Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

gimmick

fussyonion wrote: »

"Why o why do kids always wanta use the tiolet when yer after asking them do they want to use it???? out in the square today with caitlin and asked her BE4 WE LEFT if she wanta use the toliet and she was mammy i dont i dont right grand we left and wear only in the fcukin door at boots and its mammy mammy i need the tyla caitlin for fcuk sake im after askin ya BE4ORE WE LEFT!!!! So then im in smyths breakin me arms carryin toys and fcukin owl 1s gettin in the way as usual wit their throllies and then again mammy mammy i need the tyla!! if i didnt no any better id swear the child had systitis. 4 times she ended up goin and now im frazzled and there;ll be mcdonalds for the dinner cos theres no way in fcuk im cooking tonight, james will have to swing for his crispy pancakes. #happyfcukinchristmas"

Is this legitimate or from a parody? If legit I despair every more for the future of our species.

Brilliant though

sligojoek

Christmas withdoubt war no Monsanto the bees back to put a buzz back in Christmas and to save our planet for all man kinde not for a chosen few and lots of love

.

jimmii

Christmas withdoubt war no Monsanto the bees back to put a buzz back in Christmas and to save our planet for all man kinde not for a chosen few and lots of love

I'm sure this is what tiny tim would have said at the end of Scrooge if it had been written now!

mfceiling

From reading a lot of posts here I wonder what is going wrong with the teaching of English in schools.
Is it laziness, stupidity or the reliance on text talk?

jimmii

mfceiling wrote: »

From reading a lot of posts here I wonder what is going wrong with the teaching of English in schools.
Is it laziness, stupidity or the reliance on text talk?

I used to think it was purely down to people being lazy but when you see people write be4ore it really makes you wonder. In reality it appears that Idiocracy could well become our future!

fussyonion

gimmick wrote: »

Is this legitimate or from a parody? If legit I despair every more for the future of our species.

Brilliant though

Sadly, it's legitimate.

Lisha

fussyonion wrote: »

Sadly, it's legitimate.

That's scary

Tetra

An American friend of mine has moved from California to Denver, Colorado:

It's so quiet here.... No banda bumping next door, no shout matches outside, no gossiping hooker trannies in tacky outfits yaaaaasing as they take selfies, no fire engine or cop cars running by at all...
What do I do with all this silence? It's foreign and unnatural....

The Randy Riverbeast

jimmii wrote: »

I used to think it was purely down to people being lazy but when you see people write be4ore it really makes you wonder. In reality it appears that Idiocracy could well become our future!

Idiocracy wasn't so bad. They wanted people who were smarter than them to lead rather than people voting for politicians as dumb as themselves.

yellowlabrador

watch out folks,

RainyDay

From a relatively normal American cousin, mid-level manager in an insurance business over there;

THANK YOU, MARK ZUCKERBERG, for your forward-thinking generosity! And congrats on becoming a dad!
Mark Zuckerberg has announced that he is giving away $45 billion of Facebook stock. What you may not have heard is that he plans to give 10% of it away to people like YOU and ME! All you have to do is copy and paste this message into a post IMMEDIATELY and tag 5-10 of your friends. At midnight PST, Facebook will search through the day's posts and award 1000 people with $4.5 million EACH as a way of saying thank you for making Facebook such a powerful vehicle for connection and philanthropy.
I hope someone I know gets a piece of the pie--let me know if you do!!!
First of all Mark, FB is an amazing invention and such a great way to stay in touch w/family and friends...so thank you!!!

It took about an hour for a friend to post the link to the snopes debunking.

BattleCorp

yellowlabrador wrote: »

watch out folks,

Oh sh1t. Panic panic panic. We are all going to die. I better pray to God/Allah/John Travolta or else I'm in trouble.

Where is CMK so I can stay the fcuk away from "their" today.

jimmii

BattleCorp wrote: »

Oh sh1t. Panic panic panic. We are all going to die. I better pray to God/Allah/John Travolta or else I'm in trouble.

Where is CMK so I can stay the fcuk away from "their" today.

Looks like its a phone company in Philippines we should be ok. Phew.

Shannon757

fussyonion wrote: »

"Why o why do kids always wanta use the tiolet when yer after asking them do they want to use it???? out in the square today with caitlin and asked her BE4 WE LEFT if she wanta use the toliet and she was mammy i dont i dont right grand we left and wear only in the fcukin door at boots and its mammy mammy i need the tyla caitlin for fcuk sake im after askin ya BE4ORE WE LEFT!!!! So then im in smyths breakin me arms carryin toys and fcukin owl 1s gettin in the way as usual wit their throllies and then again mammy mammy i need the tyla!! if i didnt no any better id swear the child had systitis. 4 times she ended up goin and now im frazzled and there;ll be mcdonalds for the dinner cos theres no way in fcuk im cooking tonight, james will have to swing for his crispy pancakes. #happyfcukinchristmas"

Definitely Limerick City accent on this one. Am i right?

PTH2009

some people with learning difficulties should not be allowed near facebook they post the most annoying crap like those friend survey things etc.

i also hate people who set up pages like 'pictures of drunk people', 'Embarrasing people' etc. they should be caught and jailed or fined.

there are course know which teaches people how to use facebook. i saw one in the paper which cost 60 euro to do. :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:. what is wrong with people

Sittingpretty

Shannon757 wrote: »

Definitely Limerick City accent on this one. Am i right?

Hardly if they're shopping at the Square

Have you ever heard a Limerick accent

"Tyleh" is about as Dub as it comes.

I believe "Tylit" would be the Limerick scanger equivalent

Shannon757

Sittingpretty wrote: »

Hardly if they're shopping at the Square

Have you ever heard a Limerick accent

"Tyleh" is about as Dub as it comes.

I believe "Tylit" would be the Limerick scanger equivalent

Believe me i've heard one. Too manty times

rawn

A hairdressing type page posted this along with a picture of a wig they sell

"Heat Me,Curl Me,straighten Me,Wash Me,Style Me,brush Me,I'm a Human Hair Mix,you Can Do A lot With Me! I'm Thick And Lush At 140grm!! I'm A one Piece Wholehead Clip In hair Extension With 5 Clips Attached! I take Less Than 1 Minute To Attach and I'm Triple Wefted! I come in Many Colours You can Heat Me Up a To 160 degrees! And Best Of All I Am Only £10.00!!"

The wig must decrease IQ levels...

Sittingpretty

Shannon757 wrote: »

Believe me i've heard one. Too manty times

Well I can speak fluent Limerick being a native SO THERE!

RainyDay

PTH2009 wrote: »

some people with learning difficulties should not be allowed near facebook they post the most annoying crap like those friend survey things etc.

i also hate people who set up pages like 'pictures of drunk people', 'Embarrasing people' etc. they should be caught and jailed or fined.

there are course know which teaches people how to use facebook. i saw one in the paper which cost 60 euro to do. :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:. what is wrong with people

Just to be clear - this is something you saw posted, right?

jimmii

RainyDay wrote: »

Just to be clear - this is something you saw posted, right?

If not then the irony is strong with this one!

fussyonion

Shannon757 wrote: »

Believe me i've heard one. Too manty times

Nah, it was a Dublin accent.

spud82

"For fux sake anodder jon rejection. Fooking cake was full of Polish and the one who interviewed me to was one of them aswell so obvo wasn;t gonna get picked. all they do is hire each other. Sicknered"


I deleted him, after reading this

BattleCorp

spud82 wrote: »

"For fux sake anodder jon rejection. Fooking cake was full of Polish and the one who interviewed me to was one of them aswell so obvo wasn;t gonna get picked. all they do is hire each other. Sicknered"


I deleted him, after reading this

English teacher interview?

sligojoek

THANK YOU, MARK ZUCKERBERG, for your forward-thinking generosity! And congrats on becoming a dad!
Mark Zuckerberg has announced that he is giving away $45 billion of Facebook stock. What you may not have heard is that he plans to give 10% of it away to people like YOU and ME! All you have to do is copy and paste this message into a post IMMEDIATELY. At midnight PST, Facebook will search through the day's posts and award 1000 people with $4.5 million EACH as a way of saying thank you for making Facebook such a powerful vehicle for connection and philanthropy.
I hope someone I know gets a piece of the pie--let me know if you do!!!

I've seen ten of these today.

mahoganygas

Sicknered.

I'm adding that gem to my vocabulary.

Ted_YNWA

spud82 wrote: »

"For fux sake anodder jon rejection. Fooking cake was full of Polish and the one who interviewed me to was one of them aswell so obvo wasn;t gonna get picked. all they do is hire each other. Sicknered"


I deleted him, after reading this

Can see why Jon rejected him/her.

coolhull

"Fookin cake full of Polish"
I've heard of cakes full of fruit, cakes full of sugar, and cakes full of mineral, but what would you do with a cake full of polish?

Ted_YNWA

Shoe polish or nail polish, either way will clean the system out.

Hammer89

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

Can see why Jon rejected him/her.

I assume by Jon he meant he was rejected from a toilet, likely because he planned to sit on the sink and do heroin.