How to react when parent text you when to leave the country while leaving?

vg88

Hello,

I hope I posted this in the right forum, I just want peoples opinion.

I'm 21 and in final year college so this is playing on my mind. My father texted me last week he was getting the boat over to England to get a job while he was on the boat. He never mentioned anything to me before.

I thought we were close, but my brother and sister don't speak to him. It was just very unsuspected. When I told my mum (they're split for 10 years) she flipped. She was angry as it was 2 days before my final exam. It's been a week since he left and I haven't heard anything.

I know he's not happy in Dublin, although he had a good job and good family and firends, and I think he may have just wanted a fresh start.

I was wondering should I be angry at him or be happy he's trying to start something fresh for himself?

mordeith

While I don't agree with with way he communicated it, he's a grown man, so for now I wouldn't worry about. Get your exams sorted and then talk to your Dad. He's not a million miles away in England.

While the timing was a bit off, at least he told you. He obviously was thinking of you at the time. Wish him well. Life's too short for bitterness. It'll get you nowhere. Life can throw sh1te at you at difficult times. It's how you handle it will make you grow strong.
Good Luck to you both.

moloner4

moloner4 wrote: »

.....

I'm 21 ...........

I was wondering should I be angry at him or be happy he's trying to start something fresh for himself?

I don't have kids and my parents were together until my Mum passed away so I can't offer advice based on a similar experience.

However, it is worth remembering that your Dad is simply a guy making his way through life as best he can, he has 3 kids and 2 of them don't speak to him & he's split from their Mum, plenty there to be less than happy about from his point of view.

Maybe in a while he'll regret how he communicated the England thing to you, no one's perfect. As he headed off for a fresh start despite having a job and friends etc maybe he's not as happy as you thought he was.

You mention you thought ye were close, he probably thinks so too. You can take control of this and keep in touch with him, ask him how's he getting on etc and that you miss him. You obviously do, will be music to his ears I imagine

Best of luck with your last year in college.

vg88

Thanks all for the advice, I won't be making any plans until after my exams but I think the advise is best hear to stay in good terms

moloner4

moloner4 wrote: »

.......... stay in good terms

Most definitely.