Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

jsms88

Tell me how wrote: »

Fair play to Sinead O'Connor on asking for help. Hopefully she gets the right kind. Poor lady has been struggling for quite a while.

Heard a bit of her video there. Seems at the end of her tether alright.

Hugo Stiglitz

I find that I can often give advice or words of encouragement to people regarding mental health, but I can seldom follow my own advice.

jsms88

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

I find that I can often give advice or words of encouragement to people regarding mental health, but I can seldom follow my own advice.

I think this can often be applied to many aspects of life. Knowing the solution or the right thing to do is one thing but actually being able to do it is a very different one.

Hugo Stiglitz

jsms88 wrote: »

I think this can often be applied to many aspects of life. Knowing the solution or the right thing to do is one thing but actually being able to do it is a very different one.

Well said.

7 Seconds...

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

I find that I can often give advice or words of encouragement to people regarding mental health, but I can seldom follow my own advice.

I'm the same, I am always telling people to think positive and saying whats meant to be will be. I'll then cry my eyes out because my own life has been going down the drain for the last 10 years.:( Deep down I know I am very lucky, my son is healthy, we have a roof over our heads etc... but my A+D takes the goodness out of everything and the feeling of not deserving to happy just adds to the daily struggle.

To be honest its a lot easier to be grateful and think positive when things are going well.:( But the good times will come around again we get what we focus on and focusing on the positives is the way forward!:):):):)

Shpudnik

I find taking a break from it all once on a while. I logged out of all my social media apps and it's nice. Like a hot bath

7 Seconds...

Shpudnik wrote: »

I find taking a break from it all once on a while. I logged out of all my social media apps and it's nice. Like a hot bath

Every good advice!:)

Hugo Stiglitz

Shpudnik wrote: »

I find taking a break from it all once on a while. I logged out of all my social media apps and it's nice. Like a hot bath

I'd be like 99% isolated if I did that.

jsms88

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

I'd be like 99% isolated if I did that.

I need people around me, no doubt. People are a huge comfort when I feel anxious. Maybe they're just good distractions.... I dunno but it seems to help.

But social media can be a bit hit-and-miss I find. People's lives look perfect on Facebook and instagram and so on. People posting pics of themselves having fun or with loads of other people or, as one of my friends keeps doing, gym updates (just to make me feel more inadequate!). People don't post the bad things in their lives so it gives the wrong image completely.

I don't think I'd miss Facebook too much but I don't see myself closing it down either. Is that addiction?

Shpudnik

jsms88 wrote: »

I need people around me, no doubt. People are a huge comfort when I feel anxious. Maybe they're just good distractions.... I dunno but it seems to help.

But social media can be a bit hit-and-miss I find. People's lives look perfect on Facebook and instagram and so on. People posting pics of themselves having fun or with loads of other people or, as one of my friends keeps doing, gym updates (just to make me feel more inadequate!). People don't post the bad things in their lives so it gives the wrong image completely.

I don't think I'd miss Facebook too much but I don't see myself closing it down either. Is that addiction?

My Snapchat has everything. When I'm down I put it on my story.
My Instagram is mostly cars and planes.
And I couldn't deal with Facebook.

7 Seconds...

I deleted facebook earlier this year and have just joined here. I personally prefer boards I just find it nicer in general to be on. I can't be comparing myself to others like I was on facebook which is a good thing. I am so thankful for this thread as well, it's really nice to know I am not alone .

Hugo Stiglitz

jsms88 wrote: »

I need people around me, no doubt. People are a huge comfort when I feel anxious. Maybe they're just good distractions.... I dunno but it seems to help.

But social media can be a bit hit-and-miss I find. People's lives look perfect on Facebook and instagram and so on. People posting pics of themselves having fun or with loads of other people or, as one of my friends keeps doing, gym updates (just to make me feel more inadequate!). People don't post the bad things in their lives so it gives the wrong image completely.

I don't think I'd miss Facebook too much but I don't see myself closing it down either. Is that addiction?

For me, it's a huge "social" outlet. It probably is addictive, but that's the least of my issues!

One downside to social media (but it's hugely outweighed by the many positives) is that it allows me to dwell on how good some people's lives are in comparison to my own. This can cause me some considerable anguish at times, especially if the people on show were people I once cared for or even whom were particularly nasty to me in the past.

The whole "You don't know what's going on in their lives" doesn't hold much water to me. I'm not saying that people potentially don't have their own issues, but if they're able to post up lots of good things, surely they're in a much better position than me. Maybe that's just my bitter self-centered shîthead nature though.

Hugo Stiglitz

Can I come too... wrote: »

I deleted facebook earlier this year and have just joined here. I personally prefer boards I just find it nicer in general to be on. I can't be comparing myself to others like I was on facebook which is a good thing. I am so thankful for this thread as well, it's really nice to know I am not alone .

Boards has been so good to me! I've made so many genuine friends on here over the years and have even met (and continue to meet up with! ) some of them.

7 Seconds...

Also not that I wish anyone ill heath, but thank you very much for being here!

Hugo Stiglitz

Can I come too... wrote: »

Also not that I wish anyone ill heath, but thank you very much for being here!

This thread is amazing due to the caring nature of all who post on it.

Sometimes it's such a relief to converse with people who (whom?) can relate to one's own experience and issues.

Whatsisname

Hey guys,

Bit of an occasional lurker but newly turned poster.

Last week was the first time I saw a doctor about my mental health. I feel I've been suffering from depression and anxiety for a while now, I'm not sure how long but my I know my anxiety has never been to these levels before. While that appointment didn't go very well, I have another next week with a different doctor, hoping for a better experience.

I'm so tired of being sad and nervous.

Shpudnik

Whatsisname wrote: »

Hey guys,

Bit of an occasional lurker but newly turned poster.

Last week was the first time I saw a doctor about my mental health. I feel I've been suffering from depression and anxiety for a while now, I'm not sure how long but my I know my anxiety has never been to these levels before. While that appointment didn't go very well, I have another next week with a different doctor, hoping for a better experience.

I'm so tired of being sad and nervous.

I'm sorry the appointment didn't go well but good on you for going to the doctor about it.

anonym202

Hey, I have been so down the last couple of days again woohoo! But I thought I'd come on here to share what depression feels like to me because writing it down actually helps quite a lot. I'm 20 and have been depressed since I was 16, but I still don't understand it really. Anyway this is it.

It's annoying. Some days you feel happy, grateful and content with life. Other days you are sad, but it's not a normal sad feeling. It can last for days, weeks or months, and it sucks. It drains every bit of energy from you like some kind of hoover, leaving you with no motivation, tired eyes and a strange desire to disappear from the face of the earth. It's a strange feeling because no matter where you are in life, whether you have money, nice stuff, a job.. depression can get ya, and that's why it causes a feeling of guilt and selfishness, because you have the 'ideal life', but yet you are riddled with sadness 'for no reason'. 
Medication, mindfulness, exercise, water and healthy food all help to a certain extent, but do not cure. Once you feel the constant fatigue creeping up on you, the pressure in your head and chest, and the lack of enjoyment in usually enjoyable activities, you know it's coming. 
I try soo hard to just be happy in myself, but I'm always hit even harder with a feeling of self hatred and sadness. I don't want to get dressed or brush my hair. I feel ugly, annoying and selfish, like a burden. I'm making those around me feel sad and uneasy because of my own unhappiness. Everyone has sad days, so why do mine feel like they impact everyone around me so much? I care about everyone and everything, yet I feel like I deserve nobody, because my sad days are better spent alone so I don't hurt anybody.
It's funny because on good days, If a stranger smiled at me in the street, I would think about it throughout the day, about how friendly they were to smile at somebody they don't know just to brighten their day. It's so kind. But on a sad day, If somebody smiled at me I'd feel like i'm on the verge of tears, as if I would just break down if I made any attempt to smile back or even pretend to be happy.
On good days i'm chatty, bubbly and full of energy. I go to the gym and smash my workouts because that's what I love! I smile, laugh and joke. It's like the feeling of depression doesn't exist.
In a way I wish that everyone could experience the empty feeling that depression causes (how selfish of me), but I would hate for people to feel like that also! Agh.. I want to be the happy me, but it's so hard when my mind prefers the sad me. Depression is like a trap of life, and certain people are chosen to find a way out alive. It's definitely challenging.

Hugo Stiglitz

Whatsisname wrote: »

Hey guys,

Bit of an occasional lurker but newly turned poster.

Last week was the first time I saw a doctor about my mental health. I feel I've been suffering from depression and anxiety for a while now, I'm not sure how long but my I know my anxiety has never been to these levels before. While that appointment didn't go very well, I have another next week with a different doctor, hoping for a better experience.

I'm so tired of being sad and nervous.

anonym202 wrote: »

Hey, I have been so down the last couple of days again woohoo! But I thought I'd come on here to share what depression feels like to me because writing it down actually helps quite a lot. I'm 20 and have been depressed since I was 16, but I still don't understand it really. Anyway this is it.

It's annoying. Some days you feel happy, grateful and content with life. Other days you are sad, but it's not a normal sad feeling. It can last for days, weeks or months, and it sucks. It drains every bit of energy from you like some kind of hoover, leaving you with no motivation, tired eyes and a strange desire to disappear from the face of the earth. It's a strange feeling because no matter where you are in life, whether you have money, nice stuff, a job.. depression can get ya, and that's why it causes a feeling of guilt and selfishness, because you have the 'ideal life', but yet you are riddled with sadness 'for no reason'. 
Medication, mindfulness, exercise, water and healthy food all help to a certain extent, but do not cure. Once you feel the constant fatigue creeping up on you, the pressure in your head and chest, and the lack of enjoyment in usually enjoyable activities, you know it's coming. 
I try soo hard to just be happy in myself, but I'm always hit even harder with a feeling of self hatred and sadness. I don't want to get dressed or brush my hair. I feel ugly, annoying and selfish, like a burden. I'm making those around me feel sad and uneasy because of my own unhappiness. Everyone has sad days, so why do mine feel like they impact everyone around me so much? I care about everyone and everything, yet I feel like I deserve nobody, because my sad days are better spent alone so I don't hurt anybody.
It's funny because on good days, If a stranger smiled at me in the street, I would think about it throughout the day, about how friendly they were to smile at somebody they don't know just to brighten their day. It's so kind. But on a sad day, If somebody smiled at me I'd feel like i'm on the verge of tears, as if I would just break down if I made any attempt to smile back or even pretend to be happy.
On good days i'm chatty, bubbly and full of energy. I go to the gym and smash my workouts because that's what I love! I smile, laugh and joke. It's like the feeling of depression doesn't exist.
In a way I wish that everyone could experience the empty feeling that depression causes (how selfish of me), but I would hate for people to feel like that also! Agh.. I want to be the happy me, but it's so hard when my mind prefers the sad me. Depression is like a trap of life, and certain people are chosen to find a way out alive. It's definitely challenging.

Welcome to the thread.

Hugo Stiglitz

anonym202 wrote: »

I want to be the happy me, but it's so hard when my mind prefers the sad me. Depression is like a trap of life, and certain people are chosen to find a way out alive. It's definitely challenging.

Very well said there!

7 Seconds...

anonym202 wrote: »

I want to be the happy me, but it's so hard when my mind prefers the sad me.

Brilliant post and thank you for posting. That line above I have repeated something similar to it to myself for years. It can be very hard to remember that the negativity and lacking of self worth and feeling that we don't deserve to be happy is all the depression talking. Wishing you a good day.:)

trixiebust

Even on a " good day " my mind is already set, waiting for the next bad one to come along.

It's a devil of an affliction / disease or whatever you want to call it. We got some devastating news yesterday, that has pulled me back down to earth, from the relative calm of the last few days.

Hope everyone is doing ok..

Hugo Stiglitz

trixiebust wrote: »

Even on a " good day " my mind is already set, waiting for the next bad one to come along.

It's a devil of an affliction / disease or whatever you want to call it. We got some devastating news yesterday, that has pulled me back down to earth, from the relative calm of the last few days.

Hope everyone is doing ok..

Yeah my "good" days always feel like the calm before the storm.

Sorry to hear that you got some bad news there yesterday. We're all here to talk things out if you need to. Mind yourself x

trixiebust

Thanks. The tension & trauma which I feel I've created around the house lately, has me only blaming myself for it too. My wife feels the same, she's blaming herself.


It's strange how find it easier to write things like this down, as opposed to vocalising them.

jsms88

Welcome. Im reasonably new here too and I find it a great comfort.

Hope everyone's feeling ok today.

Hugo Stiglitz

trixiebust wrote: »

Thanks. The tension & trauma which I feel I've created around the house lately, has me only blaming myself for it too. My wife feels the same, she's blaming herself.


It's strange how find it easier to write things like this down, as opposed to vocalising them.

Don't beat yourself there, TB.

If you both can discuss the situation after the tension subsides, it might work itself out. Take some time for yourself there first.

Writing out stuff really does help.

StoodUpTooFast

Is it wrong/sadistic to take comfort from the fact that other people are going through the same thing? This thread has been of comfort to me this morning, which is all kinds of wrong!

I finally worked up the courage to see my GP about how I've been feeling. I've always figured there was something wrong with me - when I was younger and when I had lots of friends, I was "on" all day - a happy, sociable guy who was always relied on to crack jokes. But when I'd be by myself or in bed at night, I would always bring myself down.

As my circle of friends decreased - all through my own doing, might I add, as I constantly cancelled plans when I couldn't be bothered doing something - these negative thoughts got more and more frequent. My hatred for people and the general public grew. Anger at inconsequential things like losing in a video game got worse.

Stressful times at work really kicked it into overdrive for me. I just couldn't handle it, and the past few weeks have been really tough. Not being able to sleep, having that switch flipped at night where all I can think about is negative, harrowing crap like outliving my family, having to watch people I love die, how I haven't amounted to anything, etc. and crying myself to sleep was the last straw.

My GP has recommend CBT and also prescribed Citrol and a sleeping aid. Has anybody any experience with Citrol? If I'm not allowed ask that, apologies.

Hugo Stiglitz

StoodUpTooFast wrote: »

Is it wrong/sadistic to take comfort from the fact that other people are going through the same thing? This thread has been of comfort to me this morning, which is all kinds of wrong!

I finally worked up the courage to see my GP about how I've been feeling. I've always figured there was something wrong with me - when I was younger and when I had lots of friends, I was "on" all day - a happy, sociable guy who was always relied on to crack jokes. But when I'd be by myself or in bed at night, I would always bring myself down.

As my circle of friends decreased - all through my own doing, might I add, as I constantly cancelled plans when I couldn't be bothered doing something - these negative thoughts got more and more frequent. My hatred for people and the general public grew. Anger at inconsequential things like losing in a video game got worse.

Stressful times at work really kicked it into overdrive for me. I just couldn't handle it, and the past few weeks have been really tough. Not being able to sleep, having that switch flipped at night where all I can think about is negative, harrowing crap like outliving my family, having to watch people I love die, how I haven't amounted to anything, etc. and crying myself to sleep was the last straw.

My GP has recommend CBT and also prescribed Citrol and a sleeping aid. Has anybody any experience with Citrol? If I'm not allowed ask that, apologies.

Welcome along to the thread here.

Jesus, I could have written that post myself. It's mad how similar a lot of our issues are.

No, it's not sadistic to take comfort that others are going through the same thing. It just goes to show how common our struggles can be. It can also serve as a beacon of hope when you hear of others overcoming similar issues.

Really sorry to hear that you're having trouble getting to sleep at night. Not having access to that vital intimate safe space is brutal. Hopefully that sleeping aid will sort that out for you.

I hope you stay around to post on here. It's a great little spot for advice, a good rant, and companionship.

7 Seconds...

StoodUpTooFast wrote: »

Is it wrong/sadistic to take comfort from the fact that other people are going through the same thing? This thread has been of comfort to me this morning, which is all kinds of wrong!

I finally worked up the courage to see my GP about how I've been feeling. I've always figured there was something wrong with me - when I was younger and when I had lots of friends, I was "on" all day - a happy, sociable guy who was always relied on to crack jokes. But when I'd be by myself or in bed at night, I would always bring myself down.

As my circle of friends decreased - all through my own doing, might I add, as I constantly cancelled plans when I couldn't be bothered doing something - these negative thoughts got more and more frequent. My hatred for people and the general public grew. Anger at inconsequential things like losing in a video game got worse.

Stressful times at work really kicked it into overdrive for me. I just couldn't handle it, and the past few weeks have been really tough. Not being able to sleep, having that switch flipped at night where all I can think about is negative, harrowing crap like outliving my family, having to watch people I love die, how I haven't amounted to anything, etc. and crying myself to sleep was the last straw.

My GP has recommend CBT and also prescribed Citrol and a sleeping aid. Has anybody any experience with Citrol? If I'm not allowed ask that, apologies.

I take comfort in the thread too, so don't feel bad about that. Hope things work out positively for you soon:)!

Hugo Stiglitz

Another quiet weekend.