The biggest lies in movies...

BattleCorp

maudgonner wrote: »

"Just put it on my card!". Hands over the credit card with a flourish. Never, ever gives them the PIN though...

It's only recently that the US have started to use chip and pin technology.

Edit: Damn. Beaten to the punch by 30 seconds.

maudgonner

I didn't realise all movies are made in America...

AndyBoBandy

my number's; 555-123-456

BattleCorp

maudgonner wrote: »

I didn't realise all movies are made in America...

Common mistake.

jackwigan

finglashoop wrote: »

At full galllop. A marathon runner isnt sprinting

Name one movie where it shows a horse at full gallop for hours?

mloc123

ScumLord wrote: »

Even poor people live in large apartment in new york. In reality not even rich people live in large apartments in new york.

The famous catchall for these is "rent controlled building"

duffer247

when a landline phone doesn't work you hit the receiver a number of times expecting it to work, which it never does

Cervantes2

Oh, sure. Like lawyers work in big skyscrapers and have secretaries. Look at him, he's wearing a belt. That's Hollywood for you.

ScumLord

According to hollywood writers the computer mouse was never invented.

GLaDOS

darkpagandeath

Women left alone in a Room for more than 2 minutes will turn lesbian. Well in the Films I Research. :P

eeguy

Despite the huge amount of spontaneous, unprotected sex that happens in movies, there's rarely a pregnancy or STI, unless the plot requires one.

I can't image Pussy Galore wrapped around the toilet with morning sickness the day of Operation Grand Slam, or Christian Grey paying child support and changing sh*tty nappies.

pilly

darkpagandeath wrote: »

Women left alone in a Room for more than 2 minutes will turn lesbian. Well in the Films I Research. :P

Plumber/Carpenter/Electrician is always gorgeous in them movies too.

jmayo

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

That characters can have a normal discussion in the middle of a nightclub setting with a full party and blaring music happening around them.

I said that ages ago you mustn't have heard me because of all the background noise.

Actually I can't remember any scene from a James Bond film where he was getting a STD check

How come in the old Westerns the cowboys/cavalry were such good shots they could always shoot the indians, but the horses were ok to get up and run off.


Actually watching Chisum (John Wayne movie for anyone interested - don't read on if you actually want to watch the movie) I noticed the cattle stampede scene towards end.
I just wondered if anyone would dare do that scene now and take on the animals rights lobby groups.

Boom_Bap

pilly wrote: »

Plumber/Carpenter/Electrician is always gorgeous in them movies too.

Plumber you say?

eeguy

jmayo wrote: »

Actually I can't remember any scene from a James Bond film where he was getting a STD check

It was probably part of his employee health insurance. I'd say it was a comprehensive policy

pilly

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Plumber you say?

I'm afraid to click that, I'm in work.

ohnonotgmail

eeguy wrote: »

It was probably part of his employee health insurance. I'd say it was a comprehensive policy

it would have to be very comprehensive. i'd say he was riddled.

finglashoop

jackwigan wrote: »

Name one movie where it shows a horse at full gallop for hours?

Couldnt tell you. I was answering someone who said they did

Hammer89

Gwynplaine wrote: »

When the bad dude is running after the ditsy girl, she jumps into the car, and guess what, it won't start.

That happens to women a fair bit in cars because they put their house key in the ignition. Again, I'll take the ban.

Capt'n Midnight

Movies vs. common sense.

Things I'll do if I ever become an Evil Overlord.

1 My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones.

2 My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.

3 My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.

4 Shooting is not too good for my enemies.

5 The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

6 I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them.

7 When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."

8 After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.

9 I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled "Danger: Do Not Push". The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such.

10 I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum — a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.

11 I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.

12 One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.

13 All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.

14 The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.

15 I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 1:17 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.

16 I will never utter the sentence "But before I kill you, there's just one thing I want to know."

17 When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.

18 I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.

19 I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance and she'd betray her own father.

20 Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.

21 I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.

22 No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.

23 I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way — even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless — my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.

24 I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, This Cannot Be!! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)

25 No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.

26 No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber.

27 I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.

28 My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.

29 I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.

30 All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.

31 All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.

32 I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.

33 I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.

34 I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.

35 I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.

36 I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.

37 If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.

38 If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.

39 If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.

40 I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.

41 Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.

42 When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.

43 I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.

44 I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.

45 I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say "And here is the price for failure," then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.

46 If an advisor says to me "My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?", I will reply "This," and kill the advisor.

47 If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.

48 I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.

49 If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.

50 My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.

51 If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position.

52 I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.

53 If the beautiful princess that I capture says "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.

54 I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.

55 The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.

56 My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.

57 Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner's manual.

58 If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.

59 I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.

60 My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords.

61 If my advisors ask "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?", I will not proceed unless I have a response that satisfies them.

62 I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.

63 Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.

64 I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.

65 If I must have computer systems with publicly available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.

66 My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.

67 No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.

68 I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save my life again.

69 All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.

70 When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.

71 If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.

72 If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.

73 I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.

74 When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.

75 I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.

76 If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)

77 If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.

78 I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!" The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical."

79 If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.

80 If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.

81 If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.

82 I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.

83 If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.

84 I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.

85 I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. "Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse." Instead it will be more along the lines of "Push the button."

86 I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.

87 My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.

88 If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.

89 After I capture the hero's superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.

90 I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.

91 I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.

92 If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say that his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)

93 If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.

94 When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.

95 My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look.

96 My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.

97 My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled.

98 If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others' lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.

99 Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45MB in size.

100 Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

Beanntraigheach

super_furry wrote: »

All ugly girls are secretly stunners who just wear bad clothes, glasses and need a haircut.

Once the glasses are removed they no longer require them.

Wibbs

Bullets are stopped by tables, sofas, car doors/boots, damn near anything that's not glass. Unless you're sheltering behind the block and the baddies are firing .22 rimfires your average bullet will go through both doors and into you. Hell, I once fired an arrow from a longbow that went through a car door. It stopped at the fletching, but if you had been sitting in the car seat you'd have sprouted an unwanted extra ventilation hole.

This one has gotten better with the years, but a harness of full plate armour was not particularly restrictive and since the lads who wore them wore them a lot, they were well used to them. The chances of a foot soldier going up against such a man so outfitted and surviving would be slim. Oh and jabbing a dagger into any chink wouldn't work. They wore mail under the plate and their fighting style was designed to keep any openings to a minimum.

Speaking of armour, Braveheart would have worn a harness, not a kilt. They hadn't been invented yet. The Spartans a la 300 would have also worn armour, rather than glistening around like the Chippendales. They weren't daft and as lifetime soldiers they knew the score. Speaking of 300; the best lines come from the original tale and there were more like 4000 overall Greek forces.

Beanntraigheach

The streets of large American cities are deserted after dark.

A gunshot to the shoulder is a minor injury.

Musclebound heroes can go around striped to the waist all day without fear of sunburn.

Splitting up a group to explore a potentially hazardous location is a good idea.

Idiosyncratic outfit = formidable opponent.
Nondescript uniform = easily dispatched drone.

Too Tough To Die

Plain clothes cops looking to apprehend a suspect, spot him 30 yards away and yell at the otherwise oblivious criminal. Chase ensues.

Duckjob

- In high school movies, the object of the nerdy heros affection, is always going out with the biggest asshole in the school. They continue the relationship despite their asshole boyfriend openly treating them like sh*t.

- Even the ****tiest old junker of a car will accelerate like a Ferrari when the hero mashes the accelerator into the floor.

- In chase scenes the cars involved are always exactly matched performance wise

And my favorite...

- Highly traumatic events such as killings of the hero's friends or family, or even mass deaths such in terrorist attacks affect our hero momentarily, but by the end of the movie they've forgotten and are happily wisecracking.

Capt'n Midnight

AndyBoBandy wrote: »

my number's; 555-123-456

In Ireland 020 91X XXXX is reserved for filming

Wibbs

Duckjob wrote: »

- In high school movies, the object of the nerdy heros affection, is always going out with the biggest asshole in the school. They continue the relationship despite their asshole boyfriend openly treating them like sh*t.

and they end up with the nerdy hero, which would be unlikely. One flic that turned that around was 80's classic "Pretty In Pink". It had originally been shot that the nerd got the girl, but test screenings showed the audience didn't buy it, so they changed it at the last minute. She ended up with the slightly less arsehole guy and the nerd magically became popular with other pretty ladies in one last scene(when he had been as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit up to that point).

- Even the ****tiest old junker of a car will accelerate like a Ferrari when the hero mashes the accelerator into the floor.

or when the hero changes gear. And they change gear a lot. I suppose to American audiences generally not understanding how "driving stick" works it may seem logical.

Nanoc

When Peter Parker used Bing to look up something in Spiderman....

osarusan

Skyfall - Head of MI6, escaping from crazed ex-agent at night, allows herself to be guided by torchlight across dark ground.

oneilla

Re: the hearing people in clubs. Scenes with background sound and extras are filmed in silence but for the principle actors and the music and, folly and music is added in later. Some TV shows and films make an effort to have the actors raising their voices/straining to hear one another but there's a limit to it since dialogue has become a very important part of the medium so it has to be clear. It's often daft and unreal but the answer is for clubs and bars to turn the music down rather than films and TV shows to sacrifice the audibility of dialogue

PukkaStukka

Don you just love a good thriller set on a plane?

For a start, the climactic plane crash usually takes about 10 minutes of high drama from the moment of impact till the wreckage finally comes to a halt. ConAir is a case in point.

Or a gun shot fired in the cockpit usually results in the aircraft entering a massive life threatening dive that is recovered within inches of the ground. And the person who gets shot is usually the one who spoke lovingly earlier about his family and even produces a photo of them to stoke the heartache about to unfold.

Or when there's a thunderstorm, the plane always flys smack bang through the middle of it rather than around it. It'll get struck by lightning which usually sets an engine in fire.

twill

PukkaStukka wrote: »

Don you just love a good thriller set on a plane?

For a start, the climactic plane crash usually takes about 10 minutes of high drama from the moment of impact till the wreckage finally comes to a halt. ConAir is a case in point.

Or a gun shot fired in the cockpit usually results in the aircraft entering a massive life threatening dive that is recovered within inches of the ground. And the person who gets shot is usually the one who spoke lovingly earlier about his family and even produces a photo of them to stoke the heartache about to unfold.

Or when there's a thunderstorm, the plane always flys smack bang through the middle of it rather than around it. It'll get struck by lightning which usually sets an engine in fire.

That reminds me of a film that was on TV just after Christmas in which the hero (possibly Jason Statham) and his nemesis fought in the cabin while the plane was in a near vertical dive. The plane then hit the water at full speed but miraculously stayed intact as did everyone on it.

If that happened in reality, the plane and everyone in it would be - let us say, not in one piece.

Shannon757

twill wrote: »

That reminds me of a film that was on TV just after Christmas in which the hero (possibly Jason Statham) and his nemesis fought in the cabin while the plane was in a near vertical dive. The plane then hit the water at full speed but miraculously stayed intact as did everyone on it.

If that happened in reality, the plane and everyone in it would be - let us say, not in one piece.

Transporter 2 I think.

CaptainR

I don't know a lot about planes and how the work but why in movies when they're in a nose dive and the hero is desperately trying to pull the joystick back up to level it, is it so hard?

Is there not power steering? Its as if he is pulling the whole steering system manually by sheer streghth.

Also it sometimes won't work until someone else also pulls it and then it'll suddenly work and they'll skim the water and happily fly away.

Billy86

To anyone thinking of forming a crime gang, this should come in handy.

Also, next time you're on the phone to someone trying copying a movie phone call. Start off with something snappy like "talk to me" and as soon as you're finished making a point just hang the phone straight up, no warning or goodbyes or nothing.

Shannon757

CaptainR wrote: »

I don't know a lot about planes and how the work but why in movies when they're in a nose dive and the hero is desperately trying to pull the joystick back up to level it, is it so hard?

Is there not power steering? Its as if he is pulling the whole steering system manually by sheer streghth.

Also it sometimes won't work until someone else also pulls it and then it'll suddenly work and they'll skim the water and happily fly away.

Depends. Old planes would have mechanical controls with physical wires to move things and would require a lot of strength. Modern planes are fly by wire so if you move the joystick or yoke it sends a signal by computer so wouldn'tbe too hard to move.

davedanon

twill wrote: »

That reminds me of a film that was on TV just after Christmas in which the hero (possibly Jason Statham) and his nemesis fought in the cabin while the plane was in a near vertical dive. The plane then hit the water at full speed but miraculously stayed intact as did everyone on it.

Ah, let's be fair. films featuring THE STATH take suspension of disbelief to record altitudes.

Thoie

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

99 Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45MB in size.

Showing its age there! Wonder if anyone under the age of 20 would get the relevance?

CramCycle

davedanon wrote: »

Never in my entire life, despite having had as many horrible nightmares as the next man or woman, have I found myself sitting bolt upright at 3am, pouring sweat and pawing at the sheets, utterly convinced that I had just shot someone/been shot, fallen off a building/been hit by a car, or eaten by something either prehistoric or not of this world.

Happened to me loads of time. Some people get it, some don't. Never has any relevance to real life though.

pilly wrote: »

People sleep all night with their arms around each other!

And not get dead arms FFS

Thoie wrote: »

Americans are only starting to use chip and pin, and it's not terribly unusual not to sign for things either. They worry that PINs will enable fraud...

Amex were the last time I was in the states (2 years ago) apparently still not using chip and pin. I went into a shop and the machine asked me to insert the card. The lady at the register looked really confused and called over someone else, who informed her it was a European thing, and it would be fine. Thought it weird it was card specific rather than machine.

davedanon wrote: »

Ah, let's be fair. films featuring THE STATH take suspension of disbelief to record altitudes.

There was one where he had his heart removed which may have been a sequel to one where he kept having to shoot adrenaline to stay alive. Terrible movie but oddly you could not look away.

Showing its age there! Wonder if anyone under the age of 20 would get the relevance?

Imagine telling someone young that 1mb of data could take a few minutes or longer to transfer.

ohnonotgmail

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

...
99 Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45MB in size.

...

1.44MB surely?

323

Flicked through the movie "Deepwater Horizon", last night.amount of inaccuracies is unbelievable, good special effects all the same. As isual in the movies, they didn't need hearing protection in chopper out (an S92, the big beasties), and chatting as if in an office or home.

Talking to each other in a helicopter has got to be one of the most consistent lies in the movies/TV, lip reading, aye, but talking just ain't possible.

Thoie

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

1.44MB surely?

The idea of padding something to 1.45MB was so that it wouldn't fit in 1.44MB.

silverharp

every film where the main characters just park at the front door of every type of building in big cities where it would be impossible in real life and never clamped when they come out unless its Die Hard 2 and you are supposed to believe the local cops are the bad guys ;-)

CramCycle

silverharp wrote: »

every film where the main characters just park at the front door of every type of building in big cities where it would be impossible in real life and never clamped when they come out unless its Die Hard 2 and you are supposed to believe the local cops are the bad guys ;-)

TBF they are in an airport and that would be reasonable.

Beanntraigheach

Here's another one:
Women will ditch the rich asshole for the 'nice guy'.

finglashoop

In hand to hand combat women are somehow able to withstand damage easily from bigger stronger men while simultaneously dealing out damage to injure said bigger man

jmayo

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Movies vs. common sense.

Things I'll do if I ever become an Evil Overlord.

Ehh your forgot
101 I will not make big long fecking lists that take all day to go through.

Wibbs wrote: »

Bullets are stopped by tables, sofas, car doors/boots, damn near anything that's not glass. Unless you're sheltering behind the block and the baddies are firing .22 rimfires your average bullet will go through both doors and into you. Hell, I once fired an arrow from a longbow that went through a car door. It stopped at the fletching, but if you had been sitting in the car seat you'd have sprouted an unwanted extra ventilation hole.

This one has gotten better with the years, but a harness of full plate armour was not particularly restrictive and since the lads who wore them wore them a lot, they were well used to them. The chances of a foot soldier going up against such a man so outfitted and surviving would be slim. Oh and jabbing a dagger into any chink wouldn't work. They wore mail under the plate and their fighting style was designed to keep any openings to a minimum.

Sometimes I get a little worried about some of the stuff you know.

Shannon757 wrote: »

Transporter 2 I think.

Ahh the best bit was the car chase where he ju8mped the Audi A8 between the buildings and the suspension still worked never mind the fact he didn't slam into the side of the building.

I have to say I do enjoy his films but you have to suspend belief.

CaptainR wrote: »

I don't know a lot about planes and how the work but why in movies when they're in a nose dive and the hero is desperately trying to pull the joystick back up to level it, is it so hard?

Is there not power steering? Its as if he is pulling the whole steering system manually by sheer streghth.

Also it sometimes won't work until someone else also pulls it and then it'll suddenly work and they'll skim the water and happily fly away.

There would be a good chance the plane would go into spin or spiral dive and the recovery is different.
Either way you would need to use rudder pedals and actual throttle and especially level the stick/yoke rather than just pull back on it.

Actually the whole aeroplane misconceptions lead on to things like radio terminology in movies.

You never say "over and out"

They are actually said separately and mean different things.

Thoie wrote: »

Showing its age there! Wonder if anyone under the age of 20 would get the relevance?

This would be the best way of transferring data.
The youngsters wouldn't have a fe*king idea how to deal with it.

AndyBoBandy

Passenger boards a 747, a view of the plane mid cruise tells us it's an MD11, then it lands as a 737

twill

davedanon wrote: »

Ah, let's be fair. films featuring THE STATH take suspension of disbelief to record altitudes.

Ah come on, next you'll be telling me that gravity doesn't really work like Bollywood says it does.