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How do I get my 5 year old boy to join out of school activities?

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  • 07-09-2015 10:00pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    My little boy is 5 years old, going on 6. He is all talk about joining certain activities but when he gets there he just gets so nervous and wants to go home. Any ideas how I can get him to just start. I'm sure when he does start he'll love it.


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    #2
    pwurple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    I'd say bring him to things his friends are already doing, and point them out to him as soon as he gets there. It's all about the little buddies! A big group of strangers is intimidating for anyone, let alone a 5 year old.


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    #3
    MinnieMinx
    Registered Users Posts: 232 ✭✭MinnieMinx


    What sort of activities are you taking him to? Are you able to stay in the room/pitch with him for a bit at the beginning?

    My DH takes our 6yr old to GAA football on a Friday night and stays to help coach. We're from the UK so have zero knowledge of Gaelic footy but at that age it's about learning basic ball skills and team building.

    I take him to Irish dancing classes and leave him there to get on with it. I think moving to a new country at 5 where we knew no-one meant he had no choice but to join in really. It's actually done wonders for his confidence as he just chats to any children he meets when he's out playing in a park etc.

    Your boy's only 5 so still very young really. What's he like at school? Does he join in at playtime or sit on the side lines? Why not speak to his teacher and see what they think might help improve his confidence in new situations?

    If the activity lasts 45 mins, you could tell him he has to stay for at least twenty minutes before he can leave. By then he might have settled into it. Also, offer a simple treat for afterwards as a reward for staying?

    Finally, how are you when he goes to a new activity? If you're feeling anxious on his behalf he'll pick up on it so you do need to be all smiles and fake confidence about this exciting new adventure he's getting involved in.

    Good luck!


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    #4
    _Brian
    Registered Users Posts: 18,569 ✭✭✭✭_Brian


    Definitely easier if their friends are there doing the same things. Any chance it would go better if they were brought by their friends parents - maybe arrange to drop them to their friends house and then they for from there. You could arrive maybe 10 minutes after it starts to be there for them. Obviously the other parent would need to understand why your doing this.

    We also had a deal with ours that they would try the activity for one term and then could decide to quit or keep it up.


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    #5
    Clearlier
    Registered Users Posts: 4,454 ✭✭✭Clearlier


    rathmum2905 wrote: »
    My little boy is 5 years old, going on 6. He is all talk about joining certain activities but when he gets there he just gets so nervous and wants to go home. Any ideas how I can get him to just start. I'm sure when he does start he'll love it.

    When I first started bringing my eldest to football when he was 4 I had to do the warm up with him but once he realised that he knew a couple of the others from school he gravitated towards them and I was able to move back to the sidelines. I'm still working with my youngest who's 5 but we realised not too long ago that he's partially sighted which explains a lot of his reticence so now it's just about adapting the environment and his strategies. A work in progress but we'll get there.


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