Some advice please...

Ladybird37

Hi Guys,

My first time posting here. I am hoping to get some advice please...

My fiancé and I decided last September 2013 to stop using any contraception and have been having regular unprotected sex since then. I guess you could say that we weren't trying but weren't doing anything to prevent it either. Can this be counted at "trying"? I have pretty regular periods which vary from 24-28 days. I'm 29.

It has now been a year and I'm starting to worry that we might have some issues conceiving. I have not been temping or using any ovulation strips. Could it just be bad timing and missing the egg?? Due to a change in our circumstances we have now decided to start using contraception again and will put our baby plans on hold for a year.

Even though we have decided this, I am going to start using ovulation tests, just to see if I am actually ovulating. I was also wondering if it would be worth while going to see my GP, if only to put my mind at ease? Are these tests expensive? And can they do a sperm test in the GP office too?

I'm happy to put our baby plan on hold for now, but would hate to find out when we do start trying that there is something!? Oh to have a crystal ball!!

any advice welcome and thanks for taking the time to read this.

Neyite

In answer to your queries, you'd normally begin consultations being unsuccessful for a year, 6 months if you are over 35.

Honestly, do wait until you are ready to begin trying to get investigations because about 20% of couples who have difficulty never find out the cause - they are categorised as unexplained. So you could do all the tests and come back fine, but still need assistance. Its an area of medicine that, though its quite high-tech, there is a lot that they dont know too. You'd spend the best part of €500 - €750 between blood tests, semen analysis, and consultants visit only to have to repeat the process (and the money spent!) a year later when you do want to get pregnant and go to them for assistance, as they'll need recent results from both of you to form a treatment plan.

Ovulation kits work by testing for a hormone called Lutenising Hormone that surges about 48hrs before your ovaries are ready to release an egg. You can test for the LH surge, but be aware that in some women it can be quite short and you could miss it if it occurs during sleep for instance. I've often missed mine, and I've had the bloods done often enough to confirm that I did ovulate.

What I would suggest, if you wanted, is that you get your fertility bloods tested on days 3 and days 21 of your cycle. That will tell you if you ovulated because it compares the hormones on day 3 with the ones on day 21 when you normally would have ovulated. But again, you are paying for gp visits there, and it does only give you half the picture. You'd not be able to get these done when on hormonal contraceptive though.

skallywag

Neyite wrote: »

...about 20% of couples who have difficulty never find out the cause - they are categorised as unexplained...

We are in this bracket ourselves, it's an odd type of limbo as it leaves your questions unanswered but also gives you hope somehow that things may still work someday ...

kaki

Gosh Ladybird37, I could have written your post word for word!

I came off implanon in October 2013 and we spent a year "not trying not preventing". Our circumstances also changed significantly within the last 2 months so kiddos have been put on the back burner.

However, like you, I was a bit uneasy that nothing had happened over a year - additionally my periods took about 6 months to come back regularly, I wasn't feeling ovulation twinges at all and no obvious fluctuations in CM either. I bought some cheapo OPK sticks to try and verify if I was ovulating but never got a positive over an 8 month period.

(As a side note, like Neyite said, there's a knack to using these - the hormone is synthesised in the morning and doesn't generally appear in urine until the early afternoon. Also although ovulation is taught to occur at 14 days, in reality women can have shorter and longer luteal phases. I would typically test from day 8 through 18 at around 12pm. So hard to manage discretely in the bathroom stalls at work lol)

When we decided to take a hiatus from baby-making, I didn't feel comfortable going straight back on hormonal contraception. It seems that my body is taking a while to bounce back and recalibrate from 4 years of hormonal contraception (although I feel like the exception to the rule, talking to friends and relatives). I also feel a bit out of touch with my body and cycles, I think after an intense few years both at work and at home where I haven't been looking after myself very well (diet/exercise/sleep-wise).

Our strategy is the Billings method (fertility awareness) for now, plus barrier methods during fertile times. I've started charting to build up a better picture of my own fertility in general and plan on the day 3 day 21 bloods in the next 3 - 6 months if I still have no joy with the OPKs. Planning to modify my lifestyle a good bit as well as it plays a huge role in your overall health - fertility is just one aspect.

I would second that specific tests (e.g. ovarian reserve, natural killer cells, sperm count/morphology) would be (a) Expensive (b) Stressful (c) Inefficient, as they will only reveal your current values (which can fluctuate over time) for a gamut of specific tests that don't even cover everything.

Hope this can help you in some way and good luck with your journey