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Intervening in kids bullying?

2

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    househero wrote: »
    Noooo. You can't perv on kids with CCTV. It does not stop the 'crime' it only records it.
    And allows us to enjoy the crime in comfort over and over again.


  • Posts: 26,920 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I intervened once in London when a young guy looked like he was going to give his girlfriend a punch. I was at a bus stop in the East End on the way to work and lost it completely. I managed to get the girl away from him who was in tears. They were only about 13 but I was scared, tbh but I'm glad I did something.

    You saw from their reaction today that they're essentially wimps. Tell them you're keeping an eye on them and if you see it happening again, you won't be alone next time.

    Fair play to you for doing something today though, Electro-Bitch:)

    Would you have intervened if it were a girl about this give her boyfriend a punch? I'm just curious.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 793 ✭✭✭LadyAthame


    This is what you do.

    Call one only over to you preferably the youngest or the one least partaking. Hey you in the red top come here for a moment. Just you.
    Talk quietly to him. The moment you do if you get him to come over the other two will stop. They won't come with him. Keep it brief. Don't talk about blondie. Don't mention blondie. 'Your acting like a thug, it's getting a bit over the top '. Tell him to stand to the side for a minute.

    Call over another (if the others have not run) do the same thing. Very quiet. Make them stop to try and listen.

    ONLY take SEPARATELY to them. Never talk to them as a group or in front of the group. Never talk to one of them in front of the group or let the group hear what you are saying. Don't mention the child being bullied. Take the focus off. You only talk a few seconds.

    More then likely they will leave. Then...
    Talk to the bullied child ask for the name of his school ..report the incident and give his name and the other names if you have them.


    If the fighting is really bad then call the guards.

    It might not work but there you go.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,513 ✭✭✭bb1234567


    You did exactly the right thing I think, it would be really wrong to just keep on walking...but physically touching the bullies or following them would be a bit over the line. Like after all you don't know the kid..theres only so much you can do as a stranger.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,812 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    househero wrote: »
    Noooo. You can't perv on kids with CCTV. It does not stop the 'crime' it only records it.


    Nobody's perving on kids, jesus, you're messing right? :pac:

    The CCTV acts as both a deterrent, and a recording device in case of any escalation of an incident. Incidents of bullying and misbehaviour have been dramatically reduced in the school as a result. There hasn't been anyone setting fires in the yard or telling teachers on yard duty "fcuk off ye fat cnut!" in a while :D


    (and no, that wasn't directed at me, I may be a fat cnut, but I'm not a teacher, thank fcuk!)

    Why waste the money on an expensive CCTV system when you could employ a bouncer to give the bullies sum grief in the playground.


    CCTV is a far more cost effective option, though I like the way you're thinking :pac:


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,555 ✭✭✭Roger Hassenforder


    LadyAthame wrote: »

    Call one only over to you preferably the youngest or the one least partaking. Hey you in the red top come here for a moment. Just you.
    Talk quietly to him. The moment you do if you get him to come over the other two will stop. They won't come with him. Keep it brief. Don't talk about blondie. Don't mention blondie. 'Your acting like a thug, it's getting a bit over the top '. Tell him to stand to the side for a minute.

    ONLY take SEPARATELY to them. Never talk to them as a group or in front of the group. Never talk to one of them in front of the group or let the group hear what you are saying. Don't mention the child being bullied. Take the focus off. You only talk a few seconds.

    i wouldnt be too quick to put myself in a position where i was on my own with anyones kid, not to mind a scrote, even if in public.

    "hey mister, you touched me...."


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,245 ✭✭✭myshirt


    You'd wanna be careful, kids carry knives these days, presumably under the pretence of peeling oranges as part of their lunch, but nevertheless, they are packing


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,555 ✭✭✭Roger Hassenforder


    I'll get my step-sister to PM ye lads....

    pix or GTFO


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,812 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    myshirt wrote: »
    You'd wanna be careful, kids carry knives these days, presumably under the pretence of peeling oranges as part of their lunch, but nevertheless, they are packing


    "These days"?

    I never left home without my genuine Swiss army knife in my pocket! :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,092 ✭✭✭househero


    Nobody's perving on kids, jesus, you're messing right? :pac:

    The CCTV acts as both a deterrent, and a recording device in case of any escalation of an incident. Incidents of bullying and misbehaviour have been dramatically reduced in the school as a result. There hasn't been anyone setting fires in the yard or telling teachers on yard duty "fcuk off ye fat cnut!" in a while :D


    (and no, that wasn't directed at me, I may be a fat cnut, but I'm not a teacher, thank fcuk!)





    CCTV is a far more cost effective option, though I like the way you're thinking :pac:

    I guess it depends on the school. But the feeling of being watched all the time is disgusting and personally I think its damaging to a persons wellbeing

    When they installed CCTV on our school bus, fights still happened as frequently and just as before they had cctv, people got caught. After it happened.
    Its just before, somebody said who it was and after, nobody would say as they knew it was on CCTV #usGangMentality

    Your own observations are probably more to the point. You have successful moved the bullying away from the school. But you have not stopped the cause at all. Treating the symptom doesn't cure the disease


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,086 ✭✭✭TheBeardedLady


    Would you have intervened if it were a girl about this give her boyfriend a punch? I'm just curious.


    I'm curious as to why your curious and wonder what the relevance is.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,092 ✭✭✭househero


    How do you know somebody is about to give somebody a punch???


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    I'm curious as to why your curious.
    I'm bi-curious.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 686 ✭✭✭Putin


    You saw from their reaction today that they're essentially wimps.

    All bullies are wimps and usually melt in the face of confrontation. They feed off apathy, removed the apathy and you remove the bullies.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78 ✭✭nathang20


    I would have to use a awful lot of restraint not to get involved. I would just picture one of my nephews in that situation. I don't particularly care how old the offenders are!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,086 ✭✭✭TheBeardedLady


    Putin wrote: »
    All bullies are wimps and usually melt in the face of confrontation. They feed off apathy, removed the apathy and you remove the bullies.


    They feed off fear. I don't think any victim is apathetic, I'd say they're too scared to react.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,092 ✭✭✭househero


    LadyAthame wrote: »
    This is what you do.

    Call one only over to you preferably the youngest or the one least partaking. Hey you in the red top come here for a moment. Just you.
    Talk quietly to him. The moment you do if you get him to come over the other two will stop. They won't come with him. Keep it brief. Don't talk about blondie. Don't mention blondie. 'Your acting like a thug, it's getting a bit over the top '. Tell him to stand to the side for a minute.

    Call over another (if the others have not run) do the same thing. Very quiet. Make them stop to try and listen.

    ONLY take SEPARATELY to them. Never talk to them as a group or in front of the group. Never talk to one of them in front of the group or let the group hear what you are saying. Don't mention the child being bullied. Take the focus off. You only talk a few seconds.

    More then likely they will leave. Then...
    Talk to the bullied child ask for the name of his school ..report the incident and give his name and the other names if you have them.


    If the fighting is really bad then call the guards.

    It might not work but there you go.

    Seems like what you would do to a 5 year old.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    They feed off fear. I don't think any victim is apathetic, I'd say they're too scared to react.
    I presume he was referring to homosexual bystanders?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 793 ✭✭✭LadyAthame


    Call the guards then.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78 ✭✭nathang20


    They feed off fear. I don't think any victim is apathetic, I'd say they're too scared to react.

    Its just pack mentality, that's all. Very easily controlled...


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,086 ✭✭✭TheBeardedLady


    nathang20 wrote: »
    Its just pack mentality, that's all. Very easily controlled...


    Certainly when adults intervene it is but among themselves, it's not so easy to control.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,066 ✭✭✭✭Happyman42


    You probably have the technology in your pocket...record it when you see it. Make sure they know if you see any more of it that your recording goes to the school and Gardai.
    Did it on a persistent fly-tipper on my property, the threat to send it to the council and Gardai had him eating out of my hand (still) and he removed the rubbish he had dumped. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,092 ✭✭✭househero


    Happyman42 wrote: »
    You probably have the technology in your pocket...record it when you see it. Make sure they know if you see any more of it that your recording goes to the school and Gardai.
    Did it on a persistent fly-tipper on my property, the threat to send it to the council and Gardai had him eating out of my hand (still) and he removed the rubbish he had dumped. :)

    Clever boy. Do this op. Although the poor bullied kid will be just as worried that he will be seen in YouTube being bullied too


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,066 ✭✭✭✭Happyman42


    househero wrote: »
    Clever boy. Do this op. Although the poor bullied kid will be just as worried that he will be seen in YouTube being bullied too

    If you get it on film you don't need to judge them, just tell them if you see any more of the behaviour then the tape goes to the school and Gardai.

    The look on my fly-tippers face when he saw the footage was just priceless(I just walked up beside him the next day and showed him it) I then said if the ground wasn't cleared by the next evening the Council environment dept and the Gardai would be getting a copy. Walked away from him. Job done next evening (although the cheeky pup asked me to give him a hand to lift a bit of it) :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,353 ✭✭✭Cold War Kid


    K4t wrote: »
    Studies have shown there is a direct correlation between parents voting No in the upcoming referendum on marriage and their kids being bullied.
    But bullying is just exercising their freedom of speech.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    here228 wrote: »
    Were they in uniform? Notify the principal of the school right away. Chances are the principal will be able to identify them if you're able to give any sort of description. Poor boy. There's a few schools close to the canal but a boys one particularly close by

    They were in uniform alright but I couldn't make it out (they had jackets and stuff and I was out range of my terrible eyesight). I can think of two lads' schools nearby (this was the part of the canal just up from the back of the roisin if you're heading down towards the cathedral)
    Happyman42 wrote: »
    You probably have the technology in your pocket...record it when you see it. Make sure they know if you see any more of it that your recording goes to the school and Gardai.
    Did it on a persistent fly-tipper on my property, the threat to send it to the council and Gardai had him eating out of my hand (still) and he removed the rubbish he had dumped. :)

    Yeah, that did occur to me (after the fact of course :o). I've got a €20 brick of a phone right now though unfortunately.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    But bullying is just exercising their freedom of speech.
    Beating someone up isn't speech..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,066 ✭✭✭✭Happyman42


    They were in uniform alright but I couldn't make it out (they had jackets and stuff and I was out range of my terrible eyesight). I can think of two lads' schools nearby (this was the part of the canal just up from the back of the roisin if you're heading down towards the cathedral)



    Yeah, that did occur to me (after the fact of course :o). I've got a €20 brick of a phone right now though unfortunately.

    They don't have to know the quality, or that you where too far away, they won't take the risk of being identified. Kids are more worried about being caught bullying these days.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,353 ✭✭✭Cold War Kid


    K4t wrote: »
    Beating someone up isn't speech..
    Freedom of expression so, and the verbal aspects are just freedom of speech. After all, to hell with those on the receiving end - as long as freedom of speech is the priority.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    Happyman42 wrote: »
    They don't have to know the quality, or that you where too far away, they won't take the risk of being identified. Kids are more worried about being caught bullying these days.

    No like there's actually not a camera on it. I broke or lost several phones in the past few months so I'm just not getting nice ones any more. I suppose I could just point it at them and make threats


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