Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

One eyed Jack

On thread arguing not tolerated here, if either of ye wish to take it up further i'd suggest original thread

Gremlinertia

Ok we'll draw a line under it at that, that thread is in a different forum, subject to different rules by charter. No further discussion here..

Red F Warrior

*Mod snip - do not ignore on thread warning, last chance, infractions will be handed out if any further mention after this post..

Gremlinertia

I'm doing a bit better today, thanks for all the support last night. I slept terribly but feel better able to get through tonight than last..

Gremlinertia

Bugger, jinxed myself, anxiety ridden again. I made it through yesterday i can do today too. Seven hours left to do..

Tell me how

Gremlinertia wrote:

Bugger, jinxed myself, anxiety ridden again. I made it through yesterday i can do today too. Seven hours left to do..

Nearly through your shift now.
Did it settle?

Gremlinertia

Nah, nearly in tears which isn't very me.. Rolling hard with a mix of misery and nervousness, still here by the fingernails looking at pictures of animals and keeping breath calm.. Will have to bunker once work is over..

veganrun

Feeling a bit stressed/anxious and I'm not sure why. My sleep has not been great recently, mostly because I've been staying up too late. So last night I went to bed early and still woke just after 4am. Probably not helping that the curtains in my room are as thin as toilet paper and don't keep the light out at all.

PMBC

veganrun wrote: »

Feeling a bit stressed/anxious and I'm not sure why. My sleep has not been great recently, mostly because I've been staying up too late. So last night I went to bed early and still woke just after 4am. Probably not helping that the curtains in my room are as thin as toilet paper and don't keep the light out at all.[/QUOTE

Black-out curtains, so.
Birds in tree behind my bedroom start at 4 every morning. Luckily I'm a great sleeper. When that doesn't work I open a book and soon fall asleep again.

snowflaker

Yesterday good day, work wise- things went well. Today- not so good.

Tell me how

snowflaker wrote:

Yesterday good day, work wise- things went well. Today- not so good.

Fingers crossed for tomorrow!

Lady is a tramp

God. I just need to vent.

Last time I was in treatment, I ended up staying in close contact with a member of staff there, a woman who ended up being one of my closest friends. She has absolutely changed my life, I love her to bits. The professional "client" relationship is long over, we're just best friends now and spend a lot of time together and it's just lovely, I've never been so close to someone before.

She's away on holidays, and it's all erupted that everyone thinks me and her are in a relationship. Jesus. This is really bad and it could really affect her professional reputation. I'm just looking back and cringing at the amount of times it probably looked bad if I was leaving her to work at 7.30 in the morning, sure of course it was obvious we'd spent the night together, but there was nothing inappropriate about it. We are friends and I stay in her spare room all of the time.

It's a very close, very involved community. I've been told literally everyone from the top down "knows" about us and is talking about us. I just want to die. My god. How the f*ck do I end up in these sh*tty situations. I can get over the fact they're talking about me like that, but I've possibly just ruined her life because of her misfortune in ever meeting me. F*ck!!!

And I've told her about it and now I think she's p*ssed at me because I've ruined her holiday. It's all a disaster. And now she'll probably never want to speak to me ever again and I'll have lost the one person who always said she'd never not be there ... I hate me.

Tell me how

^^^^^^^^^^^^

Relax Lady. Rumours can be vicious and reacting to them can only throw fuel on the fire.
You and this person know that everything was above board. Do not aim to justify your friendship to anyone.

It can feel like you need to convince people that what they've heard is wrong but it will only serve to bring it even more to their attention.

If your friend calls from holiday, try to be calm and tell her that things are fine and that you hope she's enjoying herself.

Whoever told you "it erupted" and "everyone knows" is only gossiping and I strongly suggest you do not engage in any way to either confirm or deny.

Of course, mine is an unprofessional opinion on this.

Red F Warrior

Calm down Lady. It'll all work out grand and ye will still be good friends. This is a problem that can easily be sorted.

veganrun

Got the curtains which seemed to help. But now I'm stressing about something at work so cue loads of stress and probably very little sleep from now on.

Lady is a tramp

Thanks I'm chilling out a bit now.

It's just hard. Why is it, the very first time in my life I've someone who genuinely loves me and cares about me, people need to go and pour sh*t all over it.

Because I do doubt it, now I do, now that those thoughts have been put there. I'm wondering if it's right or okay etc. And I know it is. My psychiatrist, who has never met my friend and is completely uninvolved and working for a completely unrelated institution, she thinks my friend is a f*cking superhero - there's no such thing as a hopeless case, but my psychiatrist would say that I was pretty much it until this woman stepped into my life. She saved me and I owe her everything.

And now my friend is getting calls from me while she's on holidays, telling her about how her professional reputation is in tatters, and also me being a big needy arsehole looking for reassurance that it's all okay and we're not in a relationship that I don't know about.

Yeah when I actually see it all written down like that. What am I like! I know and she knows that we're only friends, people will talk but it's pure addictive obsessive behaviour on their side. I'm not okay with ANY of it, but the problem isn't with me this time. It's with them.

Mam of 4

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

I'm not okay with ANY of it, but the problem isn't with me this time. It's with them.

This . 100 %.

Glad you're feeling better about it all and are seeing things in a different light , stay positive

Jrop

I'm new to this thread. I've got depression and normally I cope well. But today is a bad day. I'm feeling really weepy and down. I know it will pass.

Lady is a tramp

Jrop wrote: »

I'm new to this thread. I've got depression and normally I cope well. But today is a bad day. I'm feeling really weepy and down. I know it will pass.

Not much I can say, but I'm thinking of you and sending good wishes your way.

Jrop

Thanks Doll. I just needed to get it off my chest. It's also hormone related so I 'm feeling sorry for myself too.

Gee thanks Mother Nature

hank scorpio89

I've been battling with anxiety depression and depersonalization for 5 years and I'm at a low point.I'm on tablets and they help but I've been unemployed for ages now and I really don't think I can work I hate leaving the house.I'm also falling off the wagon into heavy drinking again.it's a nightmare I wish would end people don't undestand.

Jrop

Hank Scorpio are you a man ? If so Men Shed's are really welcoming. They are a great support for men

Gremlinertia

Hey Hank i second the men's shed suggestion, drink is a thing for me too, i can enjoy it but if my mood is bad which it has been on and off lately it's really hard to not drink. Finding places to talk without alcohol is tough but men's shed is a good way to go.. Also i hope you find support here, we are all sorts of ages and many types of issues but we all understand at a basic level the loneliness of mental health problems..

titan18

Hate Friday evenings, everyone on about what they're doing for the weekend and all excited, and i'm dreading it as it's just me and my thoughts. Ive had to retreat to the toilet in work as I could feel tears coming.

Tell me how

titan18 wrote:

Hate Friday evenings, everyone on about what they're doing for the weekend and all excited, and i'm dreading it as it's just me and my thoughts. Ive had to retreat to the toilet in work as I could feel tears coming.

I know exactly what you mean titan18. Your post is scary because it's so familiar.

For a long time, the hardest 2 hours of the week for me used to be between 3 and 5 on a Friday afternoon as everyone else was in good form, winding down and talking about their plans for the weekend. I used to dread it.

Know that it's ok to not have fantastic plans, the thing is, when we are suffering in this way we see everyone else as ecstatic with wonderful lives but truthfully they're just carrying in with mundane things and have their own issues also.

Could you plan anything, however small, that you can tell yourself, "I'm looking forward to that". It could be a walk, a drink, a film, visiting someone, anything that might help you have a positive experience. It's not easy and won't remove all of the dark thoughts but it might lessen them for a period.

For what it's worth, I used to make a cup of tea after everyone had left work, put on a playlist on YouTube and work another 5 or 6 hours, and that approach wasn't neccessarily right either. I lost years in that way.

It's ok to be where you are right now, be kind to yourself any way you can.

titan18

Tell me how wrote: »

I know exactly what you mean titan18. Your post is scary because it's so familiar.

For a long time, the hardest 2 hours of the week for me used to be between 3 and 5 on a Friday afternoon as everyone else was in good form, winding down and talking about their plans for the weekend. I used to dread it.

Know that it's ok to not have fantastic plans, the thing is, when we are suffering in this way we see everyone else as ecstatic with wonderful lives but truthfully they're just carrying in with mundane things and have their own issues also.

Could you plan anything, however small, that you can tell yourself, "I'm looking forward to that". It could be a walk, a drink, a film, visiting someone, anything that might help you have a positive experience. It's not easy and won't remove all of the dark thoughts but it might lessen them for a period.

For what it's worth, I used to make a cup of tea after everyone had left work, put on a playlist on YouTube and work another 5 or 6 hours, and that approach wasn't neccessarily right either. I lost years in that way.

It's ok to be where you are right now, be kind to yourself any way you can.

I'd kill for mundane things tbh. My weekend is a doctor's appointment and then a few days of sitting inside crying to myself cos none of my "friends" have asked me to do anything again.

Doing any of the stuff you suggested will just make me worse as I see others with friends and partners, and I'm just left wondering why can't that be enjoying others company instead of here by myself again.

titan18

titan18 wrote: »

I'd kill for mundane things tbh. My weekend is a doctor's appointment and then a few days of sitting inside crying to myself cos none of my "friends" have asked me to do anything again.

Doing any of the stuff you suggested will just make me worse as I see others with friends and partners, and I'm just left wondering why can't that be enjoying others company instead of here by myself again.

So many people don't have wonderful plans or people to do things with. Remember that what you see can be an illusion and even in others company people can feel terribly lonely.
Don't let other people dictate how you feel about yourself Titan. I do so many things by myself. At one point it was out of necessity and now it is by choice.

We only get one life so enjoy your time and don't concern yourself too much about what others are or aren't doing. Focus on you and what would make you happy.

titan18

Deleted User wrote: »

So many people don't have wonderful plans or people to do things with. Remember that what you see can be an illusion and even in others company people can feel terribly lonely.
Don't let other people dictate how you feel about yourself Titan. I do so many things by myself. At one point it was out of necessity and now it is by choice.

We only get one life so enjoy your time and don't concern yourself too much about what others are or aren't doing. Focus on you and what would make you happy.

I'd be happy with friends and a girlfriend. I sort of need others to be involved for that sadly.

titan18

titan18 wrote: »

I'd be happy with friends and a girlfriend. I sort of need others to be involved for that sadly.

Look after yourself first. Find happiness from little things. Small pieces of positivity. I promise you that nobody can make you happy unless you first do it for yourself.

titan18

Deleted User wrote: »

Look after yourself first. Find happiness from little things. Small pieces of positivity. I promise you that nobody can make you happy unless you first do it for yourself.

Reason I'm unhappy is due to loneliness and isolation though.