Wanker watch: Warning signs that someone is a tosser

cowboyBuilder

dudara wrote: »

Someone who walks through a door and doesn't check if there's someone behind them, or doesn't make sure the door is shut after them

People who treat waitstaff and customer service people badly. Or doesn't even say thank you.

These are simple things, but they stand out to me about a person

Yeah, likewise someone who clicks to get a waiters attention, I wanna f*cking smack their face!!!!

Boskowski

SSLguru wrote: »

Someone who promotes the reckless open borders policy this country has.

Of course if you oppose reckless mass immigration they will scream "racist " at you whilst then droning on about diversity.

White guilt is eating them alive

Anyone who harps on and on about how the country is being swarmed by blacks. In a country where I can drive for hours without actually seeing one. Not that that matters.

Well you found the right thread after all anyway.

Detached Retina

Deleted User wrote: »

What's wrong with wearing a lanyard?

Indeed. They're usually your security swipe into the building you work/your work car park, in many companies, and secondary schools have them too now.

newmug

Kev W wrote: »

What about a bully that only bullies people about being lazy?

There's standard ****, then there's bully ****, then there's lazy ****. All equally wankerish. I've no time for any of them.

Detached Retina

wetlandsboy wrote: »

People who wear skinny tracksuit bottoms in the gym. People who wear hoodies over a baseball hat in the gym. Gyms certainly get an awful amount of gimps.

Or those multi coloured lycra man leggings with v neck tee that have now crept outside the gym into every day life :eek:

slangamerican

Anyone that has gone away for a year and then spends the next 5 years saying "it wasn't like this in xxxx" & "they didn't do it like that in xxxx' Yeah I get it you've been away somewhere

mikedoherty99

Boskowski wrote: »

Anyone who harps on and on about how the country is being swarmed by blacks. In a country where I can drive for hours without actually seeing one. Not that that matters.

Were you driving at nightime?

Raven Runner

Someone's sense of style or how they have their hair doesn't define them as a person, you should be judged on how you act not how you look.

Ramza

Raven Runner wrote: »

, you should be judged on how you act not how you look.

In an ideal world maybe

Sever Tomorrow

Left wingers who are so scared to trample on religious sensitivities that they become apologists for Islamism. Perhaps they may hold the opinion that the West is 100% to blame, but even if they show respect to states and a culture that oppress the liberal values they all love so much. The irony is lost on them.

Equally those on the Far Right who incite violence against all Muslims or just blame them for everything.

DareGod

Puibo wrote: »

People who wear their work badges outsife of work. "Oh look at me and my badge with my face on it"

In fairness, sometimes you do forget that it's even there. Or, you know it's there but you simply don't care what anyone else thinks about you wearing it. I highly doubt that it's really ever done on purpose to "show off." Although I'm sure there are some **** who do that, but not most people.

Lia_lia

People who talk about their diets, macros, protein shakes and workouts. In great detail. All the time. ****.

The odd time is fine.

DareGod

Oh I remembered another one.

People who say things like "I'm an absolutely lovely person, but get on the wrong side of me and you'll know about it!"

or

"I'm a really nice person, but do anything to hurt my family and you'll feel my wraith!"

EH, no, you're not a lovely or a nice person. You're an aggressive psychopath, no matter what way you try to frame it in order to help yourself sleep at night. And I would be mortified if my mother ever spoke like that.

And in my experience, it's ALWAYS women who sh1te on like this. A certain type of women. You know the type.

Bongalongherb

People that say the words... Going Forward :mad:

Government slang for going forward. It should access more folk to enter the tax-net Going Forward. I'd love to physically kill those words.

kowloon

Radio hosts who mix alcohol and painkillers when travelling by air.

ChunkyLover54

Is anything not a sign that someone is a tosser?

fonecrusher1

Phoney fakey embarrassing American accents on Irish people who have never been anywhere near the place in their lives.

You know who you are. Oh yes you do

Bongalongherb

ChunkyLover54 wrote: »

Is anything not a sign that someone is a tosser?

Someone that says tosser on an Irish website forum could be an arsehole.

Aglomerado

Sunglasses on top of their head.

superfurry1

Talking about your girlfriend in work like everybody knows her oh well me and Sammy went for this and sammy thought this was great bla bla bla we get it you have a girlfriend

Kev W

superfurry1 wrote: »

Talking about your girlfriend in work like everybody knows her oh well me and Sammy went for this and sammy thought this was great bla bla bla we get it you have a girlfriend

Don't worry, you'll meet someone.

Akrasia

People who get sh1tfaced when they're out every single weekend and then come into work hungover on Monday and insist on telling you about how they're so mortified at what they did on saturday night...


1. I don't care

2. Shut up, I've got work to do

3. It's not an accident if you do it every weekend.

Akrasia

People that talk to you about the soaps or celebrity gossip all day long, but then call you wierd because of the one time you mention (at length) how cool graphene is.

jca

BoJack Horseman wrote: »

Had to lookup what 'SJW' was.

****.

What is it? I'm too lazy to look it up...

peteeeed

grey tracksuit bottoms

jca

5rtytry56 wrote: »

Senior Citizens who have to mention "the grandchildren" at least every third or fourth sentence in everyday general chitchat.

They're usually the ones who beat the living ****e out of their own children 25-30 years ago..

PizzamanIRL

This is a fairly obvious sign

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10203544203564633&id=1800992303

OwaynOTT

I was expecting a watch that is solely worn by ****, that would help me detect them.


Someone who says 'your welcome' in a shop when you say thanks, they should be saying thanks back.

WesternZulu

Sleeve tattoos.

superfurry1

Kev W wrote: »

Don't worry, you'll meet someone.

I have ha, This is the same guy who said when i asked if he remembered a song when a 90s pop song was on the radio in the background he replied, oh is it pop? i wouldnt know about what the cool kids listen to nowadays- he is in his early 30s fcuk sake. This was recently by the way not in the 90s;)

valoren

Aglomerado wrote: »

Sunglasses on top of their head.

Wearing sunglasses indoors.

jca

tayto lover wrote: »

Women who have all their groceries through the checkout and then go rummaging through their handbags looking for their purse.
Have your feckin money ready.

Or decide they've forgotten "something" and ten minutes later the dither head arrives back with half a trolley load in her arms.....

Saipanne

Youngblood.III wrote: »

Anyone currently wearing a beard and "that" haircut....with the "Dandy" clothes.

That would be the favoured haircut of the Waffen SS? I always found it strange that people's fashion would be inspired by the Nazi's...

valoren

Saipanne wrote: »

That would be the favoured haircut of the Waffen SS? I always found it strange that people's fashion would be inspired by the Nazi's...

Hugo Boss designed the SS uniforms and was a paid up member of the Nazi party.

jca

People who pronounce the word buoy, boo-eee and the letter Z as zee does my head in.

Tweeter

Anyone who has a selfie stick

josephryan1989

Kilkenny jersey

kunst nugget

jca wrote: »

People who pronounce the letter Z as zee does my head in.

If you pronounce it 'zed' it ruins the whole flow of the alphabet rhyme:

A, B, C, D, E, F, G!
H, I, J, K, LMNOP!
Q, R, S, T, U, V!
W, X, Y and Zed?

Doesn't work…

jca

kunst nugget wrote: »

If you pronounce it 'zed' it ruins the whole flow of the alphabet rhyme:

A, B, C, D, E, F, G!
H, I, J, K, LMNOP!
Q, R, S, T, U, V!
W, X, Y and Zed?

Doesn't work…

I meant for people who don't need the Sesame Street song to know their alphabet....

superfurry1

kunst nugget wrote: »

If you pronounce it 'zed' it ruins the whole flow of the alphabet rhyme:

A, B, C, D, E, F, G!
H, I, J, K, LMNOP!
Q, R, S, T, U, V!
W, X, Y and Zed?

Doesn't work…

The sick Zedebera was taken to the Hospitibill

Saipanne

valoren wrote: »

Hugo Boss designed the SS uniforms and was a paid up member of the Nazi party.

Interesting. I wonder do hipsters know they are sporting the Nazi look?

kunst nugget

jca wrote: »

I meant for people who don't need the Sesame Street song to know their alphabet....

If Sesame Street and Dr. Zeuss use 'Zee',
Then 'Zee' is the perfect one for me.

kunst nugget

jca wrote: »

What is it? I'm too lazy to look it up...

SJW is a worker on the SJ train service in Sweden. Biggest bunch of **** you'll ever meet.

kunst nugget

DareGod wrote: »

Oh I remembered another one.

People who say things like "I'm an absolutely lovely person, but get on the wrong side of me and you'll know about it!"

or

"I'm a really nice person, but do anything to hurt my family and you'll feel my wraith!"

EH, no, you're not a lovely or a nice person. You're an aggressive psychopath, no matter what way you try to frame it in order to help yourself sleep at night. And I would be mortified if my mother ever spoke like that.

And in my experience, it's ALWAYS women who sh1te on like this. A certain type of women. You know the type.

The bloke version is 'I won't start a fight but I won't walk away from one either!!!'

akelly02

biko wrote: »

Anyone with a TapOut tshirt

i have 2 Tapout Hoodies, look well actually. GF got the 2 of them for 30 quid in Heatons. Since i didnt buy them but do occasionally wear them do i count?!

Kev W

Anyone who gives a toss about other people taking selfies. People have been taking photos of themselves for as long as it's been possible to do so and nobody cared. Then one day someone started calling them "selfies" and all of a sudden it's the end of civilization.

Kev W

superfurry1 wrote: »

I have ha, This is the same guy who said when i asked if he remembered a song when a 90s pop song was on the radio in the background he replied, oh is it pop? i wouldnt know about what the cool kids listen to nowadays- he is in his early 30s fcuk sake. This was recently by the way not in the 90s;)

Yeah, not everyone listens to or follows pop music.

Rubberlegs

valoren wrote: »

Wearing sunglasses indoors.

Heh, that makes me a tosser! Mine are prescription and I'm always forgetting to swop glasses when I go inside, especially if it's a bright place

It's probably been said already, but people with their phones at the dinner table on nights out. Photographing every course to put it up on Facebook. Jesus Christ just eat the damn food before it goes cold! Nobody cares, twats !!

akelly02

Mr_Muffin wrote: »

Not a whole lot to learn about UFC to be fair - it's just 2 guys in a ring fighting.

Not a ring, but an Octagon. There is quite a bit to it if you are a noob.

jca

Kev W wrote: »

Anyone who gives a toss about other people taking selfies. People have been taking photos of themselves for as long as it's been possible to do so and nobody cared. Then one day someone started calling them "selfies" and all of a sudden it's the end of civilization.

No, people have been taking pictures of each other since the invention of photography not of themselves every second, there is a major difference.