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Temporary flatmate, renting and social welfare (thread split)

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  • 20-07-2015 12:16pm
    #1
    mickells35
    Registered Users Posts: 23 ✭


    Hi,
    I'm coming at this from the other perspective. A girl I know from years ago moved into my spare room two weeks ago and has declared that she is going to apply for social welfare. She is going to use my address. I am not comfortable with this as it was only meant to be a temporary arrangement until she got on her feet. I am on a FAS/ETB training course and I also get rent allowance. So far she has given me €30 per week towards the upkeep of the apartment.
    If she signs on for SW will I be receiving calls from them that could potentially affect any benefits I am receiving. I dont own the apartment and my lease is up in January at which point I will be leaving. I am not going to sign anything re proof of address etc...she is urging me to provide a utility bill with my name and a note saying she is living here temporarily and paying me nothing. I do not think this will work?
    Does anyone have any idea's? I would prefer if she just left at this stage as she drinks a lot and smokes a lot in my apartment.


Comments

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    #2
    athtrasna
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,420 ✭✭✭✭athtrasna


    Ask her to move out? Tell her your landlord has heard and isn't happy?


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    #3
    mickells35
    Registered Users Posts: 23 ✭mickells35


    @athtrasna
    Yes..it seems like the simplest solution but the landlord might have a go at me if he found out that I had let someone stay in the first place. I am actually going to tell her that I am not comfortable signing anything re Social Welfare and that she can't stay. If she has any objections to that , I'll let her know that i'm not happy about the drinking and smoking either.


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    #4
    tradhead
    Registered Users Posts: 369 ✭✭tradhead


    mickells35 wrote: »
    Hi,
    I'm coming at this from the other perspective. A girl I know from years ago moved into my spare room two weeks ago and has declared that she is going to apply for social welfare. She is going to use my address. I am not comfortable with this as it was only meant to be a temporary arrangement until she got on her feet. I am on a FAS/ETB training course and I also get rent allowance. So far she has given me €30 per week towards the upkeep of the apartment.
    If she signs on for SW will I be receiving calls from them that could potentially affect any benefits I am receiving. I dont own the apartment and my lease is up in January at which point I will be leaving. I am not going to sign anything re proof of address etc...she is urging me to provide a utility bill with my name and a note saying she is living here temporarily and paying me nothing. I do not think this will work?
    Does anyone have any idea's? I would prefer if she just left at this stage as she drinks a lot and smokes a lot in my apartment.

    €30 a week is simply not enough for her to be staying there, especially if she is inconveniencing you with drinking, smoking, etc.

    I would be telling her that it was only to be a temporary arrangement so she absolutely cannot use your address, and she needs to find somewhere else to stay as your landlord will not allow her to stay any longer.


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    #5
    mickells35
    Registered Users Posts: 23 ✭mickells35


    Thanks...an abrupt conversation this evening.


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    #6
    April 73
    Registered Users Posts: 846 ✭✭✭April 73


    It's a business arrangement between two adults. Ask her to sit down & say you have a few issues you'd like to iron out as you like living in the house, but feel there are a couple of things to be discussed.
    Put a cleaning rota in place, ask to see the bills as you need to understand how they are being worked out, tell her that her dealings with SW are her concern not yours. Discuss using each other's things & food & agree not to do it.
    In short get your courage up & have the discussion. How do you deal with any potential stress or conflict in your personal or work life unless you are pro-active about it?
    There will always be niggles in house-shares. These sound like minor ones which could be dealt with if you speak up for yourself.


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    #7
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    April 73 wrote: »
    It's a business arrangement between two adults. Ask her to sit down & say you have a few issues you'd like to iron out as you like living in the house, but feel there are a couple of things to be discussed.
    Put a cleaning rota in place, ask to see the bills as you need to understand how they are being worked out, tell her that her dealings with SW are her concern not yours. Discuss using each other's things & food & agree not to do it.
    In short get your courage up & have the discussion. How do you deal with any potential stress or conflict in your personal or work life unless you are pro-active about it?
    There will always be niggles in house-shares. These sound like minor ones which could be dealt with if you speak up for yourself.

    If you have decided that the best thing is that she move out, then take that position and stick to it. If you shift position to "yes, you can stay but you must do cleaning etc," then you are lost... you will have given her grace to stay weeks or months more and you will still have a difficult conversation before you.


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    #8
    athtrasna
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,420 ✭✭✭✭athtrasna


    Deleted User wrote: »
    If you have decided that the best thing is that she move out, then take that position and stick to it. If you shift position to "yes, you can stay but you must do cleaning etc," then you are lost... you will have given her grace to stay weeks or months more and you will still have a difficult conversation before you.

    I think April 73 was replying to the OP ;)

    Mickells35 please do not hijack other threads, separate issue separate thread thanks.

    Mod


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    #9
    Victor
    Registered Users Posts: 78,423 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Thread split.

    Do not raise moderation on-thread. If you need to, send a private message to the moderators.

    Moderator


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    #10
    Wabbit Ears
    Registered Users Posts: 3,043 ✭✭✭Wabbit Ears


    some people just suck the good out of you, always wanting more more more. More help, more handouts, more sympathy, more more more.

    Giving someone a room really is enough. TBH Id just burn that bridge and cut your losses. Tell her to GTFO as, in these situations, people dont change and things dont improve, they just get worse. Really, you benefit absolutely nothing from all this, its all lose for you and all gain for her.


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    #11
    the_syco
    Registered Users Posts: 37,301 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    mickells35 wrote: »
    She is going to use my address. I am not comfortable with this as it was only meant to be a temporary arrangement until she got on her feet.
    Nope. Once you sign the forms, she'll have no reason to leave.
    mickells35 wrote: »
    ]I would prefer if she just left at this stage as she drinks a lot and smokes a lot in my apartment.
    If you're in a non-smoking apartment, you can kiss your deposit goodbye. Sounds like she will just eff off, and leave you hanging.

    She sounds like an annoying **** that needs to be shown the door. Don't give her an inch, as she's already taken a mile. Lock up your valuables (at friends, if possible), and tell her she has to be gone by Sunday.

    Once she's gone, air the place out, and Frebreeze the place out. You can get anti-smoke-smell plug devices.


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