Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

snowflaker

fussyonion wrote: »

"Conor mcgregor is a RIDE He can crack an egg in my ar*e and f*** me til its scrambled".

From a delightfully eloquent young lady on my timeline.

I doubt this one did well in Home Ec

Shakera! Put down those eggs and pull your knickers up!

snowflaker

mackeire wrote: »

That reminds me of the time a girl I know was looking for the number of the Chinese on Facebook because, and I quote, "my Google isn't working".

They should bing it!

Mena Mitty

He gorgus !!! U 1 lucky biach congrats hun he has loada crisma 2.


I don't know if he has loads of charisma or he's driving a Skoda Crisma mk 2 :-)

Guy:Incognito

snowflaker wrote: »

They should bing it!

They could always ask jeeves, he's a good sort.

Potential Underachiever

mackeire wrote: »

That reminds me of the time a girl I know was looking for the number of the Chinese on Facebook because, and I quote, "my Google isn't working".

You have to be sure you don't wing the wong number.

rawn

"Ouuuuu is your ma on line /. I need to talk. Her xx"

rawn

"Ouuuuu is your ma on line /. I need to talk. Her xx"

coolhull

rawn wrote: »

"Ouuuuu is your ma on line /. I need to talk. Her xx"

Yeh im heer hon. Tawke aweigh, noboddy will no wot weer sane to eech udder

Ted_YNWA

coolhull wrote:

Yeh im heer hon. Tawke aweigh, noboddy will no wot weer sane to eech udder

Ur kleerly nt sane tlkin 2 udders.

Schwanz

"Everyone can fcuk off, I'm a lone parent and use putting up photos of them with there fella is out of order, have some respect ffs!!!!!"

5.15 this morning after being in a club......

No words

...And Justice

Schwanz wrote: »

"Everyone can fcuk off, I'm a lone parent and use putting up photos of them with there fella is out of order, have some respect ffs!!!!!"

5.15 this morning after being in a club......

No words

I'm not sure what she means? Is she píssed off that people are posting photos with their boyfriends and she has no one?

Schwanz

...And Justice wrote: »

I'm not sure what she means? Is she píssed off that people are posting photos with their boyfriends and she has no one?

I'd say she was locked and just a bit jealous the mad thing

ArnoldJRimmer

Just read this comment about Kevin McStay, manager of Roscommon, after their surprise win in the Connacht final

'av 2 hand it 2 him----didnt c it kumin bi a mile'

coolhull

"My baby, my heart & soul. Please please keep her in your prayers that God is looking at her & keeping her safe wherever she may be😔 ‼️ ** It's likely she was stolen for reselling or breeding purposes so please reshare‼️ Every pair of eyes that see her helps she could be anywhere with anyone.‼️ Help my baby home😪"

Then she posted pictures of her 'baby'
A huge Alsation, missing from Carmel, California.
Still, I'll keep an eye out for her down here in the South East of Ireland. Dogs can travel far, you know.

Schwanz

"Don't worry Big D*ck, I won't be telling any1 bout me and you last night xxxx"

Left as her status for 6 hours today lmao

Grayson

Schwanz wrote: »

"Don't worry Big D*ck, I won't be telling any1 bout me and you last night xxxx"

Left as her status for 6 hours today lmao

That could have just been a frape

El Weirdo

Balmed Out wrote: »

To wet the baby's head means to have a night out with new father celebrating birth of baby.

Correct.

Painting the baby's bedroom = sex with a pregnant woman.

Lorelli!

I kept seeing posts today called "June memories" which reshow posts made in June. Its only July ffs, not like it was that long ago!

Richard Hillman

🀣🀣🀣"please smell minded people make yeah laugh never knew that about my self first i heard of it but its all good because i dont give to flying ****s what other people think of me its great to know people are talking a load a bullocks about it they must have nothing better to be doing in there owe sad pathetic low life then making **** up about someone in one ear an out the other wont get me down smiles all around life to short to listen to as holes mother ****ers rant over ðŸ‘😊😊 an to make it all clear to everyone who thinks it an talking about it i didnt marry my husband for money so he can get a green card we are over a 8 year of relationship for a different reasons I don't have to explain myself to anyone my an his business no one eles now jog the **** on with your owe pathetic lifes peace out"

anewme

Bit of a sad one from our local councillor...

Terrible that a few weeks after Pride - We Get this horrible vile addressed envelope off some homophobic person containing catholic related information We respect all peoples lives all we ask is people respect ours

(Accompanied by poorly written envelope addressed to both gentleman c/o **** pushers den and their home address....and a 28c stamp)

This guy does Trojan work for his community, housing, poor, St Patrick's parade and organises the food cloud for the homeless. Needless to say, he's getting a lot of support.

sullivlo

whoopsadoodles

anewme wrote: »

Bit of a sad one from our local councillor...

Terrible that a few weeks after Pride - We Get this horrible vile addressed envelope off some homophobic person containing catholic related information We respect all peoples lives all we ask is people respect ours

(Accompanied by poorly written envelope addressed to both gentleman c/o **** pushers den and their home address....and a 28c stamp)

This guy does Trojan work for his community, housing, poor, St Patrick's parade and organises the food cloud for the homeless. Needless to say, he's getting a lot of support.

I saw the envelope.

It was written with a non dominant hand (i.e. written with the left hand by a right handed person or vice versa).

Imo, it should have been put in the bin and no more said about it. The gobshytes who sent it get satisfaction only out of knowing it's been received and gotten a reaction.

They put 28 cent stamp on it so if it had never been put up on social media, they would be sitting wondering if it was ever received and the joke would have been firmly back on them.

Now they're giggling away to themselves at the effectiveness of their juvenile prank.

optogirl

secondrowgal

optogirl wrote: »

I call shenanigans! No "Telpis"!!

inforfun

They forgot one.

kunst nugget

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

I saw the envelope.

It was written with a non dominant hand (i.e. written with the left hand by a right handed person or vice versa).

Imo, it should have been put in the bin and no more said about it. The gobshytes who sent it get satisfaction only out of knowing it's been received and gotten a reaction.

They put 28 cent stamp on it so if it had never been put up on social media, they would be sitting wondering if it was ever received and the joke would have been firmly back on them.

Now they're giggling away to themselves at the effectiveness of their juvenile prank.

Yeah, I really don't get why people post these things on facebook. It always looks like someone playing the victim for likes. Just bin the fúcking thing and get on with your life.

El Weirdo

I've just had a 48 hour Facebook ban for posting links to some badass stuff that the Zionist Jews would rather I didn't mention. Lolz!

Come on, which one of you scumbags reported me?

To be fair, I quite enjoyed the peace and quiet for a while...

:-D

Conspiracy nut I quoted way back in the thread.

Love2love

"The saddest thing about Betrayal is that it never comes from your enemy"

benjamin d

Love2love wrote: »

"The saddest thing about Betrayal is that it never comes from your enemy"

My first thought when I read that...

Love2love

benjamin d wrote: »

My first thought when I read that...

Mine was on a backdrop pic from either The Godfather or Goodfellaz, can't remember which. Adds value to it, don't you think?