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Why nervous around my brother?

  • 06-12-2015 9:14pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hello everyone-I'd really like some insight in order to understand this situation. Is this fairly normal?

    I noticed my newish boyfriend (2-3 months-he's 23) is quite nervous around my brother who's slightly younger. The first time they met he looked positively scared (!) though this is before he (bro) actually entered the room! He is beginning to thaw out a bit more with him, but even so. I should mention in his defence though he was somewhat nervous when he met my friends for the first time. He's been fine with my sister. The other thing I've noticed is that when by bro is staying at mine he doesn't like staying over. I like having him there! We've not had sex yet, though of course I haven't told my brother this...none of his business!

    He's a really nice, straightforward sort of guy and I trust him-always respectful to me and who ironically in all probability treats women far better than my bro who tends to be a bit of a player!


Comments

  • #2
    jimmycrackcorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,346 ✭✭✭✭jimmycrackcorm


    Nobody here is going to know. Shouldn't you just ask your boyfriend why he feels so nervous?


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    jimmycrackcorm wrote: »
    Nobody here is going to know. Shouldn't you just ask your boyfriend why he feels so nervous?

    Sure. Forgot to mention-boyfriend, when asked said he hadn't realised this was the case! The only conclusion I can come to is that he may fear brother is 'judging' him and some bros can be overly-protective of their sisters. Mine isn't really like that....

    Just wondering really..


  • #4
    PinkLemonade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 768 ✭✭✭PinkLemonade


    Why so nervour? wrote: »
    Sure. Forgot to mention-boyfriend, when asked said he hadn't realised this was the case! The only conclusion I can come to is that he may fear brother is 'judging' him and some bros can be overly-protective of their sisters. Mine isn't really like that....

    Just wondering really..

    No one here will know and you'll probably end up exacerbating the issue if you keep asking him why he's acting strange around your brother, just give them time. There's no need for them to be instant best friends


  • #5
    Shrap
    Registered Users Posts: 3,163 ✭✭✭Shrap


    Why so nervour? wrote: »
    Sure. Forgot to mention-boyfriend, when asked said he hadn't realised this was the case! The only conclusion I can come to is that he may fear brother is 'judging' him and some bros can be overly-protective of their sisters. Mine isn't really like that....

    Just wondering really..

    I'm thinking that if you continue pointing out things like that to your boyfriend, he may come to the conclusion that it's you judging him that's a problem, not your brother! When I met my bf's sister, I was pretty terrified. It SOOO wouldn't have helped if my bf had asked why I was so nervous and would have demonstrated a major lack of understanding on his part.


  • #6
    Augme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,139 ✭✭✭Augme


    Most young guys generally **** themselves around the brother and father of his new girlfriend. It will just take him time to get settled. I wouldn't worry about it.


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