Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

LonelyBoy84

I feel so sorry for my partner having to put up with my issues

cristali

LonelyBoy84 wrote: »

I feel so sorry for my partner having to put up with my issues

I feel the same for my husband, I can see he's trying his best and I don't want to bring him down. He / she loves you no matter what and this is your journey and your partner will support you the most, chin up 😊

LonelyBoy84

cristali wrote: »

I feel the same for my husband, I can see he's trying his best and I don't want to bring him down. He / she loves you no matter what and this is your journey and your partner will support you the most, chin up 😊

The fact my issues at times make me feel totally numb to my partner, or even worse makes me focus on the tiny few negatives about them also makes me feel like a horrible person

We’re meant to be planning a wedding, but when I’m bad it feels like I’ve totally lost the ability to be in a normal functioning relationship-can’t get out of my head, only focusing on negatives

Gremlinertia

Both myself and my partner have mental health problems, it makes things simultaneously easier and more difficult.. We are rarely down or manic at the same time luckily. Our partners are strong people, I try to have more trust in that.. Not always easy of course.. Sometimes pushing them away seems like what I want to do.. That passes though.. It always does..

LonelyBoy84

My partner is amazing. She’s so strong. I woke up this morning & felt scarily numb. Cried a bit. She comforted me & we talked about what I was feeling etc. Told her I felt I was letting her down. She said that the reason she didn’t get down etc, is cause she knows I’m doing everything I can and that I’ll beat it and be myself again at some stage.

That made me feel awesome for a second, until I then worried I might let her down and NOT be my old self at some stage

jaxxx

I officially give up. Drugs don't work, all they do is keep me from flying off the handle at people. Counselling didn't work, literally just throwing money away. So flip it says I, I ain't fighting it no more. Just gonna ebb away until my time comes. Whether that's 10 years or 50 years.

RabbleRouser2k

jaxxx wrote: »

I officially give up. Drugs don't work, all they do is keep me from flying off the handle at people. Counselling didn't work, literally just throwing money away. So flip it says I, I ain't fighting it no more. Just gonna ebb away until my time comes. Whether that's 10 years or 50 years.

I've hit those moments, tbh. It's when I'm like 'f**k the world, I wanna get off'... but you gotta find moments, even tiny moments, when you want to stick around. One of my dogs birthday's was today.

That seems minor to other people, but he really brought a lot of happiness and meaning into my life when he came along. (I lost a dog last year to poisoning-don't know where she picked it up, but it took her-and I was devastated. Another dog was poisoned, and despite both being taken to the vet, only one survived).
I went out of my way to make his food really special, and to just take a little moment to celebrate his life. (He's spoilt already, but no harm spoiling him for another day. )

Just find a moment-even if it's a moment of silence.

Tell me how

jaxxx wrote: »

I officially give up. Drugs don't work, all they do is keep me from flying off the handle at people. Counselling didn't work, literally just throwing money away. So flip it says I, I ain't fighting it no more. Just gonna ebb away until my time comes. Whether that's 10 years or 50 years.

It is so frustrating and upsetting and lonely to feel like that.
I can understand your frustration. Maybe don't fight it, maybe accept your illness for now and just do what you can to give yourself a better quality of life at the moment. Exercise, hobbies, entertainment, if there is something which gives you pleasure and is in any way good for you, then do it.

Counselling and meds can work but it is extremely difficult to get the right dose and the right therapist without having a lot of trial and error. You're experience is unfortunately familiar to many.

In a couple of weeks or months, hopefully your confidence in treatment will be stronger and you can try again.

Also, it's worth noting that some are prone to lower form at this time of year as the nights get longer. It's called SADS.

Shpud2

Tell me how wrote: »

Well, maybe write a summary of last night and take that to your therapist with your sense that you will never be able to fit in. Writing it while it's fresh in your mind might help to communicate it easier to the therapist. it might also indicate statements which are much more influenced by your self-esteem rather than fact.

In the mean time, maybe try to engage with these people on a purely functional level, don't think about or try specifically to fit in or to step back. Just get through the week.

I tried write it. I've been up the past two nights and I wrote about everything that has happened and that I have to deal with and I've just been crying non-stop. I feel so much worse now.

I would try be civil but yesterday one came up to me looking for a fight and I just can't work with that.

Shpud2

Shpud2 wrote: »

I tried write it. I've been up the past two nights and I wrote about everything that has happened and that I have to deal with and I've just been crying non-stop. I feel so much worse now.

I would try be civil but yesterday one came up to me looking for a fight and I just can't work with that.

Shpud am I right in thinking that your neighbours are bullying you?

Shpud2

Deleted User wrote: »

Shpud am I right in thinking that your neighbours are bullying you?

My cousins are bullying me. My neighbours just shun me.

Shpud2

Shpud2 wrote: »

My cousins are bullying me. My neighbours just shun me.

Is there anything your family can do to help?

Shpud2

Deleted User wrote: »

Is there anything your family can do to help?

Unfortunately not. Tried everything and its pointless because they continues with no repercussions.

Shpud2

Shpud2 wrote: »

Unfortunately not. Tried everything and its pointless because they continues with no repercussions.

Are they older than you Shpud?

Shpud2

Deleted User wrote: »

Are they older than you Shpud?

One is and one isn't.

If only your mam and dad and theirs could have a chat and put and end to it all. Do you have to see them often?

Shpud2

Deleted User wrote: »

If only your mam and dad and theirs could have a chat and put and end to it all. Do you have to see them often?

Tried that but it didn't help. Unfortunately I see them a few times a week even though I try to avoid them.

Shpud2

Shpud2 wrote: »

Tried that but it didn't help. Unfortunately I see them a few times a week even though I try to avoid them.

Its very hard on you Shpud to be stuck like that. It seems there isn't anything you can do about them but you can look after yourself. Have a chat with your therapist about it. They should be able to offer you some guidance around dealing with the situation.

Shpud2

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Its very hard on you Shpud to be stuck like that. It seems there isn't anything you can do about them but you can look after yourself. Have a chat with your therapist about it. They should be able to offer you some guidance around dealing with the situation.

There really isn't anything i can do. I will talk to her though I think its the main thing we'll be talking about next time.

realitykeeper

Given the politically correct times we live in, I feel I am about to go out on a limb here by venturing into the realms of common sense. It just seems to me that living a clean and healthy life is the way to go. First and foremost, smoking cigarettes or anything else would be a big no no for me as would substance abuse of any kind. I am not talking about prescribed medication, but things that we know are bad for us like alcohol, tobacco, gambling, drugs and even things like gaming, excess rock`n`roll and too much unnecessary noise. Also, watching pornography and that sort of thing is not really a healthy pursuit. Furthermore, taking on debt really ought to be avoided where possible, especially things like pay-day loans. If you have experienced something like violence or abuse in the past but cannot afford to go the therapy, then why not read books that may empower you, they can be found in every bookshop. Anthony Robbins offers good advice in my opinion but there are many others.

A clean diet with plenty of fruit and veg is a good thing. Superfoods generally help a persons feeling of well-being. Exercise is extremely important in improving my mood so I make time for that everyday. For a lot of people, socializing with people in healthy settings like hillwalking/sports clubs can help but personally I prefer my own company when exercising. Getting out is also great, especially during the winter, I like to go for a walk or a cycle most days.

My final thoughts on these matters, keeping a stiff upper lip works for me but I do keep a punchbag handy to dispense with the odd demon, why self harm when I can punch a bag. Nowadays, people are into all kinds of spiritualism and whatnot but for me, a daily rosary and mass on Sunday is important. Non religious often don`t get the importance of religious ritual but is extremely important in ways we cannot even understand. It is worth checking out the Torah as an example of religious ritual. The Amish peoples also follow religious ritual and I think it stands to them. Hard work, frugality and religiosity are the hallmarks of good living in my opinion. If you are married, it is a good idea to be a good loyal and faithful spouse. These qualities tend to make people wealthy over time.

P.S. Howsabout starting a veg plot in your garden?

RabbleRouser2k

Did anyone else sleep in all of yesterday, only to awake at 4 am this morning?

Just me? Anyways, a little brief. I went to bed late Monday morning. (Was watching a few movies) and decided to have a Soda (not naming the brand, don't wanna get sued ).
Well, I went to bed, feeling exhausted-and sleep was not happening. I literally watched the hours pass by on my alarm clock.
There was heavy wind that morning. Machinery passing a lot, dogs barking, cattle making noise (I'm out in the country) and just a whole host of noise... By 4pm (yes, 4pm) I finally nodded off....and awoke at 4am.

Haven't had insomnia that bad for a lonnnnggg time. I didn't even watch a scary movie, tried to make a hot drink to help me sleep before bed too (hours after the soda) and it just didn't happen.

GoneHome

realitykeeper wrote: »

excess rock`n`roll. Hard work, frugality and religiosity are the hallmarks of good living in my opinion.

The 1950s called, they want you back :rolleyes:

LonelyBoy84

Anyone any recommendations for decent private physciatrists? The two I’ve contacted both have wait lists well into new year

Tell me how

LonelyBoy84 wrote: »

Anyone any recommendations for decent private physciatrists? The two I’ve contacted both have wait lists well into new year

it's a very subjective thing. And location also is a big factor.

Could your GP recommend some to you? Maybe make an appointment with one of the ones you've already contacted while you continue the search. You can decide at Christmas whether to attend or not.

I don't mean to second guess you but just to be sure, psychiatrists are primarily focused on the chemical workings of the brain. They use medication as a primary source of treatment. Psychologists are more focused on the thought processes and emotional elements of the brain and use talk therapy as a primary. Psychotherapists also are focused on talk therapy.

Again, I don't intend to insult you by outlining the above but I've seen people in the past go to psychiatrists and become concerned that all their doing is prescribing medication. This could be very frustrating if you were after waiting 6 months for an appointment. Some psychiatrists also practice talk therapy but in no way to the extent psychologists or therapists do in my experience. All of this is just my uneducated (but somewhat experienced) opinion.

LonelyBoy84

Tell me how wrote: »

it's a very subjective thing. And location also is a big factor.

Could your GP recommend some to you? Maybe make an appointment with one of the ones you've already contacted while you continue the search. You can decide at Christmas whether to attend or not.

I don't mean to second guess you but just to be sure, psychiatrists are primarily focused on the chemical workings of the brain. They use medication as a primary source of treatment. Psychologists are more focused on the thought processes and emotional elements of the brain and use talk therapy as a primary. Psychotherapists also are focused on talk therapy.

Again, I don't intend to insult you by outlining the above but I've seen people in the past go to psychiatrists and become concerned that all their doing is prescribing medication. This could be very frustrating if you were after waiting 6 months for an appointment. Some psychiatrists also practice talk therapy but in no way to the extent psychologists or therapists do in my experience. All of this is just my uneducated (but somewhat experienced) opinion.

Thanks for your post.

Reason I want the appointment is actually to discuss meds. I’m currently on em already, but am unsure if it’s right dosage etc. Anxiety attacks/big meltdowns have stopped (yay!), but still super flat, not excited about future at all, feeling nervous all the time (especially when not busy doing stuff)

realitykeeper

GoneHome wrote: »

The 1950s called, they want you back :rolleyes:

Old fashioned values are needed today more than ever. Less screen time and drug use. The young have been sold a pup. Religion and reverence are of great importance. Material things will not bring fulfillment.

Tell me how

realitykeeper wrote: »

Old fashioned values are needed today more than ever. Less screen time and drug use. The young have been sold a pup. Religion and reverence are of great importance. Material things will not bring fulfillment.

You are posting in the wrong thread.

Gremlinertia

realitykeeper wrote: »

Old fashioned values are needed today more than ever. Less screen time and drug use. The young have been sold a pup. Religion and reverence are of great importance. Material things will not bring fulfillment.

Two things, one: old fashioned values don't really hold up to scrutiny in current conditions at times with the ongoing evolution of society and general modernisation
Two: Religion/reverence are not always part of a person's life and even if they are do not promise fulfillment

There are those that can use these parameters but it's really not as black and white as your statement would suggest. I say this in a non-confrontational manner, i just observe from peer work that it's not so simple..

RabbleRouser2k

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Two things, one: old fashioned values don't really hold up to scrutiny in current conditions at times with the ongoing evolution of society and general modernisation
Two: Religion/reverence are not always part of a person's life and even if they are do not promise fulfillment

There are those that can use these parameters but it's really not as black and white as your statement would suggest. I say this in a non-confrontational manner, i just observe from peer work that it's not so simple..

Tend to agree. I do agree we're sort of 'missing' something that 100 years ago was bringing 'peace' of mind to people who were living in harsher times than we are now.
But I put that down more to community, which is something that seems to get lost more and more as time goes on.

wexie

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

Tend to agree. I do agree we're sort of 'missing' something that 100 years ago was bringing 'peace' of mind to people who were living in harsher times than we are now.

There may well be some of that alright. And perhaps maybe for some religion might fit that gap.

But religion isn't easy to find without faith and faith is pretty hard to fake. Or find if you haven't been brought up with it.