Giving up seat for Pregnant women

lulu1

I would have no problem whatsoever giving up my seat to a pregnant woman an elderly person of a person with a disability it's only good manners, and thank God I am healthy enough to stand.

crusier

Always, how could you not?

Swan2012

Thanks for all the comments, some interesting ones to consider!
I dont intend to come across that i feel a sense of entitlement to a seat because if that was the case I would be asking for one every day. Its just it's very nice and kind when it does happen. I also do realise some people don't notice me due to iphones and books. The newer trains do have a picture of a pregnant lady on the window of priority seat to respond to one post but i don't want to be the one to enforce it, l'd rather the occupant give it up willingly. With regard to commuting options, suggestions given aren't an option as much as i'd like them to be.

On the upside, i only have 11 weeks to go so will continue with my human nature observations as just that. And will take the few kind gestures as 'pay it forward's'. Heres to hoping i dont go into labour on the train. 😉

One eyed Jack

sup_dude wrote: »

I'm all for giving up my seat. Most of the time I just stand anyway, even if there is seats. My point was that I don't think it's for other people to judge if someone else doesn't automatically get up.

I don't think anyone was judging anyone who doesn't automatically get up though, it was more the posters who were coming out with all manner of excuses as to why someone wouldn't automatically get up. I don't think the OP expected anyone to get up, she was just wondering do they?

People making excuses as to why a person wouldn't get up are being entirely disingenuous IMO and rallying against a point that was never made (this "sense of entitlement"), kinda funny the lack of self-awareness in rallying against perceptions of self-entitlement though if you think about it.

johnny osbourne

always stand on public transport wehr possible, at least be looking out at the progressive world instead of looking at depressed people going to

Mark Tapley

galljga1 wrote: »

I have given up my seat to both pregnant ladies and elderly persons. 40+ now but I have always done so. On one occasion, I got up and had to walk a bit down a carriage to get the attention of a pregnant lady to offer her my seat. When I turned back, my seat had been taken by a young twat who was not for moving. I whispered sweet nothings in his ear..... he moved.

40 Jesus ! I am 50 and well able to stand on my own two feet.

Yes I would give up my seat to someone I thought needed it.

Zippie84

lollpop wrote: »

Pregnancy isn't a disability but growing a human in your belly can be exhausting so a seat would always be appreciated!

This.

I don't see why it needs to get all about disability or not etc. It's more about just being nice to our fellow human beings.

King George VI

I would always offer my seat to a pregnant woman. Not because I think I should. But because if a pregnant lady stands on a bus, there's a chance the bus might jerk and she'll fall and injure herself or the baby. I've seen grown men injure themselves by this.

YFlyer

Mark Tapley wrote: »

40 Jesus ! I am 50 and well able to stand on my own two feet.

Yes I would give up my seat to someone I thought needed it.

Why attack somebody that would do the same as you?

Ave Sodalis

One eyed Jack wrote: »

I don't think anyone was judging anyone who doesn't automatically get up though, it was more the posters who were coming out with all manner of excuses as to why someone wouldn't automatically get up. I don't think the OP expected anyone to get up, she was just wondering do they?

People making excuses as to why a person wouldn't get up are being entirely disingenuous IMO and rallying against a point that was never made (this "sense of entitlement"), kinda funny the lack of self-awareness in rallying against perceptions of self-entitlement though if you think about it.

I think some of the posts could be taken as being judgemental. Things along the lines of "I get up because I have manners" and so on seem to imply that if you don't get up, then you don't have manners. I think (could be wrong) that that's what people are picking up on.

YFlyer

Johnny Carson wrote: »

I would always offer my seat to a pregnant woman. Not because I think I should. But because if a pregnant lady stands on a bus, there's a chance the bus might jerk and she'll fall and injure herself or the baby. I've seen grown men injure themselves by this.

Exactly especially the jerks of bus drivers jamming on the brakes at any time when stopping.

PandaPoo

Johnny Carson wrote: »

I would always offer my seat to a pregnant woman. Not because I think I should. But because if a pregnant lady stands on a bus, there's a chance the bus might jerk and she'll fall and injure herself or the baby. I've seen grown men injure themselves by this.

It could be the hormones but I find it really sweet and touching that you'd think like that

lulu1

Swan2012 wrote: »

Thanks for all the comments, some interesting ones to consider!
I dont intend to come across that i feel a sense of entitlement to a seat because if that was the case I would be asking for one every day. Its just it's very nice and kind when it does happen. I also do realise some people don't notice me due to iphones and books. The newer trains do have a picture of a pregnant lady on the window of priority seat to respond to one post but i don't want to be the one to enforce it, l'd rather the occupant give it up willingly. With regard to commuting options, suggestions given aren't an option as much as i'd like them to be.

On the upside, i only have 11 weeks to go so will continue with my human nature observations as just that. And will take the few kind gestures as 'pay it forward's'. Heres to hoping i dont go into labour on the train. 😉

Well if you go into labour on the train you are on your own because the book readers will raise the books a bit higher, the pretend sleepers wil start to snore and the phone users will go into such a panic that they will be talking and texting at the same time. OP if I was you I would just stay at home it' s safer:)

recylingbin

Depends...
Did I get her pregnant?

recylingbin

lulu1 wrote: »

Well if you go into labour on the train you are on your own because the book readers will raise the books a bit higher, the pretend sleepers wil start to snore and the phone users will go into such a panic that they will be talking and texting at the same time. OP if I was you I would just stay at home it' s safer:)

Placenta selfie time

irishgirl19

I'm pregnant op,although not as far as you. I can tell you I'd have no problem asking someone (who is not old) to move from the priority seats on Dublin bus which is reserved for elderly and pregnant people (the even have a picture of a pregnant woman on them)

johnny osbourne

recylingbin wrote: »

Depends...
Did I get her pregnant?

well it wasn't me

the_syco

Just ask can you sit down. Most people will just assume that you're fat.

Don't ask the fat woman to move from the special seat, as she's probably not fat :P

Mark Tapley

YFlyer wrote: »

Why attack somebody that would do the same as you?

What in the name of holy fùck are you jabbering about?

Stheno

irishgirl19 wrote: »

I'm pregnant op,although not as far as you. I can tell you I'd have no problem asking someone (who is not old) to move from the priority seats on Dublin bus which is reserved for elderly and pregnant people (the even have a picture of a pregnant woman on them)

Really? I always thought it was a pic of someone in a wheelchair the text says elderly or disabled

spottybananas

I'm 33 weeks pregnant and I'm so grateful I don't have to get public transport very often. I don't look very pregnant at all, but I get so dizzy and my pelvis and stomach ache If I stand too long. I had to sit in the bank recently because it was so very hot and I couldn't stand at the counter without swaying, the woman dealing with me (wasn't at cash counter it was a separate counter) just looked at me like I was being really weird. Even if she couldn't tell I was pregnant I felt it shouldn't matter why I needed to sit, it could've been blood pressure related, hunger, chronic pain, there was no need to make me feel bad for it!

While I would have no problem asking for a seat, because I look "fine" I feel many would think I was just asking to take advantage of the whole pregnant lady on public transport thing.

johnny osbourne

i'm pregnant also/too

jimgoose

Couldn't be bothered my bollix with any of it. Best I can do, if you see me on public transport and you think you have a legitimate case for my seat, I'll fight ya for it.

LynnGrace

Gongoozler wrote: »

Btw I actively watch out for people who might need a seat more than me, and wouldn't think twice about asking them to take it.

The point is nobody should feel entitled to a seat over someone else. It's nice when someone offers you their seat if you need it but there is no obligation to do so. They've paid (presumably), same as you have. The expectation annoys me.

+1.
I've given up my seat willingly many a time.
Equally, if someone offers me their seat, I thank them gratefully and accept it.

ceadaoin.

Stheno wrote: »

Really? I always thought it was a pic of someone in a wheelchair the text says elderly or disabled

It does have a pic of a pregnant woman and also someone carrying a child. I was on a dublin bus for the first time in a while recently and my daughter asked what the sign meant. I think it says for 'those less able to stand'

The Backwards Man

There should be more studies done on people and seats. They sit down, gawk, leer, gleen and stare at everybody, then as soon as someone more in need of a seat they are appears they suddenly become engrossed in carpets and 'In Case Of Emergency Break Glass' stickers

Kevin McCloud

Scrap public transport and everybody buy a tractor.

PucaMama

I've been rudely asked to move before by people who thought I didn't deserve a seat. If you ask nicely I'd have no problem, but sly loud remarks assuming I'm being lazy only result in you been shown up. I would of course offer my seat to older or less able people, it's only fair but some people need to realise that not all disabilities are immediately obvious

Smidge

Jesus, what happened to sheer manners?
Were yis raised by wolves?
If you see someone elderly, pregnant, carrying an infant/small child, with a disability, ffs give them your seat.

Here's someone who was raised right.......and she's not pregnant, its called being a gentleman
And they call him a douche??? :rolleyes:

Choodefat

OLD PROVERB

One should offer up one's seat
to a lady in labour...
Cos she first offered hers
to do some guy a favour...

snoopy84

offered my seat to a lady who I thought was pregnant once, she looked absolutely heartbroken. I thought I'm never making that mistake again. another time I ended up getting off the bus three stops early so i could offer my seat to a woman standing, I couldn't figure out if the woman was pregnant or overweight

syklops

Mark Tapley wrote: »

What in the name of holy fùck are you jabbering about?

He's commenting on your ignorant commenting style.

Can't imagine why.

Rosy Posy

Using public transport all around Dublin with my baby in a sling I found that people were constantly offering me seats, often quite insistently. The silly thing was that the baby would wake up if I sat down so I had to stand! I'd say that the fear of mistaking fat for pregnant puts a lot of people off.

galljga1

syklops wrote: »

He's commenting on your ignorant commenting style.

Can't imagine why.

Ah, leave poor Tapley alone. I find some of his entries funny including this one actually. This is After Hours.

Mark Tapley

syklops wrote: »

He's commenting on your ignorant commenting style.

Can't imagine why.

Hello syklops, do you know the five lamps?

eviltwin

When I was pregnant and needed a seat I asked for it. Never did anyone offer me one. Pregnancy isn't a disability but it can be physically debilitating. Back pain, spd, it can be tough on some women. I always give my seat to a pregnant woman or a parent trying to carry a small child. It's no hardship for me to stand and they always appreciate it.

Greenmachine

anncoates wrote: »

When these threads come up, I always have a secret wager to myself on when somebody will come up with the chestnut that public transport is teeming with thousands of young to middle-aged people with barely perceptible but profound disabilities that require a seat at all times.

You know for a fact that, that is not what I said. Please stop trying to be difficult.

Day Lewin

I well remember the back pain. When I was pregnant - some 20 years ago and more - people did offer me a seat quite often. But if they didn't - (and how would they know about my back pain?) - I would just smile at them and even ASK - "Would you mind? I've got such a back-ache..." etc and they always leapt to offer me.

Interestingly, it is quite often women who offer for you to sit down - they probably remember LOL.

IvyTheTerrible

I had a nice relatively pain free pregnancy so I rarely needed to sit down on public transport. I had a very small bump, and what with winter coats etc a lot of people wouldn't have even realised I was pregnant, so I never expected anyone to offer me a seat. On the rare occassions I had a sore back, I asked someone for a seat, and they always let me sit down no problem.

pauliebdub

It depends entirely on my mood, if I'm in a good generous mood I'd happily give up my seat, if I'm in a bad mood I'd just as easily say no.

It also depends on who is asking and how I am asked: some horrible entitled scobette would get a no, a pleasant polite woman is likely to get a yes.

There's also the possibility of a pregnant / fat mix up which leaves me hesitant to offer.

darkdubh

Swan2012 wrote: »

I wanted to see if and how opinions have changed out there on the topic of giving up a seat to a Pregnant woman. I am 6 months pregnant, very obviously so as have no weight anywhere else and my bump is largely protruding! It's my 2nd child and 6 years since last pregnancy. Last time around i only occasionally struggled to get a seat on the train but this time i have only been offered a seat twice, both times by gentlemen over 40, i told both of them how kind they are, mainly so others nearby would hear and maybe share the same type manners in future. Up until a few weeks ago it didnt bother me as much having to stand but now i am getting severe back pain after 10 minutes which then takes several hours to subside. The stop i get on is 25minutes from the city centre and there is only ever standing room so I always go down the aisle for many reasons. These include, i cant be squashed at doors , hope someone will offer a seat and if someone gets off before city centre i might at least get to sit for 5 minutes. However, i have noticed some interesting things, people will see me getting on as i make eye contact while on platform but will pretend to be asleep when i appear beside them and the iphone has emerged so hardly anyone looks up. My colleagues in work ask me each morning how i got on, most are young and cant believe how little i'v been offered a sear. Some have suggested i ask people to get up but i feel its a step too far. My opinion so far is that life has just changed and people dont want to know any more, its becoming a less caring city. However, deep down i hope i'm wrong and its just my bad luck so far. What do people out there think who are commuters?

At no point do you tell us in which city this has happened?Beijing,London,Paris?Is it a city in Ireland or abroad?

Arne_Saknussem

darkdubh wrote: »

At no point do you tell us in which city this has happened?Beijing,London,Paris?Is it a city in Ireland or abroad?

With an absolute shot in the dark i'm guessing she's in Dublin.

FTA69

Hilarious the amount of people doing intellectual contortions to justify not giving up a seat for a pregnant woman. The chances of a carriage or bus full of able bodied people all having these concealed ailments that rival that of pregnancy is pretty f*cking slim. I rarely see any sense of "entitlement" in he pregnant women I see left standing on the Tube, rather just someone who could do with a hand being ignored by a shower of mannerless c*nts.

Nobody is asking anyone to make a major sacrifice like, it's simply basic common decency and manners but as usual some people feel the need to revel in individualistic arrogance and argument for the sake of it.

Call me Al

I've got an even better one for you.
When I was 6 months pregnant with my first child and I had to travel from Leixlip to Connolly every weekday morning. The train and platform was always packed.
I fainted on the platform this particular morning just as I came towards the door of the train, couldn't move in a heap on the ground. People just sat on their seats or stood in the carriage and looked at me and finally after about 10 seconds of just lying there in a state, unable to move on the ground, 3 student nurses got off the train to help me.

I will never ever forget that morning as long as I live.

Celticfire

I remember one morning commuting on the train to work when this young one got on with an infant in her arms. The train was jammers and she had to balance herself up against one of the vertical poles and hold on with one arm.

Que moi offering up my seat to make her journey a bit easier. She declined the offer of the seat and said she was fine but me being the courteous chap I am insisted a couple more times that she take my seat until she relented and we swapped places.

So I am now standing and glance down to have a look at this swaddling baby that I gave up my seat for. Lo and behold it's one of those training dolls that are used to show what's it's like to have a real baby.... First time I ever gave up my seat for a toy.

I'd always offer my seat, not because standing while being pregnant causes pain, because that depends on the person, but because on public transport you are more at risk from falling, and particularly so when your centre of gravity is altered. I wouldn't like to a pregnant lady hurt themselves and potentially their baby from falling when they could be sitting in my seat.

AlanG

I always offer my seat but during winter it can be very difficult to tell if someone is actually pregnant. You should ask for a seat or take off your coat so people can be sure. I still see lots of men giving up their seats but women in general seem much slower to give theirs up.

Stheno

I think I'm thinking of the seats towards the back of the bus not the ones for wheelchair users when I'm thinking of the message about elderly/disabled people

somesoldiers

AlanG wrote: »

I always offer my seat but during winter it can be very difficult to tell if someone is actually pregnant. You should ask for a seat or take off your coat so people can be sure. I still see lots of men giving up their seats but women in general seem much slower to give theirs up.

or wave your scan about?

Omackeral

Call me Al wrote: »

I've got an even better one for you.
When I was 6 months pregnant with my first child and I had to travel from Leixlip to Connolly every weekday morning. The train and platform was always packed.
I fainted on the platform this particular morning just as I came towards the door of the train, couldn't move in a heap on the ground. People just sat on their seats or stood in the carriage and looked at me and finally after about 10 seconds of just lying there in a state, unable to move on the ground, 3 student nurses got off the train to help me.

I will never ever forget that morning as long as I live.

If that happened in 2015, many people would have the camera phones out in an instant or their goddamn selfie sticks rather than raise the alarm or attempt to help. Horrendous behaviour