Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

whoopsadoodles

rawn wrote: »

It's not what he's doing that bothers me, it's the "words" he uses to explain it!

It's from a FB page called scottish patter.

Scottish people often post how the phonetically speak.

If you read everything on the FB page in Kevin Bridges' voice it's far easier to understand.

whoopsadoodles

For example....

Gravelly

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

For example....

He has a point. My wife has a friend who has two spectacularly ugly children (which is weird because both parents are quite good looking) but every time she puts up a picture of their troll-like faces, all the women rush to post about how pretty they are. Liars.

marcbrophy

Gravelly wrote: »

He has a point. My wife has a friend who has two spectacularly ugly children (which is weird because both parents are quite good looking) but every time she puts up a picture of their troll-like faces, all the women rush to post about how pretty they are. Liars.

Jaysis

Gravelly

marcbrophy wrote: »

Jaysis

Believe me, I'm not doing them a disservice. I'm understating if anything.

sligojoek

Apy burtay mate av a gudun

team_actimel

Gravelly wrote: »

He has a point. My wife has a friend who has two spectacularly ugly children (which is weird because both parents are quite good looking) but every time she puts up a picture of their troll-like faces, all the women rush to post about how pretty they are. Liars.

True. I have an FB friend who puts up a new profile pic every month or so which looks like a mug shot. Usually gets 100 likes and loads of comments saying 'stunnin hun' when all I can see is a gremlin face.

I've noticed a lot of women find it easier to comment/like uglier people's photos cos it makes them feel better, than it is to comment on a genuinely beautiful woman's photo.

Samsgirl

Just made medium rare chicken strips. They are so good, I can't believe I haven't tried them like this before. Can't wait to dig in with my home made salad and veggies.

Pic of raw chicken strips on a plate of salad!!!!!

Comment: eh, you are going to get salmonella.
Op reply: eh, no. This is chicken, not salmon

team_actimel

Samsgirl wrote: »

Just made medium rare chicken strips. They are so good, I can't believe I haven't tried them like this before. Can't wait to dig in with my home made salad and veggies.

Pic of raw chicken strips on a plate of salad!!!!!

Comment: eh, you are going to get salmonella.
Op reply: eh, no. This is chicken, not salmon

I saw that, it's been shared and liked thousands of times. Keep popping up on my news feed.

Samsgirl

team_actimel wrote: »

I saw that, it's been shared and liked thousands of times. Keep popping up on my news feed.

Yep. Saw it a few times over the weekend too
Unreal

Taylor365

team_actimel wrote: »

True. I have an FB friend who puts up a new profile pic every month or so which looks like a mug shot. Usually gets 100 likes and loads of comments saying 'stunnin hun' when all I can see is a gremlin face.

I've noticed a lot of women find it easier to comment/like uglier people's photos cos it makes them feel better, than it is to comment on a genuinely beautiful woman's photo.

That's the difference between pity and envy.

Widdershins

I once saw someone comment what a lovely nose someone else has, under their profile picture. She has quite a big nose.

Widdershins

''Can anyone think of anyway this could go wrong when Trump gives the speech in front of 50 leaders of Muslim countries? The one saving grace is these leaders know exactly what to expect from Trump and their culture is one of tolerance especially of guests.''

Tolerance might be stretching it a bit, especially where Saudi Arabia is concerned.

stinkle

Not so much a status, but I keep seeing FB friends liking all these "fashion blogs". Except most of them are just pictures of Penney's shyte that anyone could just find for themselves by wandering around the shop.

benjamin d

stinkle wrote: »

Not so much a status, but I keep seeing FB friends liking all these "fashion blogs". Except most of them are just pictures of Penney's shyte that anyone could just find for themselves by wandering around the shop.

"Fashion bloggers" were the female equivalent of personal trainers all the lads became when the recession hit. Thankfully the likes of 'Joe Bloggs PT' posting "fitspo" crap seems to have died away in recent times.

Gravelly

benjamin d wrote: »

"Fashion bloggers" were the female equivalent of personal trainers all the lads became when the recession hit. Thankfully the likes of 'Joe Bloggs PT' posting "fitspo" crap seems to have died away in recent times.

I must be hanging out with a less fashionable crowd, because there's still a pile of that going on when I pop on there.

sullivlo

A few people who are currently in Dublin, who have been here for weeks, and haven't left the country, have checked in safe in Manchester.

coolhull

"Always have fresh ice cubes for whenever you need them ...

Get an ice tray (most good shops sell them)

Fill the tray with water

Pop it into the freezer compartment of your fridge.

Leave for three to four hours.

When you take it out, you will have lots of lovely cold ice for your summer drinks! "


Bet you never thought of that, did you?
Cold ice? As opposed to that hot ice that ruins your drinks?

team_actimel

sullivlo wrote: »

A few people who are currently in Dublin, who have been here for weeks, and haven't left the country, have checked in safe in Manchester.

Saps.

kunst nugget

coolhull wrote: »

"Always have fresh ice cubes for whenever you need them ...

Get an ice tray (most good shops sell them)

Fill the tray with water

Pop it into the freezer compartment of your fridge.

Leave for three to four hours.

When you take it out, you will have lots of lovely cold ice for your summer drinks! "


Bet you never thought of that, did you?
Cold ice? As opposed to that hot ice that ruins your drinks?

Can't wait for their next installment of the bloody obvious…

Get two tea bags (most good shops sell them)

Stick them in a teapot.

Fill it with boiling water.

Let it draw for a couple of minutes.

When you pour it out, you will have a couple of cups of lovely tea!

drake70

coolhull wrote: »

"Always have fresh ice cubes for whenever you need them ...

Get an ice tray (most good shops sell them)

Fill the tray with water

Pop it into the freezer compartment of your fridge.

Leave for three to four hours.

When you take it out, you will have lots of lovely cold ice for your summer drinks! "


Bet you never thought of that, did you?
Cold ice? As opposed to that hot ice that ruins your drinks?

None of that frozen ice for me, I prefer mine fresh.

sligojoek

Nice one CH.

I had that recipe years ago but I lost it.

mackeire

team_actimel wrote: »

Saps.

I think you mean 'safe saps'

Ted_YNWA

kunst nugget wrote:

When you pour it out, you will have a couple of cups of lovely tea!

But where do I pour it to?

kunst nugget

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

But where do I pour it to?

Your trouser pockets obvs.

Neil Issagum

Ny1 no if pinerny its betta den electric iceland or wa

No it not its worst den perpay

How u no

Me antie had eh swith straight bak te perpay

Im wit pinregy now dono wa t do guna swith bak

Pinenery dont rob ye

El Weirdo

Neil Issagum wrote: »

Ny1 no if pinerny its betta den electric iceland or wa

No it not its worst den perpay

How u no

Me antie had eh swith straight bak te perpay

Im wit pinregy now dono wa t do guna swith bak

Pinenery dont rob ye

I'm guessing these are all different people. Were they in the same class at school?

Neil Issagum

El Weirdo wrote: »

I'm guessing these are all different people. Were they in the same class at school?

I don't know if they were in the same class, but if they were it certainly wasn't an English or economics class

Neil Issagum

coolhull wrote: »

"Always have fresh ice cubes for whenever you need them ...

Get an ice tray (most good shops sell them)

Fill the tray with water

Pop it into the freezer compartment of your fridge.

Leave for three to four hours.

When you take it out, you will have lots of lovely cold ice for your summer drinks! "


Bet you never thought of that, did you?
Cold ice? As opposed to that hot ice that ruins your drinks?

You've got to start selling this for more than a dollar a bag. We lost four more men on this expedition!

If you can think of a better way to get ice I'd like to hear it

clairewithani

El Weirdo wrote: »

I'm guessing these are all different people. Were they in the same class at school?

Did they ever go to school?

And if so, did the govt get the money back from teachers who taught them?