Dog and new baby

hollytrees

I'm due my first baby at the beginning of July, my colleague is also due around the same time. She told me this morning she moved her 6 year old golden retriever out to the shed last night and he's no longer allowed into the house in preparation for the baby's arrival. At first I thought she was joking and said 'you can't do that to the poor dog'. She wasn't joking and wondered if I'd be doing the same with my little dog, I told her I havent a notion that I'd prefer to rehome the dog than do that to her.

So she asked me how I intend to manage having dog in the house with baby and I told her..
What I plan to do is have stairgate at living room door to make sure dog is never left alone with baby. I'm trying to get her used to lying in her bed by the fire rather than on my knee all the time. Also, now that the weather has improved I out her into the garden for while during the day where she has a kennel. My dog has never been aggressive so I'm not worried about her.

My colleague made me feel like I'd be so irresponsible having dog in the house. I'd welcome advice from dog owners with children. Am I deluded to think we can all live under the one roof as I couldn't imagine moving the dog outside?

Hooked

This is reminiscent of the recent thread about people 'giving up dogs' due to moving/circumstances, etc...

And the same advice goes here - as in that thread. If you WANT to make this work, you can... and quite easily.

I don't have kids. I've 2 large huskies that live in a very modest sized house with a small garden.

Let's pretend that I'm you.., or at the very least, your partner (last time I checked, the woman had the child, not the man).

I'd prepare well in advance. Buy the necessary tools (stair gate, etc). We have crate trained our 2. And IF we were to have a child, the crate would be great for those first few months. In your case - the gate would suffice. Or you could invest in a pen or crate and start training now.

The idea being to have the option to separate baby and doggy, while everyone settled in, got used to one another and you could safely do 'baby stuff' while the doggy was confined. In the short term.

If your dog is allowed up on furniture or up the stairs (ours are not) then begin the process of training that out of them - as you'll need the couch for feeding, changing, etc. Last thing you need is an unwelcome visitor jump up on ye two. A simple cuddle seeking pooch could hurt a newborn.

Don't just 'expect' them to hit it off. If you have to have them both in the same room, make this new baby (and sharing spaces with it) a positive experience. Invest in a new toy, a stuffed Kong or some special treats - so the dog associates being with the baby - as a positive thing.

Don't do what my SIL is doing.., and let two toddlers share a space with a dog and it's food... UNSUPERVISED!!! Asking for trouble. NEVER leave a dog and baby/toddler/child alone. NEVER. As good as our two are - a baby or toddler could make a wrong move and the dog might be forced to defend itself.

I'd imagine that the same approach will work as with anything new. Little by little and build up the time spent together.

And fair play for preempting the arrival. Like anything in life - a little bit of a proactive approach will benefit everyone involved.

And in my personal opinion... Nothing builds a child's immunity like having a dog around the house!!!

Tranceypoo

You sound perfectly reasonable and realistic, your work colleague sounds like one of those people who immediately presume the dog is going to eat your new baby or make it ill or something, completely unreasonable and over reacting! The poor dog living inside for 6 years then being chucked out in the shed and will probably be ignored from now on "I'm too busy with the baby"! Honestly I'm going to have to give up the Internet for a while the last few days of posts on here and FB have really pissed me off!!

Good advice from Hooked by the way!

eviltwin

My youngest was born when we had two dogs, a very temperamental terrier and Doberman. We took sensible precautions making sure the dogs were never alone with him and teaching him the appropriate way to treat them. We have never had any problems and my son is now 5. The terrier is still moody and has no time for him but the Doberman is his best friend. Our dogs routine never changed, we didn't want to do that in case it antagonised them. Once you take the obvious precautions I don't think you have anything to worry about. Congratulations.

hollytrees

Thanks for all the replies, i know I will make this work. I love my dog too much to just turf her out, can't stop thinking of that poor golden retriever 😞

fiounnalbe

I had 4 dogs when I had my daughter, she is 2 years old and we have 5 dogs now!

All my dogs lived inside and still do. The hardest part was when she started crawling and then walking, but we all managed to live together just fine. Precautions are still taken so that she is never left alone with any of the dogs and we teach her to not to grab out at them as they are passing etc.

Hookeds advice is perfect.

Congratulations and best of luck, it's all go and hustle and bustle but completely worth it

borderlinemeath

I'm having my first baby in August and we've 3 dogs at the moment. Plus the dogs I mind.

There's absolutely no chance they will be put outside, they're part of the family. Putting them outside and excluding them will lead to behavioural problems which is exactly what dog owners integrating a new arrival try to avoid. Of course there will be minor changes to their routine, some of which are in place already (they're well used to stairgates!) and all baby furniture and equipment will be in situ well before the baby arrives so it's not going to overwhelm them. Practice walks with an empty buggy, carrying a doll in your arms, acclimatising them to the noise of crying can all be done prior to baby arriving.

There's lots of information on APDT.ie on how to integrate dogs and babies, and behaviourists are available for specific sesions and to give advice and plans on any worries that a parent to be might have.

http://apdt.ie/index.php/articles/new-baby/

And always remember that babies and children really benefit from living with pets, a healthy immune system needs natural bacteria to build up and ward off allergies and illnesses. A home that is sterile beyond the norm can be detrimental to this, and plenty of research has been done on it, particularly on childhood asthma. So read up on it and tell her that in fact her over reaction could have potentially harmful effects on her childs health.

FurBabyMomma

She would be better to give up the dog. I absolutely despise this attitude. A dog is not a substitute until you have a 'real' baby that you can just cast aside.

I currently am on maternity leave with my 6 month old, a Rottweiler and two smallies and the 5 of us spend most of the day together in the living room. I have the utmost trust in my dogs but guess what? I still PREPARED them.

Before the baby was born I put up the baby gate, I walked around with a doll in my arms, I walked the dogs with the empty buggy, I got Tell Your Dog Your Pregnant and played the baby sounds cd, etc.

Every day we work together. Dogs have learned to just ignore the baby for the most part and cone hail, rain or shine tgey they get their walks - baby is either in buggy or carrier. I constantly get stopped and asked how I manage. I tell them it's simple, the dogs were there before the baby so I was always going to make it work.

Dogs are family. Forever. Not just until. I hope your friend sees this post and realises that all she needs to do is put the effort in on her part. She's the one that made all the choices and holds all the cards. I hope she plays them right.

FurBabyMomma

Lmao borderlinemeath, I can see we come from the exact same school of thought

Hooked

FurBabyMomma wrote: »

She would be better to give up the dog. I absolutely despise this attitude. A dog is not a substitute until you have a 'real' baby that you can just cast aside.

I currently am on maternity leave with my 6 month old, a Rottweiler and two smallies and the 5 of us spend most of the day together in the living room. I have the utmost trust in my dogs but guess what? I still PREPARED them.

Before the baby was born I put up the baby gate, I walked around with a doll in my arms, I walked the dogs with the empty buggy, I got Tell Your Dog Your Pregnant and played the baby sounds cd, etc.

Every day we work together. Dogs have learned to just ignore the baby for the most part and cone hail, rain or shine tgey they get their walks - baby is either in buggy or carrier. I constantly get stopped and asked how I manage. I tell them it's simple, the dogs were there before the baby so I was always going to make it work.

Dogs are family. Forever. Not just until. I hope your friend sees this post and realises that all she needs to do is put the effort in on her part. She's the one that made all the choices and holds all the cards. I hope she plays them right.

Best. Post. Ever.

borderlinemeath

FurBabyMomma wrote: »

Lmao borderlinemeath, I can see we come from the exact same school of thought

Out of my 3 dogs, the eldest LOVES children. Prefers them to adults! When people arrive she makes a bee line for the kids wagging and hugging into them, unlike most dogs she adores getting hugged by kids - she's absolutely bombproof with them. She's also very gentle with kids, almost as if she senses their frailty. Somebody who works with special needs children suggested that she would make a great therapy dog after watching her with her SN sister. I think the worst thing she might do is give the baby too much attention!

My second has barking issues with children which eventually subside when he knows them. He barks and dances about wagging his tail, and all the kids want to do is pet him but he evades all contact unless they have a treat, then he gets his treat and takes himself off to his bed or the doorstep. I think what tends to wierd him out is how kids move, and just break into a run for no reason, this really sets him off barking. I'll have to do the most work with him, as much as we've done since we rescued him, asking people can I borrow there children so I can desensitise him to their presence has been a step too far! Any work we've done is with family, of which he's used to.

My third dog that I recently rehomed came from a house with young children since they were toddlers. So I don't foresee too many problems. He is a bit of a licker though, you can't have your hands in his vicinity without getting a lick! This is one thing we're trying to work on, but he still gets in for a sneaky lick, the prolonged licking has subsided.

They're all Irish setters, and once they've got their run for the day then they're happy to sleep for the rest of it, so i'll be wearing a sling for the first while and bringing them into the adjacent fields.

hemijonson

Completely agree with everyone has said so far. Also before you arrive home maybe bring a vest or something with the babies smell in to the house for your dog to smell. Dogs rely heavily on their sense of smell and this will get them used to your babys scent. I don't have any children but my dog is my baby and it drives me insane that people react the way your friend did. I have a golden retriever and he is the most loveable thing in the world. Yes they are big but incredibly easy to train and if she put in a bit of effort her baby would have an immediate best friend. Instead her dog will always associate this massive change in his routine with the baby.
Best of luck with everything and well done on not giving up on your fur baby just because you're having a human baby

hollytrees

Thank,you for all the reassuring posts. My dog is very much part of the family, I call her my furry baby! So I will be noting all your advice and getting her more used to sharing my attention in the months to come.

boardbrowser

If you are looking for a step to step guide for preparing your dog for the arrival of a new baby, you would be hard pressed to find a book with such sound advice as this ' Happy kids, Happy dogs' by Barabara Schumannfang.

VonVix

If you have a baby first and then get a dog can you get the child used to living outside? :P 'Cause we all know how dangerous those little ones can be, with their sticky fingers and grabby hands, especially around our precious pooches.

I joke. Kinda!

ShaShaBear

When Abigail was born, Shadow was never put outside. When Shadow passed away and we fostered Lindy, she was never put outside. When we adopted Opie, we never put him outside. I hate people that think a dog can just forget four years of comfortable habit and that they will just adapt to borderline neglect with no emotional impact whatsoever.

We're expecting our second baby. Guess where Opie will be going. Nowhere

iguana

I have a two year old and a pair of dogs I've had for 8 and nearly 9 years. My main advice would be that if your dogs are into teddy bears do not dress your newborn in a fluffy bear/tigger/animal suit around the dogs until the dogs are 100% sure that the baby is not a toy. For the first few minutes when we brought my son home the dogs were convinced he was a new toy for them and got a bit frustrated that we weren't giving him to them. (It would definitely have been worse if he was dressed in a fluffy suit.) As I was supposed to be on bedrest we brought my son up stairs and left the dogs down with my parents and over the next few days we introduced them to each other bit by bit. And we introduced the dogs one at a time to him, as two dogs together multiplies their excitement. Within a few days one dog had almost completely lost interest in him and the other was absolutely desperate to "mother" him and was always trying to give him sneaky grooming licks and would push me to pick him up instantly if he thought the baby was upset.

As my son got older the main problem became food as my son loves to feed them. He will give them every scrap of his dinner if I'm not careful and the dogs stay very alert when he is eating waiting for him to give it to them. This means I have to keep them seperate if my son is eating. They are super gentle about taking food from him so I'm not worried they will hurt him, it's just that I want him to eat his meals and if he doesn't I want to know about it, not assume he is eating loads because the dogs have gobbled it. The other issue is teaching him to be gentle with our dogs as they tolerate him so well they will barely complain if he hurts them. And lastly to make sure he understands that all dogs are different so he must never go up to strange dogs by himself and must instead respect the dog and only approach them with the owners permission and in a way that the owner allows. At two he doesn't get this yet but it's never too early to be in the habit of telling him this and acting it out with him around other dogs.

hollytrees

Iguana, that's an interesting point about teddy bears, my dog has two, she brings one to bed and plays with the other during the day . They are both brown so maybe if I try to keep to different type ones for baby. We live in a bungalow so I am going to introduce stair gates soon. At the moment she follows me from room to room so I might practice at getting her used to staying in separate rooms at certain times

That poor golden retriever. That makes me so mad

hollytrees

That's how I feel, but her owner turned it around trying to make me feel bad for having my dog in house with a newborn

ShaShaBear

hollytrees wrote: »

That's how I feel, but her owner turned it around trying to make me feel bad for having my dog in house with a newborn

Well don't you feel one bit bad. Because not only are you boosting the baby's immune system, but from a very early age you are teaching them that dogs are not a disposable play-toy but rather a valued member of the family household. They learn how to treat them, comfort them and how to give them space. It's the best lesson a child can learn, one that guarantees safety from other dogs in the future (learning to read signs, knowing not to pet them while they sleep/eat etc).

The poor golden retriever will know nothing but confusion, pain and upset. Probably jealousy and is way more likely to cause trouble than your dog, who's life will not have changed at all!

alroley

I don't have any children, but do want them in the future. There is no way in hell my dog would get put outside or in a shed just because I had a baby. I would of course be cautious and make sure baby and dog aren't left alone, but other than that, my dogs life should remain the same.

My dog will hopefully still be alive by the time I have any kids(he'll definitely be a very senior dog though) and I just can't imagine moving him out of the house to live outside/in a shed. It breaks my heart just thinking about it

ShaShaBear

alroley wrote: »

I don't have any children, but do want them in the future. There is no way in hell my dog would get put outside or in a shed just because I had a baby. I would of course be cautious and make sure baby and dog aren't left alone, but other than that, my dogs life should remain the same.

My dog will hopefully still be alive by the time I have any kids(he'll definitely be a very senior dog though) and I just can't imagine moving him out of the house to live outside/in a shed. It breaks my heart just thinking about it

We were exactly the same, Shadow was almost 11 when Abigail was born and unfortunately we found out he had lymphoma when she was just 9 weeks old. So she spent a lot of time being babysat by my mother while we spoilt the dog. She'll never know any different, she won't remember that we "tossed her aside" in favour of the dog. She won't feel anger or begrudge us. But we know that if Shadow had any thoughts at the end, is that he was always our number one

Little_cub

Hello,
first time poster here but just wanted to share my not so happy experience of introducing my dog & new baby 😥 I rehomed my much loved terrier 10 months after the arrival of my son. We started to introduce any changes to routine months before the new arrival & set up baby gates between rooms etc to allow for seperation of our dog & baby if needed. Brought the baby vest home from hospital for our pooch to smell and had an excellent behaviourist (one who is regularly recommended on this forum) out to the house. But over the first few weeks it was clear that our dog was very unhappy. She was barking in the middle of the night, panting, constantly sneezing & pacing. We put it down to all the change and set about improving things. For the next 8 months we upped the training (3-4 ten min sessions per day of commands etc), gave stuffed kongs, I popped the baby in the sling & went for at LEAST 2 hour long walks per day (more at the weekends). Our poor dog was still stressed, as the baby got bigger and on the move she started nipping at his feet if he was in the high chair/bouncer/floor etc. I had to keep her separated from him at all times. We were all miserable. I looked into rehoming her, found a family who had older kids and had kept fiesty terriers all their lives. Went to visit them & they fell in love with her. She went to live with them and they send me pictures of her snuggled up on their sofa. As a life long dog lover I was devastated to find myself in this position. I had always judged people who rehomed dogs and firmly believed that a dog is a family member for life. Well I am sad to say that I am now part of the rehoming dog post baby cliche. I know lots & lots of people who have successfully integrated a baby & dog into their family & I'm sure for the OP it will be fine. I am sad to say it just didn't work out for us.

borderlinemeath

Little_cub wrote: »

Hello,
first time poster here but just wanted to share my not so happy experience of introducing my dog & new baby 😥 I rehomed my much loved terrier 10 months after the arrival of my son. We started to introduce any changes to routine months before the new arrival & set up baby gates between rooms etc to allow for seperation of our dog & baby if needed. Brought the baby vest home from hospital for our pooch to smell and had an excellent behaviourist (one who is regularly recommended on this forum) out to the house. But over the first few weeks it was clear that our dog was very unhappy. She was barking in the middle of the night, panting, constantly sneezing & pacing. We put it down to all the change and set about improving things. For the next 8 months we upped the training (3-4 ten min sessions per day of commands etc), gave stuffed kongs, I popped the baby in the sling & went for at LEAST 2 hour long walks per day (more at the weekends). Our poor dog was still stressed, as the baby got bigger and on the move she started nipping at his feet if he was in the high chair/bouncer/floor etc. I had to keep her separated from him at all times. We were all miserable. I looked into rehoming her, found a family who had older kids and had kept fiesty terriers all their lives. Went to visit them & they fell in love with her. She went to live with them and they send me pictures of her snuggled up on their sofa. As a life long dog lover I was devastated to find myself in this position. I had always judged people who rehomed dogs and firmly believed that a dog is a family member for life. Well I am sad to say that I am now part of the rehoming dog post baby cliche. I know lots & lots of people who have successfully integrated a baby & dog into their family & I'm sure for the OP it will be fine. I am sad to say it just didn't work out for us.

You might consider yourself part of the "rehoming dog post baby cliche" but you are NOTHING like the retriever owners as described by the OP. And there are so many like her, that discard their dog when the baby arrives without so much as a though for the dogs welfare. You did everything right, you got the behaviourist, and implemented all the recommended pre baby steps, you did the training, you tried to integrate, but sometimes, the dog can be too distressed to adjust. And terriers in particular can be fiesty and tenacious and you at least know that you did your very best for her. There's certain terriers eg westies - that find it really, really difficult to live with children, it's just not in their nature to deal with babies and toddlers but can adjust well to living with older children. It's fantastic you found a great home for her, some people will just dump in the pound.

hollytrees

Little cub, I'm sorry it didn't work out with your dog. I don't think you should feel bad at all. In fact my colleague would be doing her dog a favour if she rehomed him to a good home like you did. At the end of the day as much as we love our pets we have to consider the safety of babies. I would much prefer to do this to my dog than putting her out to shed when she is accustomed to being a very pampered pooch.

ShaShaBear

hollytrees wrote: »

Little cub, I'm sorry it didn't work out with your dog. I don't think you should feel bad at all. In fact my colleague would be doing her dog a favour if she rehomed him to a good home like you did. At the end of the day as much as we love our pets we have to consider the safety of babies. I would much prefer to do this to my dog than putting her out to shed when she is accustomed to being a very pampered pooch.

Exactly, if you are making a conscious decision to rehome your dog after exhausting all options, and because you want to ensure they have the exact same quality of life (or better) that you have been supplying them, then you are doing the best for your dog. But assuming that a dog will take to such a decline in quality of life with no resentment, upset or change in behavior is just silly. The poor pet will be distraught!

Whispered

When I brought my baby home from hospital I'll never forget the panic I felt as I walked into the room with my two dogs. Or the guilt I still feel for the panic lol.

I was tired from a newborn and weak and sore from surgery and I remember thinking I'd never be able to manage the two dogs and a baby. I felt incredibly vulnerable. Granted this was true for everything - I felt the same during our first day out. Having a newborn when you don't know what you're doing is terrifying!!

3 months in and there is very little "managing". The bigger boys (dogs) get their walk with offlead time at least 40 mins a day and I make sure to include them in everything as we always did.

I do have to be careful when it comes to toys, the oldest dog is very interested, so when the baby is playing with toys that dog is in his crate with a kong or something.

One thing I'd highly recommend to any dog owning mother is a wrap. You can strap the baby to you and go about your doggy business with two free hands. Great way for everyone to get used to each other too.

borderlinemeath

Whispered wrote: »

When I brought my baby home from hospital I'll never forget the panic I felt as I walked into the room with my two dogs. Or the guilt I still feel for the panic lol.

I was tired from a newborn and weak and sore from surgery and I remember thinking I'd never be able to manage the two dogs and a baby. I felt incredibly vulnerable. Granted this was true for everything - I felt the same during our first day out. Having a newborn when you don't know what you're doing is terrifying!!

3 months in and there is very little "managing". The bigger boys (dogs) get their walk with offlead time at least 40 mins a day and I make sure to include them in everything as we always did.

I do have to be careful when it comes to toys, the oldest dog is very interested, so when the baby is playing with toys that dog is in his crate with a kong or something.

One thing I'd highly recommend to any dog owning mother is a wrap. You can strap the baby to you and go about your doggy business with two free hands. Great way for everyone to get used to each other too.

I'd say this will be me:D

As much as I know what to do, putting it in practice and the reality of being responsible for another human being, that cries, needs constant feeding and nappy changing is going to be a scary overwhelming experience. And managing the needs of the dogs on top of it all.

I fully intend to get a sling or a wrap, we walk in fields or the beach so not ideal for a buggy. I'm lucky that himself is home based most of the time too, so I'll not be as "alone" as most mothers who's husbands have to go back to the office after a few paternal days off. Plus we have our wonderful neighbour who really enjoys walking our dogs.

Knine

It will all be great. I parent alone. I've 4 dogs, 2 Tropical fish tanks & guinea pigs. Puppies on the way. My youngest daughter has a severe disability.

Those dogs keep me sane.

Congrats Borderlinemeath.

ShaShaBear

borderlinemeath wrote: »

I'd say this will be me:D

As much as I know what to do, putting it in practice and the reality of being responsible for another human being, that cries, needs constant feeding and nappy changing is going to be a scary overwhelming experience. And managing the needs of the dogs on top of it all.

I fully intend to get a sling or a wrap, we walk in fields or the beach so not ideal for a buggy. I'm lucky that himself is home based most of the time too, so I'll not be as "alone" as most mothers who's husbands have to go back to the office after a few paternal days off. Plus we have our wonderful neighbour who really enjoys walking our dogs.

When are you due again? I'll be getting a wrap this time around too, it will make things much easier for me with a toddler and getting the pup used to a new baby.

borderlinemeath

ShaShaBear wrote: »

When are you due again? I'll be getting a wrap this time around too, it will make things much easier for me with a toddler and getting the pup used to a new baby.

27th August - Cocos 8th Birthday and Bensons 4th Home from rescue day
Starting to show now, and feeling little flutters from baby twisting and twirling around!

ShaShaBear

borderlinemeath wrote: »

27th August - Cocos 8th Birthday and Bensons 4th Home from rescue day
Starting to show now, and feeling little flutters from baby twisting and twirling around!

We're 1st December. Hoping for a girl so I can break out my arsenal of seasonal names :P

borderlinemeath

ShaShaBear wrote: »

We're 1st December. Hoping for a girl so I can break out my arsenal of seasonal names :P

https://www.dfa.ie/media/dfa/alldfawebsitemedia/passportcitizenship/Top-200-Names-passports.pdf

Have the boys name sorted, if it's a girl, we're still undecided!

Whispered

We were the same. Boys name picked from day one but couldn't decide on a girls name.

We started preparing the dogs from day one. Things like manners in the sittin room, rock solid "bed" command, loose lead walking. Things we would have been doing anyway, we just tightened it up a bit.
It was us who needed it more than them

How're your preparations going?

borderlinemeath

Whispered wrote: »

We were the same. Boys name picked from day one but couldn't decide on a girls name.

We started preparing the dogs from day one. Things like manners in the sittin room, rock solid "bed" command, loose lead walking. Things we would have been doing anyway, we just tightened it up a bit.
It was us who needed it more than them

How're your preparations going?

Well they're totally used to stairgates from the visitors, so it's no bother to them. They're more than happy in their zone of the hall where their beds are. All crate trained, Coco was the one who wasn't mad on crates, no bother with her now. Bensons barking will be the one thing that will need to be worked on, and without an actual baby it's proving tough. But he's not in any way aggressive, he's just very loud! He's very good at taking himself out of situations when he's not comfortable, and he's more than happy to go down the hall to his bed. Buddy is getting much better, he used to be a jumper but he's doing a lot less of it now. Every time he persisted with the jumping he was put out for a time out, and it's really worked with him, no more counter jumping, he never jumps on me, moreso when himself walks in because he's not as persistent at not rewarding unwanted behaviour as I am! His hand licking has also abated, but he still likes getting in for a sneaky lick.

Whispered

You sound sorted! You had a good base to start on

My two were great at doing things when asked but not so good with being polite in our house. Couch diving was a favourite sport

seamus

Little_cub wrote: »

Hello,
first time poster here but just wanted to share my not so happy experience of introducing my dog & new baby

As said, you are nothing like those people who instantly rehome/relegate a dog as soon as a child comes along. You did everything you could to make it work.

Sometimes it just doesn't work. We always told ourselves that we would make it work but at the end of the day we had a Plan Z that would involve rehoming the dog if it just became too dangerous. The dog had bitten me before* so people were nervous about us bringing the baby home, but we weren't. Nevertheless, it would have been reckless of us to not have a plan for absolute failure.
The circumstances of our property are such that it's impossible to isolate the dog from the baby all the time, so in the event that she became aggressive towards the baby we would be left without a choice.

Anyways, it never came to that. She pretty much just ignores the toddler because she knows the toddler can't provide food or satisfying belly rubs. Despite her stoicism in the house in relation to the child, she has always displayed a certain level of protectionism and makes a point of putting herself between other dogs and the pram/buggy and during the early months made a point of sleeping on the floor beside the moses basket.
We knew that everything easy going to be fine when the dog was lying on the cold floor one hot day and the toddler came sprinting down the room, tripping over the dog's head. Dog didn't even flinch, no sigh or groan, clearly just accepting of this new reality

The toddler adores the dog and we frequently have to stop/supervise her when trying to cuddle the dog, sit in the dog's bed, ride on the dog like a horse (even if she had 4 legs there's no way in hell that's happening), give food to the dog. At this stage we're more concerned about the child hurting the dog than the opposite way around.

*Absolutely, 100% my fault, my error in judgement. But it's incredibly difficult to make people understand this. "Good dogs don't bite"

borderlinemeath

Whispered wrote: »

You sound sorted! You had a good base to start on

My two were great at doing things when asked but not so good with being polite in our house. Couch diving was a favourite sport

Once I get the husband trained!! I keep saying to him that he has to be more consistent with Buddy, that when he jumps up he's not to pet him and he's to put him outside the door until he calms down. When I explain the reasoning behind it, that if he's holding the baby that there's a danger of a paw in the face he just says "You mean you'll let me hold the baby?"

He's going to be a walkover of a father:D

Frog Song

My heart just broke for that poor Golden Retriever Well done to all of the parents on here that made it work or at least tried to. So many don't. That poor dog must think he's being punished

Any way you could show her this thread OP? Or even show her a few articles online of the benefits of having a baby around pets? Easier said than done I know.

tk123

How many other people marked off all the "dogs" names on the lists in their head lol!! We met a lovely dog this morning named ...Dermot!

borderlinemeath

tk123 wrote: »

How many other people marked off all the "dogs" names on the lists in their head lol!! We met a lovely dog this morning named ...Dermot!

One of the boys names we have picked is a dog I know

Yeboah

My wife is expecting our first in early August..We have 4 dogs and a cat. We live in a rural cottage with lots of land for dogs to run around. The dogs live indoors and they will be staying indoors when the baby comes..We have turned our spare bedroom into a utility room and the utility room into the dogs space if they are wet and mucky after playing outside. We will need an extension I more children come along but animals are such a big part of our lives and they are part of our family.. The cat has moved from the nursery (just getting painted today) to the new utility and he have put in a cat flap so he can have his own space.

Long story short our animals might be changing bedrooms when baby comes but that's it

Whispered

I know this thread started with a sad story, but I hope the OP is heartened by seeing how it can and does work.

Oh I had an appt with the public health nurse for his 3 month check yesterday and she said it's great to have pets in the house for numerous reasons.

ShaShaBear

Whispered wrote: »

I know this thread started with a sad story, but I hope the OP is heartened by seeing how it can and does work.

Oh I had an appt with the public health nurse for his 3 month check yesterday and she said it's great to have pets in the house for numerous reasons.

Ours turned up her nose at Shadow and said something about dog hairs being small enough to choke on. I told her calmly that I would be skinning the dog before I let the baby eat him

Millem

For us there was were no problems at the start. Our human baby started walking unaided at 10 months I am convinced he started so early as he wanted to get to the dogs. He can be very rough at times with them at times not only will he pull their tails, he (human baby) will try and bite them!!!!!! He was running at 12 months - chasing after them screeching!!! We have taught him how to pet them gently, he has no fear of them at all and gets so excited when we come home and he hears them bark.
At dinner time he tries to spoonfed them!! And like the other poster he throws his food on the ground for them!! My dogs really deserve medals! They leave the room and go sit on couch in sitting room, bed in hall or upstairs beds.
They are super lazy so laze around (indoors) most of the day but I always make sure to bring them for a walk.
We have a playpen (baby cage) which is a vital piece of equipment. We put baby in there when the dogs need a break but also when I have to answer door etc.

Pre baby we had a dog bed upstairs, one in kitchen and one in hall so they spent a lot of time in those places.

hdowney

seamus wrote:

*Absolutely, 100% my fault, my error in judgement. But it's incredibly difficult to make people understand this. "Good dogs don't bite"

Yea I get that. I have been bitten by my dog twice. Both were 100% my fault. Scuse whilst I go let the little dog out and the big one in!!!

DeltaWhite

My pal bought and moved into a house last Aug. She never owned a dog in her life and she told me one day as casual as anything that she was getting a puppy. 8 weeks after moving in. I tried, and tried, and tried until I was blue in the face to talk her out of it. Especially when I heard what type of dog she was getting. A beautiful lab (my fave breed). She did not listen. The dog destroyed her house, because he was left alone ALL day everyday while she was at work, he wrecked the back garden from boredom and she thinks he has behaviour problems?

Then she got herself pregnant and the dog has not even been inside the house in 4 months. He sits out the back all day everyday looking very depressed to me, getting no attention or walks. I asked her what she was planning to do with him when the baby comes... "ah sure we'll just leave him out the back, I'm getting the house done up so he wont be allowed in again"


Riiiiiiiight.

It upsets me. I am a big massive fan of all kinds of dogs and I told her outstraight that what she did and is doing is cruel to the dog. Even offered to help her find someone I might know that will take him to live a happy life in a home where he is loved, because she only sees him as a nuisance now. She doesn't even have him a year! Furbabymomma, loved your post, you are a true dog person, going to all that to ensure you can all live as one big family! That's how it should be To OP - do not even entertain your colleague. Follow some of the sound advice on here and you will live happily with your doggy child aswell as your new baby Good luck!

Frog Song

DeltaWhite wrote: »

My pal bought and moved into a house last Aug. She never owned a dog in her life and she told me one day as casual as anything that she was getting a puppy. 8 weeks after moving in. I tried, and tried, and tried until I was blue in the face to talk her out of it. Especially when I heard what type of dog she was getting. A beautiful lab (my fave breed). She did not listen. The dog destroyed her house, because he was left alone ALL day everyday while she was at work, he wrecked the back garden from boredom and she thinks he has behaviour problems?

Then she got herself pregnant and the dog has not even been inside the house in 4 months. He sits out the back all day everyday looking very depressed to me, getting no attention or walks. I asked her what she was planning to do with him when the baby comes... "ah sure we'll just leave him out the back, I'm getting the house done up so he wont be allowed in again"


Riiiiiiiight.

It upsets me. I am a big massive fan of all kinds of dogs and I told her outstraight that what she did and is doing is cruel to the dog. Even offered to help her find someone I might know that will take him to live a happy life in a home where he is loved, because she only sees him as a nuisance now. She doesn't even have him a year! Furbabymomma, loved your post, you are a true dog person, going to all that to ensure you can all live as one big family! That's how it should be To OP - do not even entertain your colleague. Follow some of the sound advice on here and you will live happily with your doggy child aswell as your new baby Good luck!

Poor dog, keep trying with her to rehome him. He deserves better.

Dublingirl1972

hi there,
this was our dogs/children path

just married - rescue puppy medium size 8weeks
2 years later - 1st baby
3 years later - 2nd baby
2years later - 3rd baby
2years later - 2nd rescue dog small
3 years later - 3rd rescue dog larger - medium

1st dog is about to turn 15 and is old, white faced, stiff and sleeps a lot
1st child is about to turn 14 and is young, fresh faced and sleeps a lot : )

FurBabyMomma

Thanks Hooked and DeltaWhite for your nice comments, sorry I took so long to reply but I seem to have been neglecting boards of late! And Little Cub you're nothing like the person discussed in this thread, you did your best and ended up having to make a difficult but responsible decision. I think posters on here just take issue with people who don't even try and just automatically banish and neglect their dogs.

On the subject of the PHN, my dogs weren't in the house for her first visit as I had a section so my mother in law was minding them for a few days while my hubby got used to a very independent wife suddenly relying on him ;-) She went to put the baby in the bassinet and wrinkled her nose saying, is that dog hair in here? (Don't even know how it got there!) I looked at her deadpan and said, oh yes, the Rottweiler sheds. Well the face on her! Of course then I got the dog lecture but it was worth it :-p