Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

Loughc

yerwanthere123 wrote: »

Why tell your 362 Facebook friends that you've got manky teeth?

For the likes and you ok hun? x

Or in short, for attention.

yellowlabrador

trump again... the diet is still working

Welcome back anxiety. Damn. I was doing pretty good. I knew I should have made those cookies. The only thing I have confidence in right now, is chocolate. And God.

kitten_k

I like this one:

Today marks 6 months without drinking a drop of wine or any kinds of soda! 6 months without eating bread, cake or anything sweet. The change in my body has been fantastic, I feel great, I lost weight and my way of thinking is very positive... I'm looking to keep this up and go for more. Because I care!... no alcohol, eating healthy and above all, an hour of exercise every day!!!
I don't know who's status this is, but i said id copy and paste.😂😂😂😂

sligojoek

for those asking ******* is a little better today thanks he still wont be back to school tomorrow though, still got a high temperature and shaking like an epileptic....!!

.

Widdershins

I entered a competition run by a local company and my friend from England has liked and shared it to enter herself. I'm not sure whether she's planning to collect it it person or what..

Birneybau

Have a friend who's Australian and in turn, he has Australian friends.

Some guy commented on one of his posts, talking about the time he used to collect bins for a living as a student. Referred to himself as having been a 'Garbo'. Couldn't stop laughing at it.

Testament1

Birneybau wrote: »

Have a friend who's Australian and in turn, he has Australian friends.

Some guy commented on one of his posts, talking about the time he used to collect bins for a living as a student. Referred to himself as having been a 'Garbo'. Couldn't stop laughing at it.

Aussie slang is pretty useless alright. Have heard news presenters use "garbos" there before. Along with "ambos" (ambulance workers) and "fieries" (firefighters). Cringey nonsense!

Widdershins

Birneybau wrote: »

Have a friend who's Australian and in turn, he has Australian friends.

Some guy commented on one of his posts, talking about the time he used to collect bins for a living as a student. Referred to himself as having been a 'Garbo'. Couldn't stop laughing at it.

I've heard Garbyologist!

coolhull

Birneybau wrote: »

Have a friend who's Australian and in turn, he has Australian friends.

Some guy commented on one of his posts, talking about the time he used to collect bins for a living as a student. Referred to himself as having been a 'Garbo'. Couldn't stop laughing at it.

Maybe he's a distant cousin to Greta Garbo?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Testament1 wrote: »

Aussie slang is pretty useless alright. Have heard news presenters use "garbos" there before. Along with "ambos" (ambulance workers) and "fieries" (firefighters). Cringey nonsense!

Can't remember where I came across it, but I read of an Aussie woman talking about recovering from her "Missie".


Miscarriage.

lapua20grain

Kason Better Padlock wrote: »

Testament1 wrote: »

Aussie slang is pretty useless alright. Have heard news presenters use "garbos" there before. Along with "ambos" (ambulance workers) and "fieries" (firefighters). Cringey nonsense!

Can't remember where I came across it, but I read of an Aussie woman talking about recovering from her "Missie".


Miscarriage.

Strewth

Guy:Incognito

Kason Better Padlock wrote: »

Can't remember where I came across it, but I read of an Aussie woman talking about recovering from her "Missie".


Miscarriage.

Stone the flamin crows, that's a bit crude.

sligojoek

Garbo (aka In And Out)
(1990, from the movie and soundtrack release of Garbo)
[S. MacGowan / J. Finer]

Saint-Tropez in the golden days of the gorgeous Brigitte Bardot
Heaven's night is burning bright at the gates of El Dorado
I tasted sin among the bins down at Alvorado,
Melbourne's sweet, the sunny streets, the beauty of the garbo

In and Out
Catch me if you can
All the lovely sheilas love the garbo man

By the crack of dawn, as the day is born and the world is all aslumber
And amidst the dreams and unborn schemes and the rolls of distant thunder
If you should stir, you'll hear a word that will fill your heart with wonder,
As the garbo trucks take away the muck of last night's puke and chunder

In and Out
Catch me if you can
All the lovely sheilas love the garbo man

Follow me among the **** me boys stinking all and rough,
They'll never dump anything useful but they surely dump enough
I got me end away me boys a couple of times last night
But now I'm on the truck once more, I'm head to toe in ****e,
I'm ****faced and I'm stoned, I want to be alone,
But all the lovely Sheilas love a garbo man

In and Out
Catch me if you can
All the lovely sheilas love the garbo man

In and Out
Catch me if you can
All the lovely sheilas love the garbo man

via4

Love walking into somewhere and a certain someone doesn't expect to see u and their face drops ������ then they luck up ur arse ������

Ted_YNWA

via4 wrote:

Love walking into somewhere and a certain someone doesn't expect to see u and their face drops then they luck up ur arse

That is why you should always make an appointment at the proctologist.

Lisha

A picture of a dead black kitten on roadside. Then a pic of same in a box covered with a blanket and a flower.

PLEASE SHARE TO HELP FIND OWNERS
Black kitten found on the road near xxxx Animal Sanctuary, roughly 6-8 months old, probably hit by a car - no collar or ID Tag, looked well fed und was probably killed only a few hours ago, PLEASE SHARE this post to find the owners so they can find closure ;( prayers said and kitten is moved away from road to a safe place

While I appreciate the principle the photos of a dead kitten could really upset someone.

mackeire

Lisha wrote: »

A picture of a dead black kitten on roadside. Then a pic of same in a box covered with a blanket and a flower.

PLEASE SHARE TO HELP FIND OWNERS
Black kitten found on the road near xxxx Animal Sanctuary, roughly 6-8 months old, probably hit by a car - no collar or ID Tag, looked well fed und was probably killed only a few hours ago, PLEASE SHARE this post to find the owners so they can find closure ;( prayers said and kitten is moved away from road to a safe place

While I appreciate the principle the photos of a dead kitten could really upset someone.

I'd have just drove past it.

BattleCorp

mackeire wrote: »

I'd have just drove past it.

Or over it. 😉

Kal El

Potential Underachiever wrote: »

My sister recently had a child is also getting married next month, a million pics of the child and a million updates and countdowns about the wedding, it makes me so mad at times! She's grand in reality, I did say it to her before about her over use of fb, it wasn't received that warmly so now I have to bite my tongue and just scroll past everything she posts and never like any of it.

Ive hidden my sister, she just shouldnt have fb, to much inspirational pictures for my liking :pac:

coolhull

TYPES OF PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK:
1) The "Rooster" – Feels that it is their job to tell Facebook "Good Morning" every day !!
2) The "Lurker" – Never posts or comments on your post, but reads everything, and might make reference to your status if they see you in public.
3) The "Hyena" – Doesn't ever really say anything, just LOLs and LMAOs at everything.
4) "Mr/Ms Popular" – Has 4,367 friends for NO reason
5) The "Gamer" – Plays Words With Friends, Mafia Wars, Bakes virtual cakes and stuff, etc., ALL DAY.)
6) The "Cynic" – Hates their life, and everything in it, as evidenced by the sombre tone in ALL of their status updates.
7) The "Collector" – Never posts anything either, but joins every group and becomes fans of the most random stuff.
The "Promoter" – Always sends event invitations to things that you ultimately delete or ignore.
9) The "Liker" – Never actually says anything, but always clicks the "like" button
10) "Drama Queen/ King" – This person always posts stuff like "I
can't believe this!", or "They gonna make me snap today!", in
the hopes that you will ask what happened, or what's wrong but I then they never finish telling the story.
11) The "News" – Always updates you on what they are doing and who they are doing it with, no matter how arbitrary, and Lastly
12) The "Thief" – Steals status updates... and will probably steal this one....

Just like I did!!!

marcbrophy

Nevermind...

mojesius

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10202577835003849&id=1735789529

My favourite comment: 'yes hun she was a fat yolk with black hair and red dress'.

sullivlo

The one going around of the outrage at being sent an unsolicited picture of a man playing with his balls (and the picture posted in the comments) was, at best, mildly humourous the first time.

After the 9th time it gets boring.

AndrewJRenko

Well y'all, I'm gonna say bye-bye to some of you.. Now I'm watching the ones who will have the time to read this post until the end. This is a little test, just to see who reads and who shares without reading! If you have read everything, select "like" so i can put a thank u on ur profile. Though my friends may be few, I hope all my contacts can take an extra minute to pause and think of all those whose lives have been changed because of this disease.
Please, in honor of someone who died, or is fighting cancer, or even had cancer, copy and paste.
Write "done" in comments when you're finished so a thank you can be put on ur profile!

followed by;
Done
Done
Done
Done
Done

..I get a ton of these a week..sorry if I don't share

My phone doesn't let me copy and paste. 

I would be done if I new how to copy and paste I have two sisters with breast cancer

I don't share or copy but I like to be your friend forever.


Yes, My dear sister xxxdied of cancer as well as xxx, your Uncle and my Brother-in-law. Please forgive me, but I do not know how to post, copy, paste nor share. Hopefully I think I may know how to like, but not sure. You are wonderful !!!!

rawn

The ironing is delicious

"Aw no I must have annoyed you to the point where you unfriend me 😢 at least now you can aim your ****ty posts more slyly to your "friends" about me 😀 Toodles love 😘"

Olishi4

My mam was saying to me "Olishi, what's go live mean on Facebook?"

I don't really know or use it myself and I only ever saw one friend put something up live once but anyway my mam was saying that she saw a post from my aunt that was live and it was just her looking curiously from under glasses through the camera for about two minutes! She must have hit the wrong button

nikpmup

Ffs.

El Weirdo

nikpmup wrote: »

Ffs.

#AMEN

kunst nugget

nikpmup wrote: »

Ffs.

OMG! I can't believe you made me look at a disable!!!

mansize

Leg disable