You Bought my 6 year old a WHAT???

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

That's why most companies look at people's experiences rather than qualifications when there employing them. And unless you have your own kids then your experience is limited .

I have experience of buying an iPad for a child- that I bought a child proof case for. She shares it with her sisters and mum controls her usage.

But as I haven't fertilised any eggs my opinion should be discounted???

drunkmonkey

Del2005 wrote: »

Did the 6 year old ask his Godfather for get it? You can't really blame him for getting something that was requested.

The only good thing is that because you have no Internet he'll be sick of it in 10 minutes so the chances of it being broken are low.

She needs to get her head around educational apps for her children's sake.

ted1

Del2005 wrote: »

Did the 6 year old ask his Godfather for get it? You can't really blame him for getting something that was requested.

The only good thing is that because you have no Internet he'll be sick of it in 10 minutes so the chances of it being broken are low.

If he asked for it, then the kid doesn't know the difference between and iPad running iOS or a basic tablet for any version of android , so more the fool the god father is

Moonbeam

Gaygooner wrote: »

You don't need any qualifications to have a child, and giving birth alone doesn't make you an expert - there are lots of very bad parents

Experience teaches people a lot though.
No,you do not need to be a parent to post here.Plenty of people that are not parents have experiences with kids that benefit others on this forum.
Once you are contributing to the thread in a positive way then your input is very welcome.

Gaygooner

I would consider Kindles- (the e reader not the fire) to be extremely child unfriendly

Gaygooner

Moonbeam wrote: »

Experience teaches people a lot though.
No,you do not need to be a parent to post here.Plenty of people that are not parents have experiences with kids that benefit others on this forum.
Once you are contributing to the thread in a positive way then your input is very welcome.

I'm giving my view. I bought my goddaughter an iPad I thought I could offer my experience. I'll leave ye to it.

ted1

drunkmonkey wrote: »

She needs to get her head around educational apps for her children's sake.

That's not the issue, a 50 euro tablet will offer the same apps.
Actually an android will offer more apps for free.

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

If he asked for it, then the kid doesn't know the difference between and iPad running iOS or a basic tablet for any version of android , so more the fool the god father is

Or maybe he appreciates the closed system and the reduced chances of downloading rogue apps???

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

That's not the issue, a 50 euro tablet will offer the same apps.
Actually an android will offer more apps for free.

Quality not quantity

wolfpawnat

Gaygooner wrote: »

I sense a bit of green eyed monster here

No, I am angered at

1 the blatant differences between the gifts between my children
2 the lack of my partner and I being informed of such gifts because they are too extravagant for santa and mommy and daddy to compete with
3 the fact there are very good, and more child orientated tablets out there suitable for a 6 year old. You seem to equate my saying I don't want him to have an ipad with I don't want him having a tablet, that is false, I rather him have something worth more than our month's rent when there are great alternatives on the market that are more durable, please get that into your head.

We do not care if he gets a gift that we cannot afford, we embrace being given help when we are struggling, but it is what I feel is an overly extravagant gift for the situation at hand is the issue. Would I like him to have a tablet, yes, would I like it to be one I feel is too expensive for him personally, definitely not. There is a difference.

DivingDuck wrote: »

You have a few options here:

1. Thank the godfather and accept the gift.
2. Thank the godfather, return the gift as it doesn't suit your circumstances and parenting choices, and ask him to exchange it for something else.
3. Thank the godfather, sell the gift, and use it to buy what you consider to be suitable items for both children.

I personally would go for option one, but I'm not you and it's not my child. You are quite wrong about the intended and actual market for iPads, but that doesn't mean you have to allow your child to have one if you don't feel it's appropriate. You could explain to the godfather that you don't want to create a situation where one child gets better presents than the other-- I'm assuming the other child's godparents aren't such generous gift-givers? (Unless it's the same guy, and he's playing favourites, it's not really his fault, but you can still explain the situation to him.)

If you really don't want the child to have the iPad but don't feel you can broach this topic with the godfather, you could always sell it, redistribute the funds between the children, and then tell the godfather that your son "lost" his iPad. That would put paid to further expensive gifts, I'm betting. It's a bit underhand, but if you really think he would take it poorly and really can't stomach the thought of the boy having the tablet, it's an option.

My sons godfather is a wealthier man than my daughter's godparents, they will get her a gift each as well, but her godfather gets her a dress and her godmother gets them both the same thing because she wants to be fair. They cannot compete for one second with something as extravagant as a ipad. so to me it is horrifically unfair and I wish for my children to be somewhat level. I am no fool they will not be exactly level, but a bit either way on the scales of fair is okay.

The Sun King

Go somewhere with free wifi (plenty of options). Download apps etc. Disable internet while at home.

Easy.

unkel

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Well would me not knowing who has them tell you what sort of state our finances are in

Poverty is not an excuse for ignorance in this day and age. Access to information is free and you said you have internet access

You need to think long and hard about yourself and your family. Do you want your children to grow up being severely limited in their opportunities and / or be poor like yourself?

Sounds very harsh, but I mean you and your family well. Happy Christmas.

ted1

Gaygooner wrote: »

I would consider Kindles- (the e reader not the fire) to be extremely child unfriendly

Yep but the fire kids tablets which are designed for kids are very good.

0ph0rce0

Another thing to consider is the god father probably isn't a tech man himself. They way apple advertise you'd think it's the only decent tablet on the market so he bought what he thought was best and maybe not clued up on the mid range stuff that's just as good.

For me i dont see the problem. Its a once off gift and a nice one at that. Myself I'd rather pay an extra 100 quid or so on a good tablet that will be used for years to come than a load of toys that clutter up the house and never get played with again after Christmas day

Gaygooner

Ask him to get an Amazon Fire so

Moonbeam

Gaygooner wrote: »

I would consider Kindles- (the e reader not the fire) to be extremely child unfriendly

So would I but she is 6 and well able to use mine and I kind of want a chance to use mine too:)

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

Yep but the fire kids tablets which are designed for kids are very good.

Well Kindle had been dropped from the name its Amazon Fire

Moonbeam

ted1 wrote: »

Yep but the fire kids tablets which are designed for kids are very good.

are they not just the normal ones with rugged cases?

Gaygooner

Moonbeam wrote: »

So would I but she is 6 and well able to use mine and I kind of want a chance to use mine too:)

Is it a fire or just an e reader???

ted1

Gaygooner wrote: »

Quality not quantity

Haha there's your inexperience shining through again. Kids are vandals.

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

Haha there's your inexperience shining through again. Kids are vandals.

Again. Kid proof cases!!!

The Sun King

Why even tell the kid that it's his?

Why not say "Uncle Eddy bought this for everyone to play on, so share blah blah blah"?

BreadnBuddha

Madness, the OP has already explained why they, as a parent, don't want their 6 year old having such an expensive gift.

They said that they're using a 9 year old laptop and a USB dongle as their finances are tight at the moment (that will get better in time OP)

The real clue, for everyone, is that finances are tight enough that priority is on a present from Santa, but doesn't stretch much further than that.

Yet people suggest taking broadband subscriptions, buying Otterbox cases, Tempered glass screen protectors and the likes....

Jesus wept.

OP, you're no doubt a fine parent and know yourself how best to raise your kids. I wouldn't second guess yourself on this. Do what you think is right for your son and daughter.

And Happy Christmas to you and yours.

Gaygooner

I didn't get the iPad and expect the parents to get the case. I got it so she could use it straight away.

Mourinho

unkel wrote: »

Do you want your children to grow up being severely limited in their opportunities and / or be poor like yourself?.

Has to be one of the biggest posts I've ever read on here Jesus Christ, absolutely disgusting.

ted1

Gaygooner wrote: »

But as I haven't fertilised any eggs my opinion should be discounted???

This isn't the LGBT forum where you might get more of a response from a silly statement as that

We are talking about parents be they adoptive or biological.

Moonbeam

Gaygooner wrote: »

Is it a fire or just an e reader???

The e-reader.
I let them use our laptops and tablets imo they are too young for their own yet.

Gaygooner

ted1 wrote: »

This isn't the LGBT forum where you might get more of a response from a silly statement as that

We are talking about parents be they adoptive or biological.

So if I adopted a child I can partake???

I don't post in the lgbt forum tbf

Dodge

I think you're over thinking it. You say a tablet is fine but you don't want an iPad. No 6 year old knows the difference between the most expensive and least expensive tablet. Maybe have a word with the godfather about it being too extravagant but no harm will come from letting the present go to the kid.

As for 'get kids toys instead of technology'; it's laughable. Kids like to play games and watch cartoons. The medium is completely immaterial. Not to mention that they're expected to use computers and tablets at home for things like 'mathletics' and more and more coming down the line

Moonbeam

I am not sure if it is the time of day that is causing such posts but please keep this thread on topic.
The OP asked a question and for the most part is getting good constructive answers but please refrain from insulting them or suggesting that they want anything but the best for their children.

DivingDuck

wolfpawnat wrote: »

My sons godfather is a wealthier man than my daughter's godparents, they will get her a gift each as well, but her godfather gets her a dress and her godmother gets them both the same thing because she wants to be fair. They cannot compete for one second with something as extravagant as a ipad. so to me it is horrifically unfair and I wish for my children to be somewhat level. I am no fool they will not be exactly level, but a bit either way on the scales of fair is okay.

To be fair, you chose your children's godparents, so the fact that there's a financial disparity between them is not your son's godfather's fault.

To avoid this in future, you are going to need to set limits on how much the godparents can spend on the children. Explain that this is because you don't want the children to grow up feeling resentment over being treated differently. In my family, it always went that a child's godparent was closer/more generous with their own godchild, so in my view, your daughter's godmother should not be trying to split her budget between her and your son. It might make sense to allow both godparents to focus on their godchildren, but in the interest of fairness, you could set them the same price limit. Would that be something you would consider?

If you don't explain your perspective to the godfather one way or another, he's going to keep doing things like this, which doesn't help anyone. I personally don't agree with your position entirely, but your son is your son, and as he's so young, it is your right to set the limits you feel are reasonable. The godfather is going to need to accept that if he wants to be a part of the child's life, whether he agrees with them or not.

ted1

unkel wrote: »

Poverty is not an excuse for ignorance in this day and age. Access to information is free and you said you have internet access

You need to think long and hard about yourself and your family. Do you want your children to grow up being severely limited in their opportunities and / or be poor like yourself?

Sounds very harsh, but I mean you and your family well. Happy Christmas.

People where able to study for PHDs long before the Internet and indeed many say the standards of students was better when they actually had to use library's and journals
Rather than googling anything they want, there's a hell of skit of misinformation available on the web.

GeneHunt

Before you send the ipad back, do some research on the benefits it could do for both your kids - there are some very good apps you can get for it, but limit the screen time. I would consider not telling you son that it's his, but from Santa to both your children or to the whole family. Run it past the godfather too.

There was report I saw on the BBC Click (technology programme on BBC News channel) a few months ago - where kids (about 5) in very poor parts of Africa got ipads for school work (funded by an American company), it was noticed that the kids learned there lessons much quicker. From this a study is currently going in the UK with UK kids about 5 yrs old. Teachers interviewed said (after 2 weeks i think it was) the kids with ipads were 6 weeks ahead of the school education program.

ted1

GeneHunt wrote: »

Before you send the ipad back, do some research on the benefits it could do for both your kids - there are some very good apps you can get for it, but limit the screen time. I would consider not telling you son that it's his, but from Santa to both your children or to the whole family. Run it past the godfather too.

There was report I saw on the BBC Click (technology programme on BBC News channel) a few months ago - where kids (about 5) in very poor parts of Africa got ipads for school work (funded by an American company), it was noticed that the kids learned there lessons much quicker. From this a study is currently going in the UK with UK kids about 5 yrs old. Teachers interviewed said (after 2 weeks i think it was) the kids with ipads were 6 weeks ahead of the school education program.

6 weeks ahead of who? Kids with no tablets or kids with cheaper tablets.

delly

I think there are a lot of off-shoot points here, but it essentially boils down to the OP asking if they are irrational or not to be annoyed at getting such a gift.

I don't think your irrational OP, but some of your arguments are weak. Starting with paying for games and internet connectivity, or lack of it. Both are not a big deal because there are a tonne of games out there that do not have to be paid for. My 8 year old has had a tablet since 5, and in that time has only had two paid for games (Minecraft and Terreria). Even these have free versions out there. If you have a list of games to get, just wait until you are in a free wifi spot and download them. You don't need internet to play most of them.

Regarding sharing with the younger child, I hear you on your complications, but is this the child's fault? I don't want to sound harsh here, but you are going to let both your children miss out as you have not been able to put in a policy of acceptable sharing. I know it's easier said than done, but the generous godfather gets grief for buying a nice gift, but the MIL and her policy of creating a negativity of sharing wins out.

Regarding breakage, a fair point, but at least you do have the case. It will come at some stage that you have a delicate and/or expensive item for him as he gets older. He has to learn some time, it may as well be with something that you didn't pay for. My now 8 year old daughter has had a DS since 4, recently upgraded to a 3DS. Never had an issue with damage or breakage, she understands that if she didn't respect it, it would be her that loses out. I have a long history of gaming, so she is used to seeing me play since a toddler, so it isn't seen as anything out of the ordinary.

As regards the godfather paying out on such an expensive present, yes, this probably shouldn't have happened without asking you first. I'm sure it was done with good intent however, I can maybe presume the godfather doesn't have kids. Rather than knocking back the gift, maybe taking some time out to explain how it may not be appropriate and your concerns would put him on the right path for the future.

wolfpawnat

drunkmonkey wrote: »

You can share your internet connection with the iPad your already paying for, and you will be using this more than any of them, you really should get your head around this, it will be a benefit to you and the kids.

I know how broadband works, and I also know how data allowances work. I cannot afford an increase in internet costs at present.

Mourinho wrote: »

It's tough cause you can't really give it back without causing offence and I must say its great to see a god parent so involved, majority I've ever known it's just a title and they barely even spend time with the child.

An iPad is more a personal device now for all sorts it's not professional really anymore, kids to the elderly use them for lots of stuff! You may be thinking of the iPad Pro which is aimed at business.

If your download limit via the dongle is very low do you have a family member or friend who you could call into for an half hour for tea and download them? Or maybe is there a place near you like Starbucks, Costa Cofee or a MacDonalds that give free wifi?

Yes tho I would agree that it should be shared with his sister. I know it's for him and if the god father says anything just say in a friendly way your teaching him to share and you don't want the 2 year old to feel left out, frankly I can't see any reasonable person objecting to that.

We are very grateful and delighted at his contribution to his godson, we know how much it means to him too to have chosen, and we know he only does these things because he wants the best for the small man.

But the issue here stretches further than the Godfather, to the grandmother, who insists on treating my children as differently as possible to the advantage of the 6yo, and that is where the sharing would be an issue, a look at my posts about the woman on here tell you of her horrid nature and the issues that would arise.

BreadnBuddha wrote: »

Jaysus lads, would you lay off the OP.

A 6 year old boy should be given toys, not technology. Lego would have been a better choice.

The level of expenditure is embarrassing, for the giver. The parents shouldn't be embarrassed for a moment, and the OP is right to think that it's totally nuts to have a little boy own such a device when they're having to watch their pennies everywhere else.

The Godparent should have told the boy that he had a present already, bought him and his little sister a toy each and put a few quid in a card towards some christmas clobber or Santas parcel.

What he did was plain wrong.

That is the problem, he already gave him 150e for his savings. A bit of lego would have done to show that he is godfather, so a little something extra, or as I have stated, a tablet for children!

0ph0rce0 wrote: »

My 6 year old has an ipad, I bought an older generation second hand but she loves it.

Obviously she's not on it all day and night. But comes in handy for the rainy days where she can't go out and play and jump in the muck.

Great when your travelling too. For movies and what not.

When she's not using one of the family always picks it up to browse on, read on, watch TV, listen to music.

I find it very hard to believe you and your husband won't get any use out of it because "it's his only" I guarentee you'll be on it more the the child :-)

Great present in my opinion

In no way would he ever be allowed it in the car. His sister would have to watch him on it from the other side of the vehicle. That is a form of torture IMO. And his father and I don't agree with such things in the car personally, it is just something we prefer not to have.

theteal wrote: »

Any tablet would be good for a 6 yr old. The ipad is overkill but people fall for the marketing so what can you do? OP, it's a nice gift, I think you need to look beyond the cost of it and just see it as a gift. A tablet is a tablet to kids that age. I think you're looking too much into the potential jealousy aspect.

I really think it is not fair one child is so vastly treated better than another. She will get jealous, I know my children, and what can I do? I cannot get her one to make up the discrepancy.

Gaygooner wrote: »

It was frank not mean spirited - I got from her tone that they felt they child shouldn't have nice things if they don't have them

You clearly did not read my post properly then, otherwise you would have seen it was nothing to do with me, but of the over extravagance of that particular product, not the idea of a tablet as a whole

Del2005 wrote: »

Did the 6 year old ask his Godfather for get it? You can't really blame him for getting something that was requested.

The only good thing is that because you have no Internet he'll be sick of it in 10 minutes so the chances of it being broken are low.

That sickens me more, to think something so expensive left to waste. As for him asking for it and the man getting it. He should have called us. I mean, if he had asked for a Gibson guitar, should he have bought that?

drunkmonkey wrote: »

She needs to get her head around educational apps for her children's sake.

Wall, head, bang, repeat. Read my posts, I have no issues with tablets and childrens apps, I have an issue with the particular tablet being so damn expensive. How is this not getting into some peoples heads? I am okay with him having a durable and realistically priced tablet.

The Sun King

ted1 wrote: »

People where able to study for PHDs long before the Internet and indeed many say the standards of students was better when they actually had to use library's and journals
Rather than googling anything they want, there's a hell of skit of misinformation available on the web.

Study still requires the use of journals and articles. You are beat over the head about not using d'internet. Backed up by software that reads your essay for any unreferenced work from all sources, online or otherwise, I'm not sure where you got that idea.

coolbeans

Gaygooner wrote: »

It was frank not mean spirited - I got from her tone that they felt they child shouldn't have nice things if they don't have them

I think it's evident and understandable why giving an ipad to 6 year old as a Christmas present is inappropriate and ill advised given the regrettably tight financial situation the parents find themselves in. Imagine trying to manage expectations with the kids in the lead up to Christmas and then having the admittedly well ntentioned godfather scupper things at the last minute. Not to mind the growing evidence that giving ipads and the like to kids at that age could be a factor in declining attention spans.

But no, according to you the OP is just well jel.

Whyohwhy?

unkel wrote: »

LOL, will you join us in the real world?

iPads are really nice toys for kids, they are pretty obsolete for business professionals at this stage

Go and thank the godfather of your child for giving him such a generous gift!

And do yourself and your kid a favour and get broadband in your house. You seem to live in the 1980s?

Really? Not everyone can get broadband or afford it.
My only access to the Internet is through my phone. 20 quid a month.
The Internet wasn't a thing in the 80's BTW, it was only getting useful around the very late 90's ffs . and it was sh¡the up until the about ten years ago, you must be in yer early 20's to be thinking that.

An ipad, for a 6 year old is a bit much imo.
€100 android tablet does the same job...

unkel

GeneHunt wrote: »

Before you send the ipad back, do some research on the benefits it could do for both your kids - there are some very good apps you can get for it, but limit the screen time. I would consider not telling you son that it's his, but from Santa to both your children or to the whole family. Run it past the godfather too.

There was report I saw on the BBC Click (technology programme on BBC News channel) a few months ago - where kids (about 5) in very poor parts of Africa got ipads for school work (funded by an American company), it was noticed that the kids learned there lessons much quicker. From this a study is currently going in the UK with UK kids about 5 yrs old. Teachers interviewed said (after 2 weeks i think it was) the kids with ipads were 6 weeks ahead of the school education program.

That's pretty much the point I was trying to make, GeneHunt.

Deus ex machina giving the kid a modern tool (that his parents could never afford to give him) and the kid progresses and benefits. Isn't this all pretty obvious? If I were that parent in poor parts of Africa (or the OP) I would just be grateful for the gift and do whatever I could to support my kids progress.

And for the record, I don't like iPads. I think they are ridiculously overpriced and I think you can get an equally good tablet for about a quarter of the price.

Gaygooner

It doesn't.

I think the OP needs to Think Differently.

Ask him to get him an Amazon Fire as a compromise

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

The Sun King

I'm imagining this as the godfather walking in and dropping this thing very specifically into the kids lap.

Why not have a word, say thanks for the gift, you've given him saving money already, but we have some concerns. Would you mind if we just popped it under the tree for the two of them from Santa?

Use free wifi to download, and say no more.

deisemum

OP most 6 and 2 years old have no concept of the price of toys or gadgets they just see something they like not the value. They wont be like you looking at the cost of something, that's your issue not theirs.

Is the 6 year old's godfather also the 2 year old's godfather? I've been working with children for nearly 2 decades and I've got 24 or 26 nieces plus friends with children and from what I've observed and also do is spend more on a godchild than on thegodchild's sibling. It seems to be fairly standard practice.

While as a parent it's your decision what you allow your children to have at least you should do so being fully informed about the gifts and their uses I think your reaction is irrational but I think basic manners and being gracious in accepting a gift is important. I think it's extremely rude and controlling to expect family and friends to consult you about what they buy your children.

I think most people have at some stage in their lives been given gifts that may have been cheap or expensive that might not be what they want or even like but most have the good manners to smile and thank the giver.

The Sun King

I'm sure the godfather would be more than happy to forego recognition, especially if it's causing understandable problems.

Moonbeam

I think that you have all given the OP a lot to think about.
I am now closing this thread due to the amount of reported posts.
I will consider re-opening it tomorrow if the OP wants me to.

ted1

Moonbeam wrote: »

are they not just the normal ones with rugged cases?

Yes and no, they come with a rugged case but also a 2 year no question asked guarantee. But more importantly they also come with a modified OS that also includes a years free prime kids membership which include loads of films , apps and programs.
The OS is simplified for kids and enables parental restrictions

Whyohwhy?

unkel wrote: »

That's pretty much the point I was trying to make, GeneHunt.

Deus ex machina giving the kid a modern tool (that his parents could never afford to give him) and the kid progresses and benefits. Isn't this all pretty obvious? If I were that parent in poor parts of Africa (or the OP) I would just be grateful for the gift and do whatever I could to support my kids progress.

And for the record, I don't like iPads. I think they are ridiculously overpriced and I think you can get an equally good tablet for about a quarter of the price.

I also hate apple products, but to say that they could never afford to get the kid one is silly.
They most likely have more sense not to spend €400\600 on one for a child, when something that'll do the same tricks(for a 6 year old) can be got for a fraction if the cost.

Not everyone gets broadband coverage that's great, not all can afford it either.

The 80`s,internet?!? Stop messing ffs...

wolfpawnat

The Sun King wrote: »

Go somewhere with free wifi (plenty of options). Download apps etc. Disable internet while at home.

I live in the back arse of nowhere, not very many options.

unkel wrote: »

Poverty is not an excuse for ignorance in this day and age. Access to information is free and you said you have internet access

You need to think long and hard about yourself and your family. Do you want your children to grow up being severely limited in their opportunities and / or be poor like yourself?

Sounds very harsh, but I mean you and your family well. Happy Christmas.

....I assume the fact it is 2:30 in the morning is why you would think to write something like this. "Be Poor like myself?" Lack of knowledge of the latest things I have no interest in is not why I am currently financially struggling, but thank you for the rude comment. I am not saying I do not want my child to have a tablet, but that I do not wish for him to have the top of the parket, too expensive one.

BreadnBuddha wrote: »

Madness, the OP has already explained why they, as a parent, don't want their 6 year old having such an expensive gift.

They said that they're using a 9 year old laptop and a USB dongle as their finances are tight at the moment (that will get better in time OP)

The real clue, for everyone, is that finances are tight enough that priority is on a present from Santa, but doesn't stretch much further than that.

Yet people suggest taking broadband subscriptions, buying Otterbox cases, Tempered glass screen protectors and the likes....

Jesus wept.

OP, you're no doubt a fine parent and know yourself how best to raise your kids. I wouldn't second guess yourself on this. Do what you think is right for your son and daughter.

And Happy Christmas to you and yours.

Thank you. I am not looking for people to side with me in all aspects, but more for people to give advice. I feel like you actually read my OP, rather than focused on one aspect of it.

DivingDuck wrote: »

To be fair, you chose your children's godparents, so the fact that there's a financial disparity between them is not your son's godfather's fault.

If you don't explain your perspective to the godfather one way or another, he's going to keep doing things like this, which doesn't help anyone. I personally don't agree with your position entirely, but your son is your son, and as he's so young, it is your right to set the limits you feel are reasonable. The godfather is going to need to accept that if he wants to be a part of the child's life, whether he agrees with them or not.

I am aware that when I chose his godfather, he was a wealthier family member, but I always told all the Godparents never to go too mad, and this is the definition of such. I know his heart is in the right place, but sadly, that does not make what he did right.

delly wrote: »

I think there are a lot of off-shoot points here, but it essentially boils down to the OP asking if they are irrational or not to be annoyed at getting such a gift.

I don't think your irrational OP, but some of your arguments are weak. Starting with paying for games and internet connectivity, or lack of it. Both are not a big deal because there are a tonne of games out there that do not have to be paid for. My 8 year old has had a tablet since 5, and in that time has only had two paid for games (Minecraft and Terreria). Even these have free versions out there. If you have a list of games to get, just wait until you are in a free wifi spot and download them. You don't need internet to play most of them.

Regarding sharing with the younger child, I hear you on your complications, but is this the child's fault? I don't want to sound harsh here, but you are going to let both your children miss out as you have not been able to put in a policy of acceptable sharing. I know it's easier said than done, but the generous godfather gets grief for buying a nice gift, but the MIL and her policy of creating a negativity of sharing wins out.

Regarding breakage, a fair point, but at least you do have the case. It will come at some stage that you have a delicate and/or expensive item for him as he gets older. He has to learn some time, it may as well be with something that you didn't pay for. My now 8 year old daughter has had a DS since 4, recently upgraded to a 3DS. Never had an issue with damage or breakage, she understands that if she didn't respect it, it would be her that loses out. I have a long history of gaming, so she is used to seeing me play since a toddler, so it isn't seen as anything out of the ordinary.

As regards the godfather paying out on such an expensive present, yes, this probably shouldn't have happened without asking you first. I'm sure it was done with good intent however, I can maybe presume the godfather doesn't have kids. Rather than knocking back the gift, maybe taking some time out to explain how it may not be appropriate and your concerns would put him on the right path for the future.

As I stated already, I do not want him to miss out, I wish for the Godfather to get a cheaper, less overpriced alternative.

Gaygooner wrote: »

It doesn't.

I think the OP needs to Think Differently.

Ask him to get him an Amazon Fire as a compromise

You see, this is the thing I have been trying to discuss and you have gone off on some tangent on. It is not about him not having a tablet, but a ridiculously priced one and for it to be done without our consultation. We wish for him to return the gift and get something more suitable, and if he wishes for that to be a tablet, then by all means, he should get it, but something that is aimed at children that I do not have to give over a months rent to cases and the like so that my son can enjoy it for more than 20 minutes.

DivingDuck

deisemum wrote: »

I think it's extremely rude and controlling to expect family and friends to consult you about what they buy your children.

Really? Do most people feel this way?

I know one family who won't allow any weapon-based toys in the house, and have requested that they not receive any of same as presents. Another family has asked that no more Lego be bought as the kids were big fans when they were little and they ended up with a house full of it and had all they could possibly ever want. I also know a girl who is really passionate about feminist issues and has requested that nobody give her kids Barbies, Bratz, etc. Another family is extremely strict about what is "age appropriate" and will only allow her kids to play with toys that are aimed at a year or two below their actual age, e.g., her ten year old isn't allowed to watch PG movies, only G movies, and will not allow them to have presents that go against this rule.

I've never had a problem with any of this. Nobody else I know has issues with it, either. I don't agree with a lot of it (especially the last one!) but they're not my children, so I respect their wishes. I really don't think it's a lot to ask.