Being in the now

galljga1

sup_dude wrote: »

Sorry! There's just a very long history on boards of when I or someone else says that they've overcome depression in some way, there's a backlash and I guess that's immediately what I was expecting.

No worries dude. I dont suffer from it myself apart from self inflicted post booze blues but my brother did so I am pretty aware of it. Anyone who overcomes it through whatever means: well done.

Mod

Re reg troll banned, troll posts and those related have been deleted.

Wright

Mr_Spaceman wrote: »

Yesterday is history,
Tomorrow is a mystery,
Today is a gift,
That's why it's called the present

Thank you, turtle from Kung Fu Panda.

JupiterKid

I am trying to live in the now today. It's not easy, but the journey should be at least as interesting as the destination.

Pumpkin PJs Fan No.9

NachoBusiness wrote: »

I went to those Tony Quinn classes many many moons ago, when I was around 21, long before he was selling supplements or owned the Educo Gyms. They were held in that pointing wizard hat shaped building on the coast road to Portmarnock. There was about 50 people per class and there was four or five a day. He must have been minting it.

Anyway, he had these mantras like: ''Believe you have what you want without inner doubt and it will come about".I'm not kidding, there were people there having epileptic fits during these "relaxation classes". People with inoperable cancers. You name it, I seen sufferers of it attend those classes in the hope of getting well / staying alive. All told, I attended them for around an eighteen month or so period. Lots of people there did say they were getting well, has to be said but many also just stopped coming to them, although I tried not to think about why that might have been.

I was reading Tony Robbins stuff back then also. Awaken The Giant Within and both seemed of the same school of thought: 'You can pretty much heal anything if you stop wasting energy with negative thinking', but I eventually had an argument of sorts with one of the staff there as I wasn't getting well, I was getting sicker and the 'live in the now' crap was starting to bug me and many others. Quinn starting pimping supplements to us around this time also and in front of around 75 or so regulars I said: "Last year you told us that we could get well from anything by being in the now" and the person said "Yes, that's right" and so I said "Well, then why do we need to suddenly take these new line of supplements? " They looked furious and a few people came up to me afterwards and thanked me for saying what I did. I never went back.

Tony Robbins, the infomercial guru, has also started selling supplements now. I really think these people do more harm that good. Steven Collins the boxer started to use Quinn's "techniques" around that time also, and honestly believed that he was instrumental in his winning the world title at the time, he doesn't any more however. Eubank was very nervous about fighting Collins at time as he believed that Collins was hypnotized and that he might not be able to feel pain or know when to stop. A lot of it was for show of course, and Collins I think felt that he was just using Quinn to make Eubank nervous, but ultimately I think Collins was the one be used, as Quinn's association with Collins is ultimately what made him the multimillionaire that he is today.

Course, the world was obsessed with that crap back in the early to late 90s. Fecking Oprah Winfrey was leading the way with it all stateside. She had that total wanker Dr. John Gray (Dr my arse) on almost every God damn day talking about "Earth Schools" and how people are here to learn lessons. If he wasn't on she would have that other twat Deepak Chopra on, waffling about life lessons and how you draw your experiences upon you and how your tragedies are here to teach you about yourself. All told, I think people, especially young folk, are better off today if they are having it tough as there was so many leaches around back then to exploit such people and yes I know they are still around, but I don't think they are given as much credence as they once were (thank fcuk).

Seriously, that whole story sounds like a religion No.9 was brought up with - think: super-churches deep in the heart of Texas - Yeah, those crazy cats and kittens.

Seems like you learned a valuable life lesson though.

And Chris Eubank always makes a Pumpkin Laugh - the Man has style!

_______________

"I'm an awesome ****ing Pumpkin!!"

lazybones32

Wright wrote: »

Thank you, turtle from Kung Fu Panda.

And some TD or Senator quoted it not long afterwards in one of the houses. The plagiarizing boll0cks didn't even reference the quote...

Drumpot

I have had to work hard to learn to live in the now. Some people have posted the kind of naieve, ignorant waffle about living in the know that I would of posted as a cynical , lazy non believer.

Life is full of distractions and most people don't actually understand what it is to live in the now. I have to disclose that I am only scratching the surface so don't pretend to have all the answers , nor do I preach from an ivory tower.

Living in the now may come easy and natural to some people but to many ,like it was for me , it's an alien concept that may sound a bit airy fairy.

Look up the 10 regrets people say on your deathbed and ask yourself if you think you would have those regrets if you were given 24 hours to live.

My biggest mistake with meditation was expecting certain results and giving up when I didn't get what I wanted. I dismissed the concept of spirituality because the Catholic Church has given many people an excuse to dismiss it. I am trying to get spiritual because I feel more in tune with my world and my inner self. This takes time and a willingness.

I don't do this all on my own, with professional help and support groups helping me do it right. The big thing for many people is that they just don't really want to put in any effort, work or resources into it. The zanex generation want instant results. I'm glad I got out of that bracket and learned to work hard on mindfulness. It's a shame that many won't learn this gift and the gift of what is truely important in life, before it's too late.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

"What day is it?"
It's today," squeaked Piglet.
My favorite day," said Pooh.”

Irish Guitarist

Take a walk in the pissing rain and your only concern will be that you're getting wet.

Pumpkin PJs Fan No.9

Drumpot wrote: »

I have had to work hard to learn to live in the now. Some people have posted the kind of naieve, ignorant waffle about living in the know that I would of posted as a cynical , lazy non believer.

Life is full of distractions and most people don't actually understand what it is to live in the now. I have to disclose that I am only scratching the surface so don't pretend to have all the answers , nor do I preach from an ivory tower.

Living in the now may come easy and natural to some people but to many ,like it was for me , it's an alien concept that may sound a bit airy fairy.

Look up the 10 regrets people say on your deathbed and ask yourself if you think you would have those regrets if you were given 24 hours to live.

My biggest mistake with meditation was expecting certain results and giving up when I didn't get what I wanted. I dismissed the concept of spirituality because the Catholic Church has given many people an excuse to dismiss it. I am trying to get spiritual because I feel more in tune with my world and my inner self. This takes time and a willingness.

I don't do this all on my own, with professional help and support groups helping me do it right. The big thing for many people is that they just don't really want to put in any effort, work or resources into it. The zanex generation want instant results. I'm glad I got out of that bracket and learned to work hard on mindfulness. It's a shame that many won't learn this gift and the gift of what is truely important in life, before it's too late.

Actually don't understand what any of this is about, like, at all... some Buddha ****?

______________

"Yes... (you know by now but it has t be done) Still An Awesome ****ing Pumpkin!"

Call Me Jimmy

Oh great yea let's bash the buddha why don't we

ToddyDoody

Living in the now can be a bit stupido tho, I find. A bit like unbalancing a boat then running side to side to keep it balanced when you could just balance your weight in the centre.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Living in the now can be a bit stupido tho, I find. A bit like unbalancing a boat then running side to side to keep it balanced when you could just balance your weight in the centre.

OK

Pumpkin PJs Fan No.9

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Oh great yea let's bash the buddha why don't we

Well, why not? Why should he be held in any higher esteem than any other historical or mythological figure?

A lot of **** taught in Buddhism too.

Here is a book about the sound of one hand clapping, now go far the **** away, and read it over and over and over again then come back and tell me how enlightened you feel!

___________

"An Awesome Pumpkin!!"

Aineoil

Wibbs wrote: »

Eh yes you can. We do it all the time. This idea that somehow the mind is this separate uncontrollable wild horse that we're strapped to is IMH the cause of a lot of needless suffering. Every time you learn something new you're controlling your mind, every new habit you make, you're controlling your mind. You can make new better habits. It takes work of course and that seems to be the stumbling block for many. They want the easy fix.

Wibbs, thanks for that post.

I suffer from panic attacks and it has taken me time to learn how to control
what are my irrational fears - though when you're having an attack they are far from irrational - and yes they cause needless suffering, both for me and my family.

You are right, you can make new better habits and it does take work and a lot of courage too. Again as you say there's no easy fix. I don't have the right words to express it...but every day when I wake up I say to myself, "Yes you can do it".

So to answer the op's question, I try as hard as I can to live in the present. There's nothing I can do about the past, it's gone. I do have certain regrets but that's just dragging the past into the present. Mistakes I have made in the past hopefully will make my future a better place to be in because I will have learned from the past.

The future? Of course I worry about it but I only have a certain amount of control over that. So when my mind is racing about what may or may not happen I just have to drag myself into the present again because nobody knows what the next day will bring.

ToddyDoody

Milena Millions Rubber-stamp wrote: »

OK

Yay, I've created a riddle

Maximus Alexander

eternal wrote: »

What are you supposed to do, not think?

Isn't that what 'mindfullness' is?

Which makes the name pretty stupid really.

r93kaey5p2izun

Sometimes the now is pretty sh1t place to be. I have wasted a lot of time hoping and dreaming for a better future where certain issues may be resolved or improved. But that doesn't help you achieve any improvements in the now. I have also spent a lot of time actively seeking to improve the situation and looking to resolve current difficulties. But that has not worked either. I think it was easier to live with the vague hope of things improving than with the knowledge that recommended courses of action have achieved nothing. The now is not always easy to live with.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Yay, I've created a riddle

But it's long forgotten, as that was yesterday. Today is a fresh riddle.

Maximus Alexander

Maximus Alexander wrote: »

Isn't that what 'mindfullness' is?

Certainly not no - but it is the single most prevalent misconception about the practice. Nothing in mindfulness meditation is about not thinking. Quite the opposite.

In MM we do not stop thoughts so much as overcoming preoccupation and obsession with them. Rather than being a slave to any neurotic notion that comes careening into consciousness you become an observer of those thoughts - notice them - and let them continue on their way.

It is essentially a training of ones moment to moment awareness - a goal-less present moment awareness and the practice can include any thought - emotion - or experience that emerges. In fact the idea the goal is to quiet and stop the mind - which it is not - is one of the top reasons newcomers are discouraged from the practice because they feel they are failing at it.

RaRaRasputin

Deleted User wrote: »

Sounds like you have been bitten by the bug. There has been a few posters lately espousing this stuff. And I have been one of them in a small way which sparked one regular user to think I was a sock puppet

I was first confused by the sock puppet phrse but when I read the whole post (which was interesting in its own way actually) it became clear to me that you must be talking about a **** sock

Fleawuss

Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday and all is well.
Someone said sometime.


I'll get my coat. Again.

take everything

Central to this is attention.
What one chooses to attend to.
Attending to thoughts about the future? About the past? Or attending to perception of what's happening right now. Anyone can choose any of these. It's basic logic.
You can dial down the needless thinking about future and past and instead choose to tune into current experience which although not immediately obvious at first allows greater space for creativity etc. What's good about this is it is logical and reality based (what's more real than the present moment).

4068ac1elhodqr

Central to the concept of being 'in the now' is the primary purveyor of general 'nowness':

Eckhart Tolle, and his book 'The Power of Now' (A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment).
Ironically a very dry read and the audio book version - takes up about 20hrs of your time.

This and 'mindfulness' (closely related) is a recent marketing term for what's been around for millennia, i.e. meditation (and it's variants).

The success of meditation is simply to relax the body and slow brain wave activity to alpha/theta rates,
whereby the brain operates in a more effective and cross-hemispherical way. The body also naturally benefits from relaxation
and in particular deeper, slower oxygenated breathing. Possibly positive effects are also to be had on meridians/chakras etc.

All very straightforward, natural, elaborate stuff really.

Wright

lazybones32 wrote: »

And some TD or Senator quoted it not long afterwards in one of the houses. The plagiarizing boll0cks didn't even reference the quote...

Dreamworks' lawyers hanging in the rafters waiting to swoop down as we speak no doubt, don't worry.

Aongus Von Bismarck

One of the core tenets of mindfulness is being in the now. Many people assume it's about not thinking, but that isn't the case. It's about observing how you feel both physically and emotionally in the current moment. You can then choose to either explore the emotion you are feeling, or to let it float away like a wispy cloud.

I incorporate at least 20 minutes of mindfulness into my day; 10 minutes in the morning, and 10 minutes in the evening. If I've had a stressful day at work, then I might practice for 30-40 minutes in the evening - a body scan, loving kindness meditation, exploring difficult emotions meditation.

I find the 10 minutes in the morning to be hugely beneficial to my day. I can put the best foot forward from the outset.

Mindfulness costs nothing, requires no equipment, and is available to you whenever you need it. I'm a big fan.

J Mysterio

most people who talk about being into 'mindfulness' are generally massive assholes.

Mod: Banned

Aongus Von Bismarck

J Mysterio wrote: »

most people who talk about being into 'mindfulness' are generally massive assholes.

Mod: Banned

I couldn't disagree more. I attended a three day mindfulness retreat in Mayo when I was last back in Ireland. It was a silent retreat, so there was no talking, but the feelings of compassion, friendship and mutual understanding in the place was quite humbling.

Reiver

I think whenever I drink I most definitely live for the now. It's like I'm detached from my actions and watch the suave, smooth, scintillating me get to work, I go to bed with my mind easy knowing the other side of my mind is in charge.

4068ac1elhodqr

The issue with the term 'mindfulness' is that it's exactly the same as 'meditation' and that's what it should really be called.
It's not some brand new revolutionary psycho-reorientation practice or newly discovered mental programming technology.

ronan45

Find myself every day being dragged back mainly to old friendships.... that are gone... the lads for the pints.... im not sure when everone moved on but i aint seem them in years lol

JupiterKid

Do you live in the now? Do you savour every moment of your life or do find
yourself dwelling in the past or projecting into the future?

Have you heard of the concept of mindfulness? Current thinking in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is to encourage people to be in the present moment and to avoid thinking too much about the past or worrying about the future.

So - do you live in the "now?"

Eugene Norman

I tried living in the now a few years ago until I was evicted.

AnonoBoy

I lived in the Neale in county Mayo for a while.

OneOfThem

Trying to live in the now is the same trap as living for the future or thinking of the past. It kind of misses the point. Too much trying.

"Life's about more than having fun, you know" - Never a greater load of sh1te ever spoken. "Back in the box you go!"

mattP

You need a balance of all three.
Last year in 4th year I lived in the now and got in a heap of trouble, bimonthly
Now im preoccupied with the future, I work 16 hours a week aswell as school and I never go out

I must dwell on the past because my first reaction was that we had this almost exact thread not too many months ago

But yes I am a practitioner and "teacher" of a sort of mindfulness. Though I use teacher in the loosest sense. I put up a few notices in the local college for anyone who wanted any guidance or just group stuff on this kind of thing. Which I happily give - though I do not like to see myself as teaching it.

Heartily recommend it.

DivingDuck

JupiterKid wrote: »

Current thinking in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is to encourage people to be in the present moment and to avoid thinking too much about the past or worrying about the future.

This seems like madness to me. If you don't worry/plan for the future, how to you expect to make it not crap?

Often you have to do things in the present that are drudgery, and aren't worth being "present" for, but you still have to do them in order to have a more enjoyable future. I think a bit of daydreaming while you're doing it is a good thing.

An obsessive focus on the present seems too much like hedonism to me, which is rarely a recipe for long-term happiness.

wil

I prefer to live in the wow.

Now wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Live in the be here now.

DivingDuck

DivingDuck wrote: »

This seems like madness to me. If you don't worry/plan for the future, how to you expect to make it not crap?

I think in his defense - though this will sound like an insult - he just sucks at explaining it. Mindfulness is not at all about lacking concern for the future. Rather it is about training yourself to not let your immediate reactions in any given present moment hinge too heavily on it - or on obsessing over past failures or successions.

Any impression you may get that mindfulness is about ignoring or not caring for the future is a false one. It is quite the opposite. It is about training yourself to let your future goals guide you - but not overpower or overly influence you in the moment.

DivingDuck

Deleted User wrote: »

I think in his defense - though this will sound like an insult - he just sucks at explaining it. Mindfulness is not at all about lacking concern for the future. Rather it is about training yourself to not let your immediate reactions in any given present moment hinge too heavily on it - or on obsessing over past failures or successions.

Any impression you may get that mindfulness is about ignoring or not caring for the future is a false one. It is quite the opposite. It is about training yourself to let your future goals guide you - but not overpower or overly influence you in the moment.

Still don't think it's for me --I'm the obsessive sort, and quite happy with that-- but that explains far better as to how it might be beneficial.

AnonoBoy

Living in the now isn't half as much fun as living in the why like toddlers do.

josephryan1989

Sounds like psychopathic behavior to me.

If you don't have shame or guilt or regrets or excruciating embarrassment about negative events in the past how will you avoid the same misbehavior or mistakes in the present or the future? Our memory of the past allows us to live in the present and to plan ahead into the future. If we don't worry about the past, how will we appreciate the present as positive and avoid it becoming negative?
If our future projections don't come true how will we be able to look back and find out where we went wrong if we avoid thinking about it?

Psychopaths are not troubled by the past present or future and live in the moment without thought for the consequences of their actions or the consequences for people around them.

Actually duck being obsessive can be more beneficial than you might expect for things like mindfulness

To joseph - I would give the same answer to you as I did to Duck. It is _not_ about learning nothing from the past - or not having concern for the future. At all. The OP just sucks at explaining it I think - or is new to it and excited by it but not quite yet able to wax lyrical about it

Nothing about mindfulness is about letting go of concerns for - or from - the past or the future. It is solely about observing the current moment for what it is - without letting what came before - or what may come after - overly influence you or distract you.

I just watched "the Martian" in one of my very rare visits to the cinema. And it is a very good example of this. The main character could have gotten bogged down in "what ifs" and "maybes" from the future. And he could have bogged himself down in recriminations from the past - how he got stuck where he was stuck or who was to blame.

Instead he set a goal (so see, you do worry about the future) but rather than getting too bogged down in that goal he broke it down to the immediate moment. What can he do right here and right now to take a step towards where he wanted to be.

And that is part of what mindfullness is.

The OTHER part of what mindfulness is is not missing the moment you are in while you are in it. Think of a person late for his bus - walking along at speed - cuts through the park to get there quicker - thinking "What time is it now - am I going to make the bus - Id I do what time will I get to work - if I miss it what do I do next - and when I get there what work do I have to do - - - - "

He completely misses the moment he is in. He walks through the park without seeing it. He could get to the bus stop - regardless of whether he does so in time or not - and still notice his journey. The squirrels he might see. The beauty of the trees in the world he lives in but misses every day because he is focused on his ritual. The whole works.

And you can apply that to any aspect of life. I have caught myself at it many times - rushing my daughter through her dressing in the morning - and getting impatient when she tries to do something herself and it takes longer than I want it to take. Missing those little moments of beauty of her trying to make her own way in the world - to get something right that she could not do before - and even how beautiful and fragile her little failed attempts can be.

So yeah if anyone like the OP or anyone else gives you the impression that "living in the moment" means giving up all care for the past or future - then they have messed it up. We learn from the past - and we have our goals for the future - and all mindfulness is - is letting those things guide the present moment - but never to rule it.

Reiver

Living in the now has always ended upw ith me disappearing somewhere for several days on a binge, bringing only my wallet with me. Never ends well. Not for the bank account anyways

HugsiePie

HugsiePie wrote: »

I thinl you have too much time to think, asking questions like this, I live in the now alright; gotta clean those cups, gotta walk to college, gotta feed the cat

Real living in the moment right there

and what is your mind doing while you engage with these activities?

ballyharpat

Accept the past, live in the present, and prepare for the future……..I find it hard to believe that people cannot understand what living in the now means and how it can improve one's life, I am hoping that most of the replies on here are trolling…….

http://www.online-literature.com/tolstoy/2736/

ballyharpat

ballyharpat wrote: »

Accept the past, live in the present, and prepare for the future……..I find it hard to believe that people cannot understand what living in the now means and how it can improve one's life, I am hoping that most of the replies on here are trolling…….

There is a risk of hubris when one gets something right that one suspects others are getting wrong I do not find it that hard to believe at all. We appear to be naturally disposed to get it "wrong" in many ways too.

NachoBusiness

I once decided, you know what.. from now on I am not going to worry about things so much. Tbh, I was actually making myself ill with worry at times and so one week I just decided from that point on I'm gonna live each day like it's my last, as sure one day you'll be right, right?

Yeah well, it didn't work out to good as I ended up getting evicted for not paying my rent. But sure I wasn't thinking. Figured it's my last week on Earth, what do I need with a house.