Do you attend appointments alone?

Big Bag of Chips

Neyite wrote: »

You'll encounter many more strange views regarding pregnancy and babies from mums grannies and aunts. We were told not to make the baby giggle as laughing can kill them. Yes she was serious

Don't discount this!!! I occassionally have to step in and calm things down in our house because I fear the 6 month old might choke with the laughing some days

Big Bag of Chips

Just on topic... My husband came to all appointments on my first and second because he wasn't working at the time. Now he's in a job where they get 3 months off in the summer, so can't really be taking days here and there during the rest of the year So he only came to appointments he was actually off for.

indigo twist

pc7 wrote: »

My husband has come to all mine I would want him there, in the waiting room I've yet to see anyone alone at them.

I went to more appointments than most women, for various reasons, I attended Holles St publicly, I'd say maybe 90% of women were there alone.

lazygal

indigo twist wrote: »

I went to more appointments than most women, for various reasons, I attended Holles St publicly, I'd say maybe 90% of women were there alone.

That's so weird. I attended HS too, mainly private but had several public appointments for different things, and most women seemed to be there with a partner.

pc7

I'm Holles St private too that's where I'm seeing the partners

indigo twist

lazygal wrote: »

That's so weird. I attended HS too, mainly private but had several public appointments for different things, and most women seemed to be there with a partner.

Were you in the waiting room on the ground floor (down the ramp) or on the first floor?

Dolbert

There were more women in the Rotunda with partners than without today (routine check). I'm glad he didn't come with me tbh, I was seen for approximately two minutes after a total waiting time of nearly two hours!

lazygal

indigo twist wrote: »

Were you in the waiting room on the ground floor (down the ramp) or on the first floor?

I was in a few waiting areas (had a trace and other scans in the public section) in public, both in the ground floor holding area and other areas, and in the private rooms I'd say only one or two women attended alone.

Suucee

My shortest wait was 2 hours. Longest was nearly 4. It just wasnt possible for OH to take the time off.

Merkin

We had more scans and appointments than is usual but Mr. Merkin came to them all. Not my routine midwife appointments but everything else, yes. I'm fiercely independent and tend to fly solo with a lot of life's usual stuff but he really wanted to be as involved as possible with the pregnancy and it was just lovely to have him there and so involved with everything. He's here beside me at the moment feeding bubs and I think it's one of my favourite sights ever

LH2013

My husband only came for the two scans other than that I went on my own ! Anyway in Limerick your husband / partner can not come with you into the doc or midwife so no point dragging him along !

indigo twist

LH2013 wrote: »

My husband only came for the two scans other than that I went on my own ! Anyway in Limerick your husband / partner can not come with you into the doc or midwife so no point dragging him along !

Well that's pretty ridiculous. I wonder are they often challenged on that? Plenty of people prefer to bring a family member or partner even for non-medical appointments. Personally I was happy to go to my antenatal appointments alone, but I'd fully expect that my partner would have been welcome to attend too ... him being the baby's father, and all!

LH2013

indigo twist wrote: »

Well that's pretty ridiculous. I wonder are they often challenged on that? Plenty of people prefer to bring a family member or partner even for non-medical appointments. Personally I was happy to go to my antenatal appointments alone, but I'd fully expect that my partner would have been welcome to attend too ... him being the baby's father, andall!

(
I know right ! When they call you to meet midwife( for 30 secs )or the doc( for 2 minutes ) and your partner got up they were like no sorry just her :0
It didnt bother me but the babies dad should be included ! Maybe its just a public thing in Limerick ?

Penny Dreadful

My baby was born in September and I went to almost all of the appointments alone. My husband came to the first hospital appointment and to the anomaly scan and placental localisation scan.
The latter two were in the evening so there was no issue with him taking time off work. The first appointment was very special,all the more so as this was/ is our first baby and so there was no way hew as going to miss that.
Otherwise it made no sense to either of us for him to attend any more appointments than that. He has few enough days in terms of annual leave and he wanted to keep two weeks of that for when she was born and my pregnancy was fine, perfectly healthy and uneventful really so there was no need for him to be there.
I have to admit that I was quite puzzled as to the amount of men that went to each appointment with their wife/ girlfriend and at how many employers were willing to allow so much time off. Still the each their own and all that.

orchidsrpretty

My partner only came to the appointments where I felt I needed some backup. I was attending every two weeks so was a lot to ask of him. He came to all bar one scan which I was having every 4 weeks.

I attended a Monday clinic and Thursday scan day and nearly every woman had their partners with them.

Ms2011

My husband came to all my appointments on my first as he wasn't working at the time & I loved that support especially as it was all new & I was a bit like a deer in the headlights about it all.
Now I'm on my second & more confident my husband will just attend the scans, he is working this time round too so there isn't that option for him to attend anymore.

January

Limericks thinking is possible domestic abuse and if you wanted to speak to someone you could do so alone, in confidence.

It's the same in the Coombe at first appointment and Rotunda at first appointment too, there's a part where partners have to wait outside and they ask you about domestic violence.

eviltwin

I went on my own apart from scans, no point dragging him in unless its important.

mirrorwall14

I've gone on my own except scans but he did come with me yesterday coz I had to have liver function bile tests and we were both a little worried. Turns out I'm good and im not diabetic either but it was nice to have the company on a day like that

ariana`

Hubby came to 1st booking appointment (included a scan), 20wk anomoly scan and the last appointment (where i got a date for induction if it was going to be necessary) on both my 1st two. I've a booking appointment for no. 3 coming up soon and we were just discussing last night that it seems silly him coming when i know the drill and there's no scan at it anymore (there was for previous kids), it would be much more useful if he stays home and gives the others their breakfasts and drops them to school before going to work himself as otherwise i'd have to organise someone else to do this. I'd say if he makes it to the anomoly scan this time it will be as much as is possible. I did the domino scheme and at the midwives clinic there are never partners there, though i see a lot of partners at the consultants queues.

fiona-f

January wrote: »

Limericks thinking is ...e.

January, I'd like to suggest that you edit your post - if this is indeed the reason, then it is probably best not to post it on this type of thread.

Neyite

fiona-f wrote: »

January, I'd like to suggest that you edit your post - if this is indeed the reason, then it is probably best not to post it on this type of thread.

Another reason why they take you in on your own is that you may have medical history that may be relevant to your pregnancy that you cant say in front of your partner - say for instance the child isnt his, or maybe that you've had abortions in the past, or had a treated STI.

These kinds of things might be very relevant information to the health of you and your baby, and shouldnt be withheld because of someone sitting beside you.

January

fiona-f wrote: »

January, I'd like to suggest that you edit your post - if this is indeed the reason, then it is probably best not to post it on this type of thread.

There are signs up in some hospitals stating this... it's common knowledge not a secret...

LH2013

January wrote: »

There are signs up in some hospitals stating this... it's common knowledge not a secret...

It isnt just the first appointment ....... Partners are not allowed in when you meet midwife or doc at any appointment .... Didnt bother me but I do think its unfair to partners ... My friend goes to CUMH and at booking in she was only asked to be spoken to on her own for 5 minutes , her husband was made very welcome after this and the midwives spoke to him about what to expect etc much better treatment !

lazygal

My husband was welcome at all appointments and felt very included. I'd have felt very weird about having him excluded.

angeldelight

In the Coombe, hubby wasn't welcome when I had the medical history chat with midwife (and she did ask about domestic abuse, but very fleetingly) but has been more than welcome at the consultant appointments. Interestingly every other woman I've seen at the clinic has had their partner with them