The Cooking Irritations thread

anothernight

confusticated wrote: »

This particularly annoys me with eggs. First off, those dates are usually best before, not use by, and second, they're a guideline! I regularly eat eggs that are a week or two beyond best before and they're absolutely grand.

I once had a flatmate who would be so paranoid about milk going off that she'd get rid of it a few days after buying it, well before the best before date....


This one is more food photography/presentation than cooking but...
When drinks are presented dripping down the sides of the glass. Like these examples. I don't want sticky fingers!

CyrilFiggis

nkav86 wrote: »

Hate the word 'flavourful', it sounds ridiculous and the Americans use it every 2 seconds!

Or 'healthful' >.<

Cakerbaker

Chocolate biscuit cake ...... Melting chocolate and adding in biscuits, nuts and sweets does not count as baking in my eyes. It's only a small step up from a Rice Krispie bun!

keane2097

Cakerbaker wrote: »

Chocolate biscuit cake ...... Melting chocolate and adding in biscuits, nuts and sweets does not count as baking in my eyes. It's only a small step up from a Rice Krispie bun!

Not very healthful either.

Speedwell

Cakerbaker wrote: »

Chocolate biscuit cake ...... Melting chocolate and adding in biscuits, nuts and sweets does not count as baking in my eyes. It's only a small step up from a Rice Krispie bun!

A Romanian friend taught me how to do this and called it "salami cake". It's meant to be frugal and use up leftovers, not to be fine dining made from scratch, but it's comforting and homey and well-beloved. Here's an Internet recipe: https://pickthecook.wordpress.com/2015/05/05/romanian-biscuit-salami-salam-de-biscuiti/

squonk

Zaph wrote: »

Say what you like about Guy Fieri, but I've eaten in one of his restaurants and I would certainly give considerable thought to matricide for another rack of the ribs there.

I'd say he can cook alright and I suspect I'd like his stuff quite a lot but 6 years watching Triple D have made him grate on me now a little.

squonk

Watching Diners Drive-Ins and Dives where a place makes something beautiful by leaving it in the oven cooking low and slow til it's fall apart yummy and then, straight away, dumps it onto the flat top or deep frier to crisp it up! Arrrggghhhhh! COME ON!!!

Dial Hard

squonk wrote: »

I'd say he can cook alright and I suspect I'd like his stuff quite a lot but 6 years watching Triple D have made him grate on me now a little.

6 years of watching Triple D makes me wonder how he has a hair or a scrap of skin left on his head from the bleach...

MissFlitworth

Rembering the line of the recipe that goes 'add a tablespoon or two of the pasta water to...' just as you've tilted the pot past the point of no return over the colander. Bye bye, pasta water, bye bye.

Dial Hard

I hate when chefs lie to me.

Whacking the back of a cut pomegranate with a wooden spoon achieves nothing more than Jackson Pollocking your kitchen with virulently vermilion juice while the seeds remain firmly attached.

Taboola

Dial Hard wrote: »

I hate when chefs lie to me.

Whacking the back of a cut pomegranate with a wooden spoon achieves nothing more than Jackson Pollocking your kitchen with virulently vermilion juice while the seeds remain firmly attached.

Same with the garlic in a lunch box thing. (If you shake it around it peels the garlic). That has NEVER worked for me.

Not sure if it's been mentioned or not but my irritation is people lashing salt and pepper on their food before even tasting it. I purposely don't keep salt and pepper on the table for this reason.

Keane2baMused

keane2097 wrote: »

Not very healthful either.

Im not sure it's meant to be :-)

Tree

Recipes that claim to taste exactly like "healthy" versions of the "real thing". Some spray oil and baking really can never replicate the taste of deep fried things.

fussyonion

Tree wrote: »

Recipes that claim to taste exactly like "healthy" versions of the "real thing". Some spray oil and baking really can never replicate the taste of deep fried things.

I saw a recipe where someone made their own roast potatoes using that vile Frylight spray oil.
She put the RAW potatoes on a tray, spritzed them with Frylight and roasted them for an hour.
They came out looking as dry and wrinkly as a testicle.
She could have at least par-boiled the things before putting oil on them.

The spuds, not the testicles.

nkav86

fussyonion wrote:

I saw a recipe where someone made their own roast potatoes using that vile Frylight spray oil. She put the RAW potatoes on a tray, spritzed them with Frylight and roasted them for an hour. They came out looking as dry and wrinkly as a testicle. She could have at least par-boiled the things before putting oil on them.

Me arse! If you're gonna indulge in a roast potato ya gotta do it right! That spray stuff really bothers me

kurtainsider

While making chicken stock - pouring it into the colander over the sink before realizing (too late) that it was the liquid you wanted to keep.

Dial Hard

fussyonion wrote:

I saw a recipe where someone made their own roast potatoes using that vile Frylight spray oil. She put the RAW potatoes on a tray, spritzed them with Frylight and roasted them for an hour. They came out looking as dry and wrinkly as a testicle. She could have at least par-boiled the things before putting oil on them.

The spuds, not the testicles.

Post of the thread so far.

Gloomtastic!

Confession time: I used to roast my potatoes in a shallow bath of oil. But, for health reasons, switched to an oil spray - until my spray bottle bunged up. Now, after I've drained my par-boiled spuds and return the pot to the hob to dry them out, I add a quick splash of oil, cover the pot and shake vigorously to coat the spuds in oil and break the skin. Transfer to a baking tray, sprinkle with salt and stick in a hot (200c+) until browned.
So, in my opinion, the secret to good roasties is par-boiling then shaking and not oil.

Please carry on..... :rolleyes:

Dial Hard

Neven, it's paprika. Not "papareeka". Just stop already.

dee_mc

Dial Hard wrote: »

Neven, it's paprika. Not "papareeka". Just stop already.

Does Neven use a lot of 'curry-ander' too or is that someone else?

Gloomtastic!

It might just be the Caaaavaaaan accent...... :rolleyes:

SB_Part2

My mother says "Gee-johns" instead of goujons. It's highly mortifying.

Malari

SB_Part2 wrote: »

My mother says "Gee-johns" instead of goujons. It's highly mortifying.

LOL! I've a friend who calls them "gudge-ons"

IvyTheTerrible

Goujon bothers me because it's a French word but in France it ONLY refers to a type of fish. No chicken involved at all.

Jambons is another one that gets me.

Thud

The overuse of the comment "cooked to perfection" on cooking shows.

These sort of comments on recipe sites:
http://the-toast.net/2014/09/04/eighteen-kinds-people-comment-recipe-blog/

Dial Hard

SB_Part2 wrote: »

My mother says "Gee-johns" instead of goujons. It's highly mortifying.

My sister's colleague once asked for "One of those punani things" in O'Brien's.

Loire

MissFlitworth wrote: »

Rembering the line of the recipe that goes 'add a tablespoon or two of the pasta water to...' just as you've tilted the pot past the point of no return over the colander. Bye bye, pasta water, bye bye.

I LOL'd - happens to me all the time. Even worse when Mrs. Loire opines that " a little of that pasta water would have been great" when she can't even fry an egg :eek:

Loire

Cooking programs like Masterchef where they keep saying that the dish is ok but it needs more seasoning. Every show. Only a matter of time when someone arrives with a sack of Saxo over his shoulder.

SlinkyDog

Quick and easy Simple recipe!

All you need is
potaoes!
Mince!
Chopped tomatoes!
Essence of coconut!
Jerusalem artichokes!
Butternut squash!

Ya Jamie Oliver let me just fly down to the topaz and pick that up fekin plonker ya!

Ruby31

On cookery shows when they leave half the mixture in the bowl. What a waste! That's what the spatula was invented for!