Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Gremlinertia

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Short rant ahead.

Why oh why can i not take my damn meds when i need them most?? Mood has been very bad stability wise lately and anytime it dips badly i pretty much purposely ignore my meds.. Just argued with myself for the last hour to take them.. They were six feet away from me.. What contrary arseholeness is this on my part.. ARGH :mad:

I’m the same way largely because they make me sleep too much. So if I forget to take them till it’s kind of late I usually have an argument with myself whether or not I should in case I sleep in.

Shpud2

I need to stop overthinking stuff. I think too much about the past and I worry too much about the future. I don't know if I'll ever be good enough or I worry that I'm going to be alone forever. I wonder do I have friends or am I just a tool for them? Someone they only talk to when they need something. I look at messages and see the trends and feel like I'm being used but I'll never say it because I'm desperate for their attention like I crave human interaction. And ever night when I'm up with pain these thoughts go through my head and make me feel rubbish.

RabbleRouser2k

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Oh i took them before i ranted it's just one of those contrary parts of my nature that bugs the crap out of me.. Been on meds years, they work, i just have this self destructive thing about me..

It's the disease, isn't it.

I've done similar-and speaking to a therapist, friends and family has made me realise some scary details about myself. I've got a similar, self destructive, beat myself up for s**t element to my personality.
In one respect, depression has sort of made me more introspective, more empathetic and so on.
In other ways, I beat myself up for stuff. There was a month there where I was like 'I'm not taking meds-what's the point'.

The awful thing is, you're kind of brought up to believe or 'trust' your brain. So when it comes to mental illness, it's like this horrific, lying friend who deceives you.

Shpud2

Shpud2 wrote: »

I need to stop overthinking stuff. I think too much about the past and I worry too much about the future. I don't know if I'll ever be good enough or I worry that I'm going to be alone forever. I wonder do I have friends or am I just a tool for them? Someone they only talk to when they need something. I look at messages and see the trends and feel like I'm being used but I'll never say it because I'm desperate for their attention like I crave human interaction. And ever night when I'm up with pain these thoughts go through my head and make me feel rubbish.

Well I believe you’ll be good enough! And if you want I’ll be your friend. I feel the same way a lot though so I can understand to a point how you feel. It’s not very ncie but I can be sure you are definitely good enough and you won’t be alone forever.

Gremlinertia

Holy crap Hayden Ambitious Tea, Shpud and Rabble, i could have written all of your posts. Despite the shyteness of all this it's good to know there are others who get it..

La.de.da

Ah the aul self sabotage. Get that a lot too. Some how thinking the grass might be greener without medication.
Or if I loose a few pounds and someone mentions it. I'll go off and eat all around me.!!!!

Trying to be kinder to myself. We are all way too hard on ourselves.

RabbleRouser2k

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Holy crap Hayden Ambitious Tea, Shpud and Rabble, i could have written all of your posts. Despite the shyteness of all this it's good to know there are others who get it..

Yeah, that's the disease. I suppose it's beneficial to know we're not alone.

There's a song by Colin Hay called 'Waiting for my real life to begin'... and tbh, I empathise too much with it.

Sphud, I feel similar too-some times it feels like 'are they friends', or just using us for status. It's brutal, tbh.
Especially when nobody messages you for weeks-or a supposed friend of mine kept up a pretence of a lie for years, only telling me the truth this year.
It ticked me off, as when he was making up a lie, that same week I was going through a bereavement. Feels like a manipulation tbh.

uh also have an annoying tendacy to forget if I’ve taken them or not xD memory has been progressively worse lately too. Nightmare. I can usually tell if I’m getting emotional listening to music I probably haven’t xD

Gremlinertia

Hayden Ambitious TeaMGS wrote: »

uh also have an annoying tendacy to forget if I’ve taken them or not xD memory has been progressively worse lately too. Nightmare. I can usually tell if I’m getting emotional listening to music I probably haven’t xD

I have alarms set up on my phone, if i'm taking something new i switch them on.. Otherwise good luck.. When i was on one med in particular i'd always feel a bit spaced so had to rely quite heavily on alarms.. Though i then sometimes wondered why i'd set an alarm. :rolleyes:

RabbleRouser2k

Gremlinertia wrote: »

I have alarms set up on my phone, if i'm taking something new i switch them on.. Otherwise good luck.. When i was on one med in particular i'd always feel a bit spaced so had to rely quite heavily on alarms.. Though i then sometimes wondered why i'd set an alarm. :rolleyes:

I take mine at night, before I go to bed, for precisely those reasons. I used to sleep during the day if I took em. I could blink out at a moment's notice.

Gremlinertia

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

I take mine at night, before I go to bed, for precisely those reasons. I used to sleep during the day if I took em. I could blink out at a moment's notice.

Typical, i couldn't take mine all at once.. However usually once i adjusted to whatever level i'd be ok again.

jaxxx

Meds definitely no longer work. Told Doc they wouldn't work even with the increase dosage. Lo-and-behold I was right again.


Meds don't work, counselling don't work, today I started something new which was crying randomly... Can the robots or aliens or super advanced time travelling dinosaurs invade earth already please.....

TG1

La.de.da wrote: »

Best of luck. Look on it as the start of a new chapter.

Thanks so much. Awake and the mind is in overdrive already. Today is going to be fun.

The Crazy Cat Lady

Hi everyone, quick question, do you think you can see depression in someones eyes? One or two people in my life has recognized depression in me, as my eyes were dull etc and other signs

Tell me how

aspiewriter wrote: »

Hi everyone, quick question, do you think you can see depression in someones eyes? One or two people in my life has recognized depression in me, as my eyes were dull etc and other signs

You definitely can't diagnose it as simply as this but the eyes are often a strong indicator as to our level of happiness (in a lot of cases) so I'm not surprised if they saw enough to ask you were you ok.

Many people hide their depression very well and give no indication what is actually going on in their heads through their outward appearance.

Big Vern

Shpud2 wrote: »

I need to stop overthinking stuff. I think too much about the past and I worry too much about the future. I don't know if I'll ever be good enough or I worry that I'm going to be alone forever. I wonder do I have friends or am I just a tool for them? Someone they only talk to when they need something. I look at messages and see the trends and feel like I'm being used but I'll never say it because I'm desperate for their attention like I crave human interaction. And ever night when I'm up with pain these thoughts go through my head and make me feel rubbish.

Hayden Ambitious TeaMGS wrote: »

Well I believe you’ll be good enough! And if you want I’ll be your friend. I feel the same way a lot though so I can understand to a point how you feel. It’s not very ncie but I can be sure you are definitely good enough and you won’t be alone forever.

Just on the overthinking, its something i suffer from. Something i learned from counselling is that once the overthinking starts is to imagine a STOP sign, or a red traffic light. Even have a picture of a STOP sign on your phone or wherever you work. Look at the sign when you start overthinking, try to stop it from starting and getting out of control. May take a bit of practice but its something that helped me, not a cure but helps.

Hope this helps.

wexie

aspiewriter wrote: »

Hi everyone, quick question, do you think you can see depression in someones eyes? One or two people in my life has recognized depression in me, as my eyes were dull etc and other signs

There are many people suffering from depression that show no outward signs whatsoever when they are out and about wearing their 'persona' myself included.

I wouldn't really rely on it as a diagnostic tool to be honest.

If you think they might have a point then go see your GP.

Mind you it would be great if we could rely on what other people 'think' (and using that in the most ironic of senses) they see in you cause in that case I'd be perfectly fine rather than trying to overcome some really ****ty and complicated issues.



If you're worried about what they are saying go see your GP, if you think they're talking a load of nonsense don't. But whatever you do don't take it at face value. Although, even if you did your first port of call should still be the GP.

+1 to the above

I’d definitely pop down to the doctors and if you can’t afford a trip call up your doctor and just explain you’re not feeling great and you think it might be depression ask if they can help in some way because you’re not able to pay the €50 or whatever. They might still see you doctors don’t like to leave people in dire straits.

One More Toy

Does anyone have any tips for developing an appetite? I've been eating next to nothing lately and losing weight

wexie

One More Toy wrote: »

Does anyone have any tips for developing an appetite? I've been eating next to nothing lately and losing weight

no , sadly.

I'm struggling wit the same thing, don't eat regularly enough (not loosing any weight though ) and as a result when I do eat my stomach's in bits.

And I think if I managed to eat somewhat regularly and healthy (that's not normally a problem) things will probably settle down and normalize.

But getting through those first few weeks of discomfort is proven nigh on impossible

RabbleRouser2k

wexie wrote: »

no , sadly.

I'm struggling wit the same thing, don't eat regularly enough (not loosing any weight though ) and as a result when I do eat my stomach's in bits.

And I think if I managed to eat somewhat regularly and healthy (that's not normally a problem) things will probably settle down and normalize.

But getting through those first few weeks of discomfort is proven nigh on impossible

Talk to your doctor-happiness is linked to appetite. I was in a similar position for the last few days. Sometimes even taking a walk can build up appetite. It sort of clears your mind. In the last few days I've had little appetite (tho, tbh, during Halloween all the nuts and fruit come out, and I snack on those like crazy. So I'm actually eating, just eating the healthy snacky stuff. And killing my appetite-which isn't clever, I'll admit). I've eaten dinner in the last few days, but found I'm stuffed and put too much on my plate.

If you can't go outside, I often find opening a window and letting the air in can help, it makes the place less 'stuffy'.

Ugh. Past few weeks I’ve been having weird dizzy spells. Almost like I’m about to pass out for a second or two. Really weird.

Tell me how

Hayden Ambitious TeaMGS wrote:

Ugh. Past few weeks I’ve been having weird dizzy spells. Almost like I’m about to pass out for a second or two. Really weird.

Could it be meds related?

I used to have those brain zapps if I missed my meds.

Tell me how

Tell me how wrote: »

Could it be meds related?

I used to have those brain zapps if I missed my meds.

Hmm maybe. I’m not terribly good at taking them cos of the brain fog/memory issues. I was talking to my psychiatrist and he performed a rather insultingly stupid memory test and determined it was “perfect”. :rolleyes: sure I forget about most things but yeah my memories perfect doc.

Tell me how

Hayden Ambitious TeaMGS wrote:

Hmm maybe. I’m not terribly good at taking them cos of the brain fog/memory issues. I was talking to my psychiatrist and he performed a rather insultingly stupid memory test and determined it was “perfectâ€. sure I forget about most things but yeah my memories perfect doc.

Get a pill case with sections for morning/night for the week. Fill it at the weekend and set alarms specifically for med taking.

You should quickly be able correlate dizziness with your meds or otherwise.

wexie

Tell me how wrote: »

Get a pill case with sections for morning/night for the week. Fill it at the weekend and set alarms specifically for med taking.

You should quickly be able correlate dizziness with your meds or otherwise.

Yup, this.

I used to go :hmmm....feeling all tingly and fuzzy I wonder wh.......oh....better take my tablets.

RabbleRouser2k

wexie wrote: »

Yup, this.

I used to go :hmmm....feeling all tingly and fuzzy I wonder wh.......oh....better take my tablets.

When my dad was put on medication, I picked up a pill box with the week laid out, morning, evening, and night time, Sunday to Saturday.
It spared so much stress and headache, because we're all human and anyone can mess-up.

They're not that expensive, and sold in pharmacies everywhere.
I'm lucky, I only take two pills a day, and it's always at night before bed. So if I forget, it's rare.

henryforde80

Have a doctors appointment made for tomorrow and dreading it. First time going about it and don't know what to expect.

I was called into an office by manager and said you look very sad, Is everything okay with you. Another person higher up called me in as well and said the same thing. Work isn't affected at all.

Other random friends and relatives have said the same thing and after a couple of drinks i nearly start crying.

Anxiety and depression are killing me. I can see why people are saying it to me. You can actually see it in my face that I am not well at all.

I never have anxiety about work. It could be about making lists what I am going to buy in the supermarket for the week, lists about what I am going to wear, anxiety about money, saving, making lists about it even though I am not in debt, Anxiety that people don't like me, Anxiety about some social events, making lists of what I am going to watch on tv for the week. I could make 20 lists some days, just basically anxiety about the stupidest things to the point I feel nauseated.

Also depression, just very down in the dumps. Feel Tired and brain fogged all the time. I have no emotion, not happy, not sad. I just feel blank and don't want to do anything except lie in bed starting at the wall which happens some days. I have lost interest in anything I once found enjoyable.

Hopefully tomorrow will be the start of something new. Willing to try any medication at this stage as getting very bed lately. Only started happening around four years ago.

Gremlinertia

Well done Henry. Might be helpful if you copy what you wrote in your post for the doc to read.. I can find appointments quite stressful and often don't explain myself well, if at all. Seeing as you get anxiety about social events you may have similar issues.. Best of luck tomorrow..

wexie

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Well done Henry. Might be helpful if you copy what you wrote in your post for the doc to read.. I can find appointments quite stressful and often don't explain myself well, if at all. Seeing as you get anxiety about social events you may have similar issues.. Best of luck tomorrow..

Couldn't agree more with this, chances are your head will be spinning before you go in so this is very good advice. Don't even write a note or anything, just literally copy that onto your phone or something.

And if I can offer you another piece of advice : don't do this whole "I'm okay" thing that we've all been taught to do, your doctor already knows you're not okay cause otherwise he wouldn't be looking at you in his treatment room.

Best of luck and be good to yourself, if the appointment is hard sit down for a coffee, if you can't cause you don't want to be in public maybe go for a drive or a walk.

It's a big step to take and you should be proud of it (even though I know that sounds really strange).

(oh yeah and from personal experience, if you get a prescription....you are not the only one ever to hand a prescription for antidepressants or anxiety medication into the pharmacy!!!)