Need advice - 7 month old will not sleep soundly

cjpm

Hi. Need some advice with our first born.

Have a 7 month old breastfed baby that will rarely take naps and is constantly waking up at night. The longest he's ever slept is 5 hours and he frequently wakes every hour or so. He is on solids over a month and is eating great.

Impossible to get him into any sort of routine. Have tried bath before the cot, stories, white noise etc. etc.

He is in a cot in the nursery, we have an angel monitor and always comfort him as soon as he wakes upset. He likes to be held, but getting him back to sleep can be very difficult. Would he sleep better if the cot was in our room??

Any suggestions would be very welcome.

JP

detoxkid

[quota="cjpm;97163391"]Hi. Need some advice with our first born.

Have a 7 month old breastfed baby that will rarely take naps and is constantly waking up at night. The longest he's ever slept is 5 hours and he frequently wakes every hour or so. He is on solids over a month and is eating great.

Impossible to get him into any sort of routine. Have tried bath before the cot, stories, white noise etc. etc.

He is in a cot in the nursery, we have an angel monitor and always comfort him as soon as he wakes upset. He likes to be held, but getting him back to sleep can be very difficult. Would he sleep better if the cot was in our room??

Any suggestions would be very welcome.

JP[/quote]

Our daughter was exactly like this at 7 months. She is 16 months now and she sleeps from 7.30-6.30 min...so hang tight it will improve! I can't pin point how or why but a few things I do think helped...I put her into creche when she was ten months just before I went back to work. From then on in she started napping during the day which I can only put down to them being stricter and more consistent than I was. The naps helped the nighttime sleep. I stopped breastfeeding her around 8.5 months and gave her formula...unfortunatly this also helped her sleep longer...I know some breastfed babies are great sleepers but I know loads who aren't and we fell into that category. Having said that I found it so difficult giving up breastfeeding and u are not guaranteed baby will sleep longer so not surr if if really recommend it. She def slept better in her own room and black out blinds make a huge difference. Also if she wakes I comfort her but give it five before lifting her....and religiously she has calmed down by that time

bp

In the same boat here....willing to try anything!!!

Trying a sip of water at night to break the habit of being bf

cjpm

Thanks for those tips. My wife and I are totally running out of steam at this stage due to the lack of quality sleep. Finding it really tough going!!

Any other suggestions very welcome...

RentDayBlues

cjpm wrote: »

Thanks for those tips. My wife and I are totally running out of steam at this stage due to the lack of quality sleep. Finding it really tough going!!

Any other suggestions very welcome...

The saying "sleep begets sleep" is key, the better they nap during the day the more they will sleep at night. I used routine and the cry it out method on both of mine, it takes time and a lot of patience but in the end everyone gets sleep and everyone will be happier!

At 7 months my youngest would go to bed at 7:30 and sleep til 3, feed and then back til 7, but often woke at 5 for another feed. I got to know when she was waking out of habit or hunger

I was very strict on day time naps, at that age she would have had 2/3 per day, with no more than 3 hours between naps.

Even now, if either of mine misses their nap or doesn't get a full nap, they won't sleep well at night, it's a vicious cycle.

I know it's hard to be firm when you have a crying baby but I really did find it was the best solution. Also, until our youngest was 10 months we had Brahms lullaby playing on loop very low in her room every night, so if she woke she felt comforted and could settle herself

As other posters have said, it does get better.

dori_dormer

My boy was a nightmare at that age too. Awake every 2 hrs (and he was bottle fed and a great eater!)

We tried making one change every week, and used it consistently to see if it worked or not. Doing multiple new things will confuse you and the baby. Cry it out is extremely stressful for the baby so I wouldn't recommend it, lots of studies being done about the negative effects of it.

Our boy was a light sleeper , so white noise helped drown out children/lawn mowers/ doorbells/tv etc. having the cot warm before transfer was key too as he only fell asleep in our arms, sometimes he wouldn't transfer at all, so I'd sit in the rocking chair for 90 min!

I agree sorting naps first will help the nighttime situation. I also used a sling and he'd nap in that during the day.

Our fella was in our room until 13mths. Simply because I didn't want to get up and go all the way down the hall in the cold 5 times a night

He's been sleeping decently now since about 16 months. He wakes me up once or twice a night but doesn't cry for me, and goes back to sleep himself

LegacyUser

I don't think there's anything wrong with him breastfeeding, but you're saying he's hard to get back to sleep. Can he go to sleep by himself? Does he ever go into the cot awake and fall asleep by himself, or is he always nursed or rocked or held or something til he goes to sleep, night and day? If so, it may that he simply doesn't know how to go to sleep by himself, and he needs that to be recreated every time he wakes up, in order to go back to sleep.

I'd leave the cot where it is. I can't tell you why he's waking, but I know with ours, she went through many phases like that! The problem is that the older they get, the more lively they get and the more interested they are in the world around them, so if they can't fall back asleep by themselves, you're in trouble! I found with ours that was the age where I had to stand back and let her do it herself because all the rocking and ssshing and walking in the world had stopped working. And my back was sore from it!

I made sure she had a big bottle at bedtime -bigger than the usual daytime ones, so I was sure she wasn't waking from hunger, and I did a dream feed around 10pm when I was heading to bed (she only ever took a couple of ounces of that). Then if she woke during the night I was happy she wasn't starving. When she woke, I went in once, settled her and left her in the cot - she did not come out of it. And I literally repeated that every 10 minutes until she went back to sleep. It's hard as hell but seriously, stick it out for 3-5 nights and it will work. They say give it 2 weeks to bed that kind of thing down but from mine and friend's experiences the worst tends to be over after three consistent nights of it. You HAVE to be consistent though. The first couple of nights are the hardest. I remember watching the clock - going in at 2:30am, 2:40am, 2:50am.....but it worked...!

Good naps during the day are absolutely key and a fairly consistent bedtime routine. Include teddies or a blanket or something for him to use as a comfort - a soother, if that's what you use too. And once he's in the cot - he's not coming out!! That is a message in itself. I know it might sound a bit heartless, but genuinely, you have to stick with it. I wasn't able for the crying it out thing myself, I preferred going in every 10-15 mins to soothe a bit. These things can develop into a habit - I always thought of it as myself, sometimes I'd go through phases of waking at 3:30am every morning and once I did it one or two nights, it continued for a few weeks! Babies do it too, only they don't realise that's what's happening. You can put yourself back to sleep, they can't, they have to learn to do it, and you have to help them in that. I preferred to let my little one know I was close by and there if she was really upset, but otherwise she had to go to sleep herself.

Sort it now if you can, because it's way way harder when they get older to sort that out!

Fagashlil

Would you consider cosleping? My almost 1 year old night weaned a couple of months ago, but still loves the company and reassurance of someone there. He goes down at 7:30 pm and wakes once (tonight was at 9:15) looking for his dodo, then slept throught till 7:30/8, and if he mooches in his sleep he feel we're there and stays fast asleep.

comongethappy

My 1 year old isn't a great sleeper, and still bf for comfort. He starts out in his own cot and will fall asleep on his own in it with me in the room, occasionally even if I leave.

I might be able to resettle him a couple times, but will end up in our bed around anywhere from 11pm -2am. Sometimes he will bf, but most of the time if.he is in at 11 he just has his soother and cuddles into me. If he gets restless around 4, he is looking for a bit of space so I pop him back in his room. Then around 6:30 he comes in for a quick feed and rest with Daddy while I ready for work.

I often have wondered to myself if his need to bf for comfort is keeping him up, but after talking to both breast and bottle feeders, if you don't have a baby that loves to sleep or don't believe in letting them cry it out, then you just have to go with the.flow of whatever comforts your baby and allows you to get the most sleep. And many of the moms who bottle fed would have to take turns walking the halls with their babies, I am glad a boob in his mouth lets us all.have a bit of rest

pwurple

Does the baby have a soother? The sucking action is so comforting to them. If you tried one and it was refused, try a few different shapes and put a few drops of milk on it.

bp

I am considering a sleep expert, if I go through with it I will let you.

My 6 month old slept better as a new born :-(

dori_dormer

There's loads of sleep regressions in the first year, it's linked to their development and learning of skills.
Most sleep experts I've heard of just make you do cry it out / controlled crying.

Have you read the no cry sleep solution? Some great tips in there

Lucuma

dori_dormer wrote: »

Most sleep experts I've heard of just make you do cry it out / controlled crying.

Which works for some people and not for others. But it does work for some people

How Strange

Neither of mine slept well at 7 months. As dori-dormer said there are loads of sleep regressions, leaps, teething etc at this age.

My son started sleeping better at 10 months and except for a bad phase of teething he was sleeping through most nights by 1 year.

Triangla

Hi OP, I have similar aged baby.

Don't go down the soother route, you'll end up in and out all night as it pops out of their mouth. Went through this two months ago until we just took soother away. We had some long nights with controlled crying but there was light at end of the tunnel and we go him to sleep from 7 to 6 now.

When baby wakes, rub their head /back/tummy softly. Keep the contact to a minimum and don't pick them up to fall asleep in your arms. They will just get used to this and be unable to self soothe back to sleep themselves.

It's around teething time so there may be teething pains, it might be worthwhile trying some Calpol or Neurofen for kids before bed and some Calgel or Bonjella for kids.

I used the Gina Ford Contented Baby books and swear by them.

pwurple

I'm not a fan of the Gina ford books myself. Some of those methods I thought were unnecessarily cruel to an infant. Prefer Elizabeth pantly and Tracey Hogg.

bp

Well have booked a sleep consultant...way too sleep deprived to read books! Especially with a 2 year old running around

Whispered

When a baby cries stress hormones are released in their body. Interestingly, the same happens to the child's mother. We are not genitically built to ignore our babies cries.

Using cry it out or controlled crying, studies have shown that even when they eventually stop crying at night the baby has stress hormones. The baby hasn't learned to self soothe, just that there is no point in crying out for their mother.

I'm on mobile so can't link but the information is readily available if you wish to look it up.

I second the suggestion of the no cry sleep solution. It's also very important to look after yourself op, take turns with your partner, try get away from being a parent every now and again etc.

I'm in the middle of a sleep regression with my 9 month old at the moment. He was never a great sleeper but now he's waking hourly. It seems when he's learning something new it's a bit worse. So crawling, standing, copying noises etc all came with some sleep disturbances. The only thing that keeps me sane is reminding myself that it'll pass

bp

Ok so spoke to a sleep consultant yesterday. A lot of practical advice (which yes you could get from reading baby books if you had the time/ energy) but what I needed was a plan drawn up for me and some support

We start today with it so I will let you know how it goes. Waking 5-6 times a night and hit and miss naps are impractical and tiring!!!

Lucuma

bp wrote: »

Ok so spoke to a sleep consultant yesterday. A lot of practical advice (which yes you could get from reading baby books if you had the time/ energy) but what I needed was a plan drawn up for me and some support

We start today with it so I will let you know how it goes. Waking 5-6 times a night and hit and miss naps are impractical and tiring!!!

Best of luck with it bp. It sounds exhausting

Whispered

Totally agree with you there op. I find it so hard to read a book and put the advice into practise because I'm so tired all the time. I get muddled when it comes to trying to "plan sleep" simply because it's a bit of a bone of contention. When it feels like everybody else has a child who sleeps you feel like you're failing at mothering. Well at least I do at times.

Someone to give you a plan would make it easier I reckon. We couldn't afford a sleep consultant, I hope it works for you.

Fwiw my boy slept from 10 - 5 last night. With one little wake up at about 12 but it lasted a minute. For us that's a good stretch and it has given me hope that he might start to sleep for us soon.

I heard my husband sayin "oh you're so good sleeping, I'm going to miss the nighttime madness" I could have killed him!