Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Checkmate19

I used to run but when i was really sick but had no desire to when i was really sick. Just felt flat. With the help of the tablets the flatness went and now i'm back running which i always loved.

Gremlinertia

Medication has been great for me, I've had some talk therapy over the years but it's pricey and public wait lists are really long so the meds help keep me level while I save and wait.. Took a while to get the type and level right though which was disappointing initially

Red Lightning

Depersonalisation makes it difficult for me to leave familiar people/surroundings for a sustained period of time. It's like when I leave my usual routine, I lose myself and don't know who I am which in turn causes panic attacks.
I'm on medication which has helped but am wondering if I should give CBD oil a go to try and help push me a little further. I'm living at home with my parents but would love to move to go to university but my anxiety currently won't alllow it.

Gremlinertia

I found DBT to be good for this Red. Can't comment on CBD as I trialled it for pain relief last year and didn't notice much of anything.. Each person's experience may vary of course.. Perhaps discuss with your doctor..

SMC92Ian

Lots of people here have talked to someone I see, can you tell me how it'll work... Do I go to a GP and just say whatever, I dunno how this works and struggle sharing and opening up, I don't want to end up at some shrink wasting their time cause I can't speak or something... I guess I'd like to know how this goes so I can prepare.

Gremlinertia

SMC92Ian wrote: »

Lots of people here have talked to someone I see, can you tell me how it'll work... Do I go to a GP and just say whatever, I dunno how this works and struggle sharing and opening up, I don't want to end up at some shrink wasting their time cause I can't speak or something... I guess I'd like to know how this goes so I can prepare.

I went to my gp first, I brought a note I'd written because I tend to get muddled and clam up but needed help so the note did the work for me thankfully.. He was very understanding and made me feel a little better about being honest in things.. That's ten or twelve years ago and the I wish I had done it earlier. I do hope your own doctor is as understanding, best of luck if and when you go..

TG1

SMC92Ian wrote: »

Lots of people here have talked to someone I see, can you tell me how it'll work... Do I go to a GP and just say whatever, I dunno how this works and struggle sharing and opening up, I don't want to end up at some shrink wasting their time cause I can't speak or something... I guess I'd like to know how this goes so I can prepare.

I went to my gp, started to talk, fell apart, sobbed for a while, pulled myself together, chatted to him about everything and left feeling positive about the fact that I'd admitted the problem.

I've since had a few appointments with him, used my EAP to attend counselling, discussed a clinical psychologist referall with my gp... All positive stuff starting from me not being able to string a sentence together for crying.

Tell me how

SMC92Ian wrote: »

Lots of people here have talked to someone I see, can you tell me how it'll work... Do I go to a GP and just say whatever, I dunno how this works and struggle sharing and opening up, I don't want to end up at some shrink wasting their time cause I can't speak or something... I guess I'd like to know how this goes so I can prepare.

Have you someone who you can use as a confidant and support? If so, tell them you want to get help and then set up an appointment with your GP.

As Gremlinertia said, some benefit from writing out what they want to say is easier than actually saying it.

You mentioned that you haven't been to a GP in a long time, ask the secretary for a late evening appointment maybe so that you can take as much time as you need without feeling that there are others waiting and so you must be quick.

I asked my GP for help, I told him I wanted him to direct me to get the care I needed and that if he suggested something, I would try to do it. This helped me because it made me feel that I was under care and that the decision making was not solely down to me.

If you do have that confidant, maybe they could visit the GP with you to support you and to maybe speak for you if you find it too difficult.

Also, this can be a long journey with peaks and troughs, unfortunately, there is no quick immediate fix but starting is the first step and many do find that they do see improvement quite quickly. Best of luck.

SMC92Ian

Tell me how wrote: »

Have you someone who you can use as a confidant and support? If so, tell them you want to get help and then set up an appointment with your GP.

As Gremlinertia said, some benefit from writing out what they want to say is easier than actually saying it.

You mentioned that you haven't been to a GP in a long time, ask the secretary for a late evening appointment maybe so that you can take as much time as you need without feeling that there are others waiting and so you must be quick.

I asked my GP for help, I told him I wanted him to direct me to get the care I needed and that if he suggested something, I would try to do it. This helped me because it made me feel that I was under care and that the decision making was not solely down to me.

If you do have that confidant, maybe they could visit the GP with you to support you and to maybe speak for you if you find it too difficult. I

Also, this can be a long journey with peaks and troughs, unfortunately, there is no quick immediate fix but starting is the first step and many do find that they do see improvement quite quickly. Best of luck.

Nope I have nobody, the one person I thought I could count on showed their true colours and does not give two ****s.

All I know is after today I can't go on like this, I need help, I'm bottling in too much and I'm worried I'll end up doing something that there will be no coming back from.

I just need to find a way to go about it now...

Tell me how

SMC92Ian wrote: »

Nope I have nobody, the one person I thought I could count on showed their true colours and does not give two ****s.

All I know is after today I can't go on like this, I need help, I'm bottling in too much and I'm worried I'll end up doing something that there will be no coming back from.

That's ok too.

Make the appointment, write out what you would like to say and go to it. If you can speak to the Dr then do so but you will have the note if necessary.

It really can get better.

lbc2019

"Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong."
Muhammad Ali

Red Lightning

Does anyone else really struggle with self esteem. I hate my face. I'd love to be handsome but I'm just not. A friend of mine gets 100's of matches on tinder and I dont get anywhere near that. I'm in my twenties and I've never had a woman I fancy ever fancy me back. Its so demoralising.

mrmorgan

Red Lightning wrote: »

Does anyone else really struggle with self esteem. I hate my face. I'd love to be handsome but I'm just not. A friend of mine gets 100's of matches on tinder and I dont get anywhere near that. I'm in my twenties and I've never had a woman I fancy ever fancy me back. Its so demoralising.

I know this as much as anyone and i do think thats the centre of my depression.

but i keep saying to myself, there is always someone perfect for yourself

SMC92Ian

mrmorgan wrote: »

I know this as much as anyone and i do think thats the centre of my depression.

but i keep saying to myself, there is always someone perfect for yourself

I dunno if it's worse to never find someone who loves you really for you or to find that person and then lose them... what do they say? You don't miss what you never had.

Checkmate19

I lost my best friend tuesday. 42. Great guy. One of the reasons im here today. Never gave up on me. I was gone six years ago without him and a few others i was gone. It just needs someone or something to latch onto to turn things. After that it slowly gets better. Never give up. My best mate never gave up on me. He's up in heaven now( natural causes). Just keep going everyone latch onto something. Its not easy but the smallest thing can turn it. GP, tablets, friends talk all things are part of the puzzle. Stay strong everyone. NEVER GIVE UP EVER.

TG1

What are people's thoughts on certs for work? My gp suggested I take a few weeks to take a breath and reset, but I refused as I would be afraid
1) it would make everything in work worse
And
2) I would find it harder and harder to go back the longer I stayed out.

Has anyone ever done this and gone back? Was it helpful?

Tell me how

TG1 wrote: »

What are people's thoughts on certs for work? My gp suggested I take a few weeks to take a breath and reset, but I refused as I would be afraid
1) it would make everything in work worse
And
2) I would find it harder and harder to go back the longer I stayed out.

Has anyone ever done this and gone back? Was it helpful?

The cert only has to state that you are medically unfit for work, it doesn't have to mention mental illness.

If you trust your boss, it may be helpful to tell them you're been finding it difficult in this area as they may support you once you return but you do not have to. People may ask you directly why you were out but you can use some bland response such as back trouble or headaches to explain that if you think not giving any reason would be worse

Consider how you would spend the time off. If it would help you unwind and get away from stresses of work, then it sounds beneficial, if you would miss the distraction and socialisation of work and might spend all day in bed, it might not be most suitable.

You and your Dr are best judges.

SMC92Ian

Tell me how wrote: »

The cert only has to state that you are medically unfit for work, it doesn't have to mention mental illness.

If you trust your boss, it may be helpful to tell them you're been finding it difficult in this area as they may support you once you return but you do not have to. People may ask you directly why you were out but you can use some bland response such as back trouble or headaches to explain that if you think not giving any reason would be worse

Consider how you would spend the time off. If it would help you unwind and get away from stresses of work, then it sounds beneficial, if you would miss the distraction and socialisation of work and might spend all day in bed, it might not be most suitable.

You and your Dr are best judges.

I wouldn't trust anyone anymore about opening up with mental health problems, my last job everyone sat around the cantine taking the mick out of mental health, including the manager.

forgodssake

TG1 wrote: »

What are people's thoughts on certs for work? My gp suggested I take a few weeks to take a breath and reset, but I refused as I would be afraid
1) it would make everything in work worse
And
2) I would find it harder and harder to go back the longer I stayed out.

Has anyone ever done this and gone back? Was it helpful?

I took a month off last year . Started anti D's around same time . Really helped me settle . Felt much better going back , first day was hard but felt good to be 'normal' again IYKWIM. Sometimes a reset can kickstart everything again . Have good days and bad days but nowhere as bad as before .

Tell me how

SMC92Ian wrote: »

I wouldn't trust anyone anymore about opening up with mental health problems, my last job everyone sat around the cantine taking the mick out of mental health, including the manager.

I told my manager and he could not have been more supportive while I was out and when I returned.

I would not share publicly at work, only if I feel the manager is trustworthy. They cannot share such information.

TG1

My managers most of my problem, hence my reluctance to give them any more fodder. GP really thinks it would do me good, I'm lucky to have a great mam and dad who would take me in and spoil me for a few weeks to help reset the stress levels, and help out getting my own place a bit more sorted when I felt up to it etc...

But I just can't feel easy about the work side. Am torn at the moment. Took time as annual leave and due back tomorrow. GP said ring for a cert if you need and I'm actually getting sick here with the stress of the thought of heading back in but I know I'll be there.

Phoning in would be harder than just turning up and putting up I think.... I know that's an awful way to be but....

BohsCeltic

SMC92Ian wrote: »

I wouldn't trust anyone anymore about opening up with mental health problems, my last job everyone sat around the cantine taking the mick out of mental health, including the manager.

That is shocking. My Manager kept pushing me to go back to work and i did but it was way too soon. Now i am out longer but luckily my job has been supportive to me. Paying for CBT. I've met other people in my job who are struggling too because i was open about it.

When i was first out sick one girl was complaining that i left them a lot of work. I took a step back and just said excuse me i was sick. If it had of been a man i probably would have decked him, that's how i felt. But i took a step back and just said i was sick and this is not helping me. Went straight to HR and got my old role back.
Some people don't understand but i can guarantee they are hiding their own problems.

SMC92Ian

Guess it's a gamble, you'll either get lucky and have a boss who is understanding or a typical Irish attitude that think mental problems = freak or weakness and it's about time that stigma F'd off.

carzony

Hi Folks,

I'm really struggling with these anxiety hot flushes to the point my face is becoming extremely red and spotty. I'm almost constantly in a state of severe heat in work even on quiet days with little activity. It's starting to effect me as i'm aware of my red face and hot feeling.

SMC92Ian

carzony wrote: »

Hi Folks,

I'm really struggling with these anxiety hot flushes to the point my face is becoming extremely red and spotty. I'm almost constantly in a state of severe heat in work even on quiet days with little activity. It's starting to effect me as i'm aware of my red face and hot feeling.

Whats causing the attacks?

carzony

SMC92Ian wrote: »

Whats causing the attacks?

Just constantly in a state of high stress/anxiety.

I've been like that no matter what wether unemployed, working, working in different teams, buildings ect.. I'm really beginning to worry about my long term health given my almost constant stress/anxiety levels.

I'm free of medication at the moment but think I should be on something for my general anxiety. Honestly, the thought of engaging with a GP is enough to put me off seeking help.

RabbleRouser2k

Did anyone else have a weird weekend filled with odd hours and too much sleep (about 17 hours on Friday, woke up at 5 am Saturday morning and 19 hrs Sunday, woke at 7am Monday morning-so slept thru the day, pretty much. Tho went to bed at 10 am which didn't help). It felt really weird, I couldn't sleep enough.

My mum and brother have been sick over the last few days (nothing major, just a bad headcold/ or a flu-dunno) so they asked me to run into town to pick up a few panadols, honey and lemon...and brandy. Cos Irish cures

But I found myself sleeping for most of the day on Friday and also on Sunday. It was frustrating, because even if it's a little something I get done for myself, I like to feel productive. Otherwise it feels like a waste.
Whenever anyone's sick-even a cold or flu-I sort go into stress/ worry mode-which seems to drain me.
And that's what happened to me, I think.
It's just a cold, I know it's just a cold-but I tend to worry about catching it myself, as well as worrying about how it affects others.

It's kind of a child hood thing-I used to get sick a lot (even somehow managed to get the mumps as a kid-despite getting all the vaccines). So getting sick now is like 'great, days where I can do sweet flip all-not even concentrate'.

TG1

Insomnia is really getting to me. I was on Al last week so slept some then but haven't had more than an hour or so a night since Saturday night. Really struggling to hold it together during the day as a result.

Red Lightning

TG1 wrote:

Insomnia is really getting to me. I was on Al last week so slept some then but haven't had more than an hour or so a night since Saturday night. Really struggling to hold it together during the day as a result.

Have ya tried:
- Eating healthier
- Cutting Caffeine out of your diet
- Exercising

TG1

Red Lightning wrote: »

Have ya tried:
- Eating healthier
- Cutting Caffeine out of your diet
- Exercising

Yep, all things I've implemented as part of dealing with anxiety.