Access Over Christmas

dan759

Hi all,

Need some advice on an issue.

My brother and his ex have gone through quite a bad break up. Access to his son, has been turbulent throughout. For the most part, my brother and mother, would collect my nephew on a Friday and drop him back on a Sunday. For the past few months, this hasn't been happening, with my brothers ex completely refusing access since August.

Both have been recommended a mediation session to come up with terms of access, with the recommendation that the father should be given adequate access to his child as he is no risk etc.

Anyway, to today. I currently don't live in the country, and rarely get to see my nephew, it is one of the only reasons I come home. I've sent 3 texts in the past week to my brothers ex asking if we will be seeing him at all over christmas, none of which have been responded to. My brother and mum both say if they try ring or text, they get no response either. It has been 3-4 months since any of us have heard of how my Nephew is doing or had any update. I'm genuinely concerned at this rate and want to get involved (I've not been involved in any of the procedures to date, my mum and brother have had to go to 'Family conventions' with social workers and with the Ex's entire family there).

I'm pretty annoyed that she can withhold access entirely over christmas. My brother seems to have given up and is working right up to christmas eve so is struggling to try do anything about it.

Would it be inappropriate for me to get involved now? Surely she can't refuse to communicate about the child at all?

Any advice would be hugely appreciated. If i've left things out, please ask below.

Thanks. D

January

Yes it would be inappropriate for you to get involved. He needs to go to court now and get it sorted but it will be after Christmas when it is.

Big Bag of Chips

Like it or not it's nothing to do with you. You or your mother don't have any automatic right to access to the child. You don't know what game she is playing, but your interference could ne used against him in court if she says she feels harassed by you and other members of your family.

The only point of contact should be your brother. If he wants to sort out access he needs to go to court and get court ordered access. As a first step mediation is suggested, if that doesn't work court is then the only other option if the mother refuses to communicate.

Ctrl Alt Delete

Big Bag of Chips wrote: »

Like it or not it's nothing to do with you. You or your mother don't have any automatic right to access to the child.

Actually just to pick you up on that under the Children Act 1997 grandparents can apply for leave to apply for access to the child through the District Court.

Big Bag of Chips

Yes, they can apply for leave to apply for access. It's a two step procedure. First get permission to apply for access, and then the application for access.

They don't have an automatic right to access to the child.

Edit: On the point that Ctrl Alt Del made, your mother, after Christmas, could start her own ball rolling to apply for her own access to the child. Or maybe wait and see what happens with your brother first.

dan759

Thanks all,

Pretty much just re-affirmed what I'd been thinking. Just a disgrace how long it takes for a court date, and that all the in-between leaves her with the most power. Its been 4 months since any of us heard even an update how the wee man is doing

Men need more representation when it comes to their children, this country's laws are backwards.