The end of life on earth next September. Are you ready?

TheLastMohican

It's official. End times are here right now. I'm going to start getting my things together. Non believers had better start believing pdq.

http://www.inquisitr.com/2054665/2-5-mile-wide-comet-headed-toward-earth-conspiracy-theorists-spread-doomsday-mass-hysteria/

endacl

Cool! Missed it the last time around!

Pesky Mayans.

:mad:

darkpagandeath

Sooooo, No astronomer as pointed a telescope to look ?

efb

On behalf to of the gay community soz, our bad- according to some "Christian" nut it's our fault- the whole gay marriage thing...

But the fact it's all boll0cks worries me not a jot!

Anyone for an End of World full moon party???

Forgotten password 99

No Christmas .

darkpagandeath

efb wrote: »

On behalf to of the gay community soz, our bad- according to some "Christian" nut it's our fault- the whole gay marriage thing...

But the fact it's all boll0cks worries me not a jot!

Anyone for an End of World full moon party???

Does god only look at what goes on in Ireland :P

Ruu

What if we throw someone/something at the comet and knock it out of the sky/into billions of pieces?

efb

darkpagandeath wrote: »

Does god only look at what goes on in Ireland :P

Apparently??? Well I think we would have been saved! But too late now!

Russia surely should be saved so!

retro:electro

Good. We all go together. Best way to go.

efb

Can we not send up Bruce Willis and Ben Afflick to sort it?

mikom

TheLastMohican wrote: »

It's official. End times are here right now. I'm going to start getting my things together. Non believers had better start believing pdq.

http://www.inquisitr.com/2054665/2-5-mile-wide-comet-headed-toward-earth-conspiracy-theorists-spread-doomsday-mass-hysteria/

Probably organized by the Iona institute and the man upstairs to prevent the gays marrying.

darkpagandeath

Ruu wrote: »

What if we throw someone/something at the comet and knock it out of the sky/into billions of pieces?

I can't help but think some may read that and go yeah it's a good idea :pac:

Knasher

efb wrote: »

On behalf to of the gay community soz, our bad- according to some "Christian" nut it's our fault- the whole gay marriage thing.

Yeah I heard that all right. Ireland was going apparently to be spared any damage if we voted against. I assume he was talking about that time Earth skipped forward a half day so that we are now in direct line to being hit directly by the meteor.

People have been trying to convince me that I simply drank too much and blacked out after the referendum passed, but I know the truth.

ScumLord

Ruu wrote: »

What if we throw someone/something at the comet and knock it out of the sky/into billions of pieces?

It's customary to send at least one nuclear warhead at it.

darkpagandeath

Wonder if all the prepper types have "bugged out" not really thinking through how an extinction level event works.

efb

ScumLord wrote: »

It's customary to send at least one nuclear warhead at it.

Nicola Sturgeon mounts Trident as its blasted into the meteor! Freedom!!!

TheLastMohican

Having a few swift ones after the Creamery this morning, Dan Jimmy Cronin suggested that it was The Illuminati that caused the about turn in the Milk Quota saga. I left shortly after but later on, while passing the same pub, heard the best rendition of De Banks ever.

efb

I don't want to miss a thing!

The_Valeyard

TheLastMohican wrote: »

It's official. End times are here right now. I'm going to start getting my things together. Non believers had better start believing pdq.

http://www.inquisitr.com/2054665/2-5-mile-wide-comet-headed-toward-earth-conspiracy-theorists-spread-doomsday-mass-hysteria/

Been ready since December 21st 2012.....

Elmo

ScumLord wrote: »

It's customary to send at least one nuclear warhead at it.

true but often if fails either

causing mass dispersal of the comet as fragment continue to head to the earth, though in fairness this is great for the amateur photographer.

OR they send in an elite team of ex-cons (no wait mixing up Jerry Bruckhiemer movies)

Either way it can only mean I post this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oR68oAtWY-c

SING IT WITH ME FOLKS

I could stay awake just to HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE YOU BREATHING . ...

waves arms!

Pinch Flat

Ah in fairness they've been right all along. I suspect I'll be doing something mundane like writing a report in work or cutting the grass. Does anyone know if a tin foil hat offers any protection against this?

ScumLord

Elmo wrote: »

true but often if fails either

causing mass dispersal of the comet as fragment continue to head to the earth, though in fairness this is great for the amateur photographer.

OR they send in an elite team of ex-cons (no wait mixing up Jerry Bruckhiemer movies)

I watched a mini series on netflix called Cat8 that takes the whole send a nuke at it to a whole new level of absurdity. It's like they used an American born again Christian as the science adviser for the show.

I just don't see how the Americans will be able to resist sending a nuke at it, so they might as well get it out of the way.

The Diabolical Monocle

efb wrote: »

On behalf to of the gay community soz, our bad- according to some "Christian" nut it's our fault- the whole gay marriage thing...

But the fact it's all boll0cks worries me not a jot!

Anyone for an End of World full moon party???

every nights a full moon party for the gheys.

Ruu

ScumLord wrote: »

It's customary to send at least one nuclear warhead at it.

But what if it doesn't work?!?!:eek::eek:

God save us all....

Elmo

ScumLord wrote: »

I watched a mini series on netflix called Cat8 that takes the whole send a nuke at it to a whole new level of absurdity. It's like they used an American born again Christian as the science adviser for the show.

I just don't see how the Americans will be able to resist sending a nuke at it, so they might as well get it out of the way.

If you are born again in America do you get citizenship?

Russia will launch first, followed by China. America will then attack Russia and China as they have all the neclear war heads, Britain has continued talks with France and Germany questions why they don't have Nuclear weapons in events like these, after all German Engineering is the best

Wir leben Autos
Das Auto

Though to be honest send a VW Golf and a Opel Astra into outer space possible wouldn't work.

TheLastMohican

Ruu wrote: »

But what if it doesn't work?!?!:eek::eek:

God save us all....

It can't work 'cause He's driving the comet. A divine swerve at the last nano-second.

Elmo

TheLastMohican wrote: »

It can't work 'cause He's driving the comet. A divine swerve at the last nano-second.

Followed by "Haha... Just messing with you, Humans haha!"

TheLastMohican

TheLastMohican wrote: »

It can't work 'cause He's driving the comet. A divine swerve at the last nano-second.

Elmo wrote: »

Followed by "Haha... Just messing with you, Humans haha!"

Slight underestimation there Elmo. The swerve was to avoid the missile. Now back on track.

Only thing that can go wrong is pressure pad on God's keyboard to fuck up.

endacl

Ruu wrote: »

What if we throw someone/something at the comet and knock it out of the sky/into billions of pieces?

Who would we throw? Load up a container with Katie Hopkinses?

agent graves

enda kenny should be thrown at it

Big C

shyte, I just booked dignitas for October ?

Can I please have a refund

TheLastMohican

endacl wrote: »

Who would we throw? Load up a container with Katie Hopkinses?

AFAIK, said lady is of the Jewish persuasion.
Perhaps shouldn't have said that, leaves it open to Godwinian troll or oversensitive Mod

efb

The Diabolical Monocle wrote: »

every nights a full moon party for the gheys.

Any excuse

Aongus Von Bismarck

That's a shame. I recently diversified my portfolio by investing in 5y Government bonds.

The Backwards Man

They don't know what date it will impact but they know it will hit Earth? I'm no expert, but wouldn't the Earth be a quite few million miles further from where it was on Sep 15 by Sep 28?

efb

Sepp Blatter and watch Sepp Splatter!

/Gets coat

I Am The Law

TheLastMohican wrote: »

It's official. End times are here right now. I'm going to start getting my things together. Non believers had better start believing pdq.

Getting your things together? Why?

Buzz Meeks

Had we listened to Arthur C Clarke then we would be safe now with various planetary and lunar colonies and wheeled space stations. Losing the Earth would be inconvenient but no biggie.

But here we are having put all our eggs in one basket. And whatever aliens launched this foul weapon at us are laughing all the way to the bank.

The_Valeyard

When time began, moments later, there was some dude convinced it was about to end. His descendents carry on his tradition.

Big C

follow bertie, he always gets out of trouble before the sh** hits the fan

RobertKK

The files at Hangar one claims the US has spacecrafts up there, and will save us from doom.
We can thank those aliens who crashed at Roswell for their technology.

As for that comet, conspiracy theories should be ignored...

housetypeb

After the fall of civilization,with low cunning and ruthless ambition, I fully expect to rise to the top of the remaining plebs and become supreme overlord of a small local town and a few of the better farms in the area.
It's on my bucket list.

darkpagandeath

RobertKK wrote: »

The files at Hangar one claims the US has spacecrafts up there, and will save us from doom.
We can thank those aliens who crashed at Roswell for their technology.

As for that comet, conspiracy theories should be ignored...

Must be great technology up to a point. Being able to chart navigate interstellar space or interdimensional yet unable to fly in an atmosphere without crashing.

cloud493

Ruu wrote: »

What if we throw someone/something at the comet and knock it out of the sky/into billions of pieces?

The rocket foolishly soared too high, and lost control of its its servo guidance mechanism leaving us.... six hours to live.

Pumpkinseeds

efb wrote: »

On behalf to of the gay community soz, our bad- according to some "Christian" nut it's our fault- the whole gay marriage thing...

But the fact it's all boll0cks worries me not a jot!

Anyone for an End of World full moon party???

Ahh Damn it efb.:mad: I was looking forward to seeing some really stylish gay weddings too.

_Whimsical_

If we all go down together then I could handle it. I'm just not going on my own while everyone else hangs around to enjoy the fun.

mrkiscool2

It's alright lads! NASA says we can enjoy all the awesome gay weddings cause there is nothing on collision course with Earth!

NASA knows of no asteroid or comet currently on a collision course with Earth, so the probability of a major collision is quite small.

"In fact, as best as we can tell, no large object is likely to strike the Earth any time in the next several hundred years.

smurgen

mrkiscool2 wrote: »

It's alright lads! NASA says we can enjoy all the awesome gay weddings cause there is nothing on collision course with Earth!

What am I gonna do with all the coke,hookers and heroin I've stockpiled for next September? Egg on my face!

Akrasia

The Backwards Man wrote: »

They don't know what date it will impact but they know it will hit Earth? I'm no expert, but wouldn't the Earth be a quite few million miles further from where it was on Sep 15 by Sep 28?

If I know my Kerbal Space program, the comet will miss earth but fly close enough to do some atmospheric braking slowing it down enough to get captured in the earths gravity well, pass by earth to an enormous sigh of relief only for it to fall back down crushing all the godless heathens but not any churches.

Akrasia

mrkiscool2 wrote: »

It's alright lads! NASA says we can enjoy all the awesome gay weddings cause there is nothing on collision course with Earth!

They would say that though wouldn't they, to protect their precious funding, cause we all know that the instant we all find out that there's gonna be an astroid impact, the first thing the U.S. government will do is cut the space program.

mrkiscool2

Akrasia wrote: »

They would say that though wouldn't they, to protect their precious funding, cause we all know that the instant we all find out that there's gonna be an astroid impact, the first thing the U.S. government will do is cut the space program.

I do hope that is a joke! If not then wow, you clearly don't know about all the other stuff NASA is doing (including an asteroid defence plan)