Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Hugo Stiglitz

Euphoria Intensifies wrote: »

Hugo Stiglitz wrote:

A journey along the path of depression/anxiety/associated mental issues is one of constant self-education. As with education in general, everyone is of a different ability to learn and adapt. I can now see that this will be a lifelong journey and as such will be a life of learning too. This seems like a huge challenge at the moment, but I can imagine that it'll be a rewarding journey once it is complete.

I agree 100% Hugo - I have learned so much about myself over the past few years. Although those lessons were learned through pretty shi**y circumstances, I'd still rather know these things about myself than not know them.

Hope everyone is enjoying the bank holiday!

I agree, it's best to learn these things, especially as young as possible.

I'm not quite ready to accept them yet though, but I know it's something that I must do. So I'll be working on that.

Hope you're keeping well there, EI. x

StripedBoxers

Sick of being guilt tripped and having my mental health deliberately played on.

Someone give me a winning lottery ticket, please!!!!!!!!!!

bridgettedon

I hate when people give you advice when they weren't asked for their opinion. I was in great form. Just after having a cry in bed now. So much for a good week. I'm pretty confident of the direction that I'm going in. I know where my weaknesses are and I don't need someone telling me what to do. It makes me want to do the opposite. I know it's so childish. For example I was trying not to do one particular thing, someone then out of the blue tells me not to do this thing and now I've just done it.

darkpagandeath

I have been moved onto another set of SSRI's Everything feels very soft and got a feeling of falling sometimes. Is it a normal side effect ?

Tell me how

bridgettedon wrote:

I hate when people give you advice when they weren't asked for their opinion. I was in great form. Just after having a cry in bed now. So much for a good week. I'm pretty confident of the direction that I'm going in. I know where my weaknesses are and I don't need someone telling me what to do. It makes me want to do the opposite. I know it's so childish. For example I was trying not to do one particular thing, someone then out of the blue tells me not to do this thing and now I've just done it.

Sometimes people suggest things more as here's what you "could" do but we hear it as "should" do. That can maybe lead us to think that they are interfering but in their mind they were just interacting. Not sure of the exact details of what upset you but I thought I'd just mention that.

The important part of your post for me was "I'm pretty confident of the direction I'm going in". That's wonderful to be able to say that. Carry on doing whatever allows you to feel that way. That's success right there for those that manage to do that.

Shint0

darkpagandeath wrote: »

I have been moved onto another set of SSRI's Everything feels very soft and got a feeling of falling sometimes. Is it a normal side effect ?

My experience the first time taking an SSRI was somewhat like that. At the time I was living in a city with lots of cobbled steep sloping streets and walking down (or up) the streets I felt I was constantly tripping over and tripping myself up in the cobblestones. Not quite like being drunk. More like trying to walk while wearing someone's glasses with strong lenses. It was like my brain and feet weren't in sync, my brain couldn't register if I had already taken a step or about to take a step. This subsided after about two weeks. I didn't experience this on any subsequent AD I was tried on. So your experience is not uncommon and should pass once your brain adjusts to the new drug.

Gremlinertia

Phew tough time there. Feeling the exhaustion now.

Tell me how

Gremlinertia wrote:

Phew tough time there. Feeling the exhaustion now.

Is it behind you now at least? Hope so.

Gremlinertia

Tell me how wrote: »

Is it behind you now at least? Hope so.

For the most part i think. Delicate situation, been so tense all my muscles are screaming at me.. Luckily i have great faith in the restorative powers of tea.

bridgettedon

Gremlinertia wrote: »

For the most part i think. Delicate situation, been so tense all my muscles are screaming at me.. Luckily i have great faith in the restorative powers of tea.

Anything like a hot shower or bath to help with the muscles. I actually love my hot water bottle as I find it soothing.

Gremlinertia

I'm in work so it'll have to wait until morning. It's ok though, used to pain, just having a little pity party for myself..

bridgettedon

Gremlinertia wrote: »

I'm in work so it'll have to wait until morning. It's ok though, used to pain, just having a little pity party for myself..

I have one of those every few days. because sometimes life is hard and some self pity is required to give us a break from all the other thoughts.

Gremlinertia

Oh i totally agree, i give myself a set amount of time for it maybe once a week or so..

Hugo Stiglitz

I came close to cracking today. Really close.

I feel better now though thankfully.

Selfish sleep deprivation is so bad!

Gremlinertia

Ouch Hugo, lack of sleep is horrendous to deal with because you feel less able to cope.. You did well to come through.

Hugo Stiglitz

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Ouch Hugo, lack of sleep is horrendous to deal with because you feel less able to cope.. You did well to come through.

Had no choice but to slog it out!

Getting a good sleep routine is my final frontier! haha

mickstupp

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Getting a good sleep routine is my final frontier! haha

Me too. It's one of the main ways I self-sabotage actually. Like right now this minute, instead of being IN bed, sleeping, so I'll be able to concentrate and function tomorrow, so I can be less stressed and calmer... I'm ON bed surfing. A moron.

Hugo Stiglitz

mickstupp wrote: »

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Getting a good sleep routine is my final frontier! haha

Me too. It's one of the main ways I self-sabotage actually. Like right now this minute, instead of being IN bed, sleeping, so I'll be able to concentrate and function tomorrow, so I can be less stressed and calmer... I'm ON bed surfing. A moron.

You're the furthest thing from a moron, friend!

Gremlinertia

Mick i reckon sleep is still one of my major issues, i keep telling myself i don't need that much, i'll be grand atc. Then i'm at work and in the horrors, i'll never learn

bridgettedon

mickstupp wrote: »

Me too. It's one of the main ways I self-sabotage actually. Like right now this minute, instead of being IN bed, sleeping, so I'll be able to concentrate and function tomorrow, so I can be less stressed and calmer... I'm ON bed surfing. A moron.

Its the same for half the world to be fair so you are far from a morkn. I know what you mean though. How about put the tablet or phone on the other side of the room.

mickstupp

bridgettedon wrote: »

Its the same for half the world to be fair so you are far from a morkn. I know what you mean though. How about put the tablet or phone on the other side of the room.

Well it's only partly that. It's mostly because I have this annoying feeling that the sooner I go to bed the sooner I wake up. And I hate waking up. The thought of another day. I'm ok (sort of) once I get into the day, but the first half hour or so is pure horror.

bridgettedon

mickstupp wrote: »

Well it's only partly that. It's mostly because I have this annoying feeling that the sooner I go to bed the sooner I wake up. And I hate waking up. The thought of another day. I'm ok (sort of) once I get into the day, but the first half hour or so is pure horror.

There's always a reason why we do things. I get where you're coming from. I don't like geting up early as the day can seem so long stretched out in front of you. And that can get me quite down.

Hugo Stiglitz

mickstupp wrote: »

Well it's only partly that. It's mostly because I have this annoying feeling that the sooner I go to bed the sooner I wake up. And I hate waking up. The thought of another day. I'm ok (sort of) once I get into the day, but the first half hour or so is pure horror.

I hear ya there.

Gremlinertia

Hadn't thought of it that way Mick, yet it seems pretty true.. Something similar for me is that i hate going home or to work, but once there i don't want to leave.

StripedBoxers

Absolutely horrific few days for me.

Found out other day that my occupational therapist is leaving, I've cried constantly since then.

They aren't replacing her either, and there's only one other OT here, who isn't taking on more clients as she is unable to given her own current caseload plus the waiting list.

My OT is referring me for counselling/therapy with their psychologist, no guarantee I'll get it as the main consultant has to do the referrals usually but he won't refer me, so whether this means he will refer me now I don't know. I've seen him four times since 2014 for it and he only ever gives me a bloody useless prescription.

When my therapist leaves (within a few weeks) I won't have any professional support at all bar my GP, and if my referral is accepted, I've at least a year to wait, not including emergencies that come in between now and then.

I'm devastated. She is the best therapist I have ever attended, she is incredible at her job. I didn't expect her to leave, only a month ago she told me she'd be seeing me for the next year possibly two.

I don't know what to do, I feel like I am back at sq.1, where I was before Xmas.

I can feel myself already withdrawing into myself, not going out, not mixing/interacting with others etc.

Gremlinertia

Yikes Boxers, that's rough. I nearly lost all control when my therapist said she was off on maternity leave. The waiting is horrible.. How would you be fixed for aware or pieta or some other group as a way of helping until you get more help?.

StripedBoxers

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Yikes Boxers, that's rough. I nearly lost all control when my therapist said she was off on maternity leave. The waiting is horrible.. How would you be fixed for aware or pieta or some other group as a way of helping until you get more help?.

I wouldn't mind near as much if it was maternity leave, least it'd be temporary, this is permanent. As for not knowing whether my referral will be accepted, that's torture.

I am still under assessment, so now I will be discharged from the OT service and need to wait for an appointment with the psychologist and then if I get it, I'll have to start another assessment which and after the assessment I may be put on counselling officially (ie: no longer on assessment).

Not fixed for other counselling at the minute unfortunately.

Gremlinertia

Hopefully the delay won't be too long since you're already in the system.. Keep away from people who drag you down as much as possible and see if there's any support group type thing you could go to i guess. I know news like that would put me on my ass.

StripedBoxers

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hopefully the delay won't be too long since you're already in the system.. Keep away from people who drag you down as much as possible and see if there's any support group type thing you could go to i guess. I know news like that would put me on my ass.

I've to start from scratch as I have never had counselling/psychology there before so essentially for the psychologist I am a new client so I'll be on the waiting list like others, about a year it is, not including emergencies that come in between now and then.

Doing that as much as I can, difficult as there's a few I can't keep away from but I minimise contact/interaction as much as possible. I currently attend mental health groups but its via occupational therapy, so they'll all stop (for me) now as I'll no longer be in occupational therapy.

I don't know what to do, I'm at a loss.

Gremlinertia

Hmm. The system needs a lot of work alright, it's a massive loss not being able to continue with the group stuff. Is the plug definitely pulled on that?. Have you read the sticky for this forum? There's a few sites listed that offer support that perhaps you haven't thought of before..