Clingy 6 yr old

greengirl31

Hi Folks,

I’m hoping someone has some advice to offer here as the guilt at this stage is starting to get to me.

My daughter has just gone into 1st class and will be 7 in a few weeks. She’s a bright happy child who does well in school and socially (for the most part). She has always been a sensitive child but generally she gets on well with her classmates and the kids in her afterschool place.

The issue is that while she'd regularly tell me that she missed me during the day when i pick her up in the evening, recently, she has become extra clingy to me. One example is recently she had a lovely day out with my sister (who she adores) and later that night burst into tears cause she missed me that day. I thought maybe something had happened like she got lost in a shop or got some sort of fright but she said no that it was just that she wanted me to have been with her. I was popping over to a friend’s house one evening last week and my dad was sitting with her and she was sobbing saying she didn’t want me to go and that I’d never told her. I’ve to go out one evening this week and mentioned it to her last night and got all upset again. I asked if she wanted me to get someone other than my dad to babysit and she said – no that she just didn’t want me to go cause she’d miss me too much. I’ve talked to her and told her that I’d only be gone for a little while and that I’d tuck her in when I was home etc but she was having none of it – she was sobbing her little heart out last night.

While all of this was very sweet at the start, it’s getting to be a little upsetting at this stage. I’m a single mum and her father isn’t in the picture at all so I have to rely on babysitters. I don’t go out that often but now it’s an extra thing I have to factor in when I need or want to go out for an evening.

Has anyone any suggestions on how I should tackle ?? Any advice would be appreciated

Thanks A

GalwayGirl26

If it's only recent then perhaps something happened to instigate it; saw something on TV, had a nightmare, heard something from a friend etc?
Try get to the bottom of it by talking to her.

greengirl31

Well she's always been a little bit clingy but it seems to have got worse lately ... Before she never minded me going out or being away from me but now when i mention that i'm going out theres always tears !!! I've talked to her to see if i could get to the bottom of it ... but i'm still at a loss.... Nothing major has happened in our day to day routine, it was happening during the summer so I don't think it's anything to do with shcool. I've spoken to them in her afterschool and they said she's the same as always with them - she gets on well with her friends (although the boistrous ones tend to overwhelm her a bit but that's always been the case). I've asked her why she doesn't want me to go and the only answer she has is that she'll miss me too much. I've re-assured her that i'll be back in a few hours but it doesn't seem to calm her.
She's such a good little girl and a very sensitive and gentle girl - I hate to imagine what's going through her little head in when i'm gone - but i have to go:(

FurBabyMomma

Maybe sit down with her and ask her to draw 3 things in her life that make her happy and 3 things that make her sad? Obviously one sad thing will be her missing you but it might throw up a couple of issues you are unaware of in a no-pressure situation?

greengirl31

FurBabyMomma wrote: »

Maybe sit down with her and ask her to draw 3 things in her life that make her happy and 3 things that make her sad? Obviously one sad thing will be her missing you but it might throw up a couple of issues you are unaware of in a no-pressure situation?

Never thought of that ... I'll give it a go and see what comes out of it

FurBabyMomma

Good luck. It may come to nothing but kids can be very good at hiding something that is bothering them by deflecting it onto another behaviour. But if nothing comes of it, it still is a nice way of opening lines of communication and establishing trust for the future - may come in handy.