Child Access Fathers experience

Joshua5

Hi folks,

I put in fathers experience just because it's generally the father looking for access as mothers generally live with the children but it's open to both sides.

I'm wondering can someone give me their experience on going to court for access and how the judge generally decides, what they ask for?

I'm in court tomorrow requesting access, for some reason I can't get to speak to my solicitor until the day and it's on my mind.

Basically the short story is I've three children, we are still legally married although separated around 4-5 years ago. I've always had access, there's never been a problem. But there is now, she refuses access and I haven't seen my kids in a few weeks or even got to speak to them.

I've had them every single weekend without fail, when I applied for access through the courts because she was refusing to speak or let me see them she turned it up a notch.

Will the judge ask her why she is suddenly stopping access? Will he likely grant the access that was always in place? I've asked her for mediation, and also to join me on a co-parenting course. She's not interested.

This has all kicked off because my current partner is now pregnant to be blunt.

superstepmom2b

Joshua5 wrote: »

Hi folks,

I put in fathers experience just because it's generally the father looking for access as mothers generally live with the children but it's open to both sides.

I'm wondering can someone give me their experience on going to court for access and how the judge generally decides, what they ask for?

I'm in court tomorrow requesting access, for some reason I can't get to speak to my solicitor until the day and it's on my mind.

Basically the short story is I've three children, we are still legally married although separated around 4-5 years ago. I've always had access, there's never been a problem. But there is now, she refuses access and I haven't seen my kids in a few weeks or even got to speak to them.

I've had them every single weekend without fail, when I applied for access through the courts because she was refusing to speak or let me see them she turned it up a notch.

Will the judge ask her why she is suddenly stopping access? Will he likely grant the access that was always in place? I've asked her for mediation, and also to join me on a co-parenting course. She's not interested.

This has all kicked off because my current partner is now pregnant to be blunt.

Congratulations on your new arrival

I'm not a father...but my partner has constantly had issues with access. The new children's bill that was brought in enshrines the right of the child to access and a relationship with both parents. Neither parent has the right to deny this access.

Assuming she has a solicitor present? Her solicitor will speak on her behalf. If you have brought the case forward your solicitor will outline your case. It's important they highlight there has been no issue with access until x date and that the access was x. And that the access ceased when she was informed that you and your partner are expecting a baby. That you have sought to attend co parenting and to mediate getting access reinstated as at this stage you have not had access or communication with your children since x and this is not what they are used to and it is both distressing for you as their father and for the children. They will have a new sibling soon and it is important they have time with you and your partner before this to adjust to the new family dynamics and to feel part of this new family. What the mother is doing is risking your children feeling unwanted and alienated. That they and your soon to be born child have a right to a relationship with one another and that you want the access reinstated. You should also seek that when the child is born you ate given access or permission to bring them.to the hospital to.meet their new sibling as it's important they are included in all of these key things.

Best of luck.tomorrow hope it goes your way. Just remember to not make it personal if queried this is primarily about them.

Joshua5

superstepmom2b wrote: »

Congratulations on your new arrival

I'm not a father...but my partner has constantly had issues with access. The new children's bill that was brought in enshrines the right of the child to access and a relationship with both parents. Neither parent has the right to deny this access.

Assuming she has a solicitor present? Her solicitor will speak on her behalf. If you have brought the case forward your solicitor will outline your case. It's important they highlight there has been no issue with access until x date and that the access was x. And that the access ceased when she was informed that you and your partner are expecting a baby. That you have sought to attend co parenting and to mediate getting access reinstated as at this stage you have not had access or communication with your children since x and this is not what they are used to and it is both distressing for you as their father and for the children. They will have a new sibling soon and it is important they have time with you and your partner before this to adjust to the new family dynamics and to feel part of this new family. What the mother is doing is risking your children feeling unwanted and alienated. That they and your soon to be born child have a right to a relationship with one another and that you want the access reinstated. You should also seek that when the child is born you ate given access or permission to bring them.to the hospital to.meet their new sibling as it's important they are included in all of these key things.

Best of luck.tomorrow hope it goes your way. Just remember to not make it personal if queried this is primarily about them.

Thanks, I'm just really concerned about it. She went mad when she found out about the new baby. She even took a safety order against me and it was granted, I didn't have a solicitor and was a soft target but it's in appeal.

She them invited me to collect the kids and claimed fear which resulted in me being arrested which is also tomorrow.

I didn't breach the order, in fact it should have never been there but I asked the judge to bring the date forward for this breach as id like to manage the access and this accusation in one go.

Having them hanging over me is a killer, not seeing my kids is very upsetting too.

Now I'm having second thoughts that I shouldn't have asked to bring the safety order breach forward. I'm completely not guilty, I didn't do anything but I'm worried the judge might look at this unfavourably.

January

You already have a thread in Legal Discussion about your experience so I'm closing this one, one of the rules of boards.ie is that you don't post the same question over multiple forums.