Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Gremlinertia

I had to go through a few counsellors before i found one that i could communicate with.. Before that i was incredibly frustrated with people who just seemed to tilt their head to one side and mm-hmm their way through a session. I decided that much like getting on with work colleagues or other people you can't like them all.

Tell me how

Gremlinertia wrote:

I had to go through a few counsellors before i found one that i could communicate with.. Before that i was incredibly frustrated with people who just seemed to tilt their head to one side and mm-hmm their way through a session. I decided that much like getting on with work colleagues or other people you can't like them all.

Absolutely. It's like they don't realize that they are also being assessed.

AnneFrank

Yes i'd have to say i'd agree with Jezzer on feeling conned, especially at those prices. The idea of containment is interesting if you had some people you really trusted in life, trusted to tell everything to without fear of being judged. If you have that person in your life i'd give it a bash

jezzer

jezzer wrote: »

I totally agree with you, these guys dont operate on a real world level, i wouldnt be a fan of majella on donnell but i had to agree with her when she spoke out about these guys high fees, its not right how they can charge those amounts to vulnerable people, personally i've always had a problem with the whole paying councellors thing, you go in pour your heart out, they nod and act sympathetic then swiftly tell you the hour is up, get their money and rush you out the door, its all just too cold and transaction like for me, i'm not saying this is the case for everybody but thats been my experience, i remember one time seeing a councellor for a while and i just felt like i was being conned, one day after a session i went out to my car and sat there for a bit and she came out and got into her big BMW and drove off and i remember thinking to myself i've helped pay for that yet i still feel ****....again if councelling works for you fantastic, it just wasnt for me....

i'm sorry your experience has been bad regarding friends and family not wanting to accept your mental health issues, dont give up on people though someone out there can help

Do you think therapists should work for free?

Gremlinertia

Deleted User wrote: »

Do you think therapists should work for free?

Doubt anyone wants anyone to work for nothing, it's more a problem of the health system in this country along with the increasingly insane cost of medical insurance

Gremlinertia

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Doubt anyone wants anyone to work for nothing, it's more a problem of the health system in this country along with the increasingly insane cost of medical insurance

There is a problem with the health system in this country no doubt about it but more and more I'm encountering people who want a very specialised service for little or no cost. That's just not possible. Therapy is a commitment to your state of mind. If you can't afford the cost then have a look at ways you could save money.
There was a time when I was paying €60 a week. That meant no takeaways of little treats. It was the best money I have ever spent.

ivytwine

[Deleted User] wrote: »

There is a problem with the health system in this country no doubt about it but more and more I'm encountering people who want a very specialised service for little or no cost. That's just not possible. Therapy is a commitment to your state of mind. If you can't afford the cost then have a look at ways you could save money.
There was a time when I was paying €60 a week. That meant no takeaways of little treats. It was the best money I have ever spent.

I agree. I've had 2 free counsellors through college and work, but the one I'm currently attending is definitely worth the money I'm paying.

It's hard I know but I can only advise people to shop around and only hand over money to someone you feel is earning it. When you find a good counsellor you will know right away.

ivytwine

ivytwine wrote: »

I agree. I've had 2 free counsellors through college and work, but the one I'm currently attending is definitely worth the money I'm paying.

It's hard I know but I can only advise people to shop around and only hand over money to someone you feel is earning it. When you find a good counsellor you will know right away.

Absolutely. It's important to shop around in order to find the right therapist that you have a good fit with. Accredited Psychotherapists are very specialised with years of training and experience behind them. It's a very expensive business to fund. Yes I'm sure there are charlatans out there but my experience has been one of huge empathy and emotional intelligence.

jezzer

AnneFrank wrote: »

Yes i'd have to say i'd agree with Jezzer on feeling conned, especially at those prices. The idea of containment is interesting if you had some people you really trusted in life, trusted to tell everything to without fear of being judged. If you have that person in your life i'd give it a bash

well said

jezzer

Deleted User wrote: »

Do you think therapists should work for free?

Nobody can work for free, and i'm not one to go government bashing at every opportunity as we all need to take responsibility for ourselves but in the instance of mental health, i think there needs to be a root and branch look at the fees being applied and also the performance and credentials of mental health workers, i also think there should be emergency subsidies available to people who find themselves in a very dark place so they can access the treatment they need, for example if someone is out of work they get the dole, some people have medical cards, can we do something around mental health where someone can apply for emergency subsidies to pay for their treatment on a short term basis, maybe pay it back at a later stage or through their tax credits but something has to be done to break the barrier between excessive fees and people with mental health issues who cant afford €300 a pop...

Gremlinertia

Especially when there are plenty of unaccredited counsellors out there, it's very easy to get caught out, especially when your mind is in it's own turmoil. Perse makes good points about the level of training and hours that must be put in to be genuine but again you still have to 'get on' (so to speak) with the therapist/counsellor you're talking to..

AnneFrank

It's great it helped you guys, but you can't expect everyone else to give up takeaway treats and suddenly find 60euro a week, lots of people have given up all treats and still have zero extra money, and we all have different issues that could cost alot more than your problem alone. If it was subsided in some way that would help

jezzer

AnneFrank wrote: »

It's great it helped you guys, but you can't expect everyone else to give up takeaway treats and suddenly find 60euro a week, lots of people have given up all treats and still have zero extra money, and we all have different issues that could cost alot more than your problem alone. If it was subsided in some way that would help

exactly, everyone's situation is different, some people cant just "find" 60 quid like that, especially for people with mental health issues, money can be a big issue, lots of sufferers are unable to work due to depression etc and money becomes very tight, it always seems ironic to me that a person cant work because of depression yet they are expected to either fork out 60 to 300 quid for help or go on a waiting list to see the local HSE mental health service which is inadequate in terms of mental health as quick intervention is crucial

Gremlinertia

There's also the problem of minimum wage/low paid jobs where one can't get a medical card but can't scrape together the money to see someone.

I agree with all points about the services being subsidised. It's a very fragmented operation and I haven't a notion how one would go about fixing it. When you're in the public system as an inpatient I think it works very well. James' hospital has an excellent psyc department. It seems to me that the difficulty arises when you're at the other end of the scale and hospitalisation isn't required.

€300 for a psychiatrist consultation does appear ridiculous but perhaps this is a person at the absolute top of their game who has no issue getting bums on seats for that price.

jezzer

Deleted User wrote: »

I agree with all points about the services being subsidised. It's a very fragmented operation and I haven't a notion how one would go about fixing it. When you're in the public system as an inpatient I think it works very well. James' hospital has an excellent psyc department. It seems to me that the difficulty arises when you're at the other end of the scale and hospitalisation isn't required.

€300 for a psychiatrist consultation does appear ridiculous but perhaps this is a person at the absolute top of their game who has no issue getting bums on seats for that price.

yes you are right and that is the problem, they have no problem getting bums on seats but the bums on those seats are the ones who can afford it, meaning that there are some vulnerable people falling through the cracks. I'm glad to hear that the hospitalisation end of the scale works, thats really good to hear and you are correct, i think its the other end of the scale where the problems lie, say for example someone hit a really bad patch and this person was just about scraping by financially, they cant afford the high end psychiatrists, maybe cant afford to take time off work unpaid, maybe just cant scrape together 60 quid a week for a councellor so they have to try negociate their way into the HSE provided care which i believe is sparse, under resourced and under staffed, if that person got the right help in time they may be able to overcome that bad patch but if not things could potentially get rapidly worse, what if that person could be subsidised at that point and swiftly got the right care needed and paid for o their behalf but at a later stage that money would be repaid to the state through the tax system or x amount off their gross salary for x period of time, say within a yearly time frame...something like that needs to be done

Trebor176

I've an appointment at 10am in the morning. It's €40.00 for around an hour. I took it because the appointment suits. I can't always get the time on weekdays, due to work and whatnot. I had made an appointment in another place, but the time didn't suit. They're booked out on weekends for the foreseeable. It's €55.00 there for an initial 35 minute consultation, and I think €95.00 for hour-long ones there on. But, cardholders are cheaper.

I'm really going tomorrow more to seek advice as to what to avoid with a similar situation to one I've been in, if something like that ever arose again. I worried myself with the way I handled it. I knew I needed to chat to someone. The other night proved that.

I don't see myself doing weeks of counselling, being honest. I just need to chat to someone, though. As I say, it's just to explain what has happened, how I felt, and how things can be avoided in the future. I mean, my family know I'm stressed over work and college. But, the other thing is something I don't want to tell them, considering the circumstances.

On the plus side, I've a job interview on Tuesday morning. If I get this, it will be the first step to making changes in my life. And, I want to do anything I can to improve my lifestyle. Maybe the feelings I've experienced of late will be less likely to occur again, if I can make sure to just focus on more things, especially things I can look forward to.

Tristrams Shandied

Trebor176 wrote: »

I've an appointment at 10am in the morning. It's €40.00 for around an hour. I took it because the appointment suits. I can't always get the time on weekdays, due to work and whatnot. I had made an appointment in another place, but the time didn't suit. They're booked out on weekends for the foreseeable. It's €55.00 there for an initial 35 minute consultation, and I think €95.00 for hour-long ones there on. But, cardholders are cheaper.

I'm really going tomorrow more to seek advice as to what to avoid with a similar situation to one I've been in, if something like that ever arose again. I worried myself with the way I handled it. I knew I needed to chat to someone. The other night proved that.

I don't see myself doing weeks of counselling, being honest. I just need to chat to someone, though. As I say, it's just to explain what has happened, how I felt, and how things can be avoided in the future. I mean, my family know I'm stressed over work and college. But, the other thing is something I don't want to tell them, considering the circumstances.

Just to pick up on the point of availability of services and the cost if needing support around a particular issue, but there are many excellent free voluntary services available in the country where people give up their free time to assist others and talk through an issue. I was grossly violated by someone recently and I have to say the various organisations which support victims are excellent, completely free and found their knowledge and experience to be equal to those of paid services. It's amazed me the complete kindness of strangers who give up their free time and the type of support services on offer free of charge if you need them.

population

*modsnip*

Trebor176

I had my consultation this morning. The counsellor, in my opinion, was great. It felt good to be able to say how I felt about everything that has been going on with me of late. He understood, and what he said made absolute sense. It's up to me, though, whether I need to go back. But, if I feel I need to, he'll fit me in. I'll give myself a few days, and if I have any relapses again, I'll be in touch. It was €40.00 for an hour long consultation, so it wasn't too bad. I don't know if I could have lasted another week with things hanging over me! Yet, I wasn't in a bad way, if that makes sense.

Snugglebunnies

Has anyone ever spent time in a psychiatric ward? How were you admitted? What was your experience like? Did it help you?

Tell me how

Snugglebunnies wrote: »

Has anyone ever spent time in a psychiatric ward? How were you admitted? What was your experience like? Did it help you?

I spent some time in St Pats a few years ago. Can send you a PM on that if it is that type of inpatient care you are talking about.

I think inpatient care is like meds and counselling. It is very subjective and 2 people undergoing the same treatment plan can have different experiences.

St Pats does require that you have a decent health insurance policy which is better to be aware of upfront.

Snugglebunnies

Tell me how wrote:

St Pats does require that you have a decent health insurance policy which is better to be aware of upfront.

I don't have any health insurance, so maybe inpatient care isn't an option for me. Kilkenny would be the nearest hospital to me.

Hugo Stiglitz

Snugglebunnies wrote: »

I don't have any health insurance, so maybe inpatient care isn't an option for me. Kilkenny would be the nearest hospital to me.

I don't think you need insurance for it. I could be mistaken though.

Edit: I misread that out-patient. Sorry.

Snugglebunnies

Tell me how wrote:

St Pats does require that you have a decent health insurance policy which is better to be aware of upfront.

I have no health insurance so maybe inpatient care is not an option for me. Kilkenny would be the nearest hospital to me.

chsdeddijj

Deleted User wrote: »

There isn't a person in this world without struggles. Ivy mentioned in her post having the "death heebiejeebies". Well that's my issue and I rarely talk about. Apart from the odd mention of having a dose of the hypochondrias
No therapist worth their salt would think that oh this person doesn't need to be here. You would be met with respect and empathy.

The reason why I believe your self-esteem is low Trebor is because how you reacted to the girl you dated was completely out of context to the actual reality. You say that she didn't care how you felt and kept dismissing you. In what ways I wonder did this occur? How would you have liked her to be?

I'll give you an example of my experiences with dating. There have been loads of men who I met and really liked but who did not feel the same towards me. We'd be chatting for a bit online and a definite connection would be present. So a date would be arranged. In person we get on really well, have a kiss and make plans for a second date. That also goes well.

Afterwards he changes his mind. Who knows why. Well obviously he stops being interested and that's that. He tells me and we both move on. There is absolutely nothing wrong with changing your mind and deciding that this person isn't for you. It doesn't mean he or she is inadequate just that you have no feelings for them. Do you get me?

Strong self-esteem would also lessen feelings of lagging behind. If you like yourself enough then what other people are doing won't matter as much. Yes there will come a day when you meet someone who makes you feel special but first you must feel it alone, for yourself because that's what you deserve

persepoly, You seem to me to mention therapy and therapists in a very positive way, and quite a lot in your replies and I am just wondering if you are one yourself, or perhaps related to one?

chsdeddijj

veganrun wrote: »

Review is over and it didn't go great. Overall I apparently met my objectives but I've areas to work on and if my performance was the same next year I'd be getting a negative score. They also mentioned there may be an option for me to move into a slightly different role if that is something I'd be interested in.

Overall feeling pretty upset but trying not to show it.

WANDERER78 is right! Don't let it get you down it's not the end of the world and who knows maybe in a years time you will be doing something different and that person that gave you your review, well is long gone from your memory.

Tell me how

Snugglebunnies wrote: »

I don't have any health insurance, so maybe inpatient care isn't an option for me. Kilkenny would be the nearest hospital to me.

I'm only speaking about my experience of St Pats which was that health insurance was required.

That's not to say that is required in all locations but if not paying with health insurance then it will be on the public healthcare system you will be treated. What I've heard, but am in no way 100% certain that it is absolutely the case, is that inpatient treatment on the public healthcare system is usually only for cases where there is an immediate need for someone to be in a safe/monitored environment.

I'm sure someone else here will have more information.

chsdeddijj

chsdeddijj wrote: »

persepoly, You seem to me to mention therapy and therapists in a very positive way, and quite a lot in your replies and I am just wondering if you are one yourself, or perhaps related to one?

I have been in therapy myself and found it to be absolutely fantastic. Of course that was just my experience

La.de.da

Just on the therapy. I would have always dismissed it as talking about things proves very hard with me. But when you find the right counselor/ therapist it's really invaluable.

It took some time for me to find the right one. Each therapist has his or her own approach and demeanor.