Ex wants me back

TheFitz13

Hey guys, back in August, me and my boyfriend broke up for literally 4 hours. It was him that broke up with me but for those 4 hours I was obviosily heartbroken. He came back that night sobbing and begged me for another chance. I gave him it.

Now a few weeks ago, he told me that he wasn't happy in the relationship and that he didn't see a future with us, however he would try to work for it. Two days later he broke up with me. I was completely devastated. I had panic attacks in work, had to go to a councellor, all that sort of stuff. Each time I talked to him I begged him to come back but he insisted that it was over. A few days later I found out that he was talking to somebody else, which honestly took a lot out of me. He went mad at me and told me I had to move on, so I did.

Over the next few weeks I started to feel a lot better, I blocked all communication with him, and I even started talking to a new guy which I really like. I was still hurting a little though. However, my ex sent me a few call Mes the other night, so I got my friend to ring him and he just asked how I was... Ok? Then a few nights ago it happened again, so I sent one back and he rang me. He begged me to come back, begged like begged so much. He said he made a huge mistake and that he would never ever hurt me again and that he didn't realise how much I meant to him. Apparently the past weeks have been torture on him and he even said he has been advised to go to a home for 2 weeks. He's definaly trying to guilt me into going back.

I'm confused and hurt, I don't want to go back to him cause I'm happy and I can see something happening with this new guy, any advice on how I should go about this?

Dr.Internet

Stop calling your ex when he texts you call me?

Buona Fortuna

Hi Fitz. I don't think you should get back with this guy. He's dumped you twice IMO he'll do it again.

In your future life together there will always be the threat of him walking away, in the background.

Also if he was so desperate to get back together, he should have put a bit more effort in than just phoning.

All the best OP

punisher5112

Op move on to bigger and better things.


Do not fall for that rubbish.

I did and she took me for a fool and my money.

Who sends call me messages these days?????

kylith

If you don't want to go back to him, and I can certainly see why you wouldn't, don't. Just tell him 'no thanks' and block him again. It sounds to me like he thought he'd have a great time being footloose and fancy free and when it didn't work out like that he thought that you'd be there waiting for him. Tell him to jog on.

Panthro

As me Ma would say 'don't bother your Barney with that wan'.
Momma didn't raise no fool!

Turtle_

To be fair to the OP she's saying she doesn't want to go back to him...


OP, I'd send him a message saying that you've moved on and don't have any interest in getting back together and are cutting contact. Just be matter of a fact about it, don't get emotional saying you care about him so much etc. Just matter of a fact, something along the lines of: I think I need to clarify after our conversation that I have moved on from the break up and won't be starting another relationship with you. At this stage we need to cut communication for the foreseeable future, so please don't phone or message me.

It probably sounds very harsh but he's messing you around and needs a very clear message that it's not on and to leave you alone.

Don't contact him afterwards, delete his number, unfriend him on facebook. He's clearly not in a place where the two of you can have a friendship, so keeping lines of communication open is only going to cause hassle.

Lamp69

My longest relationship was 3.5 years and in that time we broke up numerous times. It was hell going through each breakup and I don't want you going down the same path and wasting years of your life with the wrong person. A friend said recently once you break up there's usually no going back from it ( they were together 10 years!!! ). Stay away and stay strong xx

TheFitz13

Thank you for all the responses guys! Very grateful x

CaraMay

Ah he's a messer op. He wants to get bs k when he realised the grass isn't greener but then he scoots off again. Text him and say you've moved on, then block him.

mapaca

Send him one last text (don't call!) telling him to take a hike. Then block, delete, ignore, move on. He had his chance already.

Colser

mapaca wrote: »

Send him one last text (don't call!) telling him to take a hike. Then block, delete, ignore, move on. He had his chance already.

I would agree with this but I woundnt text him,he doesnt deserve it.

irishdude11

To be frank about it he thought he'd get the ride elsewhere without too much trouble and it hasnt worked out that way....i guarantee thats what this is, seen this situation plenty of times with blokes i know...if he had've got laid like he expected he would not have come crawling back like this.

ShaShaBear

Had this exact same thing happen with my last ex OP. He had the gumption to text me (after roughly 3 years of on-and-off) and tell me he wanted to travel the world and meet new people and wanted to be single to do it. I told him fine, I wouldn't be waiting about and to come and get his stuff and to return mine. Within an hour he was apologising and begging me back and even my own mother got involved, telling me to "stop playing games". I took him back, and three days later he did exactly the same thing. This time I made it clear. Clean break, no contact - I deleted him off all social media, added his number to a blocking app on my phone etc.
About 6-7 months later I started seeing my current partner, and as soon as he got wind of it , he started trying to weasel his way back in. Would start messaging my mother and sister on Facebook, then tried to add me (he got a shockingly prompt block) and then asked my mother why I didn't want to be friends! When I got engaged, emails started coming from new accounts. He even logged into his sister's Facebook pretending that "she" had found something of mine and wanted an address to return it to. The attempts at contact did not cease until he found someone himself.

Long story short, I'd second what another poster said. He didn't get any action or enough of it to justify leaving you for good. You've taken him back before and he needs a good ego rub, so is chancing his arm again. Block him and move on!