Pocket money

freshpopcorn

_Tyrrell_ wrote: »

Because she's a fully grown adult who's more than capable of making a living for herself and doesn't need handouts and to live in the lap of luxury from mammy and daddy?

It's the parents money tough. They can do what ever they want with it.

Lia_lia

My Mother doesn't give me any money because she doesn't really have any money. She hasn't really given me any money since I was about 17. These days I earn about double what she does, so I give her money.

I used to always be annoyed at my friends getting money from their parents. Kind of shocked me really as I would never dream of asking for money from my parents once I earn it myself, even just from a part time job while in college. But most of my friend's parents are loaded so they can afford it, think I was always just a bit jealous really!

John_Rambo

Ridge Fierce Roofing wrote: »

I don't think pocket money is the right way of putting it anyway if parents give you money to help you out. I don't get regular money but I know if I was/am ever stuck for money they will help me instantly.

Agreed. If I lost my job or got sick they'd do their best to help. I'd accept it gratefully and do my best to pay them back when I'm back on my feet.

Ridge Fierce Roofing wrote: »

Also my parents would never allow us (me or my siblings) to pay for meals, drinks etc if we are out or pay for accommodation if we were away together.

Ok, maybe the odd meal. I'd be inclined to get them back, return the favour. Regarding the accommodation, I'd be of the habit of paying for myself. My folks are retired. I'd bring them out for food more times than they'd bring me out.

Ridge Fierce Roofing wrote: »

Also they would do stuff like go up and pay for clothes if I was out shopping and they were there or arrive home with random presents etc (often clothes).

I dress myself. My wife wouldn't even buy clothes for me, my parents haven't brought clothes for me since I was seventeen. I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm an adult. I'd be fairly miffed if I chose a suit and my ma went to pay. That's weird.

Every family has different dynamics. Nox, you help out in the family farm and you're folks probably get pleasure indulging you after you're hard work on the farm. It's their way of paying you for hard graft. Fair play to you, you live miles away, you have a regular job and you probably do the stuff they find difficult to do. And... if your folks have a few quid, where better to send it than your kids. I'd do the same. (I won't be buying them clothes though )

I've come across a few weird (and nox, this isn't aimed at you) cases of adult kids benefiting from big parental investments like houses, cash, land and excusing it by claiming "sure it's my inheritance anyway" I've a few friends that aren't willing to buy a house and pave their own way in life as their waiting for the family house to come available... it uncomfortably bangs of waiting for the folks to die off! I know one young farmer that took over the family farm, moved in with the girlfriend and informed his female siblings that they were welcome to "stay over" in his house! The family home! The ma still lives in the house. :eek:

tigerboon

_Tyrrell_ wrote: »

I'm only 20, still in college and only working part time, but I pay rent to my parents and cover the phone/tv/internet bill, also pay all of my own bills such as mobile, car insurance etc. It's only fair really, once you're 18 and you can fend for yourself you should be at least.

I'm more than twice your age but you're the only one so far on this thread that has a bit of self respect. When I was at college in the early 90's everyone fended for themselves by part time jobs etc. You have to be one useless bollix to be leeching off parents into your late 20s

tigerboon

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

I think many here will change their attitude when they have grown children of their own and have the means to help them when they are starting adult life.

My children will be reared so they are able to stand on their own two feet. I might have a backup for them but they won't know about it

Midkemia

You'd have to be holding down a serious part time job to get through college without your parents financial support.

Squidgy Black

Midkemia wrote: »

You'd have to be holding down a serious part time job to get through college without your parents financial support.

Not really. Fees are 3000 a year, make that over the summer easily with a bit of saving and extra hours. 20 hours a week during the semester.

Midkemia

_Tyrrell_ wrote: »

Not really. Fees are 3000 a year, make that over the summer easily with a bit of saving and extra hours. 20 hours a week during the semester.

It's doable if you live at home, but very difficult if you have to move out and pay for accommodation and your own living expenses like the majority of students.

DivingDuck

If people want to spend their money on their children, surely that's their own business? Many people derive great pleasure from being able to provide luxuries for their offspring the like of which they were never able to possess in their youth.

So long as the recipient of the money isn't pulling the wool over the parent's eyes ("Mammy, can you help me with a deposit for a flat" when it's actually being spent on hookers and blackjack, etc.), I can't see anything immoral, wrong, or strange about it.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

I think many here will change their attitude when they have grown children of their own and have the means to help them when they are starting adult life.

tigerboon wrote: »

My children will be reared so they are able to stand on their own two feet. I might have a backup for them but they won't know about it

Did I say anything to the contrary??

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

_Tyrrell_ wrote: »

Not really. Fees are 3000 a year, make that over the summer easily with a bit of saving and extra hours. 20 hours a week during the semester.

Speaks someone living in a university town. 12000 won't keep a student in Dublin each year when you have to pay rent, food, utilities, travel etc. So 80 hour weeks???

You know you seem as cosseted as the people you are complaining about.

MouseTail

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

Speaks someone living in a university town. 12000 won't keep a student in Dublin each year when you have to pay rent, food, utilities, travel etc. So 80 hour weeks???

You know you seem as cosseted as the people you are complaining about.

You think students do 60 hour weeks? And of course you can put a child through college in Dublin for less than 12k.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

MouseTail wrote: »

You think students do 60 hour weeks? And of course you can put a child through college in Dublin for less than 12k.

Read the thread. I never said students do any hours. It was in reply to a comment that 20 hours would cover college costs.
I have put several children through college. 12000 per year is a conservative figure. Nothing extravagant, just the necessities. So don't tell me what it cost me , as I know.

frozenfrozen

anyone working to put themselves through college through necessity would be able to get SUSI grant anyway. most-all students I know 'paying their way' through a summer job are just working for their own spending money for going out drinking and paying for car insurance (nothing wrong with this but they're not fully independent). Someone in college would struggle be working enough part time hours / earning enough to pay 3k fees, college books, car + insurance, rent, and food, without the grant or without help from parents.

_Kaiser_

wes wrote: »

I know of no one who get money off there parents who are adults in gainful employment. Surely, the situation would be rather uncommon.

You're joking right? What about all those who get financial help from parents when buying a house for example? Or who get to live rent free at home while they save for the deposits, or just because of circumstances.

I'd say most parents only wish that their financial responsibility to their offspring ends when they get a job.

DEFTLEFTHAND

I'd a part time petrol station job for most of college but my Dad would always give me €100 every Sunday before I went back, he'd say in case you need it. I'd just blow it of course.

It cost him a pretty penny sending us to college between registration fees, accommodation etc. No grants. I'm very grateful to him for it.

steddyeddy

Ken Shamrock wrote: »

Jesus christ, guy makes a thread asking If parent's giving pocket money to working class adults Is strange, guy gets criticized for ONLY paying €350 a month to his parent when majority of people living with their parents don't pay a penny. OP you bad man, you're either working a sh1tty job or you're a sh1t child apparently...

He didn't mention working class.

tigerboon

tigerboon wrote: »

My children will be reared so they are able to stand on their own two feet. I might have a backup for them but they won't know about it

So you wouldn't help them out with a house deposit if you had the money or bail them out if they got into financial difficulty? As an aside I hate that phrase "stand on their own two feet".

_Tyrrell_ wrote: »

Not really. Fees are 3000 a year, make that over the summer easily with a bit of saving and extra hours. 20 hours a week during the semester.

Working a lot is not good for your studies though. I worked during college bit only one day a week and then all summer but the money was for nights out, petrol, lunches etc. my parents covered all college related costs such as fees etc.

Penny Tration

Ridge Fierce Roofing wrote: »

So you wouldn't help them out with a house deposit if you had the money or bail them out if they got into financial difficulty? As an aside I hate that phrase "stand on their own two feet".



Working a lot is not good for your studies though. I worked during college bit only one day a week and then all summer but the money was for nights out, petrol, lunches etc. my parents covered all college related costs such as fees etc.

Surely if you worked more during the summer, you could have relaxed on nights out to cover some of your own expenses instead of expecting your folks to cover it all?

Jenny Thalia

Jenny Thalia wrote: »

Surely if you worked more during the summer, you could have relaxed on nights out to cover some of your own expenses instead of expecting your folks to cover it all?

They wanted to cover them, if I offered I was told that's money to spend on yourself it's our responsibility to cover education costs, accommodation costs at college (or in my case buy me a car as I wanted to live at home). I paid for petrol, insurance (when I could I would get help also at times), lunches, nights out, trips away etc.

They preferred that I could enjoy my time in college and had money to spend on myself rather then being a broke student all the time.

Rough Sleeper

Jenny Thalia wrote: »

Surely if you worked more during the summer, you could have relaxed on nights out to cover some of your own expenses instead of expecting your folks to cover it all?

Around 18-23 are the best years for partying. Maybe Nox's parents were happy to throw him the few quid so he could live it up a bit during his best years. I also know from his posts that his parents live in a rural area so they'll need help from the family when they're old, so things come full circle and the deed is repaid.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Rough Sleeper wrote: »

I also know from his posts that his parents live in a rural area so they'll need help from the family when they're old, so things come full circle and the deed is repaid.

I don't think any parents help their children expecting a quid pro quo.

Rough Sleeper

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

I don't think any parents help their children expecting a quid pro quo.

I'm not saying that they expect it, just that these things often have a way of balancing out in the end.

Also, I think plenty of parents do expect their kids to help them out financially if they've been successful. Most of my relatives on my mother's side have high-paying jobs and my granny has no problem putting the hand out if she needs something. I don't think there's anything wrong with that either.

steddyeddy

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

Speaks someone living in a university town. 12000 won't keep a student in Dublin each year when you have to pay rent, food, utilities, travel etc. So 80 hour weeks???

You know you seem as cosseted as the people you are complaining about.

Of course it will! Plenty do it for a lot less.

steddyeddy

Ridge Fierce Roofing wrote: »

They wanted to cover them, if I offered I was told that's money to spend on yourself it's our responsibility to cover education costs, accommodation costs at college (or in my case buy me a car as I wanted to live at home). I paid for petrol, insurance (when I could I would get help also at times), lunches, nights out, trips away etc.

They preferred that I could enjoy my time in college and had money to spend on myself rather then being a broke student all the time.

But it's not only about being a rich or poor student. College is one of the first opportunities a person has to learn life skills. I don't think giving children handouts is a kindness.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

steddyeddy wrote: »

Of course it will! Plenty do it for a lot less.

Listen, we are not extravagant people and are used to simple living but it took at least 12000 net per year to keep our children at college. Very very few I know around here managed it for much else. You can use anecdotal argument all you like but I'm commenting from the real life experience of someone living a long distance from a university. No amount of comment will change the level of expense I know it came to. Even the students union this year advised a average budget exceeding 10k
Even in my own day university costs, excluding the fees at the time, were a huge part of a family's income.

steddyeddy

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

Listen, we are not extravagant people and are used to simple living but it took at least 12000 net per year to keep our children at college. Very very few I know around here managed it for much else. You can use anecdotal argument all you like but I'm commenting from the real life experience of someone living a long distance from a university. No amount of comment will change the level of expense I know it came to. Even the students union this year advised a average budget exceeding 10k
Even in my own day university costs, excluding the fees at the time, were a huge part of a family's income.

I'm commenting from real life experience as a former student who survived on a lot less and as a PhD who dealt with many people from really poor backgrounds.

The back to education allowance works out at approximately 9700 euro a year. People survive on this alone. The maintenance grant is just under 6 thousand euro a year and students without parental support survive on this alone.

They survive because they have to. They have excellent life skills and I think by giving adult children handouts deprives them of that. I see the difference in students who fund themselves VS those who feel entitled to mammy and daddy's money.

Actually the student's who get funded in entirety by their parents are the ones with the most right wing views towards dole ect. they view it as a handout ironically.

hynesie08

Rough Sleeper wrote: »

Around 18-23 are the best years for partying..

They are in their bollix, Necking cheap cans before heading to whatever ****ebox "club" does 3 euro drinks to listen to ****e music and try to convince some girl to give you the ride (and the clap)......

Actually i do kinda miss it.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

steddyeddy wrote: »

Actually the student's who get funded in entirety by their parents are the ones with the most right wing views towards dole ect. they view it as a handout ironically.

Oh Lord! What a blinkered biased unfounded attitude.

I'm out of here, this has lost l semblance of reality.

steddyeddy

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

Oh Lord! What a blinkered biased unfounded attitude.

I'm out of here, this has lost l semblance of reality.

Actually a lot of the self described recipients of their parents money on this thread are the same dole bashers you see on other threads!

I think it lost semblance of reality when you described adults going to college as needing a few thousand over the dole to survive on.

steddyeddy

Bridget Orange Keynote wrote: »

Listen, we are not extravagant people and are used to simple living but it took at least 12000 net per year to keep our children at college. Very very few I know around here managed it for much else. You can use anecdotal argument all you like but I'm commenting from the real life experience of someone living a long distance from a university. No amount of comment will change the level of expense I know it came to. Even the students union this year advised a average budget exceeding 10k
Even in my own day university costs, excluding the fees at the time, were a huge part of a family's income.

Sorry to requote. The student union aren't financial experts. They are generally well off students who are recipients of some of the student contribution. A few years ago they published accounts showing a one million euro void in their accounts. In other words they're crooks and/or incompetent with money.

conorh91

12k a year sounds about right for putting a kid through college.

Undergraduate fees alone are €3,250, lets say another €3,500 on accommodation (9 months @ €380), and €500 per month 'survival money', including bills, groceries, course expenses, books and travel expenses (€4500).

That's €11,500, despite being frugal, and it also assumes that there will be no rent due over the summer months, which could easily push the cost €1000 higher

Hachiko

PTH2009 wrote: »

Do u find it unusual that grown adults with jobs still get pocket money off there parents ???

I think its more of a case parents getting 'pocket money' from the grown adults with jobs.

conorh91

steddyeddy wrote: »

Sorry to requote. The student union aren't financial experts. They are generally well off students who are recipients of some of the student contribution. .

BS.

The president of TCDSU is a former homeless worker and single mum. People involved in student welfare are often very aware of the needs of financial support.

You sound like you have a massive chip on your shoulder.

steddyeddy

conorh91 wrote: »

12k a year sounds about right for putting a kid through college.

Undergraduate fees alone are €3,250, lets say another €3,500 on accommodation (9 months @ €380), and €500 per month 'survival money', including bills, groceries, course expenses, books and travel expenses (€4500).

That's €11,500, despite being frugal, and it also assumes that there will be no rent due over the summer months, which could easily push the cost €1000 higher

How come students do it on a lot less? Could you break down weekly food?

conorh91

steddyeddy wrote: »

How come students do it on a lot less? Could you break down weekly food?

No. €500 per month for all bills is fairly self evidently not going to allow you to eat filet mignon every night, or dining out in Patrick Gilbaud. It's a Lidl, student budget, when you consider that it has to cover every other bill as mentioned.

Monkeysgomad

PTH2009 wrote: »

Do u find it unusual that grown adults with jobs still get pocket money off there parents ???

My sister, who is 21, is given €2000 every month she still lives at home as she is going to university in the city. I think it is common thing either way of rent or money. She is given it on the ground she goes to uni and maintains good grades. She doesn't have a job

steddyeddy

conorh91 wrote: »

BS.

The president of TCDSU is a former homeless worker and single mum. People involved in student welfare are often very aware of the needs of financial support.

You sound like you have a massive chip on your shoulder.

I was referring to the UCD union. Hopeless. TCD seems more in tune with student finances.

Seems like my views hit a raw nerve. I work on the real frontline with poor students. I'll respond to your last well thought out rebuttal of my points with the quote “Ad hominem is an argument of the weak and insecure.”

steddyeddy

conorh91 wrote: »

No. €500 per month for all bills is fairly self evidently not going to allow you to eat filet mignon every night, or dining out in Patrick Gilbaud. It's a Lidl, student budget, when you consider that it has to cover every other bill as mentioned.

100 a month for food so ~400 for the rest. Seems like a lot.

Lia_lia

Monkeysgomad wrote: »

My sister, who is 21, is given €2000 every month she still lives at home as she is going to university in the city. I think it is common thing either way of rent or money. She is given it on the ground she goes to uni and maintains good grades. She doesn't have a job

€2000 a month?! Jayzus. Is that a typo?

conorh91

steddyeddy wrote: »

100 a month for food so ~400 for the rest. Seems like a lot.

We're talking about humans, not dogs.

Most parents will not want their child to have to feed themselves on about €3.50 per day.

There is nothing extravagant about paying all utility bills, phone, books, travel, groceries and unanticipated expenses with €500 per month.

Lia_lia

When I was in college I spent about €20 per week on food. Less sometimes!

Tigger

are you vegetarian ?

Lia_lia

Yes

steddyeddy

Lia_lia wrote: »

When I was in college I spent about €20 per week on food. Less sometimes!

I spent 25. Breakdown on way.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

conorh91 wrote: »

We're talking about humans, not dogs.

Most parents will not want their child to have to feed themselves on about €3.50 per day.

There is nothing extravagant about paying all utility bills, phone, books, travel, groceries and unanticipated expenses with €500 per month.

Very true. Shopping for food, cleaning products, personal hygiene etc costs much more than 100 per month. Travel costs alone came close to 150 per month for us. Gas, electricity, broadband all added up. Phone wasn't bad as they kept usage to a bare minimum. Books for some courses were hundreds. We got no back to college allowances or grants at all. I know exactly what it cost as I paid it. It was the bare minimum and all this talk of it being done for less gets my goat as I know it can be done for less but not possible for us. I envy those with colleges near their homes. We were pinned to our collar for many years and did without much to manage.

But, I don't begrudge my kids having the opportunity as they now are a Teacher, a Midwife, a Social Worker, and a Union Official so all giving back something to society.

conorh91

steddyeddy wrote: »

I spent 25. Breakdown on way.

Why bother? If you live on pasta and baked beans, I'm sure you can feed yourself for 3 quid a day. But we're talking about normal expectations for healthy people, as well as all the other bills you're ignoring.

Maybe we're all deluded on the price of living except you. In which case, I suggest you contact Joan Burton and demand that she reduce welfare rates at once. Send her your bill. I won't argue with you then.

DivingDuck

I spent more on food in college than I do now as I didn't have the experience to shop as cannily as I do these days, nor the facilities to bulk buy/freeze/store which are available to me currently.

Pink Lemons

I know one girl who gets weekly pocket money off her daddy, but he's not one of her parents.

steddyeddy

conorh91 wrote: »

Why bother? If you live on pasta and baked beans, I'm sure you can feed yourself for 3 quid a day. But we're talking about normal expectations for healthy people, as well as all the other bills you're ignoring.

Maybe we're all deluded on the price of living except you. In which case, I suggest you contact Joan Burton and demand that she reduce welfare rates at once. Send her your bill. I won't argue with you then.

I'll bother because you're conflating eating on a budget with unhealthy eating.

Twenty Euro gets you 5 chicken fillets, 5 pork chops, a pound of mince, a pound of diced beef and a lion of pork in some butchers around Dublin such as F.X Buckley's. Frozen veg brings you up to approximately 25 euro.

You keep saying except me. Students survive and eat well on the maintenance grant and the back to education allowance. These grants are roughly 1/2 and 3/4 of the 12k figure used earlier.

Actually Conor you should write to Joan and tell her people need at least 12K to live on. According to you people on less than the 12k live like dogs. Should we increase the dole?