she needs space and time!!

mike hilux

Hello, im just looking for opinions.

So I met this girl online and we really seemed to hit it off, we were going out for 3 weeks and had 4 dates along with texting and the usual carry on.

Now on her online profile she stated she was looking for a relationship and also it was her that first sent me a message.Last week she told me she was only single a couple of months and had decided she wanted to take a step back from the whole dating scene

She said it was too soon for her to get into anything serious but in a couple of months she could feel differently. I told her I understand and if she wanted to, then give me a shout in a month or so!!

Her reply was that she hasn't met anyone else and she really enjoyed our time together, that I was "genuinely great" and that she would like to "touch base" in a month but that she was going back on the dating site for a bit of banter but that's all.

My question is, does it sound like she was just trying to let me down easy or not?? Because I can move on if needs be and although it is very early days I do like her but I feel like im in limbo with her. I don't want to contact her as I said I'd give her the space she wanted!!

Maybe im odd or old fashioned or something but even on the dating site, if im getting on well with one girl then I don't like being in contact with another as I prefer to give my full attention to just one person. I don't expect that from anyone else though but it's just the way I do it.

Should I just move on and forget about this girl and if I hear from her again then well and good if the situation allows or contact her and get to the bottom of whatshe is thinking or just stay in limbo for the month and see what comes of it??

I know im only a fool when it comes to women and affairs of the heart so don't chastise me too much please if you can at all, thank you.

All advice is welcome, sincerely, Mike.

PirateShampoo

Forget her and move along, she sounds like she's not into you and the fact she says she hasn't meet someone else means she probably has.

Online dating can be a wasteland of broken hearts if you take it to serious

LegacyUser

She is not into you if she's willing to mess you about and risk it ending. It'll sting a little, but you can keep reminding yourself that you're better of without someone who has already wrecked your head in just three weeks.

OneOfThem

She's not going on the dating site for "a bit of banter" she's going on it to meet, date, and sleep with guys. She wants to enjoy being single and casually dating for a while. For now, do the same, move on, meet other people,as that's what she will be doing.

gigglemuch82

I'm sorry but she's just not that into you. That's all - not your fault. You will meet someone better - move on and forget about her.

mike hilux

OneOfThem wrote: »

She's not going on the dating site for "a bit of banter" she's going on it to meet, date, and sleep with guys. She wants to enjoy being single and casually dating for a while. For now, do the same, move on, meet other people,as that's what she will be doing.

Hello again. Thank you for the replies and I agree with the running line of thought alright.

As for being on it for the banter, well I justwanted to say that they were her words and not mine and I basically thought the same thing.

I suppose I just wanted someone else's opinion so I didn't feel I was jumping the gun and not giving her the benefit of the doubt!!

LegacyUser

Hey, just came across this thread. It's quite possible that what everybody has said so far is right. But a similar thing happened to me. All going great and suddenly she said 'no sorry, it's too soon'. I just said that's a pity and after a few days of licking my wounds I moved on and forgot about her. Met her about 6 months later and she couldn't have been more keen. We went out a few times and I asked her about what happened before and she seemed shocked that I thought that she was lying and that it was just genuinely too soon. It didn't work out as it happens but sometimes girls are telling the truth when they say this.

HardenendMan

Yep she just isn't mad into you. Not your fault nor a reflection on you at all.

A rule of thumb - men and women never need "time to think things over" if they find the right one. But she understandably letting you gently. Sure would be rude otherwise.

skallywag

Sounds to me that she is giving you the brush off Mike. Some people find it quite difficult to be straight up about such things and prefer to go down the easier road for themselves of sugar coating it. While it's fine for them it can leave the other party in limbo, exactly as you are describing.

I would definitely move on and delete her profile etc. You sound like a decent chap and I am quite sure that your time will come before long. Good luck!