General Chat Thread (PLEASE READ POST #1)

Toots

Esterhase wrote: »

There's.... there's a board game? :eek:
Sounds like the kind of game that might pop up at some hen parties this year!

Oh there's not just a board game! There's a whole range of "adult toys" also. Feckin cringeworthy altogether! Some highlights include:

The Foil Packet Condoms (12 pack)
We Aim To Please Vibrating Bullet
Inner Goddess Silver Pleasure Balls
Please, Sir Flogger
Spank Me Please Spanking Ruler
You. Are. Mine. Metal Handcuffs
Charlie Tango Classic Vibrator
Twitchy Palm Spanking Paddle
Christian's Grey Tie

The worst part is I'm not making this up. These are actually just a handful of products from what seems to be a massive range. Oh and the cherry on the cake, the quote from E.L. James on the packaging:

"I'm so excited that the toys I described in the books have come to life!"

Yeah, cos nobody had ever heard of a vibrator before the release of 50 Shades. Puke.

Esterhase

I almost want the Inner Goddess Silver Pleasure Balls just to own a box with that name written on it!

I bet they are selling like mad, so I hope they're at least decent quality gizmos... Really struggling not to Google at work right now. I want to know what the 'spanking ruler' looks like. I'm imagining the type of blue plastic ruler I had at school with 'Spank Me Please' written where 'Shatter Resistant' should be. :pac:

Scarinae

Esterhase wrote: »

I want to know what the 'spanking ruler' looks like. I'm imagining the type of blue plastic ruler I had at school with 'Spank Me Please' written where 'Shatter Resistant' should be. :pac:

When I was eight or so I had a Bendy Puffin Ruler (a bendy ruler from the Puffin Book Club), which some of the boys in my class discovered was really good for hitting people with and it made a loud SMACK noise. So that's what I'm imagining - maybe without the puffin picture on it though

liz lemoncello

Esterhase wrote: »

I almost want the Inner Goddess Silver Pleasure Balls just to own a box with that name written on it!...

If I ever have an all-girl heavy metal band, we will be known as "The Inner Goddess Silver Pleasure Balls".

Esterhase

Yeah what you want is a nice flexible ruler that you can bend back a bit, resulting in a good satisfying bang.

Like one of these bad boys:


liz lemoncello - I can't wait to buy your merchandise! I will wear those tshirts and blindfold/tie related accessories with pride.

fits

Best thread title ever!!!!


Ex Crashed My Wedding – DH arrested (My Real Life Wedding Nightmare)

Read more: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/ex-crashed-my-wedding-dh-arrested-my-real-life-wedding-nightmare/#ixzz3WetX4Syw

Toots

Jesus wept, that poor woman (and the husband) I see on her last post that the venue is pressing charges on psycho ex for trespassing.

My cousin was going out with a guy for a few years, and they broke up - nothing acrimonious, but he was devastated (she initiated the breakup) Not long after they broke up, a new guy started where my cousin was working and it was love at first sight after a fairly whirlwind romance - less than a year I think - they got engaged, and the date was set for about 6 months after that.

The night before the wedding, my cousin's ex showed up at the house (she was still living at home) in a last ditch attempt to win her back. Luckily she wasn't there, because she and her sisters were out doing some last minute bits before the wedding. My uncle was less than impressed, and told him to take a hike. Nobody told her about it until after they got back from the honeymoon, because they didn't want her head all over the place on the wedding day. Luckily she saw the funny side of it, and she's been happily married to her husband for about 18 years. We were all saying though that it was SO lucky he didn't do anything mad like show up at the reception!

January

Something similar happened at my wedding, except it wasn't a psycho ex it was just a psycho.

We got married local to where we live and where I grew up. My dad met two girls from the area who himself and my mam would have been friendly with their mam before she died and when they asked what he was doing in the hotel (it was new years eve) he told them I was getting married and invited them in to see me and say hello.

Unfortunately they decided to stay and hound the dance floor and rather than ask them to leave (I didn't want a scene, silly me!) I let them stay said as long as they weren't causing trouble they were grand.

Well about 15 minutes after midnight I was outside with my husband he was having a smoke and next of all I see the DJ legging it past me saying he needed to get security (thank you btw because I know he posts here) and I find out that something happened on the dance floor someone must have bumped into someone or something but the girl bit one of my groomsmen as he was trying to get her out of the room, bit an aunt on the chin, punched a cousin in the eye and had thrown a glass and knocked out another aunties teeth!! She had to be dragged out of the room by security and pulled nearly every bar table and tree decoration down with her as she went!

It was horrible, I thought our wedding was ruined but thankfully the guests that were still there sat with myself and my husband until nearly 4.30 am and reassured us they had a fab time and not to let one psycho ruin my wedding.

LynnGrace

Toots wrote: »

The night before the wedding, my cousin's ex showed up at the house (she was still living at home) in a last ditch attempt to win her back. Luckily she wasn't there, because she and her sisters were out doing some last minute bits before the wedding. My uncle was less than impressed, and told him to take a hike. Nobody told her about it until after they got back from the honeymoon, because they didn't want her head all over the place on the wedding day. Luckily she saw the funny side of it, and she's been happily married to her husband for about 18 years. We were all saying though that it was SO lucky he didn't do anything mad like show up at the reception!

This made me think of the scene in a Friends where Rachel flies to London, determined to tell Ross that she loves him.
The ex must have been really anxious to get her back, I think your uncle did the right thing though.

Neyite

January wrote: »

It was horrible, I thought our wedding was ruined but thankfully the guests that were still there sat with myself and my husband until nearly 4.30 am and reassured us they had a fab time and not to let one psycho ruin my wedding.

I look back on your wedding and there's so much beautiful memories to remember from that day. I'd pretty much forgotten about yer wan. I'm sure you haven't though.:mad: Rest assured, she did NOT spoil your wedding. I for one, had an absolute blast!

Neyite

LynnGrace wrote: »

This made me think of the scene in a Friends where Rachel flies to London, determined to tell Ross that she loves him.
The ex must have been really anxious to get her back, I think your uncle did the right thing though.

Or he was a possessive nutter?

I know its the norm in Tellyland for every single wedding to be disrupted in some way by an ex or some other disaster, but in reality, that behaviour is insane.

LynnGrace

Neyite wrote: »

Or he was a possessive nutter?

I know its the norm in Tellyland for every single wedding to be disrupted in some way by an ex or some other disaster, but in reality, that behaviour is insane.

Oh yeah, I agree, I had phrased it more strongly at first ...

LynnGrace

January wrote: »

Something similar happened at my wedding, except it wasn't a psycho ex it was just a psycho.

It was horrible, I thought our wedding was ruined but thankfully the guests that were still there sat with myself and my husband until nearly 4.30 am and reassured us they had a fab time and not to let one psycho ruin my wedding.

What a rotten thing to happen!

Toots

Neyite wrote: »

Or he was a possessive nutter?

I know its the norm in Tellyland for every single wedding to be disrupted in some way by an ex or some other disaster, but in reality, that behaviour is insane.

I think in this case the guy was really genuinely in love with my cousin and was really devastated that she was getting married. I she was "the one" for him, and he'd always held out hope that they'd get back together and live happily ever after.

Neyite

Toots wrote: »

I think in this case the guy was really genuinely in love with my cousin and was really devastated that she was getting married. I she was "the one" for him, and he'd always held out hope that they'd get back together and live happily ever after.

Sadly, I had an ex like that. We lasted barely a year and it took him years to stop pining over me, and tbh, it was no great romance in the first place, and I'm about as special as the next person, he'd just built up this in his head. I met him 10 years later when I was 29 and he was still lamenting our break up. I was a totally different person to the one he thought he remembered. What a waste of time for him.

Thumby

Came across this thread last week i think it was, and started reading it. I am now addicted to reading the wedding disasters on that other website thanks to this thread, found a corker of a one but not sure if i can link to it or if that's still allowed. If someone lets me know if that's ok, i will. It's got to be the most grabbiest money hungry wedding thread i've ever come across and thanks to the boards wedding forum that's a lot in recent weeks

allym

Thumby wrote: »

Came across this thread last week i think it was, and started reading it. I am now addicted to reading the wedding disasters on that other website thanks to this thread, found a corker of a one but not sure if i can link to it or if that's still allowed. If someone lets me know if that's ok, i will. It's got to be the most grabbiest money hungry wedding thread i've ever come across and thanks to the boards wedding forum that's a lot in recent weeks

Doooo it

Thumby

allym wrote: »

Doooo it

:D

You're really twisting my arm here, I've no choice now...

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/2138616-Oh-do-I-have-a-new-low-in-wedding-poems-for-you?pg=1&messages=100

allym

Thumby wrote: »

:D

You're really twisting my arm here, I've no choice now...

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/2138616-Oh-do-I-have-a-new-low-in-wedding-poems-for-you?pg=1&messages=100

I knew it would be mumsnet :pac:


Edit: I just read it. Holy god!!

Thumby

I know. Asking for money before the wedding is bad enough, throw in the fact that guests had to pay for their own dinner and then get that email, it just beggers belief. I wouldn't be able to hold myself in check.

Toots

It's grand to post a link, once there's nothing that'll identify the couple.

XxMCRxBabyxX

After a while I just started reading all the posts as if they were a poem!

Toots

Ah mumsnet, once again you fail to disappoint!

Thumby

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

After a while I just started reading all the posts as if they were a poem!

So glad i'm not the only one lol.

Ah toots, this forum has me addicted to mumsnet wedding threads. They're all nuts!!!

But seriously talk about having a neck like a jockeys nether regions.

allym

Just found this

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1008339-Worst-behaviour-seen-at-a-wedding


Oh. My. God! Some of the stories in this are insane!!

Thumby

allym wrote: »

Just found this one

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1008339-Worst-behaviour-seen-at-a-wedding?pg=7&order=


Oh. My. God! Some of the stories in this are insane!!

Im getting a 404 error 😢😢

allym

Thumby wrote: »

Im getting a 404 error 😢😢

Sorry I think I fixed it there!

Thumby

allym wrote: »

Sorry I think I fixed it there!

Nope. Feck it could have done with tbe giggle too. I know its wrong to laugh at others misfortune but even jesus wept at these posts lol.

liz lemoncello

Thumby, it works for me.

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1008339-Worst-behaviour-seen-at-a-wedding?pg=7&order=

Thumby

liz lemoncello wrote: »

Thumby, it works for me.

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1008339-Worst-behaviour-seen-at-a-wedding?pg=7&order=

Woohoo its working now. A bit of light sunday morning reading with my brekkie.

Hubby to be doesnt understand why im so fascinated with mumsnet right now. So ive told him i'm finding out what not to do so i dont end up becoming a bridezilla. He laughed at me then.

Addle

I think I've finally succumbed to unreasonable wedding behaviour, and I'm very disappointed in myself, but also surprisingly hurt.

I was single for a lot of weddings and went to a lot alone.
Finally have a fab guy in my life and am after being given an invite with no plus guest.
I've already a double room booked in the hotel!

I was hand given the invite, opened it straight away and expressed my surprise.
The bride to be, a good friend, explained that they were tight for numbers and thought I wouldn't mind going alone as 'I was used to it' and 'wouldn't kick up a fuss'.
I seem to be the only guest in a relationship who hasn't been given a plus one.
I can't not go, that'd be silly.
I think I'm really going to miss my guy on the day. ��

Gatica

That's absolutely horrible of your friend to do to you. You've absolutely every right to be upset. Just because you'd been single going before doesn't make it right to now single you out (no pun intended) for excluding your OH. I have never thought it was nice to exclude partners anyway, unless it was a group of friends going together to a wedding, but then they'd all be given single invites.

It seems really unfair and it would probably be hard to decline the invite. If you're not particularly wanting to go, is there anything else you could arrange for the same day and use that as an excuse? Maybe a weekend away with your bf? :P say he'd it booked for weeks as a surprise for you

ChampagnePop

I've been that excluded "new" partner before (18 months), and I found it very hurtful at the time and they've both said since how bad they feel about excluding me from the big day.

We're all good friends now but I'll definitely not be doing it to my wedding guests.

Toots

How long are you with your partner? TBH her reasoning for it is really sh!tty if you're the only one there who hasn't been given a +1, if they had a blanket 'no +1s' rule that's fair enough. Also, eh hello? Tact??

Reminds me of a wedding I was at a couple of years ago, and they were only giving +1s to married couples. I made the cut because I'd been married to my hubby about 6 months at the time, but my SIL's partner of over 10 years wasn't invited!!!

Addle

We're together as long as the couple who are marrying!
I'm the first to advise to limit expectations and avoid disappointment, but I think I'm actually shocked rather than disappointed now!
The b2b hasn't said anything about him joining the party later either.
I'm just put out. I'll get over it.

Neyite

Addle wrote: »

The bride to be, a good friend, explained that they were tight for numbers and thought I wouldn't mind going alone as 'I was used to it' and 'wouldn't kick up a fuss'.
I seem to be the only guest in a relationship who hasn't been given a plus one.

So by her logic...you'll always be invited alone to every wedding "because you are used to it". If she is a good friend, I'd probably suck it up, but if you get a chance to say it to her afterwards that you were hurt, you should.

Toots wrote: »

Reminds me of a wedding I was at a couple of years ago, and they were only giving +1s to married couples. I made the cut because I'd been married to my hubby about 6 months at the time, but my SIL's partner of over 10 years wasn't invited!!!

My 'MIL' still differentiates. I'm 12 years with the OH, we have a child. I'm still not considered fully part of the family until we marry.

XxMCRxBabyxX

I had a similar issue with my cousins wedding. It's abroad and I was told that only cousins were invited and not their partners. That was grand with me until I (well, my dad) found out that another cousin's OH was invited. All of a sudden the rule had been changed to only partners that lived together. Hardly seemed fair to me when I'm with my OH 9 years and the couple living together are together 3. I want going to do anything about it but my dad was very unimpressed and had a "chat" with Granny that ended with an invite for OH. (Note: I had no idea that he was doing that and was pretty annoyed at him for causing that trouble!)

SarahMollie

Neyite wrote: »

So by her logic...you'll always be invited alone to every wedding "because you are used to it". If she is a good friend, I'd probably suck it up, but if you get a chance to say it to her afterwards that you were hurt, you should.

I see what you're saying, but actually I'd be inclined to go back and have another word with her before the big day.

Just point out that because you've been alone at so many weddings, that the prospect of bringing a partner to this one is extra special to you, so actually her logic is completely opposite to the way you really feel.

I know venues have limits, but people always drop out and I really don't think 1 person will make a difference to her, but it certainly will to you.

If you only say it to her after the fact, she won't have an opportunity to put it right, and you may always harbor a bit of ill will.

If shes a good friend and you approach her nicely, she'll accommodate you and this will all be forgotten about.

Milly33

Bit mad alright but try not to like dis your friend because of it. Could be lots of reasons weddings sometimes just drive people mad. Id ask her would they mind if perhaps your boyfriend could join ye after the meal..

ChewChew

This happened to me a few years ago and it hurt a lot and was really upsetting. I was expected to go to a wedding in a different country where I'd know very few people without my plus one. I was told by the bride that they weren't inviting and paying for the meal of people they did not know and if I wanted my plus one to come he'd have to wait in the bar/room until after the meal and then could join us

As a result, I will not put one person at my wedding in that position.

ChampagnePop

ChewChew wrote: »

This happened to me a few years ago and it hurt a lot and was really upsetting. I was expected to go to a wedding in a different country where I'd know very few people without my plus one. I was told by the bride that they weren't inviting and paying for the meal of people they did not know and if I wanted my plus one to come he'd have to wait in the bar/room until after the meal and then could join us

As a result, I will not put one person at my wedding in that position.

Did you go???

I would think you need to give all guests a plus one if they don't know any other people well.

ChewChew

ChampagnePop wrote: »

Did you go???

I would think you need to give all guests a plus one if they don't know any other people well.

I didn't.

SarahMollie

Don't blame you ChewChew.

I was the partner not invited last year. Wedding was in Ireland about 2 hours away, so involved an overnight stay. Needless to say I was not happy, but didn't want my OH not to go on my account, as the only thing worse than what had already happened, would be for him to resent me for it.

Long story short, she ended up inviting me about 4 weeks out after some of their original guests must have backed out but by then I'd made plans to go to France with my friends so I declined her kind offer to subsidize her wedding and make up the numbers attend her wedding.

baby and crumble

I understand not giving random +1's to people who will have loads of friends there anyway but to not give an established relationship an invite is a bit ****ty.

SarahMollie

Exactly, I think you have to make a judgement call if a relationship is very new, but we were living together at this point so in my mind, I'd never invite one partner from a cohabiting couple and not the other, specifically because I now know first hand that it causes consternation.

I think its maybe different if you're inviting a gang from work and the wedding is local, but expecting people to travel alone, book single rooms etc is a bit rubbish.

Addle

I'd never not go-I'm saying a reading!
I'll ask her if he can come to the afters.
Sure he's relieved not to have to spend all day in a suit with my mates!

Milly33

Oh I cant help but feel ye are being a bit harsh on the ladies.. I do get it. but sometimes it is a case of they can only fit a certain amount of people in the venue. And then if someone cancels they are like yes we can ask this person now.. I really would not look too much into it or overthink it. Been to weddings were family were told no kids and their are kids all over the place while others arranged babysitters, been to one where I was invited last min to keep someone company, our own due to messy around with family cough cough we had to re-invite someone from the afters to the entire thing... There is so much arsing around with weddings tis impossible to keep all happy

Faith

Addle wrote: »

I'd never not go-I'm saying a reading!
I'll ask her if he can come to the afters.
Sure he's relieved not to have to spend all day in a suit with my mates!

I think you should talk to her. If you're close enough to do a reading, you're close enough to carefully discuss your hurt and disappointment about your OH not being invited. Approach it gently, IMO, like "X, you know, I was so looking forward to bringing A to your wedding. I've had to go to so many on my own over the years that I was really excited about having someone special in my life to bring to your wedding. I understand that you're very tight on numbers, but can I at least invite him to the afters? It would mean a lot to me."

It's absolutely no skin off her nose if he comes to the afters, and if you phrase things carefully and tactfully enough, she'd have to be incredibly insensitive not to pick up on how much she has hurt you by excluding him. DO NOT say nothing to avoid confrontation. You're being totally reasonable, IMO, and ignoring it will only cause you hurt and, possibly, resentment.

SarahMollie

Milly33 wrote: »

Oh I cant help but feel ye are being a bit harsh on the ladies.. I do get it. but sometimes it is a case of they can only fit a certain amount of people in the venue. And then if someone cancels they are like yes we can ask this person now.. I really would not look too much into it or overthink it. Been to weddings were family were told no kids and their are kids all over the place while others arranged babysitters, been to one where I was invited last min to keep someone company, our own due to messy around with family cough cough we had to re-invite someone from the afters to the entire thing... There is so much arsing around with weddings tis impossible to keep all happy

I know and I apprciate its a delicate balance, but I think that someitmes these situations can be avoided witha bit of forethought.

For example, if you're inviting 140ppl, maybe only 120 will RSVP yes, so some friends of mine have "over invited" knowing that the drop out rate will cover them, and its always worked out in the cases I know of, allowing for about a 10% decline.

Another tactic I've seen is to "tier" the guests, and send out one batch of invites early. That way, once you know who can't come from Tier1, you have extra space in Tier2. Obviously you have to employ a bit of common sense here, like groups of friends need to be in the same tier but it means you can offer full invites to as many as possible, without anyone being any the wiser.

I know you have to draw a line somewhere, but I personally wouldn't draw it through an established couple.

I know in my case, my BF was a bit peripheral himself and wouldn't have been offended if he didn't make the cut (they' know each other from growing up, but shes only in Ireland a few times a year now as has settled abroad.) It was him making it, but not me, that caused the problem.

Toots

Milly33 wrote: »

Oh I cant help but feel ye are being a bit harsh on the ladies.. I do get it. but sometimes it is a case of they can only fit a certain amount of people in the venue. And then if someone cancels they are like yes we can ask this person now.. I really would not look too much into it or overthink it. Been to weddings were family were told no kids and their are kids all over the place while others arranged babysitters, been to one where I was invited last min to keep someone company, our own due to messy around with family cough cough we had to re-invite someone from the afters to the entire thing... There is so much arsing around with weddings tis impossible to keep all happy

I think what's sh*tty in this situation is that she's the ONLY one who's OH isn't invited. I'd completely understand if numbers were tight and nobody was getting +1s but to single her out and say "ah sure you're used to it" is really inconsiderate.