Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

TG1

Gp this morning doubled my medication dose. I suppose it's a good time to play with it when I'm at home with family and not working or driving. But feeling a bit unsure as I've had bad experiences with a similar family of medication in the past.

Also said they wanted to write a stongly worded letter to my manager outlining exactly why I am not fit for work which me giggle but to be honest being off work sick would stress me out more than just ploughing on with it at the moment....

RobbingBandit

Off my feet until Wednesday now possibly Thursday have a world of problems building up with health need to clean my home out as it's cluttered to bits have managed to dodge the invite from the family I currently in touch with lot of uncertainty lies ahead with both health and living situation but for the 5th year running I have a home bloody 7 months homeless ruined my life but it's my life again now no matter how chaotic it has become I control what happens.

That sentence is so uplifting stay safe everyone.

Hate to be a downer. Struggling at the moment. Sitting in the UK. The ex has my daughter this Xmas and it's my first Christmas as a married man so over with her nieces and hitting me hard watching other families being "functional". Thank all of you for being here and contributing. Somehow and someway, whether you are getting on well or struggling, makes me feel a little less alone. I'm surrounded by people yet you mad anonymous bastards make feel "normal". Thank you. Merry Christmas. If anyone ever needs anything, just let me know.

Hate to be a downer. Struggling at the moment. Sitting in the UK. The ex has my daughter this Xmas and it's my first Christmas as a married man so over with her nieces and hitting me hard watching other families being "functional". Thank all of you for being here and contributing. Somehow and someway, whether you are getting on well or struggling, makes me feel a little less alone. I'm surrounded by people yet you mad anonymous bastards make feel "normal". Thank you. Merry Christmas. If anyone ever needs anything, just let me know.

Gremlinertia

I feel like today is a really really bad Sunday (I regularly get really down and/or anxious on Sundays) partner is with family and I'm working, I was trying to tell myself it wouldn't get to me this year but... I am clearly a naive creature still

SMC92Ian

This thread just randomly popped up, must be a sign... just got my notice in work, lost the love of my life this summer and am not doing Christmas this year... life is a struggle every single day.

I wonder how people believe in God in times like this, life is too **** and unfair to exist?

Don't know why I'm telling you this...

My life isn't as bad or near anyone else's here but nothing I do or try ever makes me happy. I just can't escape this misery I've been feeling since that week... it'll never end.

Wouldn't life be great if we could just be like a hard drive and erase horrible feelings or switch off everything so nothing would affect you anymore, no more panic attacks or insomnia due to memories and unsaid words.

derossi

SMC92Ian wrote: »

This thread just randomly popped up, must be a sign... just got my notice in work, lost the love of my life this summer and am not doing Christmas this year... life is a struggle every single day.

I wonder how people believe in God in times like this, life is too **** and unfair to exist?


Don't know why I'm telling you this...

My life isn't as bad or near anyone else's here but nothing I do or try ever makes me happy. I just can't escape this misery I've been feeling since that week... it'll never end.

Wouldn't life be great if we could just be like a hard drive and erase horrible feelings or switch off everything so nothing would affect you anymore, no more panic attacks or insomnia due to memories and unsaid words.

It is the small things, I have seen the end and it's not pretty. What you are going through you need assistance, get help if you can. People love you even if you think otherwise. I am happy to talk to you, even today.

Tell me how

The hashtag #joinin is going once again on Twitter.
Some might get comfort from sharing their story or commenting on others.
Be warned, there's happy and sad stories in there but it's a lovely idea and helpful to many.

Take care.

https://twitter.com/SarahMillican75/status/1077363699931844608?s=19

fr336

Hi guys anyone remember me? No didn't think so lol

Gremlinertia

Hi Fr i do indeed, how are you?

fr336

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hi Fr i do indeed, how are you?

Thanks Grem, I definitely remember you! Things have gotten both better and much worse for me - I've kind of got my life back on track in terms of work etc but have got so much worse anxiety and depression wise in the process. I'm still unable to do what I want in life - can't concentrate, and now deeply unhappy which wasn't really me when I used to post on here! I may have been incapable, but I was always still happyish. Gonna have to bite the bullet and give antidepressants a go I think - will probs feel better than in 10 years.


How are you? Merry Christmas...

Gremlinertia

It seems like a system of checks and balances or something. I'm very grateful for my medication but i'm kind of in a holding pattern until i can do more talk therapy.

I hope the coming year brings improvements for you.

forgodssake

Hi all
I'd like to join in here. Feeling terrible today . Have had the worst year imaginable . Struggled to get out of bed this morning but have kids so no other choice . Today everyone seems to be happy and I'm just a ball of misery just want to avoid people until this blows over as it does . I have some really good days and then it's as if someone says hang on a minute she's happy now let's ruin this .

Gremlinertia

More than welcome to join in, today is a tough day on so many because we have to force ourselves to appear cheerful, hopefully you get a quiet day in the near future to be nice to yourself..

RabbleRouser2k

fr336 wrote: »

Thanks Grem, I definitely remember you! Things have gotten both better and much worse for me - I've kind of got my life back on track in terms of work etc but have got so much worse anxiety and depression wise in the process. I'm still unable to do what I want in life - can't concentrate, and now deeply unhappy which wasn't really me when I used to post on here! I may have been incapable, but I was always still happyish. Gonna have to bite the bullet and give antidepressants a go I think - will probs feel better than in 10 years.


How are you? Merry Christmas...

Welcome back Fr.

I think that seems to be a running theme-most of us are unable to do what we want in life. Like, it's hard to focus.
I know myself that I have dreams, ambitions and so on that I sort of wonder 'are they just fantasy? should I drop them and move on?'

If you're going on the medication, do think about counselling with it. It can help, and they can often help you to understand if the meds might need adjustment too.

Anyways, everyone look after themselves today. It's rough, unfortunately.

batgoat

Found today to be extraordinarily difficult. So many people were around, some still are and I just want to go curl up in a ball. Just find it all too much for my senses.

Gremlinertia

batgoat wrote: »

Found today to be extraordinarily difficult. So many people were around, some still are and I just want to go curl up in a ball. Just find it all too much for my senses.

If the option is there to go to a room or even bed to ease the stress do it..

fr336

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

Welcome back Fr.

I think that seems to be a running theme-most of us are unable to do what we want in life. Like, it's hard to focus.
I know myself that I have dreams, ambitions and so on that I sort of wonder 'are they just fantasy? should I drop them and move on?'

If you're going on the medication, do think about counselling with it. It can help, and they can often help you to understand if the meds might need adjustment too.

Anyways, everyone look after themselves today. It's rough, unfortunately.

Thanks Rabble, much appreciated.


If it's purely MH stuff holding you back, definitely don't give up on dreams!


May I ask if you take meds yourself? If so, which ones? Totally fine to not answer either of these!

RabbleRouser2k

fr336 wrote: »

Thanks Rabble, much appreciated.


If it's purely MH stuff holding you back, definitely don't give up on dreams!


May I ask if you take meds yourself? If so, which ones? Totally fine to not answer either of these!

That's no problem, Fr.

I hope it is just MH issues-but that's the douchiness of MH. Makes me question everything in my life.

That's no problem-and I just have to add that this is medication that works for me. We're all different, and what works for one mightn't work for another, so keep with it as your doctor tries out different meds or dosages.

I'm on Fluoxetine (prozac) 60 mgs. It was 40mgs, but the dosage had to be adjusted after I found I needed it. It got my sleep pattern more regular. So that was important for me.
Years back I Was given Effexor-had to stop taking it after a few months. It wasn't the right medication for my illness, and made me go all over the place in terms of my mind.
Fluoxetine helps a lot.

As did the counselling. Even just talking out stuff with family or friends, rather than bottling stuff up, is important.

batgoat

Gremlinertia wrote: »

If the option is there to go to a room or even bed to ease the stress do it..

Just gonna read Sandman on my laptop and try to relax. Dull out everyone else. Mad how much of a strain Easter and Christmas are.

forgodssake

I'm doing everything I shouldn't I'm drinking and smoking ,hoping life is a bad dream but its not is it ? . It's real . We are living and for that we should be thankful however ****ty we feel . Honestly today for me is the epitome of despair .

fr336

I just feel like my best days are behind me, world is moving on without me and I fixate on what I haven't had than what I have had And then I think about losing what I do have and just think negative about everything. And never calm.

Gremlinertia

Soon it's time for bed, sod today and the hardship it brings.. Sod new year too, baby steps some days, try to look out for yourselves the next few days.. We can muddle through.

fr336

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Soon it's time for bed, sod today and the hardship it brings.. Sod new year too, baby steps some days, try to look out for yourselves the next few days.. We can muddle through.

Funnily I like New Year's, I like the natural positive feeling around the place that doesn't feel as false as Christmas and that anything could be possible in the year ahead.

Gremlinertia

fr336 wrote: »

Funnily I like New Year's, I like the natural positive feeling around the place that doesn't feel as false as Christmas and that anything could be possible in the year ahead.

Horses for courses i guess, i tend to feel most lonely at new years

SMC92Ian

I didn't get up till 5 on Xmas day, purposely stayed in bed... Didn't bother opening gifts until 4am and the two I bothered with were both big memories of the past so that shut me back down... only up today now. What's the point though.

Gremlinertia

SMC92Ian wrote: »

I didn't get up till 5 on Xmas day, purposely stayed in bed... Didn't bother opening gifts until 4am and the two I bothered with were both big memories of the past so that shut me back down... only up today now. What's the point though.

That sounds awfully tough. It's a total fcuk of a time of year.. I've just been sleeping outside work myself.. Have you anyone you would talk to?. Or Samaritans are always good for calm listening with no judgement.

SMC92Ian

Gremlinertia wrote: »

That sounds awfully tough. It's a total fcuk of a time of year.. I've just been sleeping outside work myself.. Have you anyone you would talk to?. Or Samaritans are always good for calm listening with no judgement.

Nobody knows I'm going through this, I kind of told one person I wasn't okay
but they didn't care and left, assumed I was just been a downer or whatever... I'll be grand used to surpressing it for years so just need to get past Xmas and New Years I hope as these past few months have literally broke me.

Also got my notice in work... good time of the year haaa!

Gremlinertia

Kicking you while you're down wha? Well i hope you can find a bit of solace here, a lot of people posting and reading here in similar pain..

RabbleRouser2k

fr336 wrote: »

I just feel like my best days are behind me, world is moving on without me and I fixate on what I haven't had than what I have had And then I think about losing what I do have and just think negative about everything. And never calm.

Jeez-I feel like I could have written that post. I often get that feeling. The worst thing is, if the 'past years' were the best-than that's depressing. Because those years haunt me the most. They feel like s**t, when I think about them. People who went on to have 'great' lives treated me like utter crap.

Like, when everyone else was sorta 'hang loose, no troubles' I was the 'panic stations, time is fleeting, everyone you love will be gone before you know it' which is true, at least according to my life. I hear people talking about 'oh, I was reckless aged...' and I just think 'wow, I was the complete opposite'-I was pretty much s**t scared of everything and aware of my mortality.

When people say 'I don't listen to the judgement of other people' I remember I pretty much had it drilled into my skull how other people's opinions of me mattered more than my own.