Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

titan18

titan18 wrote: »

Reason I'm unhappy is due to loneliness and isolation though.

I can understand that and I know the pain of both those feelings. For me my isolation was self inflicted and the loneliness was present regardless of who I had in my life.

Is there anyone you can turn to? Sometimes just knowing there are people there can help. Little interactions with other people also goes some of the way to feeling less alone. I was waiting on a train earlier and there were two girls dressed to the nines. So of course I asked them where they were going. They were in their very early twenties and so excited. It made me smile

What I have found in my life is that how you view yourself and the world around you will either hold you back or allow you to fully live.

Tell me how

titan18 wrote: »

Reason I'm unhappy is due to loneliness and isolation though.

Several people, myself included, have had experience of wishing that we were not alone or that we had something to do, but when an opportunity to interact with people presented itself, we turned it down.

One time, I was actually in tears because I felt I had nothing to do (again) and was alone (as always), at that moment, a friend rang and yet I couldn't even answer the phone. They texted and asked did I want to meet for a drink and I ignored the text!

I 100% agree with Persepoly on working on ourselves as an absolute priority.

It is very difficult but if you think of it this way, when we meet someone new, what would entice them to want to spend more time with us?

LegacyUser

Hi all.

New here. 29, male, Cork. Fantastic to have a thread like this.

My head is wrecked. I always seem to find a new problem to worry about. Over the years, I have worked myself into a panic thinking all sorts of things. I've gone to the doctor several times because of little bruises that Ive convinced myself were going to be serious problems like cancer. I once got a notion about an illness, looked up the symptoms, somehow found the symptoms in myself, even the pain.... only to go away, get checked my doctor and find that it was all in my head. I would be imagining what it must be like to undergo chemo and die from cancer and I'd have myself convinced that it was going to happen.

Anytime anything happens in my life, even the most boring, normal thing, I'm thinking straight away about the worst possible scenario and playing it out in my head. It's like I won't let myself be happy, like I'm living on borrowed time and eventually some of these bad things are definitely going to happen and ruin my life. A stupid example recently, I was eating fish and I swallowed a small bone. Nothing serious, I just had to drink some water and all was fine. But my head was thinking oh god, I've head of someone dying from choking on a fish bone, I've got to be really careful here.... it's really exhausting!

Other times, I replay mistakes I've made in the past in my head, mistakes and errors of judgement I've made as an adult but also even stupid things that I did when I was 10 or 11 and I start beating myself up over them, the whole how could I have been so stupid kind of thing.

I worry about being alone. I'm scared I'll lose all my friends (not that I have many anyway.... low single figure) or that I'll somehow end up causing my girlfriend pain and hurt someday. We're not even engaged but my head is going through how terrible it would be to get divorced scenarios! The what if thinking is so difficult to get away from.

Even though my mum (who I can talk to about it all, thank God.... I'd be lost without her) tells me not to be worrying about things that aren't going to happen, it builds in my head. She always calms me down with lovely clear logic and I come away after talking to her saying you're so silly to be worrying, she's dead right, live your life and be happy. But then a few hours (if even) of relative peace later and the thoughts come back. It's like I go back to check on them to make sure it's ok to forget them, move on and be happy but it never is for some reason.

And then my head starts to convince me that any rational thinking is just excuse making and I can't get any peace. It's so frustrating!

jsms88

Hi all.

New here. 29, male, Cork. Fantastic to have a thread like this.

My head is wrecked. I always seem to find a new problem to worry about. Over the years, I have worked myself into a panic thinking all sorts of things. I've gone to the doctor several times because of little bruises that Ive convinced myself were going to be serious problems like cancer. I once got a notion about an illness, looked up the symptoms, somehow found the symptoms in myself, even the pain.... only to go away, get checked by my doctor and find that it was all in my head. I would be imagining what it must be like to undergo chemo and die from cancer and I'd have myself convinced that it was going to happen.

Anytime anything happens in my life, even the most boring, normal thing, I'm thinking straight away about the worst possible scenario and playing it out in my head. It's like I won't let myself be happy, like I'm living on borrowed time and eventually some of these bad things are definitely going to happen and ruin my life. A stupid example recently, I was eating fish and I swallowed a small bone. Nothing serious, I just had to drink some water and all was fine. But my head was thinking oh god, I've heard of someone dying from choking on a fish bone, I've got to be really careful here.... it's really exhausting!

Other times, I replay mistakes I've made in the past in my head, mistakes and errors of judgement I've made as an adult but also even stupid things that I did when I was 10 or 11 and I start beating myself up over them, the whole how could I have been so stupid kind of thing.

I worry about being alone. I'm scared I'll lose all my friends (not that I have many anyway.... low single figure) or that I'll somehow end up causing my girlfriend pain and hurt someday. We're not even engaged but my head is going through how terrible it would be to get divorced scenarios! The what if thinking is so difficult to get away from.

Even though my mum (who I can talk to about it all, thank God.... I'd be lost without her) tells me not to be worrying about things that aren't going to happen, it builds in my head. She always calms me down with lovely clear logic and I come away after talking to her saying you're so silly to be worrying, she's dead right, live your life and be happy. But then a few hours (if even) of relative peace later and the thoughts come back. It's like I go back to check on them to make sure it's ok to forget them, move on and be happy but it never is for some reason.

And then my head starts to convince me that any rational thinking is just excuse making and I can't get any peace. It's so frustrating!

Anyway, thanks for listening ☺️

Tell me how

jsms88 wrote:

New here. 29, male, Cork. Fantastic to have a thread like this.

Hi jsms88. Welcome.
Pessimism and anxiety are common traits of a lot of mental health difficulties. Lots post here with similar experiences.

Hugo Stiglitz

Welcome to the thread.

Gremlinertia

Welcome Jsms

titan18

A "friend" is after cutting me off today, says I need to talk to a professional instead of her and she doesn't think she can help me anymore. Don't know what it is but talking to people you consider friends never works out, they always just don't want to deal with it.

Gremlinertia

titan18 wrote: »

A "friend" is after cutting me off today, says I need to talk to a professional instead of her and she doesn't think she can help me anymore. Don't know what it is but talking to people you consider friends never works out, they always just don't want to deal with it.

Some people find it very difficult to hear friends or family are struggling, especially if they've never really dealt with something like what you are facing.. I've a tendency to ask others to stop me if i have gone into something they are uncomfortable with.. I've figured out a few people who would not at all be comfortable and keep in touch moreso in the good times when i can manage..

Mam of 4

titan18 wrote: »

A "friend" is after cutting me off today, says I need to talk to a professional instead of her and she doesn't think she can help me anymore. Don't know what it is but talking to people you consider friends never works out, they always just don't want to deal with it.

I don't know your friends , but some people don't know How to deal with it ?
They might want to help , but may feel afraid in case they say the wrong thing .
If that makes sense .

Shpudnik

Have to go to the first big social event in a long time today and I am really freaking out over it. I've been up all night worrying about it and really don't want to go. I'm in no fit state to go either but I don't have a choice. I don't know if I can face people again after spending the last few weeks pretty much bed bound.

Tell me how

Shpudnik wrote:

Have to go to the first big social event in a long time today and I am really freaking out over it. I've been up all night worrying about it and really don't want to go. I'm in no fit state to go either but I don't have a choice. I don't know if I can face people again after spending the last few weeks pretty much bed bound.

Sorry to hear you're struggling.
Can you break it in to blocks of time or parts of the day and prepare for each accordingly?
Might help identify that the part of the day which is causing you most difficulty is only a small portion of the full day and so it becomes less daunting.

I'm aware it's so much easier to say something than to actually do it.
Hope you get through it Ok.

Shpudnik

Tell me how wrote: »

Sorry to hear you're struggling.
Can you break it in to blocks of time or parts of the day and prepare for each accordingly?
Might help identify that the part of the day which is causing you most difficulty is only a small portion of the full day and so it becomes less daunting.

I'm aware it's so much easier to say something than to actually do it.
Hope you get through it Ok.

I've no way of preparing for it. Its going to be a whole day of things that I don't want to do or am able to do but since I've mo choice I must go.

Shpudnik

DunnoKidz wrote: »

Then, if it were me, in whatever way I could, I would just get through it as easy as I can. It's appropriate to set some healthy boundaries and participate in the easiest way possible, just to get through the day. One of my teachers said once "you don't have to like some things, most times people just muddle thru the shiite as best they can."

I don't think I'll be doing much participation. I'll probably just stay to myself for the day. Its just the way I have to be with these people against my will pretty much is really stressing me out. I'm not good in social situations with people of my own age, especially since I haven't really seen any of my friends for over a month. I'm going from extreme lonliness to being thrown in at the deep end.

DunnoKidz

Shpudnik wrote: »

I don't think I'll be doing much participation. I'll probably just stay to myself for the day. Its just the way I have to be with these people against my will pretty much is really stressing me out. I'm not good in social situations with people of my own age, especially since I haven't really seen any of my friends for over a month. I'm going from extreme lonliness to being thrown in at the deep end.

Mind yourself & just get thru the time in whatever way you can. I am sorry it's so stressful, at such an uneasy time. Be gentle with yourself today... will send comforting thoughts.

Shpudnik

DunnoKidz wrote: »

Mind yourself & just get thru the time in whatever way you can. I am sorry it's so stressful, at such an uneasy time. Be gentle with yourself today... will send comforting thoughts.

Thanks. I'll try.

Gremlinertia

Hey Shpudnik, you'll get through, it's a tired old saying but we've made it through 100% of the days we have tackled so far You'll do mighty

Shpudnik

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hey Shpudnik, you'll get through, it's a tired old saying but we've made it through 100% of the days we have tackled so far You'll do mighty

Can't argue with that.

titan18

Mam of 4 wrote: »

I don't know your friends , but some people don't know How to deal with it ?
They might want to help , but may feel afraid in case they say the wrong thing .
If that makes sense .

Not saying anything is infinitely worse than the wrong thing imo

Mam of 4

titan18 wrote: »

Not saying anything is infinitely worse than the wrong thing imo

I get what you're saying , and I hope they are still your friends titan18.
i was just trying to say that sometimes I don't have the words to help my son , or know what is the right thing to say . i still try though . But maybe your friend felt out of her depth , that's all.

I hope things are good with your friend for you again soon .

jsms88

Why is anxiety/panic my default feeling when I wake up in the morning? It's not like I've even had the time to think about anything upsetting. 😕

crispycrisps

After months and months of hiding my depression and anxiety I came clean to my doctor this week. I don't know what I was expecting when I told her but I didn't think she'd write me a prescription for anti-depressants and send me on my way with no other information.

Now the anti-depressants are making me feel sick and I regret telling the gp anything

Gremlinertia

crispycrisps wrote: »

After months and months of hiding my depression and anxiety I came clean to my doctor this week. I don't know what I was expecting when I told her but I didn't think she'd write me a prescription for anti-depressants and send me on my way with no other information.

Now the anti-depressants are making me feel sick and I regret telling the gp anything

It's early days on your treatment, take your time.. Some meds can cause side effects before they work on you. It's a time to be patient.
Well done on seeing your gp, don't give up yet. It can take a few different meds and such to find your level. A few months of this is well worth it compared to existing for who knows how long in silent misery..
Keep posting here too, you're amongst experienced friends now.

crispycrisps

Thanks for the welcome. The doctor warned me I would feel worse when starting lexapro but the side effects have caught me off guard, headaches, vomiting, dizziness and my eyes are dilated so much, it make me look off my face so its hard to appear to be functioning "normally" in front of colleagues.

inca2

crispycrisps wrote: »

After months and months of hiding my depression and anxiety I came clean to my doctor this week. I don't know what I was expecting when I told her but I didn't think she'd write me a prescription for anti-depressants and send me on my way with no other information.

Now the anti-depressants are making me feel sick and I regret telling the gp anything

Speaking to someone is an incredibly brave step, give yourself a lot of credit for that. Well done. Sadly, your GP could have handled the situation a million times better but that seems to be the norm.

The antidepressants will more than likely make you feel really crappy for a short while - my first ten days were hell. Just stick with them. You need to give them at least two weeks to start to work, four to six weeks to see an improvement and a number of months to hopefully start to feel normal again. If side effects are really unbearable, speak to your GP or pharmacist again. Definitely give them two weeks and see. Not all antidepressants will suit individual people. Sometimes it's a matter of persevering until you settle on something. I'm on treatment just over two months now and I'm finally starting to feel more like myself again. Stick with it, things will get better. Soon you won't regret speaking to your GP. And keep talking, it's so important

caniask86

I am a nightmare lately. Panic is extreme. I have got loads of checks done and health wise seem to be ok but just feel this heaviness in my chest. I honestly feel like I might pass out and my throat gets tight, each time I think Im dying. Does anyone else get this feeling with panic? My stomach feels super full too. Weird i know. I am not looking for heath advice as I have taken myself off to Hospital a few times and all is clear, so has to be the head.

Anxiety is torture.

Gremlinertia

I am sitting here with all you describe, the full feeling i couldn't get my head around for some time but it seems anyone can exhibit many types of physical symptoms especially from anxiety or stress.. I hope you are not in that place too long today.

inca2

Sorry to hear you're both suffering. My anxiety manifests purely physically too. It's horrible.

One thing that is really getting to me at the moment is the fact that I have been quite unwell for the last 18 months and unfortunately, my GP has been of the opinion that all of my symptoms are psychosomatic. I tried to fight it for a while (pushing for more tests) but then the depression and anxiety became a bigger problem and it was all so overwhelming. Now that I've settled on the antidepressants and the edge has been taken off my depression and anxiety symptoms, I stood my ground in asking for more blood tests. Results came back and finally the GP has realised that there is a bigger problem. I'm now waiting for a second opinion from a specialist (first specialist seems to have been led by the "psychosomatic" thing too) and hoping for a firm diagnosis soon. It's a potentially life-changing illness too so I'm just not sure what to think. It's exactly what I've feared from the start but I was just dismissed. GP apologised and just said that it's a difficult thing to pick up. I'm very frustrated with the whole thing. Mental illness clouds everything

caniask86

inca2 wrote: »

Sorry to hear you're both suffering. My anxiety manifests purely physically too. It's horrible.

One thing that is really getting to me at the moment is the fact that I have been quite unwell for the last 18 months and unfortunately, my GP has been of the opinion that all of my symptoms are psychosomatic. I tried to fight it for a while (pushing for more tests) but then the depression and anxiety became a bigger problem and it was all so overwhelming. Now that I've settled on the antidepressants and the edge has been taken off my depression and anxiety symptoms, I stood my ground in asking for more blood tests. Results came back and finally the GP has realised that there is a bigger problem. I'm now waiting for a second opinion from a specialist (first specialist seems to have been led by the "psychosomatic" thing too) and hoping for a firm diagnosis soon. It's a potentially life-changing illness too so I'm just not sure what to think. It's exactly what I've feared from the start but I was just dismissed. GP apologised and just said that it's a difficult thing to pick up. I'm very frustrated with the whole thing. Mental illness clouds everything

I also find once you GP knows you suffer with Anxiety it feels like they dont take other things as seriously. Really frustrating. Sometimes I find it helps to bring my husband in with me because i get really meek at doctors.

hank scorpio89

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hey Hank i second the men's shed suggestion, drink is a thing for me too, i can enjoy it but if my mood is bad which it has been on and off lately it's really hard to not drink. Finding places to talk without alcohol is tough but men's shed is a good way to go.. Also i hope you find support here, we are all sorts of ages and many types of issues but we all understand at a basic level the loneliness of mental health problems..

Thanks for the responses I may look into the men's sheds .stopped drinking last week gonna sray off it for a while till my heads a bit better.doing a days work tomorrow not much but it's something.