The Terrible Twos - Share your tips /tricks /rants here!

Neyite

I'm finding the counting method to be semi-successful.

Ask him to do something, then when he refuses, tell him I'll count to three and come over and pick him up and do it, then slowly count, and by 3 he usually obliges.

When he doesnt want to go to creche in the morning, I acknowledge it and tell him I'd love to stay at home too, but I'm not allowed, I have to go to work, and he has to go to to creche, and reiterate that we are not allowed to stay at home today, but after creche we will go to the park /shop whatever. I'm a firm believe in keeping my promises. I remember distinctly my father promising me something when I was about that age, when I was upset. I waited ages for it, asked for it, and never, ever forgot how it felt when I realised that I'd never get that toy. I still remember that feeling.

So I never promise something as a fob-off.

the_monkey

I never understand the resistance to getting dressed - YOU CAN STILL DO WHAT YOU WERE DOING !!! JUST NOW YOU WILL BE WEARING PANTS !!!

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

cyning

My little monster took her top off on top of the tall slide in the playground last week and threw it down at me laughing: refused to come down: then eventually came down the slide and legged it to the other side of the playground half naked while trying to take off her pants... I give up on clothes

We have a naughty step/corner here. But what works best is distraction: she helps when I'm hoovering I give her a cloth to polish, cooking she gets me the milk and butter from the fridge or if I chop the peppers/carrots she puts them in a bowl.

When out and about a stream of snacks, drinks (she only drinks water so it's ok!), stickers to decorate the buggy, fireman Sam on my phone if we are doing the shopping. Otherwise we end up leaving wherever we are. She has improved a bit lately I was nearly afraid to leave the house a few weeks ago!

Mink

We have worst tantrums when he's tired/hungry and I've missed the signs.
There's usually no return from those ones apart from just calming down over the next 15 mins.

Generally he's pretty good and seems to mostly respond to a stern tone of voice but I really have to find a balance between picking my battles, keeping him safe (and dry, and clean) and freedom for him.

For instance if I say the word "bath" but don't actually bring him upstairs and bath him, he goes absolutely apesh1t so I have to watch some keywords haha. Also if we go to the park and the toddler swings are all in use, there is no limit to the fury (and tears and snot) he will unleash and I've had to put him straight back in car and go home. He doesn't get turn-taking specifically in relation to swings.

He doesn't say many words yet but as this picks up over next few months I'll introduce naughty step/time outs if needed.

Sligo1

Mink wrote: »

We have worst tantrums when he's tired/hungry and I've missed the signs.
There's usually no return from those ones apart from just calming down over the next 15 mins.

Generally he's pretty good and seems to mostly respond to a stern tone of voice but I really have to find a balance between picking my battles, keeping him safe (and dry, and clean) and freedom for him.

For instance if I say the word "bath" but don't actually bring him upstairs and bath him, he goes absolutely apesh1t so I have to watch some keywords haha. Also if we go to the park and the toddler swings are all in use, there is no limit to the fury (and tears and snot) he will unleash and I've had to put him straight back in car and go home. He doesn't get turn-taking specifically in relation to swings.

He doesn't say many words yet but as this picks up over next few months I'll introduce naughty step/time outs if needed.

O that sounds all too familiar!!! The swings! Absolute nightmare. Thank god just in the last week I think he's starting to understand about taking turns. He now waits (with me holding onto him for dare life) and says "wait turn" . Cue me "o aren't you the best most patient boy in the world". Then the swing becomes avaliable... And it's the bloody slide he wants! Lol

mrsWhippy

I'm just delighted to read i'm not the only one who's head is melted by their 2 year old!

My girl has just turned 2, and has become so difficult and defiant over the past month or so. EVERYTHING is a battle (and believe me I DO pick my battles!). Her speech is very good for her age so she is well able to communicate when she wants to, she just prefers to shout NO MAMA and kick and do something bold instead.

I'm determined not to use a naughty step or time out if at all possible, I'd prefer to use positive reinforcement and empathy (that ahaparenting website has some brilliant tips) but it's so so so difficult to keep your cool sometimes! When she refuses to get dressed or something, I try not to make a battle out of it, but say calmly 'That's ok, we can't go to the park until you're dressed - you let me know when you're ready to get dressed and then we can go' and I usually leave the room and let her at it. She often comes to me willingly when she know's she's not getting a fight or attention! Only works if you're not in a hurry

She is a bit of a bolter when out and about too - I find it helps to explain in simple terms 'We are going to the shop now, if you run away from Mama, you will be going into your buggy/going back to the car etc' and then actually follow through if necessary despite the screams. If she knows what behaviour is expected of her, then it's easier for her to follow I think.

Anyway I'm sure she'll have grown out of it by the time she is 24. Argh!

Rachineire

is there some sort of 20-21 month sleep regression that I don't know about??

the past 3 nights he has woken up SCREAMING- at first we thought it must be his teeth. Checked his mouth, nothing in the gums, calpol making no difference.
Thought he might be sick, no fever, no sniffles no any sign he is feeling unwell.

I finally sussed that its a control thing. He wakes up at night and wants me to come in and pick him up and NOW. he is waking up 5-6 times a night in a total rage screaming if daddy tries to get him. as soon as I pick him up and sit in the rocking chair with him he settles right back down. If I try and take in to our bed (or the spare room) he is enraged! he wants me to hold him in the rocking chair while he sleeps!

Needless to say this isn't happening and so there has been a significant lack of sleep. I'm sitting here in work with my eyes hanging out of my head and coffee all but going via IV into me.
And because he is tired during the day the tantrum factor has turned up to 10. This morning he refused his porridge so I gave him a bannana which he was eating until I sat beside him on the sofa- cue a huge meltdown in which he threw banana on sofa and smashed it with his foot. :mad::mad::mad::mad:

It was not a good morning for either of us.

bp

Unfortunately 'stern mammy voice' leads to laughter in our house - thinks it's brilliant! I did threaten being returned to holles st the other day (not seriously obviously) but that was wasted on a 19 month old!