The 11 "beautiful" girls on The Saturday Night Show Last Night.

chrissb8

If you like men/women with a bit more on them good for you. Don't try and make it seem "normal" to be overweight. You can look the way you want and there's no problem with it. I don't care really about things like that in general but don't belittle the rest of us who eat reasonably well and get exercise. Being overweight or obese is a large health problem. Instead of accommodating people with plus size clothes and all the other humdrum crap like that work on informing people on what to eat and how to live a healthy lifestyle. Instead of telling people to embrace their size.

murphyebass

Outside of them being obese for the most part they're not attractive either and that's when they are caked in make up etc

Got love the PC brigade. It's ok to be overweight/obese.

Stats tell us otherwise I'm afraid.

Oh btw too skinny is obviously wrong too but this idea of letting on it's ok to be fat is crazy. Great example to the kids.

Wibbs

Candie wrote: »

Seems drink and smoke acceptance is quite advanced in Ireland.

Eh that would be ballsology. Smoking is very much unacceptable. You do recall we were the first nation to ban the practice in indoor public spaces? Drink is equally frowned upon when the person is alcoholically "obese".

Hitchens wrote: »

why are gym bunnies always so miserable compared to normal people?

They're not. Seem to have about the same level of miserable or not as non gym bunnies IME.

As far as what one finds attractive that's down to personal taste and culture. I most certainly know enough men who actively prefer heavier women, anything below a size 14 is a no no. And no these aren't solitary neckbeards with no options. They have plenty of options yet go for fatter women. Personal taste. On the other side I know women who prefer men with "meat on their bones", IE a bit of a gut. Again personal preference. I would say - and this is a personal experience thang - that Irish people, men and women are culturally more accommodating of heavier people as a general thing. I mean overweight but not quite small planet sized.

Again IME, the Latins "fat shame" to beat the band*, as do many Eastern European cultures and Asian cultures. Way more than we might. This is reflected in the stats. EG Spanish and Italian women are on average a couple of sizes smaller than Irish women at 20 and have far higher levels of eating disorders(the Spanish have the highest levels in the EU). Interestingly the same Spanish and Italian women at 40 are the same size as Irish women at 40. It seems social pressure keeps them thin while young. So marry an Italian while young and you may get a shock down the line, marry an Irish woman and you you're less likely to get a surprise.

Most of all who da fuq cares? I myself prefer thin women. I don't have a shítfit if I see a fat woman. Why should I? Her size has feck all to do with me. It doesn't affect me or my choices. Or hers. If I was a guy who preferred fat woman, I wouldn't have a fit if I saw a thin women. Again why would I? I don't see the logic of it TBH. I could see the logic of it if I was going out with someone who was a size 8 and then ballooned into a size 16. Then I'd have an issue and ditto if I chose a size 16 women who shrank down to a size 8. That's a whole different thing.

TBH those who stay slim and trim and full of beans while single who then blob out in a relationship would be a major no no for me. No excuse there. Pure laziness and a tad cynical with it. Oh and before I get the flames, I've seen exactly the same thing happen with some men. Surely maintaining who you are size wise isn't to hard of an ask? To them, male or female, I'd say GT ever living FO.




*I saw that for myself with a Spanish ex. One of her mates was nicknamed "the little fatty/podgy"(Nice..) and she was a size 12 tops.

Tarzana

^^^^

Do you know you've pretty much written the same post verbatim on boards, oh I dunno, 50 times? Asterisks and all.

Wibbs wrote: »

Drink is equally frowned upon when the person is alcoholically "obese".

Whatever about smoking, this simply isn't true.

Wibbs wrote: »

TBH those who stay slim and trim and full of beans while single who then blob out in a relationship would be a major no no for me. No excuse there. Pure laziness and a tad cynical with it.

This is me right now, much heavier than when my relationship began 3 years ago. Could you outline what my cynical motives are? No backtracking, I'm
genuinely interested. Do enlighten me.

Wibbs wrote: »

Surely maintaining who you are size wise isn't to hard of an ask? To them, male or female, I'd say GT ever living FO.

Eh, a whole of factors can come into play there. Throwing a hissy fit at any weight gain, or even going up a size (which could happen a lot of people and isn't much), comes across a tad high maintenance, and TBH controlling. It can be that hard an ask sometimes, depending on circumstance. Love the throwaway token "Oh I've seen it happen to some men too!".

Me personally? I've just been through probably the mentally toughest two years of my life. During this time, thoughts of suicide weren't far away on many occasions. I'm carrying this dark period on my person for all to see. I don't drink too much or take loads of drugs when life gets tough. I tend to eat. I'm coming out of it now, and now must begin the daunting task of losing the weight. Thank fook I didn't have a partner like you during this time.

You might say "Oh well that's different" but how the hell do you know what's going in the lives of any of the people you've witnessed "blobbing out" (as you so charmingly put it) in their relationship?

_Whimsical_

Barely There wrote: »

Wouldn't find any of them particularly attractive, but perhaps as a counter-balance to the ridiculous body shape the media tend to push they serve some function.

At the end of the day, we're programmed to find healthy people more attractive than unhealthy people - it makes perfect evolutionary sense.

I'm ok with natural curves, I like them.

But rolls of fat?
Not for me Clive.
Not for me.

One eyed Jack wrote: »

There's a question - ARE we programmed? As human beings, are we actually programmed to find healthy people more attractive than unhealthy people?

That, to me at least, suggests that evolution as a concept has some specific purpose to propagate the species, and while finding healthy people attractive might make sense from a biological and reproductive evolutionary perspective...

Is that a reflection of reality?

(given that society is a social construction that evolved itself over time, independently of biological evolution).

Basically, to take your theory that makes sense to you, to it's extreme - we should all find the same person attractive. The reality is far, far more complex and complicated, to me at least, than -

"That opposite sex human being appears aesthetically healthy, we should procreate to propagate the species"

I'm just not sure human beings are actually 'designed' at all, let alone designed to function as you're suggesting.

It would seem to make sense that we should have an evolutionary bias towards desiring healthy people but the reality is far more complex. Examples range from the all around the world where cultural mores and notions of what a woman should be supersede the healthy ideal in terms of desirability.
In parts of Africa large/obese ladies are considered more attractive, perhaps because being overweight co-relates with wealth. In other parts of the continent young girls flatten their breast tissue and use weights to make it droop to be considered "sexy". In those cultures sagging breasts represent maturity and wisdom necessary for motherhood. In China tiny deformed feet from foot binding was once considered the mark of a beautiful woman and was highly desired.

In the west we are just as bad. We have fettishised and put unhealthy, unrealistic female body ideals on a pedestal for years. An example would be Courtney Cox and Jennifer Anniston. During their time in Friends they were the ultimate"dream girls" for men across the western world. Both of those women have admitted that their body weight was so low during their appearances on that show that their periods had completely stopped. Courtney Cox could not get pregnant and has said she was told that her low BMI may have permanently damaged her fertility and had to increase her weight immediately if she were ever to conceive. She did put on weight and subsequently her fertility problems cleared up. Other examples would be Kate Moss in her hay day when she was gaunt, bony and sported that "heroin chic" palour.Then there was Pamela Anderson who was at least 20% plastic!
We idolised ideals that proved the detriment to so many of our young girls and women who suffered from depression, low self esteem, malnourishment, anorexia,some who even lost their lives trying to live up to what we as a society told them a woman should be. There was nothing healthy about any of that and it wasnt fueled by natural male lust for female figures who might provide a healthy body to pass on their genes.

There's also nothing healthy about a media that fail to even acknowledging the existence of 40% of women who are over size ten in adverts. I'd be very glad to see all shapes and sizes reflected in the media I interact with.I think media should show us just that, reflections of reality, not aspirational ideals. If we saw different figures and reflections of ourselves and our friends/family etc maybe we could move away from being so heavily influenced, so mired with notions of aesthetic ideals that we could start to focus on being healthy.

Galwayguy35

Some of them have attractive faces and are certainly not ugly but they definately are very overweight, but it's up to everyone to look after their own body and if they don't want to lose weight then that's their choice.

Not a healthy choice though seeing as obesity increases the risk of heart disease.

Tarzana

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

An example would be Courtney Cox and Jennifer Anniston. During their time in Friends they were the ultimate"dream girls" for men across the western world. Both of those women have admitted that their body weight was so low during their appearances on that show that their periods had completely stopped.

It's interesting because when the show started, they were slim with gorgeous curvy but trim figures. And yet this still wasn't good enough and they felt the pressure to drop loads of weight. Hollywood sucks ASS. I believe at various times, both Scarlett Johansson and Jennifer Lawrence were considered chubby in Hollywood. I recall a Julianne Moore quote where she basically said that actresses are constantly hungry and have to get used to that.

Our models here in Ireland would be considered fat on the international modelling stage. Hence why they rarely graduate to successful international careers. But generally, I think they have great figures. Slim but with curves and whilst they would watch their figures, they'd clearly also enjoy a blowout meal every now and then.

FactCheck

Wibbs wrote: »

Surely maintaining who you are size wise isn't to hard of an ask?.

Over a long term relationship?

A couple could get together at 25. The guy plays a game of football with the lads once a week. Big drinking session say 2 out of 3 weeks, the odd pint here or there on a weeknight too. Occasionally goes for a run. More occasionally gets the odd takeaway.

At 25, he's got a BMI of 24ish doing that. Pretty normal. I mean he could be healthier but he's a normal dude.

If he's still doing exactly the same thing 10-15 years later? Man aging and metabolism will have caught up with him big time. This guy will be fat. Not obese, but fat.

If he wants to "maintain the size he is" he'll need to change his eating habits, drinking habits, and get in a lot more (and more effective) exercise. And good luck making time for more exercise in his thirties - exactly the time Mr and Mrs Longterm are starting to have kids.

It's even harder for Mrs Longterm as she's the one who had the kids. Maybe she won the genetic lottery and shrugs the weight off. More likely she didn't and doesn't.

Look I see what you were getting at, but you've wildly overstated it. Obviously longtermers need to keep making an effort. That's true at 25, 35, 85. But that effort will get harder and harder. If you stay exactly the same, you won't look the same. Any more than keeping the same haircut will stop you going bald.

The truth is that if someone middle aged wants to stay as trim as they did in their early twenties prime, they will need to spend considerably more time doing so. At the time of life when career and family is most demanding, it's not really reasonable to think people will start devoting three or four precious leisure hours to the gym.

So when people say "stay roughly thin as you were", they don't mean "stay the same". They mean "start eating better and exercising more with each passing year".

end of the road

murphyebass wrote: »

Got love the PC brigade.

who don't exist. everytime this mythical "pc brigade" is mentioned it invalidates the point being made

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

murphyebass wrote: »

Outside of them being obese for the most part they're not attractive either and that's when they are caked in make up etc

Got love the PC brigade. It's ok to be overweight/obese.

Stats tell us otherwise I'm afraid.

Oh btw too skinny is obviously wrong too but this idea of letting on it's ok to be fat is crazy. Great example to the kids.

PC Brigade told me it was not PC to be fat, or was he lying to me?

(Of course, by "fat" I mean anyone at lwast 5 lbs heavier than me at the time of consideration)

Bipolar Joe

Commenting on people's weight is tacky. Y'all are tacky Mother fuckers.

Shenshen

Shenshen wrote: »

You tend not to get threads about how Dara O'Briain is a bad role model for being clearly overweight, or Eamon Gilmore, or Jack Black...
No, it's the handful of females who decided to earn their living as plus size models. The ones you'll see on a talk show and then never again or TV.

People whose job relies on their appearance being more likely to have their appearance commented upon. Shocker.

Also have a look at comments about Reilly as Minister for Health. Or John Prescott in the UK. Or Eric Pickles, the new fat idiot for the "satirists" to use centuries-old jokes about. Look at any footballer with 10 pounds on him covering a 6-pack being called a fat bastard or a pudding.

RDM_83 again

Ok this article (I tend to use UK stats as we tend to follow similar trends and there is more studies)here represents better what I was trying to say earlier.

Self reported weights increased dramatically over time, but the weight at which people perceived themselves to be overweight also rose significantly. In 1999, 81% of overweight participants correctly identified themselves as overweight compared with 75% in 2007, demonstrating a decrease in sensitivity in the self diagnosis of overweight

Basically, while its a positive that people can feel comfortable in their own skin, do things like this have a wider negative effect.

One eyed Jack wrote: »

IS the population actually getting heavier though, or are we just beginning to notice it more?

Basically as far as I know, the population has got heavier to a certain extent, but the population that is obese has got much larger.
Another English survey

One eyed Jack wrote: »

In the last 30 years or so, Western society has become obsessed with aesthetics, body consciousness and imagery, and health care standards. The health care industry has exploded, cosmetic surgery is as easily available as a quick face peel on your coffee break, and gymnasiums and health clubs are packed to capacity. As a result of better education and diets, people are becoming more health conscious naturally, and on the flipside of that, people are becoming more aware of people around them in society who aren't so health conscious (I think is it a third of Americans are considered overweight or morbidly obese? That still means that two thirds are a healthy weight?).

You say the tools haven't changed, but come on now, Western society has more information and education about making healthy lifestyle choices than at any other time in human history. I'm looking at clothes sizes and I'm looking at people trying to shrink themselves into those clothes sizes. I'm looking at young girls wearing even less clothes than ever to show off to their peers, I'm looking at young boys wearing tee shirts when they go swimming because they're ashamed of their bodies and they don't want girls to notice they don't have a six pack. I'm looking at people of all ages across the whole demographic spectrum, obsessing about the latest on-trend fashions and wanting to emulate celebrities rather than accepting that they don't have personal trainers who are celebrities in their own right! (That Shaun T, "Insanity" DVD fitness program, selling like bloody hot cakes, it's almost impossible to avoid anyone talking about it!), I'm looking at a mate of mine who set up a Zumba studio about three years ago, now he's got franchises up and down the country and he and his team are in constant demand even for corporate clients! I'm looking at my own brother who has a franchise of gymnasiums (and men only ones at that!), his business is growing at a phenomenal rate, and I can't tell you a whole lot about how gymnasiums operate, but it's like going into a salon and they're selling you a mind blowingly expensive facial treatment - he's selling kegs of nutrition powder supplements, drinks, bars, I mean, I could go on all night! It really is a whole lifestyle, and albeit healthy and all, you can't help but get the feeling these people are obsessive because the healthy lifestyle and being in the peak of their physical and mental health makes them feel great about themselves, and they're incredibly competitive about it!

There's a huge shift in society and social attitudes towards attaining physical perfection and internal health, but for me personally, I really am left wondering - yes, they certainly appear happier and healthier, but then again, so did Patrick Bateman (fictional character I know, but you get the idea - the obsessive nature of it all isn't just individual physical perfection and health any more, but now they have to be better, more competitive, than everyone else!). I'm just not sure it's mentally healthy, nor if it's actually driving society to a good place (Wall-E was one possible extreme, this seems to be the other!).

I've a few friends who have done pretty well for themselves from the fitness industry too having got in ahead of the curve in terms of franchise and trends. I think whats happening is we're basically beginning to emulating the American model, where your either really putting in the effort and building your life around being fit or conversely if you can't reach that level completely not caring about weight at all.

One eyed Jack wrote: »

See? You just did it there yourself! Are two people ever actually the same? Are they mentally, financially, aesthetically the same? The BMI scale is meant to be an indicator for populations, not individuals, and it only measures one thing - body mass. It doesn't give any indication or otherwise of a person's individual health. It's good for averages, yes, but people don't measure themselves against the average, they measure themselves against the magic figure.

I know its a very rough gauge and doesn;t take into account weight distribution but its next to impossible to evaluate all the individual factors, but I think that those people who are vulnerable to the idea of trying to achieve an ideal are always vulnerable, at least the BMI guidelines will generally tell someone if they are underweight and thats harmful.

Interesting and depressing fact, Dinitrophenol one of the first magic weightloss pills (1920's/1930's) and one that led directly to the USA regulating patent medicines has apparently started to make a comeback.

Tarzana wrote: »

Me personally? I've just been through probably the mentally toughest two years of my life. During this time, thoughts of suicide weren't far away on many occasions. I'm carrying this dark period on my person for all to see. I don't drink too much or take loads of drugs when life gets tough. I tend to eat. I'm coming out of it now, and now must begin the daunting task of losing the weight.

I know its probably bad using your personal experience to make this point, but I really think this is why being Overweight doesn't correlate to life expectancy the way its expected to, I chain smoke when stressed which has a much higher negative effect than over eating and in general I think mental well being has a vastly underestimated effect on health, hell one of the biggest killers for my demographic (males 30 and under) is suicide.

The thing is though when (sensible) people are making comments about obesity and body image, I don't think they are coming from an individualized Fat People are lazy and stupid stand point lets tell them so they can be ashamed, its about how these things are viewed by society and how we are on track to have a major issue in a few years time.

gammygils

Of course. They all have lovely bottoms.

darkpagandeath

Is the average women's size in Ireland not size 16, We have a serious problem coming down the line. And you cant tell me we have unusually tall sections of the population.

DoYouEvenLift

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

Commenting on people's weight is tacky. Y'all are tacky Mother fuckers.

What if they were complaining about their weight and sought your opinion? Would you not be honest and advise them to at least get to a healthy weight for themselves?

Gelatomela

One eyed Jack wrote: »

There's a question - ARE we programmed? As human beings, are we actually programmed to find healthy people more attractive than unhealthy people?

That, to me at least, suggests that evolution as a concept has some specific purpose to propagate the species, and while finding healthy people attractive might make sense from a biological and reproductive evolutionary perspective...

Is that a reflection of reality?

(given that society is a social construction that evolved itself over time, independently of biological evolution).

Basically, to take your theory that makes sense to you, to it's extreme - we should all find the same person attractive. The reality is far, far more complex and complicated, to me at least, than -

"That opposite sex human being appears aesthetically healthy, we should procreate to propagate the species"

I'm just not sure human beings are actually 'designed' at all, let alone designed to function as you're suggesting.

I don't think you know much about evolution.

suicide_circus

I'm not exactly svelte myself, had to run for 5 minutes the other day and nearly died, so I wouldn't dare slag off these women but anything that normalises obesity is a bad thing.

FactCheck

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

What if they were complaining about their weight and sought your opinion? Would you not be honest and advise them to at least get to a healthy weight for themselves?

Well personally I'd tell someone like that to talk to a doctor. But then I'm not desperate for someone to boss around. What relevance is that anyway? These women aren't complaining or seeking anyone's opinion.

Shenshen

Self reported weights increased dramatically over time, but the weight at which people perceived themselves to be overweight also rose significantly. In 1999, 81% of overweight participants correctly identified themselves as overweight compared with 75% in 2007, demonstrating a decrease in sensitivity in the self diagnosis of overweight

I have a sneaky suspicion that this simply demonstrates that the goalposts have shifted.

In 1990, my doctor told me that my ideal weight is my hegiht in cm -100, and I should not be weighing anything less than that as it would be dangerous.
Today, BMI tells me that this is 25 and therefore borderline dangerous.

JuliusCaesar

Shenshen wrote: »

In 1990, my doctor told me that my ideal weight is my hegiht in cm -100, and I should not be weighing anything less than that as it would be dangerous.
Today, BMI tells me that this is 25 and therefore borderline dangerous.

100 what? stone? pounds? kilos?

Shenshen

JuliusCaesar wrote: »

100 what? stone? pounds? kilos?

cm, as posted.

darkpagandeath

Shenshen wrote: »

cm, as posted.

How much does a CM weigh these days ?

Wibbs

Tarzana wrote: »

^^^^

Do you know you've pretty much written the same post verbatim on boards, oh I dunno, 50 times? Asterisks and all.

One does try for consistency.

Whatever about smoking, this simply isn't true.

So you were wrong about smoking? OK one down. More and more alcohol and alcohol abuse is being discussed in the Irish context. It's not near smoking yet, but it's getting there.

Eh, a whole of factors can come into play there. Throwing a hissy fit at any weight gain, or even going up a size (which could happen a lot of people and isn't much), comes across a tad high maintenance, and TBH controlling. It can be that hard an ask sometimes, depending on circumstance. Love the throwaway token "Oh I've seen it happen to some men too!".

Not throwaway. I have. Assuming it's a token statement says more about your perceptions and what you want to read. As for "throwing a hissy fit"? If a partner started drinking heavily because of a problem in their lives, I'd support them if they got help and stopped or cut down on the gargle. If they didn't even with my support? Nope, sorry. I'd see food "addiction" similarly.

You might say "Oh well that's different" but how the hell do you know what's going in the lives of any of the people you've witnessed "blobbing out" (as you so charmingly put it) in their relationship?

I don't, but either there are a large number of men and women who have a problem like yours, or more likely many if not most of them just get lazy and "settle down".

FactCheck wrote: »

A couple could get together at 25. The guy plays a game of football with the lads once a week. Big drinking session say 2 out of 3 weeks, the odd pint here or there on a weeknight too. Occasionally goes for a run. More occasionally gets the odd takeaway.

At 25, he's got a BMI of 24ish doing that. Pretty normal. I mean he could be healthier but he's a normal dude.

If he's still doing exactly the same thing 10-15 years later? Man aging and metabolism will have caught up with him big time. This guy will be fat. Not obese, but fat.

If he wants to "maintain the size he is" he'll need to change his eating habits, drinking habits, and get in a lot more (and more effective) exercise. And good luck making time for more exercise in his thirties - exactly the time Mr and Mrs Longterm are starting to have kids.

I simply don't buy that. Having seen friends aging from 20 to nigh on 50, IMHO the "man aging and metabolism" argument just doesn't hold water for the vast majority of men(and significantly less than for women). The science would back this up. The hormonal profile of a 25 year old man is nigh on identical for a 35 year old man. Take testosterone, after around 30 that drops by on average just 1% per year. A man blobbing up from 25 to 35 has other stuff going on. Simply put and I've seen this with my own eyes, they're eating more and moving less. The ones who stay a stone or so around their younger weight don't change their younger habits. Guys I know who spotted the gut creep and decided to reverse it didn't go mad in the gym or become vegans, they just dialed back what they were eating and the weight came off. It used to be called middle aged spread, because it came along in middle age. Unless these days middle age starts at 28...

Hell, look at photos of our great grandparents. They were having kids and didn't have gyms or diets to nearly the same degree as today. How many fat ones can you see? More, how many do you see with middle age spread at 30? Precious few and again the science backs this up. Clothes sizes for men and women have changed and changed quite a bit even since the 1960's. We've gotten taller and wider in the last half century. In women the hourglass shape has decreased and waists have grown. Even clothes size labeling has changed. A 1960's size 10 is a different size 10 today.

homemadecider

Shenshen wrote: »

I have a sneaky suspicion that this simply demonstrates that the goalposts have shifted.

In 1990, my doctor told me that my ideal weight is my hegiht in cm -100, and I should not be weighing anything less than that as it would be dangerous.
Today, BMI tells me that this is 25 and therefore borderline dangerous.

Your ideal weight is 100 cm? What?

Tilly

homemadecider wrote: »

Your ideal weight is 100 cm? What?

Smile and nod....

Wibbs

I think her ideal weight would be her height in CM's minus 100 which would give you a figure in Kgs? I've just done my stats and it seems about right for an average man at that height, though would add a couple of stones onto my actual weight. I've a slight frame though.

Billy86

myshirt wrote: »

Being morbidly obese should not be celebrated.

And that is exactly what this is.

Fat chicks do more stuff and all that, but this is gone too far.

I didn't see the show because it's a terrible TV program, but I decided to give them a quick Google to see what people were on about. Have to admit I don't find most of them particularly attractive, but you may have been wrong blanketing them as "morbidly obese"... let's just say we'll have to agree to disagree!

http://scontent-a.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/10693738_534012510064023_1570289270_n.jpg
http://scontent-b.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/10623961_492011720934486_129644837_n.jpg

FactCheck

Wibbs wrote: »

I simply don't buy that. Having seen friends aging from 20 to nigh on 50, IMHO the "man aging and metabolism" argument just doesn't hold water for the vast majority of men(and significantly less than for women). The science would back this up. The hormonal profile of a 25 year old man is nigh on identical for a 35 year old man. Take testosterone, after around 30 that drops by on average just 1% per year. A man blobbing up from 25 to 35 has other stuff going on. Simply put and I've seen this with my own eyes, they're eating more and moving less. The ones who stay a stone or so around their younger weight don't change their younger habits. Guys I know who spotted the gut creep and decided to reverse it didn't go mad in the gym or become vegans, they just dialed back what they were eating and the weight came off. It used to be called middle aged spread, because it came along in middle age. Unless these days middle age starts at 28...

Lol, I didn't mean "man aging and metabolism", it was "man, aging and metabolism" as in, oh man, that aging.

First of all, I would consider being "a stone or so" heavier at 40 than you were at 25 gaining weight. You seem to be suggesting above that that's not what you're talking about? If so, we may not actually disagree. My point is that a lot of 25 years old will have BMIs of 24ish living a "typical" lifestyle and that if they keep that lifestyle up they will gain one or two stone by the time they're 40. That will make them overweight.

I guess this is the war of the anecdotes, as I also have seen a lot of friends go from teens to middle age, and the reality is that the typical Irish little-bit-of-exercise, lots-of-pints-and-takeaways - most people can get away with that in while they're under 25. Over 25, not so much.

Ask any poster here who's a few years over 25. Can they party as hard as they could five years ago? Hell to the no. Hangovers are worse, they are tired more easily.

Do you do much competitive sport? The 35 year olds cannot keep up with the 25 year olds on the exact same level of training. They couldn't keep up with their old selves either. With each passing year, maintaining or surpassing a PB takes more and more effort and training. Likewise recovering from injuries. The old body just can't take the same treatment. It's all very well to say "well testosterone is only dropping by etc and hormones you know etc". The reality is that you can't do at 35 what you could at 25. That's as true if you're Brian O'Driscoll or if you're wheezing around a 10K.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not going gently into the good night. I weigh less than I did when my husband and I met at 18. But our lifestyle is massively different to then. If I could object to my husband "blobbing up" (what an unpleasant phrase), could I object to him making significant changes to our diet? Spending a good three extra hours a week exercising (time that isn't going on maintaining the marriage, his friendships, or the kids)?

I think it would be as churlish of me to object to that as it would be if I objected to the fact that he is balding at a rate of knots. He's not 18 any more. I'd be a muppet if I expected him to look the same. I expect an effort, but the reality is that his prime is behind him and if I want 4+ decades more of marriage, lookswise things are headed downhill. He's very attractive to me but he looks very different now and he will look different still in 20 years.

I think that people who insist that their partner's appearance must be "maintained" either have very little experience of aging, or very little experience of long-term relationships. And I mean actual long term relationships - as in 10+ years, measured in decades, intending to spend the rest of their lives together, not the boards idea of long-term which is apparently anything over 2 or 3 years. I mean the real long haul.

darkpagandeath

Billy86 wrote: »

I didn't see the show because it's a terrible TV program, but I decided to give them a quick Google to see what people were on about. Have to admit I don't find most of them particularly attractive, but you may have been wrong blanketing them as "morbidly obese"... let's just say we'll have to agree to disagree!

http://scontent-a.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/10693738_534012510064023_1570289270_n.jpg
http://scontent-b.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/10623961_492011720934486_129644837_n.jpg

I would consider that one of them was 24 stone at one point that's morbidly obese. 2 to 3 points over your bmi max anything else your just making stuff up. And you would really need to look into your diet.