forcing alcohol on me, made it abundantly clear that they could not understand why someone wouldn't drink and why someone could not see the attraction of getting ratarsed drunk and swapping stories about how heavy their hangovers were.

IME, a lot of Irish people aren't so much interested in drinking as in getting trashed and then finding others who did so when they're sick, they can convince themselves they're all in it together.

Mostly, I have found that a) some people go "Designated driver, yeehaw, I can get trashed" and b) some people don't actually remember when you leave because they are trashed.

None of my friends have ever tried to bully me into drinking something I don't want to drink. The only people who have are people who don't really know me, workmates and the like. I've long been of the opinion its a lack of self confidence on their part.

The whole "great night, can't remember a thing" was damn all use as a trope to hang an ad against drinking too much when a whole whack of people used it as a badge of honour. I've heard that.

So OP - the issue in Ireland in my view is not that people drink, but that people drink to get drunk. We wouldn't be having this conversation if getting drunk wasn't the objective.

Daveysil15

Apparently there are over 130,000 pioneers in Ireland now so its not that uncommon.

I rarely drink. It's not as much of a problem now as it was when I was in my early 20's. There's more peer pressure on youngsters to got out and get pissed.

Calina

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Apparently there are over 130,000 pioneers in Ireland now so its not that uncommon.

Nothing on this planet would persuade me to sign up to the pioneer movement.

Burky126

seamus wrote: »

I think this is an attitude you either develop or you don't, and you can't train yourself into it in your adult years. I knew a guy in school just like this. Just didn't have any interest in drink - "Tried it, didn't like it". Met him a few years later in college. He was nursing a pint, and when I commented on it he said he just gets it and holds onto it for most of the night so people won't keep pestering him to have a drink.

For someone like me who loves his few beers, I would find it nigh on impossible to get myself into this frame of mind. However, the longer you're off the beer, the less you feel drawn to it, so it would certainly get easier over time to say, "Nah, not for me".

That depends how early you start drinking,right? I'm sure if I started as a teenager, I would still be at it,a taste of alcohol is something you become more adjusted to the earlier you start. I wonder how old that guy you knew from in school was when he started. Also,your first drink is also a indicator to some degree if drinking is for you.

What happened to get me in my current frame of mind was replacing the negative (which would often come to the surface whenever I thought back on events no matter how well I previously imagined them) with positive outcomes towards taking up other activities or goals I always wanted to do. It wasn't something I did overnight either, I drank less and less over a period of months until that was that, the need was gone. It is a huge task and anyone who has tried on their own,my heart goes out to them.

The pub is so ingrained in the heart of all culture in this country it's hard to ignore it. At the end of it all, if you don't feel like you shouldn't drink because of health and/or pressure,don't. You've no one to answer to but yourself, not regular Karl who complains the whole night that "you're no craic no more."

As sup dude mentioned,the response is

"I don't need to".

RobertKK

I don't drink alcohol, I use to but gave it up near three years ago, was never really into it as both parents didn't drink and I don't know if that influenced it

I am just a tea addict.

Daveysil15

Calina wrote: »

Nothing on this planet would persuade me to sign up to the pioneer movement.

I've a couple of pioneers in the booth of my car. There's a great sound off them.

Inanna

I don't drink but I wouldn't call myself a teetotaller as to me that implies going out of your way to avoid it due to some moral objection. I just don't have any interest in drinking. I've drunk at occasions like weddings and such in the past where it's sort of expected but that's it.