Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

mud · 24-01-2016 2:02pm

The Sun King wrote: »

Not a post exactly, more a type of poster.

I love people who organise fights with strangers on FB and try to make it out that they are gangland bosses.

'U don't kno me. I cn hav it arangd dat u gt 2 kno mee.'

Tosspots.

Ha ha ha! I don't have anyone like this on my friend list but that is absolute poetry.

I overheard a conversation lately where one person was complaining to their friend that they weren't getting enough likes on their photos. The friend suggested that it was because she had uploaded 57 photos from a single evening in with her friend and ain't no one got time for that. The uploader didn't seem convinced that that was the reason.

Tea-a-Maria · 24-01-2016 6:32pm

Spotted on a friend of a friend's page:

Came up to Dublin today to buy a jumper and some Wrangler jeans and as I was walking down an alleyway I saw a guard taking a chicken sandwich off a homeless woman. And I stood their in my new jeans confused as to what to do. Will I tell the guard to give her back her chicken roll? Bad enough taking it off someone who's going home to eat it but your one was homeless. It was a bit **** but then as I was thinking about it I realised it wasn't really the guards fault either. The ones to blame are Enda Kenny and the boys. What the **** are they at? I worked as a foreman in Galway telling lads how to build a shed properly. The place went to **** cos I didn't know what I was at. I got fired. I went back and apologised to all the lads on the site that I'd ****ed them over. Kenny should do the same. On the bus back now to Mayo very angry because not only is Enda Kenny a fellow Mayo man, but also cos I bought the wrangler jeans a size too small so I've got a dose of moose knuckle. Bye

RonanP77 · 24-01-2016 6:55pm

The Sun King wrote:

'U don't kno me. I cn hav it arangd dat u gt 2 kno mee.'

Are you sure that's not some form of semi-literate flirting?

Neil Issagum · 24-01-2016 7:01pm

4 hours up and 4 hours down just to buy a jumper and a pair of jeans!? Don't they have shops in Mayo?

IvyTheTerrible · 24-01-2016 7:07pm

It sounds like something that should have been posted on the 8th of December (and if there wasn't a reference to Enda, in the mid-nineties!)

Potential Underachiever · 24-01-2016 7:41pm

Tea-a-Maria wrote: »

Spotted on a friend of a friend's page:

Came up to Dublin today to buy a jumper and some Wrangler jeans and as I was walking down an alleyway I saw a guard taking a chicken sandwich off a homeless woman. And I stood their in my new jeans confused as to what to do. Will I tell the guard to give her back her chicken roll? Bad enough taking it off someone who's going home to eat it but your one was homeless. It was a bit **** but then as I was thinking about it I realised it wasn't really the guards fault either. The ones to blame are Enda Kenny and the boys. What the **** are they at? I worked as a foreman in Galway telling lads how to build a shed properly. The place went to **** cos I didn't know what I was at. I got fired. I went back and apologised to all the lads on the site that I'd ****ed them over. Kenny should do the same. On the bus back now to Mayo very angry because not only is Enda Kenny a fellow Mayo man, but also cos I bought the wrangler jeans a size too small so I've got a dose of moose knuckle. Bye

That was posted by Owen Colgan a.k.a this guy from Hardy Bucks.

Tea-a-Maria · 24-01-2016 8:47pm

Potential Underachiever wrote: »

That was posted by Owen Colgan a.k.a this guy from Hardy Bucks.

That shows me. Slightly relieved that's not real!

dirkmeister · 24-01-2016 10:06pm

Sum pple in dis twn think im fukn blind and fukn stupid but Il just bied my time on dis One and it will be dealt with when da time is rite

mahoganygas · 25-01-2016 9:44am

"Stacey ***** cheatin pox so wat ever poore cnut ends up wit her b Carful mad tab junky of a thing"

"U alri cuz"

"Ye just sigl again feels fukkin great x"

"A tatll change next week ha x"

"O no i mean it time to tink of me wonr be no tramps controlin me cuz"

"Pm"

RainyDay · 26-01-2016 11:58am

Neil Issagum wrote: »

4 hours up and 4 hours down just to buy a jumper and a pair of jeans!? Don't they have shops in Mayo?

They have shops all right, but they ran out of Wrangler jeans around 1989, like most of the rest of the civilised world.

Fakman87 · 28-01-2016 12:37am

Not dumb or great but a FB friend has had a picture of his stillborn baby as his profile pic for several months now. I forgot about it until I just saw it again now. Fairly surprising no one has reported.

Chris_Bradley · 28-01-2016 10:16am

"I get a sense of pride and achievement when my boss catches me actually doing work."

:D

snickerpuss · 28-01-2016 7:07pm

"A guy sends you a friend request. You don’t know him, but he’s got a cute profile picture, so you accept his friend request.
It’s your baby girl’s first day of school. She looks SO cute in her new outfit you just have to take a picture and put it on Facebook so all your friends and family can see.
You’re so excited dropping her off that you ‘Check in’ to her school on FB saying
‘I can’t believe how big she’s gotten. Time sure flies. One proud momma/daddy right here’.
Meanwhile, the mystery guy whose friend request you hurriedly accepted earlier this morning is saving that picture you posted of your daughter in her cute new outfit to his phone and texting it to 60 other grown men across the world with the caption –

‘American Female. Age 5.
Brown Hair. Black Eyes.
$5,000-‘.
Not only did you provide a picture of your little girl to a child trafficker, you’ve handed him the name and exact location of her school on a silver cyber platter.
You go to pick her up at 3:00 this afternoon, but she’s nowhere to be found.
Little do you know, your precious baby girl was sold to a 43 years old pedophile before you even stepped foot off campus this morning, and now she’s on her way to South Africa with a bag over her head, confused, terrified and crying because a man she’s never seen before picked her up from school, and now she doesn’t know where her parents are, where she’s going, or what’s gonna happen to her.
STOP ADDING STRANGERS ON FACEBOOK
and
STOP
posting everything about your life on Facebook.
Avoid keeping children’s pictures as profile picture.
Please SHARE it for the sake of all kids and parents."

PopePalpatine · 28-01-2016 7:53pm

I feel I have deja vu reading that.

pc7 · 28-01-2016 8:42pm

Black eyes, someone should report that mother

yellowlabrador · 29-01-2016 12:25am

After 2 years I have found my password for my ipad I feel like I've won the flipping lottery lol. Mercury is going forwards whoop x

some of the comments
Mercury is going forwards helps you find things thats lost? xx

I'd been trying for months to use something then last week I spent 2 and half days 27 passwords to get into something, totally agree xxxxxxxx

That's fate X good times my lovely x

I feel like if won lottery after geting good news from hospital after my wee procdure

snickerpuss · 29-01-2016 8:27pm

pc7 wrote: »

Black eyes, someone should report that mother

Hah! I just want to get me a 'silver cyber platter'.

thesandeman · 29-01-2016 9:07pm

yellowlabrador wrote: »

wee procdure

Sounds painful.

razorblunt · 29-01-2016 9:13pm

[QUOTE=snickerpuss;98533727.
STOP ADDING STRANGERS ON FACEBOOK
and
STOP
posting everything about your life on Facebook.
Avoid keeping children’s pictures as profile picture.
Please SHARE it for the sake of all kids and parents."[/QUOTE]

... and ....

don't swim in the sea.

Valentina · 29-01-2016 9:29pm

Person 1: Oh no not another...

[Link to an article about Joe Cocker passing away]

Comments underneath:

Person 2: I thought he died already
Person 2: He died in 2014
Person 1: Oh **** not again why do they do that ...
Person 3: Omg they are all going xxx rip
Person 2: I'd be deleting this post Lolol
Person 1: Haha alright give a girl a break .... Lol
Person 4: He's bin dead some time.
Person 1: I know ...everyone has told me ...

corner of hells · 30-01-2016 7:16pm

Omg i cannot believe how well my sister kiera looks were in nannys now with her prod is not a ggod enuff word

I'm kind of thinking its a cattle prod , but open to suggestions.